Help me convince my parents to join us!

[JamieLogical]

I get car sick to the point I can't read anything in a car, even looking at my phone for a minute makes me queasy. I have never had a problem on a ship. My daughter takes after me, but worse. She wears sea bands. (Looks like a wrist sweat band with a bead on the inside of the wrist). She has never had a problem on any of our cruises.

 

I am the same way. I can't read or sleep in the car and always have to sit in the front seat or the middle in the back so I can look straight out the windshield. That's why I almost always insist on driving on long trips. My mom isn't nearly as bad as I am, so I don't know what she's so worried about. I think it's that it's a "boat" and she thinks she will get seasick like she has done on small recreational boats or on the couple of river boats she's been on. She's not comprehending the size of the Escape and how minimal the motion actually is.

[Barb Nahoumi]

I get car sick to the point I can't read anything in a car, even looking at my phone for a minute makes me queasy. I have never had a problem on a ship. My daughter takes after me, but worse. She wears sea bands. (Looks like a wrist sweat band with a bead on the inside of the wrist). She has never had a problem on any of our cruises.

 

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Forums mobile app

 

I have the same problem. Bonine works wonders for me for cars and small boats. I can't read a book, map or my phone while riding in a car, without medication.

 

I never felt seasick on a large cruiseship, but I take Bonine as a precaution.

 

To the OP.

 

Tell your mom that she won't have to cook, do dishes, or any type of housework while on a cruise. She'll be waited on and pampered hand and foot. Tell your dad that he's getting a bargain with all the included meals in the MDR, and complimentary entertainment everywhere.

[PTC DAWG]

Them not going might be a blessing in disguise...

[karoo]

I personally wouldn’t try to convince them or force them to go if they don’t really want to go as I would stress the whole cruise that they weren’t enjoying themselves and I would be feeling responsible the whole time for their happiness.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

[cb at sea]

I agree with not forcing the issue...and definitely STOP 'talking it up"...if they do go, they are almost guaranteed not to have the fun you have promised they'll have.

Just tell them it's an enjoyable way to vacation, and if they ever decide to cruise, they will have the pleasure of discovery on their own!

[Turtles06]

I am the same way. I can't read or sleep in the car and always have to sit in the front seat or the middle in the back so I can look straight out the windshield. That's why I almost always insist on driving on long trips. My mom isn't nearly as bad as I am, so I don't know what she's so worried about. I think it's that it's a "boat" and she thinks she will get seasick like she has done on small recreational boats or on the couple of river boats she's been on. She's not comprehending the size of the Escape and how minimal the motion actually is.

 

It's pretty simple. She's worried because she has been sea sick before. Yes, big new cruise ships have stabilizers and quite often you can hardly even tell you are on a ship. (Yet some people still have problems; maybe your Mom would be one; it is certainly not irrational for her to be concerned about this.)

 

Plus, there is NO way to guarantee that you will not encounter rough weather and seas, especially during hurricane season in the Atlantic. (We sailed into a tough Nor'easter on the way back to NY from Bermuda on the Gem a number of years ago.)

 

In short, you can't know that your Mom will be physically comfortable on a cruise. And she can't either, which is why she is rationally concerned. Maybe you shouldn't be pushing her.

[MaryZ]

I am the same way. I can't read or sleep in the car and always have to sit in the front seat or the middle in the back so I can look straight out the windshield. That's why I almost always insist on driving on long trips. My mom isn't nearly as bad as I am, so I don't know what she's so worried about. I think it's that it's a "boat" and she thinks she will get seasick like she has done on small recreational boats or on the couple of river boats she's been on. She's not comprehending the size of the Escape and how minimal the motion actually is.

 

I would not pick a cruise to Bermuda out of NY in October to convince someone they should try cruising when they are afraid they will get seasick.

I think your sailing on the Bliss would be a much better choice for them. There are many reasons why the Escape is so cheap in October. Hurricanes and rainy season in Bermuda are the first two I think of.

[psac]

I would not pick a cruise to Bermuda out of NY in October to convince someone they should try cruising when they are afraid they will get seasick.

I think your sailing on the Bliss would be a much better choice for them. There are many reasons why the Escape is so cheap in October. Hurricanes and rainy season in Bermuda are the first two I think of.

 

I was going to say the same thing. The waters out of NY in October can be very rough!! Two years ago on the DCL Magic out of NY in Oct, the first two days were nonstop huge waves, the big production shows moved to later in the week for the safety of the dancers, and everyone was generally miserable. I myself do get motion sick, but I pop a Bonine every morning, and I wore my seabands those days for double-duty, and I was fine. But if that was a first cruise experience, I could see people NOT being happy. :rolleyes:

 

They might really like the cruise, but instead of “you won’t feel it,” I would stress the Bonine/Dramamine, seasbands, etc, and how they all work IF you hit rough weather.

