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Surprising my wife with the cruise of her dreams


terrific_surprise
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I am relatively new to Cruise Critic, so I apologize if this is not the best place to post this, but I couldn't seem to find a better place. This is not primarily a "question" (though there will be one question near the end if you can bear with me that far), but is intended to be a means of sharing my cruise-planning experience, including how I have found Cruise Critic to be helpful with my scheme to surprise my wife.

 

When I turned 50 last July, my wife's sincere efforts to celebrate my birthday didn't turn out well. In the process of sharing her frustration over the experience, she mentioned her wish that we could go on a cruise to Hawaii for her 50th birthday. It was stated in almost the same way that someone might say "I wish I could travel to the moon," because it was obviously so far out of reach. I determined at that moment to try to find a way to make it happen.

 

We have cruised twice before, a 3 day Carnival Catalina-Ensenada cruise for our 20th anniversary (paid for by a pastor friend) and a 7 day Princess Mexican Riviera cruise for our 25th anniversary (paid for by a collection taken up from our supporters by another pastor friend). (My wife and I met these pastors and supporters through our work running a non-profit Christian ministry to pregnant women.)

 

My wife has talked about wanting to go to Hawaii with me from before the time we were married. She went there once for 3 days (I think) as part of a college choir tour, but I have never been there. When she has talked about Hawaii, I have always told her that it would probably never happen (not trying to be a wet blanket, but I just didn't want her to get her hopes up). But after all she has been through for me, our 11 children, and so many others and their children, I decided that she deserves this, and decided to begin setting aside some money to make it happen (Lord willing).

 

When I first made this decision, I knew that I wanted it to be a surprise, but I also wanted her to be able to plan ahead for it, and for her to be able to enjoy the sense of anticipation. (I had wanted to make our 25th anniversary cruise a surprise, but two pastors' wives I consulted at that time told me that she needed to be able to make adequate preparations, so I didn't.) So how can I make this a surprise and still give her plenty of time to anticipate and prepare? That question set me on a long and winding road, much of which still lies beyond the horizon.

 

I began setting aside the checks I received from some computer work I did on the side, and was planning to contact Princess Cruises to see how much money I would need to book a March 2013 cruise. I never considered checking with anybody other than Princess: while we had enjoyed our brief Carnival cruise, we truly bonded in a special way on the Sapphire Princess, our "Love Boat." But before I even got around to contacting Princess Cruises, I received an unexpected call from Charles, a new Princess cruise vacation planner. When I learned that the Golden Princess cruise to Hawaii would depart from LA on my wife's birthday, I was initially disappointed (believe it or not)! Why couldn't it be "our ship," the Sapphire? It didn't take long for me to realize how similar the Golden Princess and Sapphire Princess are, and eventually I figured out a way to make even this change of ships help to make the whole experience even more exciting.

 

For a couple of weeks, I focused on trying to come up with enough money for the booking deposit before the deadline (which Charles graciously extended). I think I had a million (well, at least a dozen) questions for Charles, who probably was a bit overwhelmed. Meanwhile, I came across Cruise Critic, initially in an effort to find out as much as possible about the Golden Princess before putting my money on the line. (Although I knew that the money was refundable, to me the booking deposit still felt like a final decision. And of course, I wanted to get the best deal possible.) Soon a thread entitled something like "An OCD review of cruising to Hawaii on the Golden Princess" caught my attention -- and kept my attention for hours, as I jotted down note after note.

 

Lanie, the author of the "OCD" thread, included photos of almost every part of the cruise: different areas of the ship, various locations at each port, and even the food! These photographs gave me an idea: if I could find 118 photographs, each of which showed something my wife would (likely) experience during the cruise, I could give her these photographs throughout the year leading up to her 50th birthday. The photographs would need to be beautiful and enticing, but not easily identifiable: drawing her in to the surprise, but not giving anything away. Lanie's photos (along with others I found on other threads and from other sites) gave me just what I was looking for (such as these photos of Salt Pond Park and Glass Beach and this photo of Princess' mango cheesecake).

 

On the back of each photo, I planned to write a clue about something related to the cruise. Could I really come up with 118 suitable photos and clues? I wanted to be sure -- I didn't want to risk getting halfway through the year and running out of ideas. But the juices were flowing, with plenty of ideas provided by Cruise Critic, and before long I had more than enough.

 

That all happened in October, when I put down the money for the booking deposit. Other ideas also developed during that time, such as how to use Valentines Day 2013 to help build anticipation for the March cruise.

