Table Mates: The Good, The Bad and the Meh..

[OzKiwiJJ]

On our last cruise we turned up on the first night to find we were at a 10 top at our requested 8:30pm sitting. We were the first to arrive so sat at one end of the oval table. A woman joined us and sat next to DH. No-one else turned up at that point. We ordered our meal and started trying to chat to her, asking if she was cruising solo. No, she was cruising with a friend. She was fairly quiet but did make an effort to chat occasionally. As we were finishing our main course, around 9:30pm, a guy arrived dressed in scruffy shorts and a tshirt and very drunk. He sat next to me.

 

Our waiter gave him a menu, gave the rest of us the dessert menus, then suggested that the guy might like the beef sliders. The woman declined dessert and left the table quite quickly. The guy was very chatty, including while he was eating which lead to him spraying food all over the table right in front of me. Ugh! It turned out that he was the friend of the woman, and they had had a major fight just before dinner, after sharing "the bottle of champagne that I bought her, all girls like champagne, right?", and then moving on to cocktails and beers. :eek:

 

After bolting his sliders he also left. I said to DH that I hoped they sorted things out otherwise the rest of the cruise dinners could be awkward but, luckily, they never came back to the MDR. Two couples, sisters and their husbands, joined us the next night. English was their second language but we managed to have good conversations on the nights they were there. Some nights we dined alone on the 10 top, although that never bothered us. All-in-all we enjoyed our evening meals after that awkward first night.

[kiwigirl@nz]

I am a travel agent and I booked my cruise. I was able to see the booking number of our table mates. I am 32 my bf is 43. Our table mates are 25 and 23. I can't wait to see what this is like.

 

Lucky

[Slugsta]

We were assigned a table with a Scottish couple, a British couple, a pair of Australians and a couple of Yanks (that's us).

 

Don't you mean '2 British couples'? :confused:

 

We usually have a big table, even with YTD (or the equivalent). We have not made life-long friends but have had many good meals with lots of laughs. Even people who have seemed a little difficult at first meeting have turned out to be OK when they have relaxed a bit. For us, this is one of the joys of cruising :)

[lahlah57]

We love a table of 8! My DH and I love talking to people who love to travel like we do!

We do make a point to announce to our fellow diners if we are 15 minutes late start without us.

On 1 cruise we failed to make this announcement and the couple that we tablemated with caught us at the bar with another couple and they felt the need to tell us that they wished that we would have told them we would not make it.......REALLY?! That made for an uncomfortable dining experience for the rest of the cruise. They payed us back by not showing up for dinner......like we cared!!! There were 2 other couples that we shared the table with anyways! Weird:eek:

Our policy is to announce to everyone our 15 minute rule! Sheesh......I felt like I committed tablemate adultery....LOL!

[SuiteTraveler]

They want to be vegans that is fine for them but why do they need to criticize the choices others make?

 

EXACTLY! I don't mind someone being vegan, but to self-righteously proclaim it on a nightly basis and make fun of the menu is beyond rude. I would have spoken up and told them that I would appreciate it if they would keep their opinions about the food to themselves. I don't criticize their food choices, why should they criticize mine?

[lahlah57]

Explaining why you don't wish to have bread.....REALLY?!

[SuiteTraveler]

My brother-in-law and his wife were not enjoyable as table mates. They would order 3 entrees every dinner. The entrees were served one at a time so the rest of us had to wait while they ate and ate. It made dinners last forever. After a few nights, we excused ourselves when we finished our entree and went on to our evening plans. We missed deserts but we were able to enjoy the evenings

 

Did your BIL and his wife not notice at the first dinner that they were holding up the entire table? Are they always so self-absorbed? I'm afraid I would have had to say something to them about this inconsiderate behavior.

[cb at sea]

We get along with almost anyone....so far, we've never had "bad" tablemates. I think, for the folks who never get "good tablemates....it's not the tablemates, but it's YOU!

 

I find that folks on vacation are having a good time, and are quite easy to get along with.

[CorrieCJ]

On our honeymoon, my husband and I were seated at a 4-top with one of the ship's officers and his mom -- since the officer's mom was on board, he had been given leave to eat in the passenger dining room. The mom was a very proper British woman who had very interesting stories, and the officer gave us a lot of inside information on this ship... it was fascinating. Of course I don;t remember any of it :) He also got my husband a tour of the bridge. This was in 1997, not sure it would be possible now.

 

On another cruise, we were seated with 3 couples who all knew each other. They were around our age but they were obsessed with the NCAA basketball which was coming into the final four that week. Nice people and we managed to find some common ground but we knew very little about college basketball.