[AnonomissX]

Show them Youtube videos of people having fun on a cruise ship, but take them on the later cruise. Make sure they get a "mid-ship" cabin and include a drink package. That should make them happy and eager to go :)

[Peachypooh]

Is it possible that they have other objections that they don't tell you? I have a relative that is partly deaf that screams when he talks and my ears ring when I am with him. Never in a million years would I tell him I can't be around him for that reason.He can't help it anymore than I can help my sensitivity to loud talking. He wanted to go on a cruise with us and I just said that we like to do our own thing (true). As for being frugal it is difficult to be around someone who always weighs the cost of everything (something this relative also does). And I have to agree the Atlantic ocean at the end of hurricane season can be pretty rough.

[All-ready2cruise]

My question is, as a parent and grandparent and great grandparent: "why do you feel you need to convince them/persuade them to do something they obviously don't want to do"? I've had friends and family who've asked me to do things that I'm not really interested in doing... they try to persuade me as much as they want but there are reasons why I don't want to "join us in our trip to Iceland or Alaska or Norway" wherever it may be, and they will come to realize that I have my personal reasons for not joining them. And it's not because I don't want to be with them.

 

We have lots of other things we do together but we know each other well enough to know, if the answer is "NO", it means no regardless of the reason.

 

I hope you can find some common ground and I know your parents love you but you need to understand them too.

[Peachypooh]

My question is, as a parent and grandparent and great grandparent: "why do you feel you need to convince them/persuade them to do something they obviously don't want to do"? I've had friends and family who've asked me to do things that I'm not really interested in doing... they try to persuade me as much as they want but there are reasons why I don't want to "join us in our trip to Iceland or Alaska or Norway" wherever it may be, and they will come to realize that I have my personal reasons for not joining them. And it's not because I don't want to be with them.

 

We have lots of other things we do together but we know each other well enough to know, if the answer is "NO", it means no regardless of the reason.

 

I hope you can find some common ground and I know your parents love you but you need to understand them too.

 

 

I agree with this post. I am a grandmother too and sometimes when asked I say no for personal reasons. And it is not that I don't want to be with people. It can be as simple as going on a 4 hour hike with no comfort facilities. OK for young people but few seniors can do that and it would feel awkward to talk about.

[All-ready2cruise]

I agree with this post. I am a grandmother too and sometimes when asked I say no for personal reasons. And it is not that I don't want to be with people. It can be as simple as going on a 4 hour hike with no comfort facilities. OK for young people but few seniors can do that and it would feel awkward to talk about.

 

Exactly, thank you. :)

[tonit964]

I don't think anyone should try to "convince" anyone to do anything. If they don't seem to be on board with it when you bring it up, you need to let it go. You may seem to think you know what they will be missing out on, but if they've never cruised, they won't know and that's OK. If they did go and didn't enjoy it right from the get go, it will ruin your experience trying to make them happy. You can't.

 

I absolutely love, love cruising so I get where you're coming from but it's not for everyone and sure, they may be missing out on something they would love but its their choice to make.

[Travelling2Some]

I enjoy cruising BUT have significant issues with motion sickness. The sickest I've ever been was definitely New York to Bermuda because it's the open Atlantic. Maybe choose a cruise in more "contained" waters like the Med or Baltic or even the Caribbean. Fjords cruises are also great for motion sickness issues. I also agree with those who point out that your parents may have personal difficulties that are not obvious to a younger person. That said I do think it's generally a good idea to at least try something once if there is a good chance you will like it and, aside from the seasickness issue, Bermuda is an ideal first cruise because you stay in the same port for several days. Even if they don't like the shipboard experience they will still enjoy Bermuda. Cruising is a very good value, it's also low stress and there is just something special about it.

[Daytonasailor]

JAMIE l, I don't know your financial situation, but consider this. My DD (age 40) flatly refused to cruise with us. GD begged her to go. So I decided to try a new approach. I said I would pay for everything and drive us all to the port. She has a good job so I don't think the money was a factor but it just seemed to make things so much easier. Now, we are all looking forward to our Dec cruise. And, I got a new CC which offered 0% interest for the first year. Easy payments.

[Markanddonna]

I am over trying to talk some people into the idea that a cruise is a great idea. Some folks just like to argue and present their stereotypical excuses we hear over and over again. A few of these types make up issues like "I'm claustrophobic" (always a good go-to excuse) and judge possible issues like seasickness by their former experiences on little boats in rough water.

 

Don't try to counter these arguments because they could be real problems that will come back to bite you. "I told you I get sea sick!"

 

The way I look at these folks is this: their NOT cruising helps to drive down my competition and the prices. Keep mentioning your wonderful plans, but don't get sucked into silly arguments.

[Takoyaki]

Sadly everyone is right. I wouldn't force it or else you'll stress. I invited a friend to join us with no pressure. Just explained suite/haven experience and showed him the website and he was sold. Even with him having 0 hesitation I still feel slightly responsible for his enjoyment now.