 

Since that time, the ideas have continued to flow and develop, far beyond what I ever imagined. New Year's Eve 2011/2012 became the opportunity for the first hint of what was to come, and Valentines Day 2012 provided further clues. But the real year-long process of unveiling the cruise gift began at a surprise party I held for her on her 49th birthday. (Why have a surprise party on her 49th birthday? I wanted her to have a surprise party, but I knew that she couldn't have it on her 50th birthday because that was the day the cruise would start.)

 

As her 49th birthday dawned, I presented her with a "Happy 50th birthday" card. She was not, to say the least, impressed. "Do you really think that I'm 50?!" Ouch, I almost blew it big time with that! She missed the part of the card that talked about wanting to celebrate her "all year long" until I emphasized it to her.

 

That night, about 60 friends and supporters gathered for the surprise party. Thankfully, they were smart enough (unlike me) not to buy into it as her "50th" birthday party (although that was what I put on the invitations), with our friends who were in charge of the decorations preparing a banner which clearly proclaimed it to be her 49th.

 

There were many things I planned for that evening (with so many months to plan it, and my desire to make everything just perfect), but it all culminated in her opening a little envelope (which was the final gift-clue in a series of gifts-within-gifts that I presented to her). Inside the little envelope was a photograph, with a clue written on the back, and a puzzle piece. Although she was thrilled with almost every part of the party, this final gift turned to be quite anticlimactic, and lacked the excitement that I had hoped it would generate.

 

However, since that time, as I have continued to give her another envelope every few days, she is starting to catch on. The initial photographs and clues are intended to be as vague as possible. My hope is that within 3 months or so, she will know for sure that she is going on a cruise, but she will not be sure where the cruise is going. By the time her birthday rolls around next March, I am hoping that she will be convinced that it is another cruise to Mexico (as I will deliberately show some Mexican-related photos such as the huge Mexican flag in Ensenada). However, I will be giving her at least as many clues relating to each Hawaiian port as the number of clues I am giving her from Ensenada, so it may be unrealistic for me to think that she will not figure out that the destination is Hawaii before her 50th birthday (especially if she figures out how to use something like Goggles).

 

Well, if you have been bearing with my verbosity so far, I do have a real question for which I am hoping to find an answer. Many of my photographic clues are based upon the 2012 appearance of the Golden Princess (for example, a statue of a dolphin, or the big ice cream cone on the wall at Sundaes). Is is likely that the drydock scheduled for May of this year will result in any serious changes to the appearance of the Golden Princess? How can I find out?

 

Even if some things are changed, if 75% of my clues are still valid for our cruise, I will consider this effort to have been worthwhile.

 

My hope is that throughout the cruise, she will be seeing things with which she has already become familiar, so that it will seem to her like she has already been there even though she is experiencing it for the first time.

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You are amazing...of that she already knows...Have a wonderful trip of a lifetime and the memories it will give both of you !! Usually only cosmetic changes are done nothing major that will be very noticable..she'll be too overwhelmed to notice at that point !!

Edited by Ashland
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That whole story was amazing. PLEASE post when she does figure it out! I can't wait to hear her reaction! You are a true romantic, and world could use more like you. Have a wonderful time, the trip of a lifetime. Enjoy it, and your wifes anticipation. Hope she does not find CC! You are an angel:)

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Awww what an amazing plan :) I don't think she will care if anything changes on your ship. The amount of effort and care you're putting into pleasing her is pretty overwhelming. I doubt she'll notice if something isn't quite right in one or two of the photos and if she does notice I really really doubt she'll care.

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Yes, cruisinminiof3, I do hope that she doesn't somehow find her way to this post. I did consider that possibility before posting this, but in her case I thought it was a small risk because her online activities almost exclusively happen on Facebook (so you'll be doing me a favor if you refrain from mentioning it there). Her online activity also occurs primarily through her phone, which makes it less likely for her to access sites that are not designed for mobile viewing.

 

Thanks for all of the kind comments. Thanks to the women for the "awwws" and my apologies to the men. (If it is any consolation to those men who feel that this sets the bar way too high, this is definitely a unique demonstration of love toward my wife, almost certainly a once-in-a-lifetime gift, as I have already told her. But perhaps something here will also get some romantic juices flowing for some of you men, without taking it to my extremes.)

 

My apologies also for those who are shocked by our 11:eek:! I also would have found that to be a bit shocking in the past. Thankfully they arrived one at a time (that's easy for me to say, because I wasn't the one who went through all the "labor").