 

Another time we were seated coincidentally with a family who knew my mom's best friend. It was a dad and two kids and they rarely showed up.

 

Nowadays we are a family of 6, and on our last few cruises we have been given a table all our own. However, I tend to do breakfast myself or with just one or two people and enjoy being seated with new people.

[Laurie S.]

When I cruised by myself, I liked the 10-tops and was lucky both times that my tablemates were great. But since I started cruising with my now husband, we only get a 2-top on YTD. Since he lives and works in Mexico, I only get to see him about every six weeks and we don't like to share our time. That also allows us to avoid kids, vegans, and religious zealots.

[srlafleur]

Why do I feel like if they were my table mates I'd make sure I ordered meat every night just to make sure they saw me? :D

 

Re the proselytizing vegans: AND, I'd probably make sure some of that meat was veal and little lambykins! Maybe some Bambi venison if it's available.

Sometimes people just ASK to be tormented...:rolleyes:

Edited June 24, 2015 by srlafleur

[sbbquilter]

We generally cruise with our kids and eat at a four top as we get to spend little time together but had a great time when I discovered at dinner the first night that our tablemate was a wonderful quilt teacher that I had long admired.

[4boysnana]

I want to sit at the quilters table!

[Chunder Worthy]

I remember one of the first nights when my wife and I were seated at a table for six and a couple approached our table took one look at us and spun around and headed for the maitre d.

 

Wow. Forget the old chestnut about not being able to tell a book by it's cover, it's hard to image people are THAT rude! I'm going on my second cruise (my DFF's first) in a few weeks and just hearing that makes me want to switch to ATD instead of our set-time spot. I mean heck, we sometimes think we're "different" from others (as most people do) and kiddingly call ourselves "The Icksters" just for fun -- I don't need to think that we're actually RIGHT! :eek: Anyway, that's really hurtful and I feel sorry for somebody who would do that to another. I mean it's one thing NOT to be nice but quite another to be specifically mean. I'm happy to sit down with anybody they assign us with (on our table of eight).

 

Sorry, just had to comment, and since this is a, uh, forum for doing so... Those later stories about 12-yr. olds looking like 18 or 25...OMG. Danger Will Robinson, DANGER!

[tigercat]

I usually like sitting with others. However we have had 3 times I wanted to change tables.

 

The first was on a Disney cruise. My husband and I as well as my daughter and granddaughter were seated with another couple and their son. The first night they sat down and the mother told the son to just concentrate on them and ignore us.

 

The second time was 2 couples and the mum from the Bronx. We are Canadian but enjoy finding out about others. Where they live what life is like ect. We sat down and they told us that we would probably find it boring as they were all a family and wouldn't have any idea what they were talking about. They had a good time talking to each other and ignoring us.

 

The 3rd time we were seated with 2 couples were were friends and sailed together a lot. The other 2 chairs never were filled. The 2 couples had great conversations and did talk to us a little bit but they weren't interested, funnily enough more so after they found out we were Canadians. It seemed that Canada was a horrible place even though they had never been there. I don't know if they thought we hated the U.S. or not but we never said anything bad about the U.S. but maybe they had had a bad experience before hand. Oh well.

 

The rest of the times we have had good tablemates. Not life long friends (although I have one on FB) but a good time was had.

tigercat

[wishIweretravelling]

I generally enjoy shared tables and getting to know people through a leisurely dinner. But I much prefer open seating to assigned. My first cruise was assigned seating. I was with my mother, who was recently widowed after 40 years of marriage. It was an Alaska cruise, and we'd joined a cruise already in progress, as we'd done a land program first. The first night, we were at a six-top with one extremely elderly couple who had trouble maintaining conversation (and he had trouble staying upright). But the first thing they said when we sat down was that everyone who'd been seated with them stayed one night then moved. We felt bad for them, so stayed at the table.

 

The next night, another mother/daughter combo joined the table. The mother, like mine, had recently been widowed after many years of marriage. My mother proudly explained how she had managed to learn the life skills like balancing a checkbook and paying bills that she'd previously left to my father. The other mother declared that she couldn't be bothered with such things, and was making her daughter do it until she could find another husband. Mother and daughter then started fighting, with daughter holding up my mother as an example of what Mom ought to do. They kept this up the whole cruise. Almost every night, the daughter left the table early in a huff.

 

The upside? My mother and I attained a new appreciation for each other.