 

I wouldn't pressure them, but always extend an invite. Just leave it at that though; a no pressure invitation.

[Relax@Sea]

My Sister and Brother in law were never really interested in cruises and I felt that they would enjoy cruising.

What I did was when we were with them and others I would always talk about my cruises around them with someone other than them that enjoyed cruises as much as I did.

 

Note: They are much older then me so I thought they always needed to give me advice and would reject the idea.

 

I would talk about the cabin, the ship, the Ports, the bars, shows and crew, I made sure the discussion was always positive.

After 3 or 4 times of doing this "not talking to them directly", my Sister started asking me questions about cruises and asked me if I would mind if She and my Brother in law could come on one of the cruises with me.

So they eventually booked one with me, I never directly asked them "it was their idea".

 

When they did booked the first one I then told them some of the negatives about cruising and since then my Sister went on 3 cruises with me and my Brother in law went on that first one.

Now He always brings it up as that was the best trip he has ever been on.

 

We all are again going on another cruise that my Sister set up on the Star on July 22, 2018, and they are more excited for the cruise then I am.

[karoo]

My Sister and Brother in law were never really interested in cruises and I felt that they would enjoy cruising.

What I did was when we were with them and others I would always talk about my cruises around them with someone other than them that enjoyed cruises as much as I did.

 

Note: They are much older then me so I thought they always needed to give me advice and would reject the idea.

 

I would talk about the cabin, the ship, the Ports, the bars, shows and crew, I made sure the discussion was always positive.

After 3 or 4 times of doing this "not talking to them directly", my Sister started asking me questions about cruises and asked me if I would mind if She and my Brother in law could come on one of the cruises with me.

So they eventually booked one with me, I never directly asked them "it was their idea".

 

When they did booked the first one I then told them some of the negatives about cruising and since then my Sister went on 3 cruises with me and my Brother in law went on that first one.

Now He always brings it up as that was the best trip he has ever been on.

 

We all are again going on another cruise that my Sister set up on the Star on July 22, 2018, and they are more excited for the cruise then I am.

 

 

 

Wow! All sounds a little manipulative.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

[billslowsky]

Get a bigger room and leave dad home.

[emcelh]

Wow! All sounds a little manipulative.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

but in a good way

[jessicak76]

I have to agree with others....don't force it if they truly aren't interested. its a nice thought, but once on the ship if they really don't want to be there they will be miserable and you will too

[Relax@Sea]

Wow! All sounds a little manipulative.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

 

No, not a little. It boarders on excessive manipulation, but it worked.

Now if I can only get it to work with my Wife.:D

[kathy884]

I personally wouldn’t try to convince them or force them to go if they don’t really want to go as I would stress the whole cruise that they weren’t enjoying themselves and I would be feeling responsible the whole time for their happiness.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

 

Not meaning to pick on karoo here. This is just one example of lots of similar posts that I am seeing and the opinion of quite a few posters.

 

But OP I'm really surprised about all the posts I'm seeing that say I wouldn't pressure them, as I don't think that's what you are trying to do here. I guess it depends on your personality and the personality of your parents. I was reading this more of your trying to talk it up another time because you just love traveling with them and think they'd love it so much, and obviously if they say no, they say no.

 

In my family there is no way that my parents would ever let me pressure them into something they wouldn't want to do., so it's not something I would ever worry about. I think what you are asking here is "How can I talk up the cruise".

 

Also, ultimately deciding to go or not on someone else's part is their choice and their responsibility and your "talking something up" is not your being responsible for someone else's happiness or misery." I remember years ago, I was telling my dad how much I loved the Millennium Force roller coaster at Cedar Point and that I thought he would really like it as it was so smooth and not jerky at all. He decided to try it and was super uncomfortable with it, didn't feel that great afterwards and went to the room for a while. I told him I felt really bad about it, as I felt like I had talked him into it. He told me not to give it a second thought. He said what he chose to do was totally his decision and responsibility, and anything I told him was in good faith and my thoughts and opinions. I think he was right on, on that.

 

Sure, we talk things up and may influence friends and relatives to do things that we think they might like (And I think we should have the courage to do that especially when we are doing that with love and kindness and thinking about them) and sure they talk things up to us too (And I am glad they do). But at the end of the day you are ultimately responsible for what you decide and someone else is not responsible for your happiness or misery.

 

Also OP, I heard you say your parents are pretty easy going people and not hard to please which is what I would say is the same for mine. And that makes everything easier, and parents like that are ideal traveling companions.

 

Good luck in your conversation. Even if they don't come it sounds like you have terrific parents and that you are lucky to have them and they are lucky to have you. And just the fact that you enjoy each other so much and do like traveling together is a real blessing and not a situation most people have.