Leaving the kids with grandma :)

Question for all of you Moms & Dads out there when cruising without your kids:

We will be cruising on Oasis with our toddlers on "vacation" at grandma and grandpas. They do really well there, and usually have a weekend sleepover once a month or every six weeks. I would like to facetime in the mornings and before bed with the kids, but my husband thinks it may give them more anxiety to do that.

What have you done in this situation? Only interested in feedback if you have actually been in this situation.

We (grandparents) usually leave it up to the grandkids to ask to FT. We try to deflect for awhile and then limit it to once a day if really necessary. I think twice a day is way to much.

Enjoy your cruise and let the grandparents handle it. Believe it or not they did just fine raising you, didn't they?

Congrats on your upcoming vacation! We opted to "go dark". The grandparents had the ship emergency number. Our phones went into the safe and we were off the grid. Everyone survived. My kids are now older and when they go to sleep away camp (1 week) there is a policy that parents and children have not contact (unless an emergency of course) just for the very reason you stated above.

You don't say how old your children are, but I will tell you what my daughter did when she cruised last year without her two daughters (ages 9 and 4). The girls stayed with me (Grandma) during the cruise.

My daughter recorded (on my cell phone) messages for each of the girls so they were able to hear her voice anytime they wanted (their dad also recorded his messages.) She also recorded herself singing their bedtime lullabies and I played that for them each night when they went to bed.

She didn't call every day but she face-timed them from one of their ports. They were happy to hear from their parents and it did not make them sad. We did feel that it would be best if she didn't call too often. The girls and I recorded a video of the girls telling their parents all about the special things we did during the vacation. We sent that so they would receive it as soon as they hit their first port.

You know your children best so it's hard to give advice. I do think, though, that you should not call twice a day. It will then be special at the times that you do call. That is my opinion only of course.

Enjoy your cruise.

We have done it in the past, but the kids were a little older pre teens. I found the first time, we emailed them, but they would respond to little issues-non emergency that were happening in their daily lives. It caused us concern that we were not there to help fix things. The second time no contact at all and we had a much more relaxing and peaceful vacation.

Facetiming twice a day is just going to make it harder on the kids. I would text with grandma and see if all is going well, if no one is having issues, I would let them be. If one of the kids needs to talk to Mom and Dad, I would Facetime them once to say hi and that you will be home in a couple of days. If they already to a regular weekend away, they will be fine.

Thanks guys for all the feedback. The main reason I want to FaceTime twice a day is because I will probably miss them :) I know they are in perfectly capable hands with grandma.

Now i see where my husband is coming from. Maybe we will just check in a couple times that week, and my mom can always reach us if she needs us.

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Thanks guys for all the feedback. The main reason I want to FaceTime twice a day is because I will probably miss them :) I know they are in perfectly capable hands with grandma.

 

Now i see where my husband is coming from. Maybe we will just check in a couple times that week, and my mom can always reach us if she needs us.

 

 

 

 

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IMHO, this is the best way to handle it.

Ditto that...the kids will be having a blast with their grandparents....great bonding time for both kids and grandparents. They will contact you if you are needed!

Go, and enjoy your adult time!!!

We left them at all ages, we didn’t contact them at all. When they were babies and toddlers, even if we were gone a week, they reacted like we were gone a day.

My husband and I have cruised three times without our kids. The first time was in 2013 when they were 5 and 6 years old. The last time was in June of 2017. On our first two cruises, which went to Bermuda, we checked in with them once a day while we were in port. On our last Oasis Cruise, we checked in about once a day, usually via Face Time. I think it depends on individual children and their personalities, but my kids liked the contact. My son tends to be highly anxious and knowing that we were OK and that he could “see” us helped alleviate a lot of his worry and concern. We kept the calls very short and light, sharing our day, and letting them share their day with us. My mother-in-law said she used the calls to reassure my son when he talked about missing us.

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Question for all of you Moms & Dads out there when cruising without your kids:

 

We will be cruising on Oasis with our toddlers on "vacation" at grandma and grandpas. They do really well there, and usually have a weekend sleepover once a month or every six weeks. I would like to facetime in the mornings and before bed with the kids, but my husband thinks it may give them more anxiety to do that.

 

What have you done in this situation? Only interested in feedback if you have actually been in this situation.

We fly out Thursday for much needed rest. Have twin boys that are 2.5 years and another son that is 5. My wife and I both have the internet package to keep in touch and to face time. I don’t think FaceTime will create issues unless it is done too much.