[searoses]

We are in our mid-sixties but have lived an unconventional life as foster parents to special needs children....I always say we live like we are 35....so putting us at a table with our peers is a wild shot....our last trip this past winter found us on our first princess cruise....we opted for the mdr and seated with very mature diners.....one of the husbands needed to inform the table it was their 33rd princess cruise.......he spent several courses telling us why all the other lines were really bad and then....he took out a flosser and flossed his teeth at the table!!!!......eeeewwww......fled back to the awesome buffet for the rest of the nights....so grossed out...

[papcx]

....he took out a flosser and flossed his teeth at the table!!!!.

 

 

Classy!

[Velvetwater]

I dont get all the vegan hating, theres a complete difference between vegans and people who need to lecture others (whatever they eat).

 

2 of my friends are vegans and one is very quiet and just likes to listen and the other turns up with delicious vegan cakes (no idea how they are made) and loves to talk about all things (esp her crafts and art). The second friend once went to a wedding where one of guests at her table lectured her about her lack of protein/bizarre diet and was generally rude.

 

Dont group everyone the same because of their dietary choices.

[conte]

We prefer 2 tops. However once were assigned to a 4 top. We were already seated when the other couple arrived. The husband tried to be pleasant at least he greeted us, however the wife was awful. She kept the menu the entire meal in front of her, whispering to her husband from behind it. Never looked at us or spoke to us.

 

The only words audible from her, from behind her menu screen, were when they discussed ordering wine, she was vocal about not sharing with us.

 

We ate as fast as possible and stopped at the maitre d for an immediate reassignment. I pity her family.

[srlafleur]

I dont get all the vegan hating, theres a complete difference between vegans and people who need to lecture others (whatever they eat).

 

2 of my friends are vegans and one is very quiet and just likes to listen and the other turns up with delicious vegan cakes (no idea how they are made) and loves to talk about all things (esp her crafts and art). The second friend once went to a wedding where one of guests at her table lectured her about her lack of protein/bizarre diet and was generally rude.

 

Dont group everyone the same because of their dietary choices.

 

Very true, which is why, in my post, I specified "proselytizing", which could also apply to anyone - many meat-eaters do the same thing when positioned opposite a vegetarian or vegan. But it does seem that some vegans are particularly vociferous about their dietary choices and tend to rail against anyone who chooses differently.

As my mother used to say, "Who are you trying to convince? Me...or you?"

[Marseydotes]

I look at the cruise as an adventure, including dining! Our first cruise, over 20 years ago, taught us a great lesson:

Approaching the table, there were 6 others already there--an elderly woman and her 18-year-old granddaughter, a single older guy who appeared rather gruff, and an English older woman, as well as (whew!), a couple near our age--40ish.

After one or two nights, we realized, with some shock, that we had been "judging books!"

Granny turned out to be a cruise expert, having travelled everywhere, with great stories and advise. The gruff older guy kept buying us drinks and had us laughing constantly. The British retired school headmistress was delightful. We wound up on many excursions with these great folks!

Oh, the other couple near our age? Never spoke at dinner, never saw them outside of the dining room!

Now we travel with my sister and brother-in-law, so we usually ask for a four-top to avoid leaving others out of our conversation, but I do fondly remember the many characters we have met at sea at dinner!

[FTLcruisers]

One of our best tables was one where there were language barriers - our initial reaction was that it was going to be a long silent dinner but it turned out to be one of the best tables we've ever sat at! One couple was from Venezuela - the husband spoke pretty good English, the wife not so much. One couple was from Montreal where the wife was the one with good English and the husband wasn't. The 3rd couple hardly came to dinner but both spoke perfect English. We have never laughed so much as we did at this table - trying to make them understand a word or them trying to figure out how to make us understand was at times hysterical. At one point we thought we should start bringing an easel to the dining room so we could draw the item we were trying to explain. Simple words (to us) like powder and carriage are harder to explain than you'd think! Even our waiter made a comment about our table and how much she enjoyed watching different cultures blend.

 

We always request large tables and after more than 60 cruises we can honestly say there have only been maybe 3 or 4 that we didn't enjoy - not bad experiences, just not great. Actually our worst table ever was a table for 4!

 

 

Marianne

[legaljen1969]

My wife has Celiac disease and as such we aren't cruising with friends or family who are familiar with her restrictions we always choose to eat at a table for 2.

 

It's much easier than training someone who doesn't understand that, "NO! Please do NOT pass the bread!":rolleyes:

 

I don't pay any attention to what people eat unless they recommend it. Why not a simple "no thank you" if you dont want to or can't eat something. No need to feel the need to explain.

 

People really have a need to have TMI.

[legaljen1969]

Our experiences have been varied. Our honeymoon cruise we had 8 people at the table. We had great, horrible, and meh all at the same table. I don't know what they thought of us. We got along with everyone.

Even the horrible. They were just very conceited.