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I love your ideas!!! I hope the surprise holds out for a long while - it's nice to have a new surprise to figure it out. Please come back to this post to keep us in the loop - I'm going to subscribe to the post so I can get updates :)

 

and YAY on the big families (notice my screenname!). Your 9th is my favorite (lol)

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I love your ideas!!! I hope the surprise holds out for a long while - it's nice to have a new surprise to figure it out. Please come back to this post to keep us in the loop - I'm going to subscribe to the post so I can get updates :)

 

and YAY on the big families (notice my screenname!). Your 9th is my favorite (lol)

 

Just for you, youngestof9, I have attached your favorite (our 9th). He's quite a ham with the camera. (I would link some of the online videos he has posted, but that would give away too much.)

 

Incidentally, I'm relatively confident that the surprise will hold out -- at least in some aspects. Even if at some point she reads this entire thread, there are certain things I won't disclose to anybody until she experiences the related surprises. Yes, I know I am going overboard on this, almost embarrassingly so, :o but at least once in a lifetime shouldn't a husband go overboard for his wife?

 

For lcmslady and any who think I am a "gem," you haven't had to live with me every day. If you knew everything my wife has had to put up with (including having 4-5 teenage boys at a time for many years and for years to come, with all of the issues that accompany them) the "romance" might lose some of its luster. (And I don't have any single brothers, but I do have some single sons.) ;)

 

Nevertheless, I do hope that this is a great romantic story, for those who are interested enough to take the time to follow it. (And I'm confident that my wife would agree.) There are some surprises that have already happened that I may share here soon, but for the most part I will avoid giving away too much about future surprises (with some carefully considered exceptions).

2012samuel_kiss.jpg.29e19257b5600498c600f57f2016ca22.jpg

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Just for you, youngestof9, I have attached your favorite (our 9th). He's quite a ham with the camera. (I would link some of the online videos he has posted, but that would give away too much.)

 

Incidentally, I'm relatively confident that the surprise will hold out -- at least in some aspects. Even if at some point she reads this entire thread, there are certain things I won't disclose to anybody until she experiences the related surprises. Yes, I know I am going overboard on this, almost embarrassingly so, :o but at least once in a lifetime shouldn't a husband go overboard for his wife?

 

For lcmslady and any who think I am a "gem," you haven't had to live with me every day. If you knew everything my wife has had to put up with (including having 4-5 teenage boys at a time for many years and for years to come, with all of the issues that accompany them) the "romance" might lose some of its luster. (And I don't have any single brothers, but I do have some single sons.) ;)

 

Nevertheless, I do hope that this is a great romantic story, for those who are interested enough to take the time to follow it. (And I'm confident that my wife would agree.) There are some surprises that have already happened that I may share here soon, but for the most part I will avoid giving away too much about future surprises (with some carefully considered exceptions).

 

 

woohooo quite a ham! Me too! I like him already ;)

 

I think what you're doing is wonderful - even if this is the only time in your marriage you went above and beyond, it's just perfect. Marriage is give and take and sometimes giving is more fun than taking :)

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What a wonderful surprise you've planned! I'm excited to follow the story and just have to give another shoutout for big families, since I'm #8 of 10! (#8 being the best of all, of course) ;) Kudos to your wife for giving so many children so much love and time. I often wonder how my mother did it!

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What a wonderful surprise you've planned! I'm excited to follow the story and just have to give another shoutout for big families, since I'm #8 of 10! (#8 being the best of all, of course) ;) Kudos to your wife for giving so many children so much love and time. I often wonder how my mother did it!

 

My brother (#8) used to sing the theme song to "Eight is Enough" to me. LOL! I still wonder how my mom did it.....

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What a wonderful surprise you've planned! I'm excited to follow the story and just have to give another shoutout for big families, since I'm #8 of 10! (#8 being the best of all, of course) ;) Kudos to your wife for giving so many children so much love and time. I often wonder how my mother did it!

 

Attached is a photo of our #8 (with #9 in the background). The two of them have a little web show together where they demonstrate their wackiness, and this is a promo shot from their page.

 

attachment.php?attachmentid=229672&stc=1&d=1334348211

 

It's a nice surprise to be able to connect with others from large families here. (I am used to shocking people with our "11" so the :eek: reactions were no surprise.)

2012chris_sam.jpg.d3fdffeb31ae9375334490f33b187e18.jpg

Edited by terrific_surprise
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Thanks for the pic! Looks like you have some great kids who know how to find joy in life!

 

It's a nice surprise to be able to connect with others from large families here. (I am used to shocking people with our "11" so the :eek: reactions were no surprise.)

 

I always heard those reactions growing up, too. The funny thing is, the other day, DH and I were leaving a restaurant with our 4 kids and I heard a lady say as we walked by "Whoa! That's a lot of kids!" Made me chuckle, especially since I live in the land of large families.