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When I read that bit about your husband not wanting you to check-in with the kids..it made me smile. : ) He wants all of your attention. Your kids won't care of remember so maybe pretend your childless for the week? That might be fun but you also might come back with a souviner. Happened to me : )

When I read that bit about your husband not wanting you to check-in with the kids..it made me smile. : ) He wants all of your attention. Your kids won't care of remember so maybe pretend your childless for the week? That might be fun but you also might come back with a souviner. Happened to me : )

We came back with twins after our last cruise. :-)

When I read that bit about your husband not wanting you to check-in with the kids..it made me smile. : ) He wants all of your attention. Your kids won't care of remember so maybe pretend your childless for the week? That might be fun but you also might come back with a souviner. Happened to me : )

Wasnt a cruise, but first night my parents had our son overnight :rolleyes: he got a sister 9 months later.

Again not a cruise but I've been on holiday without the kids and it was harder for me the first time than on them. Like other schools have said they'll be with nanny and grandad so it's a mini holiday for them too :) Txts to Nanny and calls when needed are enough, you'll all have a great time I'm sure :)

On the flipside when I was a newlywed... My MIL wanted us to call her whenever we were at a port. This was 20 years ago, and they weren't on the internet. When we called, they'd tell us things that stressed us out AND we couldn't do anything about. Wish we would have never called!

Thanks guys for all the feedback. The main reason I want to FaceTime twice a day is because I will probably miss them

Bingo, I knew it.

Go and have fun. We had the 5 & 3 YOA the last two weekends for a night. Funny, the first weekend not a problem. The second Friday night total melt down from the 5 yr. The 3 yr brought "big sis" around in a few minutes. Then it was time for ice cream sundaes and movie night. We let them stay up as long as they wanted (11:00 PM) and watch movies in bed.

Hardest thing about your cruise will be getting the kids back into a routine after we (grandparents) spoil them for a week. To bad, not our problem!!

Thanks everyone!! ....and stop scaring me about coming back with a souvenir haha!!! I'm sure it happens often :)

I appreciate the support. You all put my mind at ease. Especially grandmas & grandpas who have been on the other side and chimed in!

The better alternative, from a GP viewpoint, is take the kids and the grandparents. Just saying!!!

We have not had the luxury of taking a vacation without DD because we simply don’t have anyone to leave her with. Grandmas are not interested! But, when DD was younger (less than a year through about 5) I traveled a few times a year for work, about a week or two at a time. As DD got older, she noticed my absences more, and I would end up having a quick chat with her and DH in the morning before work/school, then a FaceTime in the evening where I’d “read” her bedtime stories to her. I think others have given great advice, and that you should take each day as they come, and see what your kids want/need. That is what has worked best for us over the years.

We left the kids 3 years ago with Grandparents. Kids were 13, 10, 6, and 4. We called from each port (4 ports) to say hi and check in. They were fine. Kids had never stayed without us prior. Grandma lives in FL while we are in CT. It was a fun adventure for them. (and us!)

Extremely selfish... why not place them in a kennel if your going to treat them like pets...

Unreal. God put us on this earth to multiply and be fruitful. I guess when you believe kids are like tacos “the fun part was making them” pack them up at grannies house. They will rather be their than in a cruise...

My kids are 45 & 49 and still live at home. That’s why we have kids.

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My kids are 45 & 49 and still live at home. That’s why we have kids.

I thought you were for real and then......

At that age you should be living with them...

You don't say how old your children are, but I will tell you what my daughter did when she cruised last year without her two daughters (ages 9 and 4). The girls stayed with me (Grandma) during the cruise.

 

My daughter recorded (on my cell phone) messages for each of the girls so they were able to hear her voice anytime they wanted (their dad also recorded his messages.) She also recorded herself singing their bedtime lullabies and I played that for them each night when they went to bed.

 

She didn't call every day but she face-timed them from one of their ports. They were happy to hear from their parents and it did not make them sad. We did feel that it would be best if she didn't call too often. The girls and I recorded a video of the girls telling their parents all about the special things we did during the vacation. We sent that so they would receive it as soon as they hit their first port.

 

You know your children best so it's hard to give advice. I do think, though, that you should not call twice a day. It will then be special at the times that you do call. That is my opinion only of course.

Enjoy your cruise.

What a wonderful, helpful and thoughtful response. Your grandchildren are very lucky to have you.

Look into the Marco Polo app. That way you are not tied into reaching them at a particular time

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