CodyC815 Posted May 20, 2013 #1 Share Posted May 20, 2013 I'm creating a comic series as a project for a design class, and I decided to do it about the funniest (or stupidest) things heard or said on a cruise. The main one that comes to mind is the woman calling customer service as soon as she boarded because she paid for an oceanview cabin and all she could see is the parking lot. Does anyone else remember any funny moments from their cruise or something a cruise director might have mentioned that would be worth adding to my series? Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aquahound Posted May 20, 2013 #2 Share Posted May 20, 2013 When we were anchoring in Belize, the ship stirred up the bottom a little, creating a brown cloud in the water around the ship. Later in the cruise, at the senior officer Q&A, a woman asked the Captain why he would dump sewage so close to shore. His response was classic. He said, "Yeah, that reminds me. I really need for you passengers to cut down on your caffeine and fiber." What was better, he never did explain what it really was. The look on her face was priceless. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom.to.2 Posted May 20, 2013 #3 Share Posted May 20, 2013 you may find something useful here: http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1658604&highlight=craziest+heard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tneah Posted May 20, 2013 #4 Share Posted May 20, 2013 I'm creating a comic series as a project for a design class, and I decided to do it about the funniest (or stupidest) things heard or said on a cruise. The main one that comes to mind is the woman calling customer service as soon as she boarded because she paid for an oceanview cabin and all she could see is the parking lot. Does anyone else remember any funny moments from their cruise or something a cruise director might have mentioned that would be worth adding to my series? Thanks! This must be a running joke the staff telll cruisers. I heard this from a bartender on the Oasis 3 weeks ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aurelius180 Posted May 20, 2013 #5 Share Posted May 20, 2013 This story pops up every once in a while: Crewmember confessions: stupid cruise questions revealed http://www.foxnews.com/travel/2013/05/10/crewmember-confessions-real-stupid-cruise-questions/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShakyBeef Posted May 20, 2013 #6 Share Posted May 20, 2013 I don't know if this falls into the category of what you are looking for, but there are some really cute, cruise-related 'kids say the darndest things' stories in this old thread... http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1304284 The two that I still sometimes remember and chuckle over years later are post # 3 about the kiddie pool, and the one about the 'chocolate man'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wallyworld583 Posted May 20, 2013 #7 Share Posted May 20, 2013 On a 10 day Princess, which tends to be an older crowd (think lots of 'snow' on the roof). Sitting in the theatre close to show time, a couple walks in and she says 'look at all these people. How are we ever going to find them?' He replies, with a straight face, 'oh, just look for the white haired couple.' Not sure if he was joking or not but I almost spilled my drink laughing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahecht Posted May 20, 2013 #8 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Joff Eaton on Independence of the Seas did a whole bit on this during the farewell show. Questions included: "Does the crew live onboard?" "Does the ship generate it's own electricity?" "Is the water in the toilets seawater?" "Does the ship dock in the center of town?" "Is the fish of the day caught by the crew each morning?" "How far above sea level are we?" "Are there two sittings for the safety drill?" "Can I film the ship leaving port from the dock?" "What do you do with the ice sculptures after they have melted?" "Is the island completely surrounded by water?" "How do I know which pictures in the photo gallery are ours?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
looking4info Posted May 20, 2013 #9 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Joff Eaton on Independence of the Seas did a whole bit on this during the farewell show. Questions included: "Does the crew live onboard?" "Does the ship generate it's own electricity?" "Is the water in the toilets seawater?" "Does the ship dock in the center of town?" "Is the fish of the day caught by the crew each morning?" "How far above sea level are we?" "Are there two sittings for the safety drill?" "Can I film the ship leaving port from the dock?" "What do you do with the ice sculptures after they have melted?" "Is the island completely surrounded by water?" "How do I know which pictures in the photo gallery are ours?" Canned bit used by almost all cruise directors on almost all cruise lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luvbrady Posted May 20, 2013 #10 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Heard this one from a cruise director: CD gets a call from guest services after a day on Cozumel. A guest is trying to reheat a piece of pizza in their cabin but the microwave won't work. The head of hotel services was on his way to assist the guest asked if the CD want to come along. Joined by the captain and head of engineering they confirmed what they figured the problem was. The guests were attempting to reheat the pizza in the safe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Recruit Posted May 20, 2013 #11 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Joff Eaton on Independence of the Seas did a whole bit on this during the farewell show. Questions included: "Does the crew live onboard?" "Does the ship generate it's own electricity?" "Is the water in the toilets seawater?" "Does the ship dock in the center of town?" "Is the fish of the day caught by the crew each morning?" "How far above sea level are we?" "Are there two sittings for the safety drill?" "Can I film the ship leaving port from the dock?" "What do you do with the ice sculptures after they have melted?" "Is the island completely surrounded by water?" "How do I know which pictures in the photo gallery are ours?" Adding to those: "Do these stairs go up or down?" "Does the elevator go to the front of the ship?" And my all time favorite from a travel agent no less... "Why aren't there any ships sailing out of Atlanta?