Kids Behavior

[Thebosn1]

I guess I'll be the little boy who tells the emperor he has no clothes on. I don't by this at all. Yes it's a different world today than it was when I was raised in the 60's, but I think kids and parents take a bad wrap because it's different.

 

My mother, and my friends parents, all believed in the belt and disciplined us. We were also told children were to be seen and not heard from. Despite this level of discipline and expectation, we still got in plenty of trouble and did a lot of stupid things. Sometimes people were injured, most often us. We were kids. We weren't bad kids just kids. When my parents went to a party we were left alone (unsupervised as you now put it) and chaos ensued. When we all went together to places, the adults congregated and the kids went off on our own. If we did something that got back to our parents we were punished. When the next opportunity came up, we did the same thing. Before you ask, I had my first job at 12 cleaning offices after school, so I was not running with a bunch of privileged brats. Again we were kids. The biggest difference was, if an adult saw us they stopped us, whether we were their kids or not. They didn't judge our parents for not following us all day in the car, they didn't judge us as bad, they yelled "What the hell are you doing? Get down from that." and we did. I guess I was not the angel that many of you (and evidently your children) were, who never broke a rule, ran into someone, or blocked the stairs by sitting on it. In fact if you asked my mother, she would probably tell you that it would have been a prayer answered to get a call telling her that my fiends and I were sitting on the step blocking the way. Then she would have said "Well tell them to get the hell up, your the adult."

 

I think the problem is, we get on forums like this and hide behind anonymity, and become way over the top in rhetoric because it's easy. If you don't want to deal with kids and their behavior, I get that. As others have mentioned, find an adult oriented cruise or vacation. But what is the necessity to condemn kids and parents in general. It's funny how so many people will go here blame others for ruining a vacation, but WON'T simply tell a 12 year old "Hey stop throwing stuff all over, and pick that up." The vast majority of kids are good kids (just like yours) and they will do what you ask if you are calm and reasonable in your instruction. Try putting your hands up and saying "Hey slow down, its to crowded to run". I have never had a kid curse me out for saying this. Yes, sometimes they don't hear it, but curse me out. Never happened. I have never had a parent come after me for talking to their kid, other than to apologize. Maybe its that when these things happen I'm calm, not mad. I'm not thinking less of anyone, I simply want them to stop. When the parents approach, I tell them the truth, "He/she was just being a kid, it's no big deal. I did worse when I was their age." Same goes for the kids. I don't think whats wrong with your parents, why are you so rude. I think and say "Hey stop throwing the popcorn please". I'm sure somewhere out there are these unruly kids and defensive parents, but they are not the majority.

 

There is a big difference in the world I see today is that people want to fix blame not problems. As ma23peas eluded to, why are you all so afraid to step up and ask a kid to stop? My first thought is, God I hope someone would tell my kid to knock it off.

 

Thebosn1

if you don't want to deal with kids, I don't think you should have to qualify it by saying "I don't hate kids". I get how someone can reach the point where they just don't want to deal with it. I do think you'll have a a hard time finding a cruise on Royal without kids who are acting like kids.

 

Are you speaking of the same anonymity that makes you think you can come on here and preach to everyone about how off base they are? First of all, I don't think I said I don't hate kids, and if I did it wasn't to "qualify my remarks". Second, do you honestly think I have never stopped a kid from acting up, or spoken to a parent? You feel you are somehow the only person that has the magic do that? Lastly, I asked a pretty simple question. You finally answered it in the last line of your dissertation. The instances I gave were true, not rhetoric. They were not exaggerations. Thank you for answering my question. I didn't need the term paper on how to be an adult.

