CourtneyLovesCruising Posted January 11, 2012 #51 Share Posted January 11, 2012 I would be hiring a PI for the time away and toss out the bed when I get home. Been there and the kids never saw mom again...not my choice hers.. Sux to be him at the moment. I know it stings at first. The kids are young enough they won't think much. Make the best of it! Glad you stood up to her.BTW I think if he was a wife beater all of the friends might have known something??? My wife was the beater! bleh.. sorry to hear of your experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
e150club Posted January 11, 2012 #52 Share Posted January 11, 2012 OP. Is she a CC member? On your roll call ? That would be more drama. I hope her husband and kids have a great time with all of your group. Enjoy! your going on a cruise. Let her make her own bed and cook and clean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
INCHARGE Posted January 11, 2012 #53 Share Posted January 11, 2012 totally. So.. the lady is looking to get away from her marriage and she's stuck in a commitment in a group cruise with a group that favors her soon to be X. She tries make the situation work by moving her cabin away from the group causing the group to get confrontational. Somethings are better left unsaid, sometimes less is more. Perhaps if you would have just reserved judgement, handled your own business and let them handle theirs.. then there wouldn't be so much chaos? The husband probably already knows. Everyone has to butt out of this. Do exactly what you would have done if you had never found out, which is to enjoy your families. What will you do if the husband starts asking you all questions about what you know? Are you going to tell him? Don't get caught up in this mess. Stay neutral, and don't side with either. The best advice is no advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulMedik Posted January 11, 2012 #54 Share Posted January 11, 2012 The husband probably already knows. Everyone has to butt out of this. Do exactly what you would have done if you had never found out, which is to enjoy your families. What will you do if the husband starts asking you all questions about what you know? Are you going to tell him? Don't get caught up in this mess. Stay neutral, and don't side with either. The best advice is no advice. INCHARGE, Very good advice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angelkisses Posted January 11, 2012 #55 Share Posted January 11, 2012 so is she a milf? Go canada! seriously??????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
INCHARGE Posted January 11, 2012 #56 Share Posted January 11, 2012 INCHARGE, Very good advice! I woke back up, thinking the same thing. "Oh heck, somebody is gonna get me for that line". Giving advice not to give advice. I was right, you got me. :D But I was saying not to get caught up in their marriage problems. People will try to pull others into marriage disputes, but it is not a good idea to side. This can become a bigger mess if they stay involved. Best thing is to let them work it out. Now, I am done giving advice. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tef43 Posted January 11, 2012 #57 Share Posted January 11, 2012 People really need to learn to mind their own business. It's only drama if YOU make it drama. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
golfadj Posted January 11, 2012 #58 Share Posted January 11, 2012 The return of peyton place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drazil65 Posted January 11, 2012 #59 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Wow...so how does husband #4 (the friend and employee of boss having affair with wife of family #2) look at his boss everyday knowing all this is going on? He is still friends with this guy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SE NC Posted January 11, 2012 #60 Share Posted January 11, 2012 People really need to learn to mind their own business. It's only drama if YOU make it drama. Ohhhhh, come on now....you know you love a good soap opera!:D:D:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blizzrd Posted January 11, 2012 #61 Share Posted January 11, 2012 I want more details!! Does the Husband now know? How can he go like that knowing that they're gonna screw like rabbits while they're alone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blizzardlane Posted January 11, 2012 #62 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Ok, wait, now the Boyfriend of Wife #2 is the boss of Husband #4? So was Wife #4 in on the confrontation with Wife #2? I need a scorecard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulMedik Posted January 11, 2012 #63 Share Posted January 11, 2012 I woke back up, thinking the same thing. "Oh heck, somebody is gonna get me for that line". Giving advice not to give advice. I was right, you got me. :D But I was saying not to get caught up in their marriage problems. People will try to pull others into marriage disputes, but it is not a good idea to side. This can become a bigger mess if they stay involved. Best thing is to let them work it out. Now, I am done giving advice. :D INCHARGE, Actually I really did agree with your advice. I should have opted to say 'I agree with your recomendations.' Essentially you were saying they should go on their vacation, enjoy themselves, and mind their own business. We are both applying critical thinking to emotions and morals; the three don't mix well. ;) People are going to do what they're going to do and no amount of logic will prevent it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikimouse Posted January 11, 2012 #64 Share Posted January 11, 2012 totally. So.. the lady is looking to get away from her marriage and she's stuck in a commitment in a group cruise with a group that favors her soon to be X. She tries make the situation work by moving her cabin away from the group causing the group to get confrontational. Somethings are better left unsaid, sometimes less is more. Perhaps if you would have just reserved judgement, handled your own business and let them handle theirs.. then there wouldn't be so much chaos? thats kinda what I was thinking when I read it. the op didnt want her to come and everyone confronted her so she lost alot of money and her husband is now takeing the kids. I think the issue was with the boyfriend booking a cabin, as noone minded when it was just the woman going alone without her husband. so would it have all been ok if the woman had ended her marriage first and then said im bringing my new partner? who knows. sounds like everyone was friends with the husband and probably wouldnt have wanted to cruise with her anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikimouse Posted January 11, 2012 #65 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Ok, wait, now the Boyfriend of Wife #2 is the boss of Husband #4? So was Wife #4 in on the confrontation with Wife #2? I need a scorecard. same here. confused.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Room Service! Posted January 11, 2012 #66 Share Posted January 11, 2012 No matter who's at fault, it's still selfish and awkward for the wife to bring her boyfriend on a cruise with her friends and KIDS! She should have cancelled in the beginning. So what if her kids are disappointed (said sarcastically). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach410 Posted January 11, 2012 #67 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Wow!! Poor husband #2, I hope in can enjoy himself after all that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caljencruisers Posted January 11, 2012 #68 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Of course, you have no idea what occurred in the family prior to when she took the actions that you relate. For all you know, her husband could be a wife-beating, child-abusing jerk and the new man is who finally gave her the self-confidence and support to confront him and end the marriage. As hard as it is to do, the best thing for the rest of you is to MYOB and refuse to speak about the situation with either of the parties or each other (gossip never helped anyone and those children deserve a safe place where people are not talking about their parents and giving them "sympathy" stares.) I am a family law attorney and I can tell you, I see these kind of situations all the time, and there really are two sides to each story. Because you don't know both sides, it is unfair to take sides. Just saying. Yes, and that is why you divorce a wife-beating, child-abusing jerk. You don't go cheating around behind his back. If her husband was an a hole, she should've moved out, taken her kids, etc. That way the kids understand why she is doing what she is doing. She doesn't sound too smart to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PAPERBKWRITER Posted January 11, 2012 #69 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Yeah, we're all gonna do our best to make sure the kids have a great time. Sounds like mom is going to have a great time too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texaslandshark Posted January 11, 2012 #70 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Am I the only one who can't believe what people throw onto the electronic street?:confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debster11 Posted January 11, 2012 #71 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Am I the only one who can't believe what people throw onto the electronic street?:confused: Well I look at it this way. The OP isn't using her real name, she isn't listing the parites involved by name and Toronto is a big city. She is venting and that is all. I feel bad for husband #2. I hope they have a good cruise. JMHO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SmileEh Posted January 11, 2012 #72 Share Posted January 11, 2012 wow sounds like she has it set up pretty good to have some free "quality time" with bf while everyone else is cruising!:eek: I was thinking the exact same thing :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
halos Posted January 11, 2012 #73 Share Posted January 11, 2012 OK - four days 'till we cruise, but just had vent this one. Story: Four families got together last April to book our cruise. Family one is mom, dad and three kids; family two is mom, dad and two kids; family three is mom, dad and one kid; and family four is husband and wife...no kids. We find out a couple months ago that the mom in family two is having an affair. She is sneaking around, and not being all that careful - and we all know about it. Then, we find out that the person she having an affair with is the boss and friend of the husband of family four. Everyone is freaking out, that this will kill the trip. THEN, we find out that she "convinces" her husband not to come on the cruise - followed shortly by her new boyfriend booking a cabin of his own. We are all livid. THEN, we find out that she has paid for a very expensive upgrade to move to the cabin next to the boyfriend on deck 11 (and away from us on deck 2). We are beside ourselves with anger. She has ruined the group. At the 11th (like, yesterday) hour, some of us confront her, explaining how horrible she has been to her husband and kids, and that the right thing would be for her husband to go in her place. To our amazement, and absolute shock, she cancels herself, books her husband in her place, and the boyfriend subsequently cancels. Lots of money lost all around, but safe to say that we are all happier. Can't believe how much this groupl has gone through since we started planning this trip. Of course her changes affect so many other things (airfare, hotels, car, Disney, etc.), we are now scrambling to get things organized to leave. WHEWWWWW! Enjoy that. :eek: wow. I hate how this kinda' crap affects so many other people. . Every decision made or action taken by any individual always has some effect outside of themselves. That is pretty much physics...Butterfly effect or whatever you want to call it. It's only when people aren't conscious of or don't take responsibility for the affects their actions have on others that there is a problem....and that happens most of the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunshine252 Posted January 11, 2012 #74 Share Posted January 11, 2012 OP: INCHARGE is right... stay neutral and try not to get involved & try to help H2 & kids enjoy this relaxing time together. When he finds out that all of his "friends" knew what was really going on & left him out to dry (if he doesn't already know what's going on), he's going to feel betrayed & be rather miffed for a while. Y'all need some fun before this all hits the fan! LOL :D ETA: Which is not to say that y'all should be the ones to tell him. He'll be miffed then, too. LOL I've watched this scene play out too many times plus my DH was in a very similar situation with his first wife. Noone comes out of this unscathed... :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidsgoneletscruise Posted January 11, 2012 #75 Share Posted January 11, 2012 We find out a couple months ago that the mom in family two is having an affair. She is sneaking around, and not being all that careful - and we all know about it. Then, we find out that the person she having an affair with is the boss and friend of the husband of family four. Everyone is freaking out, that this will kill the trip. THEN, we find out that she "convinces" her husband not to come on the cruise - followed shortly by her new boyfriend booking a cabin of his own. We are all livid. THEN, we find out that she has paid for a very expensive upgrade to move to the cabin next to the boyfriend on deck 11 (and away from us on deck 2). We are beside ourselves with anger. She has ruined the group. At the 11th (like, yesterday) hour, some of us confront her, explaining how horrible she has been to her husband and kids, and that the right thing would be for her husband to go in her place. To our amazement, and absolute shock, she cancels herself, books her husband in her place, and the boyfriend subsequently cancels. Lots of money lost all around, but safe to say that we are all happier. Can't believe how much this groupl has gone through since we started planning this trip. Of course her changes affect so many other things (airfare, hotels, car, Disney, etc.), we are now scrambling to get things organized to leave. WHEWWWWW! :eek::eek::eek: Wow you so have me beat for family drama! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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