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ehfl Posted May 20, 2013 #12 Share Posted May 20, 2013 We were lounging on the upper deck by the railing next to two older women. They were commenting on how nice the ocean view was. One got up for a bit, and came running back a minute later saying how she had been to the other side of the ship, and saw the same ocean view. "I had no idea we would be *completely* surrounded by water," she said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kruzgal Posted May 20, 2013 #13 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Sailing in to Venice I overheard one woman ask another if their tour of Venice that day would be by coach(bus) - not sure how that would work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awhcruiser Posted May 20, 2013 #14 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Yup! Canned bit used by almost all cruise directors on almost all cruise lines. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hobiecat01 Posted May 20, 2013 #15 Share Posted May 20, 2013 Several years ago DW and I were on a cruise on what was then the largest cruise ship in the world, the Grand Princess. The Captain held a Q&A session one evening and was answering all types of questions about the ship when someone asked, "Can this ship go through the Panama Canal?" He thought for a second and then said, "Once." Yes, the ship is too wide for the canal which is 110 ft wide. The Grand Princess is 118 ft wide. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calico Jack Sparrow Posted May 20, 2013 #16 Share Posted May 20, 2013 What time is the midnight buffet? If I miss the ship, can I still get on? Why is the boat leaving without us? Ba-dump-dump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
higgib Posted May 20, 2013 #17 Share Posted May 20, 2013 The two stories that spring to mind are about preparing to disembark at the end of the cruise. In the first one, a couple on their first cruise are enjoying drinks in a bar on the last night. She says to her DH, 'We need to put our cases out tonight before we go to bed.' He replies 'That's ok, you finish your drink. I'll go back and do it now'. She returned to the cabin shortly after, saw the cases outside and went to bed. Next morning she opened the wardrobe and saw everything still inside. When she asked her DH, he replied she had only told him to put the cases outside, not to pack them. They had to get large bin bags from their steward to carry their stuff off the ship, and then pack their cases in the terminal before they went through customs. In the second story, a family are cruising, and the husband tells his wife that as he is tired, he will go back to the cabin and pack their cases, and she should take the kids to the show and come back later. Some time later the wife and kids go back to the cabin to find the husband sitting on the floor outside wrapped in a towel. He says he packed the cases, then remembered that he wanted to pack the clothes he was wearing. He stripped off and packed the clothes, then thought he would just quickly put the bags outside. Unfortunately the ship lurched and the door swung shut, trapping him outside. He had noticed a housekeeping trolley further up the corridor and taken a towel from it, and then had to wait for his family to return before he could get back into the cabin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cricket2010 Posted May 20, 2013 #18 Share Posted May 20, 2013 I witnessed this first hand on the 5/12 Freedom sailing: "Where are the hallways to get to our rooms?" Note, it was about 10 minutes before the 1:00pm time for the rooms to be available. The stateroom attendant standing by the wall/door advised that it was not time yet and that the door would open at 1:00pm. (There was a large sign on the closed door stating that staterooms would not be ready until 1:00pm.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jchiefs13 Posted May 21, 2013 #19 Share Posted May 21, 2013 I still get a chuckle out of the people who are standing at a landing debating which side their cabin is on... on day 5 or 6. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brownsfan1 Posted May 21, 2013 #20 Share Posted May 21, 2013 A couple of years ago at the blackjack table on the Oasis during a day at Sea, a gentleman who had been at the table for most of the afternoon and evening , stood up, looked at the dealer and asked in all seriousness, " where can I get a cab ? " needless to say the entire table cracked up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eggroll Posted May 21, 2013 #21 Share Posted May 21, 2013 This story pops up every once in a while: Crewmember confessions: stupid cruise questions revealed http://www.foxnews.com/travel/2013/05/10/crewmember-confessions-real-stupid-cruise-questions/ this was good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruiselife4me Posted May 21, 2013 #22 Share Posted May 21, 2013 Loved this one: is the water in the toilets fresh? Why..do you plan on drinking it?? Also, I made a complete gaffe trying to make my ice cream cone at Sprinkles. I THOUGHT my friend and I were alone. The ice cream was coming out too fast and making a mess. I said, " This is ____ up right here" I turned around and there were two elderly (hopefully hard of hearing) women standing there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retiredgram Posted May 21, 2013 #23 Share Posted May 21, 2013 I still get a chuckle out of the people who are standing at a landing debating which side their cabin is on... on day 5 or 6. I was hoping no one noticed.:confused::p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandytxtx Posted May 21, 2013 #24 Share Posted May 21, 2013 On our first cruise , ( back in the dark ages ), we were going though the buffe line. There was someone there to take your plate and set you. When he reached for my DH plate, my Hubby turned and said "heck no, go fix your own plate". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stowaway2k Posted May 21, 2013 #25 Share Posted May 21, 2013 an old favorite: Passenger to officer: "How far from land are we?" Officer to passenger: "Two miles. Straight down." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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