[lovescats5]

The problem is not the kids but the parents. I grew up in the 60's, my kids grew up in the 80's and during that time adults could talk to any child about their behavior and the kids would listen and straighten up. I cannot count how many parents I know now who believe their kids do nothing wrong and if I or any other adult were to say something to their kids, they would threaten you somehow because their kids would never do anything wrong. I know this because my husband taught high school and he could take no action with the students except send them to the principals office where the parents would pick them up and complain about the teacher being wrong. He taught welding and an accident could have caused harm to him or students. I truly feel the challenge is with todays parents. They both work, are usually tired when they get home, and do not want to deal with any children problems. I felt this way at times and I was a stay at home mom. Not placing blame on any one person or child, just my opinion there is no incentive for kids to step up to the plate and take responsibilty for their actions.

[Domino D]

Are you speaking of the same anonymity that makes you think you can come on here and preach to everyone about how off base they are? First of all, I don't think I said I don't hate kids, and if I did it wasn't to "qualify my remarks". Second, do you honestly think I have never stopped a kid from acting up, or spoken to a parent? You feel you are somehow the only person that has the magic do that? Lastly, I asked a pretty simple question. You finally answered it in the last line of your dissertation. The instances I gave were true, not rhetoric. They were not exaggerations. Thank you for answering my question. I didn't need the term paper on how to be an adult.

I'm sorry if that came across as all being directed at you, it was not. I hope you find a cruise that you enjoy. We all deserve that. I thought your original question was fair, and had more than 1 response to the thread.

 

I know there are others who do what I suggested. Some of them also responded, so no there isn't one thing special about me. Ask my wife. I was only offering a different opinion to some of the posts made.

 

The comments about you, were meant as response to people who took things too far the other way. I was saying that I never saw a comment from you that I took as you don't like kids. You were just looking for certain experience.

 

You are for sure correct about the anonymity comment being unfair, given that we are all in that position on here. I will be more careful in the future.

 

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[Smiley525]

The problem is not the kids but the parents. I grew up in the 60's, my kids grew up in the 80's and during that time adults could talk to any child about their behavior and the kids would listen and straighten up. I cannot count how many parents I know now who believe their kids do nothing wrong and if I or any other adult were to say something to their kids, they would threaten you somehow because their kids would never do anything wrong. I know this because my husband taught high school and he could take no action with the students except send them to the principals office where the parents would pick them up and complain about the teacher being wrong. He taught welding and an accident could have caused harm to him or students. I truly feel the challenge is with todays parents. They both work, are usually tired when they get home, and do not want to deal with any children problems. I felt this way at times and I was a stay at home mom. Not placing blame on any one person or child, just my opinion there is no incentive for kids to step up to the plate and take responsibilty for their actions.

 

100% true! 80% of parents don’t want to hear anything negative about their kids or don’t believe their kids would do anything wrong. I’m a substitute teacher (worked long term jobs and day to day) mostly elementary and it’s prevalent and sad! Even admin has their hands tied-it’s hard to suspend kids now too.

[Vlgg731]

We usually cruise HAL and have never had problems with kids on that line. We have done 2 Holiday cruises and the few children that were on that line were well behaved. We are scheduled on Allure of the Seas December 2019 (Christmas) with grandkids otherwise wouldn't do RCI because when I vacation I don't want to spend it with a bunch of children.

[Crazy planning mom]

I know I am going to get the book thrown at me but I think the problem is the kids but adults who are intolerant of kids. Back in the day, everyone was expected to have kids. Nowadays, lots of people choose to remain child free.

That's wonderful but you can't expect the rest of the world to be that way.

Also back in the day, kids were actually worse behaved. Bullying was actually accepted and if you said anything you were a tattletale. The difference is airfare was much more expensive, cruises only left from Florida, and people had larger families. Cruising also was more costly. My parents never took me cruising when I was a kid. However, my 16 year old son has been multiple cruises. Kids aren't worse at all but they travel much more today and are surrounded by intolerant adults.

