Sitting with strangers in the MDR

[cbr663]

Some people don't like their table mates, others don 't like the MDR experience, others prefer speciality dining, others prefer dining in ports, others prefer a romantic dinner on their balconies, others prefer a dinner option in the Lido, others just sleep through meal times...there are many reasons why people just don't want to dine in the MDR.

[srlafleur]

I didn't realize that!

 

I also do have a question about ATD (we were last on RC, Allure of the Seas) and we seemed to be seated with the same server even though we showed up at different times of the evening. Was that because of room number? Were we 'technically' assigned to a server even though we came at any time? Because ours wasn't very friendly. I miss getting to know and getting known by the same people in the dining room.

 

While our experience hasn't been on Allure of the Seas, specifically, I did notice that on our last cruise we were usually seated in approximately the same area each night, without asking. Well, actually, the first night we asked to be near the windows, but subsequently we didn't have to ask. I'm positive you can request a different area, just as you can request to be seated in the same area as previously, if you wish. Of course, the more specific your request (table for a specific number, certain location, etc.), the more likely you are to have to wait a bit. But, seriously, I don't think I've ever had to wait longer than a few minutes, and certainly never as long as the wait at some land-based restaurants.

[Husky61]

One of the points of travel is to have new experiences. Having dinner with people one has never met before certainly qualifies as a new experience. Too often people say "I don't cruise to make friends" - apparently explaining their reluctance to interact with previous "strangers".

 

Having dinner with "strangers" may or may not result in making new friends: no problem--- but avoiding interaction with those "strangers" pretty well guarantees that you will not make new friends.

 

Some people don't care if they make new friends on a cruise.

[cbr663]

Some people don't care if they make new friends on a cruise.

 

So true, and some other people don't want to make any new friends. And guess what? There's nothing wrong with that.

[Husky61]

So true, and some other people don't want to make any new friends. And guess what? There's nothing wrong with that.

 

I agree.:)

[CowPrincess]

One of the points of travel is to have new experiences. Having dinner with people one has never met before certainly qualifies as a new experience. Too often people say "I don't cruise to make friends" - apparently explaining their reluctance to interact with previous "strangers".

 

Having dinner with "strangers" may or may not result in making new friends: no problem--- but avoiding interaction with those "strangers" pretty well guarantees that you will not make new friends.

 

You and I have agreed on this before :D For us, part of our cruise enjoyment is sharing time with our dinner companions. Some of the people we have met have truly turned into friends, though that is not the reason we dine with others. We dine with others to learn about other people, other viewpoints, other parts of the world. To change up our normal routine.

 

Some people don't care if they make new friends on a cruise.

 

And no one is going to force them.

 

There are lots of dining choices available; in my experience no one is forced into a dining situation they can't tolerate. If you don't want fixed dining with others, there is anytime dining, the buffet, specialty restaurants, room service.....

[Husky61]

And no one is going to force them.

 

There are lots of dining choices available; in my experience no one is forced into a dining situation they can't tolerate. If you don't want fixed dining with others, there is anytime dining, the buffet, specialty restaurants, room service.....

 

I understand what you are saying. Our personal choice is to dine where we want, when we want, and with just the two of us. We don't care about making friends on a cruise ship.:)

[CraftyEC]

To return to the original post, all these subsequent posts have confirmed that different people wish to dine in different patterns: some like traditional fixed dining with the same companions, others like to eat at a set time with just their partner. Some people like to take 'pot luck' and eat at shared tables every evening, with different dining companions, while some eat at a time of their choosing with just their partner. Some partake of meals in other venues or in their state rooms.

 

The OP asked if it was felt that the dining pattern should be changed. I'm sure that many would agree that it shouldn't, as it offers a huge amount of flexibility for passengers to choose their dining time, place and companions.

 

So, NO, I don't think things should be changed.

[Raxter54]

To return to the original post, all these subsequent posts have confirmed that different people wish to dine in different patterns: some like traditional fixed dining with the same companions, others like to eat at a set time with just their partner. Some people like to take 'pot luck' and eat at shared tables every evening, with different dining companions, while some eat at a time of their choosing with just their partner. Some partake of meals in other venues or in their state rooms.

 

The OP asked if it was felt that the dining pattern should be changed. I'm sure that many would agree that it shouldn't, as it offers a huge amount of flexibility for passengers to choose their dining time, place and companions.

 

So, NO, I don't think things should be changed.

 

Well said. Couldn't agree more....

[Rosemerseyside]

You and I have agreed on this before :D For us, part of our cruise enjoyment is sharing time with our dinner companions. Some of the people we have met have truly turned into friends, though that is not the reason we dine with others. We dine with others to learn about other people, other viewpoints, other parts of the world. To change up our normal routine.