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An important turning point in the process of planning the "cruise clues" that I would give my wife happened when I realized that I should include San Pedro in the hints. In fact, as I began to consider the things we could do around San Pedro, it eventually became evident that San Pedro could become one of the most romantic ports on the itinerary: I now expect to give her more clues from San Pedro than the number of clues related to Hilo, Oahu, Kauai, Maui and Ensenada!

 

It was not that way when we celebrated our 25th anniversary on the Sapphire Princess cruise (which of course started and ended in San Pedro). On embarkation day, we hurried right to the ship and didn't even pause to look at the fountains. Even after the cruise ended, when we had some time to kill, we focused on getting out of town.

 

My plans now include some special activities in and around San Pedro in February 2013 (near Valentines Day) which will, I hope, build the sense of anticipation to a crescendo. Then, of course, we will return to San Pedro on her birthday and pick things up where we left off. :)

 

Because of the importance of San Pedro as the starting point of the cruise, it seemed to me to be appropriate to make San Pedro the subject of the first clue I gave her. The attached photo shows that clue, which was in the little golden envelope she opened on her birthday. On the back of the photo, I wrote "your 50th year will prepare you for the adventure of a lifetime."

 

sanpedro-vincent-thomas-bridge4_20120327.jpg.fd3af918d2a00f21e7dc8558338bb738.jpg

 

The Fanfare Fountains, the Red Car, nearby lighthouses and ocean views, and some unique restaurants should give us some great San Pedro memories to include in our cruise. But most of all, I hope that the experience of watching "our ship come in" will be priceless.

 

And San Pedro is close enough that after the cruise (when we have those "I miss the cruise" blues) we will be able to revisit some of these romantic spots and feel in a small way like we are back on the cruise!

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I always heard those reactions growing up, too. The funny thing is, the other day, DH and I were leaving a restaurant with our 4 kids and I heard a lady say as we walked by "Whoa! That's a lot of kids!" Made me chuckle, especially since I live in the land of large families.

 

Yes, I remember people responding that way when we just had 4 kids (or even 3 I think). And often of course they would say "so you're done having kids, right?" That's when our answer would really shock them. ;)

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Tonight I took my wife out to dinner at an Acapulco Restaurant. This is the second time I have taken her to Acapulco since Valentine's Day, and I plan to take her to Acapulco various times again over the coming year (culminating in a meal at the Acapulco in San Pedro). My plan is that make her think that Acapulco is a "clue," but in fact I will never say that (because, of course, we will not be going to Acapulco on the cruise). I'm assuming that Hawaii trumps Acapulco, so I'm hoping that she won't eventually be disappointed that we aren't cruising to Acapulco.

 

My official pretext for going to Acapulco was simple: "I have a coupon." (We always try to use coupons when we go out to eat.)

 

After ordering, I excused myself to the restroom. While I was there, I sent her a text message saying "check the sugar." I had hidden a little gold envelope with the sugar, and in the envelope was another clue and puzzle piece. (This is the pattern I am trying to follow, sending her phone a text clue which points her to the envelope clue.)

 

Above the sugar dispenser was a beach photo. I commented on the color of the ocean water in the photo. She compared it to the color of the water in Hawaii (perfect! I thought)! Then she said "so are you going to be giving me this (referring to the beach photo) some time soon?"

 

"I don't think so," I responded (being glad that, as it seemed, she was catching on).

 

Then she said "so do these little pictures and the songs represent places we have been in our lives or what?"

 

I responded with appropriate ambiguity, not wanting to give too much away yet. (The "songs" she mentioned refer to other musical clues I have not yet explained here.)

 

"So how long is it supposed to take me to figure this out?" she asked.

 

"It will take a while," I responded.

 

Last Saturday, I had tried to give her another clue, but the process didn't work quite as I had planned. I gave the little gold envelope to our #9. His middle name is based upon a reversal of my name (because before we were together Terri used this reversal when she was talking to her friends about me but didn't want anybody else to know she was talking about me).

 

So after giving the envelope to our #9, I sent my wife a text message saying "backwards me has something for you."

 

She didn't understand. After a few hours, our #9 came to me saying "she still hasn't asked me, what should I do?" I told him to go to her and ask her why we gave him his middle name. He did so, and she explained to him that his name was based upon my name spelled backwards, but even then she didn't get it.

 

"What should I do now?" he asked.

 

"Just keep waiting," I responded, hoping that it would eventually come to her.

 

By Tuesday, he was tired of waiting, and just gave it to her. Oh well, at least she still got it in one piece, and he didn't damage during three days of waiting.

 

[Oops:

 

A few minutes ago she asked me "what are you typing up a storm about?"

 

"Ummm... just writing down some notes about the past couple of days." (We have been in some meetings over the past couple of days, so it was an appropriate answer).

 

I better be more careful!!]

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