 

 

 

And no one is going to force them.

 

There are lots of dining choices available; in my experience no one is forced into a dining situation they can't tolerate. If you don't want fixed dining with others, there is anytime dining, the buffet, specialty restaurants, room service.....

 

I'm not anti social, but I'm not very confident with people I don't know, so to have to share a table with strangers makes it very uncomfortable for me. I love the MDR, so why are some people saying I should choose the buffet or room service, just because I don't want to sit with 6 people I don't know?!

[Husky61]

I'm not anti social, but I'm not very confident with people I don't know, so to have to share a table with strangers makes it very uncomfortable for me. I love the MDR, so why are some people saying I should choose the buffet or room service, just because I don't want to sit with 6 people I don't know?!

 

They say that because they are the self-appointed experts and if you don't conform to their desires, you should stand in the corner.;)

[Cruisin' Chick]

I'm not anti social, but I'm not very confident with people I don't know, so to have to share a table with strangers makes it very uncomfortable for me. I love the MDR, so why are some people saying I should choose the buffet or room service, just because I don't want to sit with 6 people I don't know?!

 

The poster you just quoted did include "anytime dining" (which is the name of the flexible dining on Princess). He/she wasn't telling you not to eat in the MDR.

[navybankerteacher]

Some people don't care if they make new friends on a cruise.

 

It's not a matter of trying to make new friends (as a number of posters seem to feel) - rather it is a willingness to meet other people, spend a little time with them, possibly learn something from being exposed to people other than the ones you live with.

 

To each his own - just as many people seem to want not to interact with strangers, I find such interaction part of the pleasure of cruising ---- so please do not dismiss it as trying to make new friends.

[ducklite]

It's not a matter of trying to make new friends (as a number of posters seem to feel) - rather it is a willingness to meet other people, spend a little time with them, possibly learn something from being exposed to people other than the ones you live with.

 

 

 

To each his own - just as many people seem to want not to interact with strangers, I find such interaction part of the pleasure of cruising ---- so please do not dismiss it as trying to make new friends.

 

 

Maybe you live in a bubble. I work in sales and entertain customers over meals as part of my job. I am lucky to have dinner alone with my husband a handful of times a month. Out of 150 meals in a given month, I eat 50 with customers, 50 alone, 40 with friends/family, and maybe 10 alone with my husband. Today is no exception. I am getting ready to leave soon for morning coffee with a customer. I have a training lunch with colleagues. My husband is working tonight (he has a major code release) so I'll have dinner by myself. Now do you understand why some people would prefer to only eat with their spouse when they have the chance?

[navybankerteacher]

Maybe you live in a bubble. I work in sales and entertain customers over meals as part of my job. I am lucky to have dinner alone with my husband a handful of times a month. Out of 150 meals in a given month, I eat 50 with customers, 50 alone, 40 with friends/family, and maybe 10 alone with my husband. Today is no exception. I am getting ready to leave soon for morning coffee with a customer. I have a training lunch with colleagues. My husband is working tonight (he has a major code release) so I'll have dinner by myself. Now do you understand why some people would prefer to only eat with their spouse when they have the chance?

 

Please - it is not all about you. I have no issue with your not liking to join others at dinner. I have no problem with people wanting to eat alone. I hope you enjoy dining however you wish with whoever you wish.

 

I do not understand why you think I might live in a bubble simply because I enjoy meeting other people, and interacting with them, as a part of my vacation experience. Perhaps if you tried it as part of a non-work related social exercise you might enjoy the experience - but if you do not want to that is fine - cruise lines give you that option, and I have no wish to take it away from you.

 

I have responded to a post which expressed the wish that the traditional dining option, which I happen to enjoy, be done away with.

[ducklite]

Please - it is not all about you. I have no issue with your not liking to join others at dinner. I have no problem with people wanting to eat alone. I hope you enjoy dining however you wish with whoever you wish.

 

 

 

I do not understand why you think I might live in a bubble simply because I enjoy meeting other people, and interacting with them, as a part of my vacation experience. Perhaps if you tried it as part of a non-work related social exercise you might enjoy the experience - but if you do not want to that is fine - cruise lines give you that option, and I have no wish to take it away from you.

 

 

 

I have responded to a post which expressed the wish that the traditional dining option, which I happen to enjoy, be done away with.

 

 

Maybe you missed the part where I said 40 are with family or friends. I probably eat with friends far more than the average person does. But random strangers one is seated with in an MDR are not friends, a fact that some people seem to have a hard time grasping.

 

With open seating you can still sit with strangers, just ask to be seated at a large table with others. We do this some nights, but not all. Also, the ships we sail on never expect you to sit with others at breakfast or lunch, which to me is an absurd thing that traditional dining dictates.

[trev71]

I have never had a problem with any of our table mates. I guess if you are not happy you can be asked to move

[navybankerteacher]

Maybe you missed the part where I said 40 are with family or friends. I probably eat with friends far more than the average person does. But random strangers one is seated with in an MDR are not friends, a fact that some people seem to have a hard time grasping.

 

With open seating you can still sit with strangers, just ask to be seated at a large table with others. We do this some nights, but not all. Also, the ships we sail on never expect you to sit with others at breakfast or lunch, which to me is an absurd thing that traditional dining dictates.

 

Traditional dining has nothing to do with breakfast or lunch - the assigned dining concept ONLY applies at dinner on any ship/line I've experienced: Carnival, Celebrity, Cunard, HAL, Orient, NCL, Princess, or Royal Caribbean. Perhaps if you understood what traditional dining involved you would not think there was something so absurd about it.

[cbr663]

To the OP, yes, we feel the same way. Luckily, change is occurring and has been for some time now. Cruise lines started introducing smaller tables to accommodate those who did not wish to dine at larger tables with different people. We then saw the introduction of flexible dining options in the dining rooms that allowed passengers even more options to dine at a time that was convenient to them and not the cruise line.

 

Fast forward and most cruise lines have introduced specialty dining restaurants. Some have additional charges, some don't, but most do not require passengers that passengers share a table. There is little denying that specialty dining has been a success for the cruise industry.

 

The tide has now turned once again with NCL and RCCL introducing ships that do not have a main dining room at all. So the change has already occurred. I am expecting that more and more cruise lines will soon begin eliminating the main dining room concept all together with MDR dining being reserved for smaller, niche lines.

 

Some passengers will have a hard time embracing this change, and that is understandable. Traditional dining is something that they look forward to and enjoy and I have read that many will cease cruising should the MDR be totally eliminated. That is most unfortunate.

[swedish weave]

Maybe you live in a bubble. I work in sales and entertain customers over meals as part of my job. I am lucky to have dinner alone with my husband a handful of times a month. Out of 150 meals in a given month, I eat 50 with customers, 50 alone, 40 with friends/family, and maybe 10 alone with my husband. Today is no exception. I am getting ready to leave soon for morning coffee with a customer. I have a training lunch with colleagues. My husband is working tonight (he has a major code release) so I'll have dinner by myself. Now do you understand why some people would prefer to only eat with their spouse when they have the chance?

 

I can see the need to "get away". 150 meals a month is 5 per day, and that would become hard to deal with.

[iancal]

I hear you ducklite! That was my life when I was working. A table for two was wonderful. It is also when we decided to skip most formal nights in the MDR.

 

Now that we are retired we have a different attitude to it.

[ducklite]

I can see the need to "get away". 150 meals a month is 5 per day, and that would become hard to deal with.

 

 

LOl--you got me. I need to stop posting before my first cup of coffee kicks in. 90 meals a month, 30 with customers (for example next Monday I have breakfast, lunch, and dinner meetings), 20-30 with friends, 10-20 solo, and 10 with my husband.

[slidergirl]

I think some who are criticizing those who want options possibly did not read the OP's posting correctly. Or, maybe I am reading into it. But, I saw it as having cruised on a line that only offered the decades-old tradition of only eating at a specific time, at a specific table, with specific people. I didn't read it as doing away with traditional, but a decision to cruise with a ship that only offered traditional or eat at the Lido or in your room, or a decision to cruise with a ship that offered other options in the MDR setting.

I think ships that only offer traditional seating will die away and will have to go into offering an array of options (which WILL include traditional for the ones that must have regimented meal times with the same people every night;) ).

 

The offering of dinner options gave me the incentive to start cruising. I had no desire to sit (as a solo traveler) with a group and get grilled on why I'm alone and then get the "you sure are brave to go it alone" or "we have an extra space we're trying to fill on our tour, want to join because it will save us from eating the unfilled seat costs"…

It has nothing to do wanting to travel in a cocoon, away from strangers. It's a desire to have OPTIONS….Apparently, some can't understand that and deem us all social isolationists. Sad….

[JTBCruiser]

DW and I had MTD version on NCL Pride of America and did the seating for 2 for the entire cruise and didn't feel we missed out by not having table mates. We recently were on Jewel of the Seas, MTD again and ended up at a table of 8. After the first night together, we all hit it off and agreed to be dinner mates the rest of the cruise. We did go to a few shows with two of the couples but that was about it, we never saw each other except during dinner. DW and I value our time and just want to be away together. We are not there looking for long term friendships and have no issues of politely requesting another table on the following night if the seat mates aren't compatible. I figure regardless of our differences we all have at least one thing in common, we love going on cruises.

[GalCruzer]

So if you book traditional dining you cannot just get a table for two?