[Crazy planning mom]

The problem is not the kids but the parents. I grew up in the 60's, my kids grew up in the 80's and during that time adults could talk to any child about their behavior and the kids would listen and straighten up. I cannot count how many parents I know now who believe their kids do nothing wrong and if I or any other adult were to say something to their kids, they would threaten you somehow because their kids would never do anything wrong. I know this because my husband taught high school and he could take no action with the students except send them to the principals office where the parents would pick them up and complain about the teacher being wrong. He taught welding and an accident could have caused harm to him or students. I truly feel the challenge is with todays parents. They both work, are usually tired when they get home, and do not want to deal with any children problems. I felt this way at times and I was a stay at home mom. Not placing blame on any one person or child, just my opinion there is no incentive for kids to step up to the plate and take responsibilty for their actions.

I call b.s. I grew up in the 70's and 80's. All the stay at home moms were hanging out, sold tupperware to each other, and planned block parties. They had no clue where their kids were. My mom worked and she was very attentive. When she came home, homework was checked and dinner was prepared. I couldn't put anything past her. Teen pregnancy was much higher then.

[Robinhill]

I call b.s. I grew up in the 70's and 80's. All the stay at home moms were hanging out, sold tupperware to each other, and planned block parties. They had no clue where their kids were. My mom worked and she was very attentive. When she came home, homework was checked and dinner was prepared. I couldn't put anything past her. Teen pregnancy was much higher then.

 

 

 

I love kids, have grandkids who know how to behave in public places,and i help in the local elementary school. The last cruise i was on in Alaska in June week after school let out- there were literally packs of 10-15 kids running amok through the ship, loud, obnoxious, intrusive, running into people etc. No parent to be seen anywhere. Youngest maybe 4- all of the way up to maybe 14. It was horrendous. The parents are responsible for them! They just don't want to be bothered- but boy let something bad happen to one of those kids and they will try to blame everyone but themselves for not even knowing where they were or what they were doing.

[lovescats5]

I was a stay at home mom and I did not sell Tupperware, plan block parties or anything else. I spent 3 days a week at my son's school helping the teacher however they needed. I knew where my kids were and who they were playing with. I was home at noon when they came home for lunch. I stand by my comments and believe many of the problems started when discipline flew out the window because working parents were to tired to spend time. Not all parents but most.

[Crazy planning mom]

I love kids, have grandkids who know how to behave in public places,and i help in the local elementary school. The last cruise i was on in Alaska in June week after school let out- there were literally packs of 10-15 kids running amok through the ship, loud, obnoxious, intrusive, running into people etc. No parent to be seen anywhere. Youngest maybe 4- all of the way up to maybe 14. It was horrendous. The parents are responsible for them! They just don't want to be bothered- but boy let something bad happen to one of those kids and they will try to blame everyone but themselves for not even knowing where they were or what they were doing.

That is terrible. Wonder where the parents were. I suspect Alaska is not the best port for young kids.

[Crazy planning mom]

I was a stay at home mom and I did not sell Tupperware, plan block parties or anything else. I spent 3 days a week at my son's school helping the teacher however they needed. I knew where my kids were and who they were playing with. I was home at noon when they came home for lunch. I stand by my comments and believe many of the problems started when discipline flew out the window because working parents were to tired to spend time. Not all parents but most.

Completely disagree and don’t think it’s right to attack working parents.

[jimdalva]

We have been on 26 cruises across many lines and never had a problem with kids. Maybe my tolerance is higher.

[lovescats5]

Not attacking parents. Just stating my opinion. Your opinion is just that also.

[kimberja14]

We were on NCL a couple years ago and outside one of the bars there were 3 young boys playing kickball...inside. I had to dodge a ball on my way to the restroom. While in the restroom my husband was waiting just outside the door and was hit with the ball along with an elderly lady. My husband told the kids to knock it off. The drunk parents and their drunk friend came out of the bar after their boys went and told them and actually approached us very aggressively and said we had no right to talk to their kids. The dad kept yelling that it was a fun ship and his kids can do whatever they want. Here’s the thing...if you don’t parent your own kids, other people will do it for you. That said, most of the kids we have encountered on cruises have been well behaved and parents have mostly been pretty attentive.

 

 

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[SailingShelley]

I have never sailed RCI, but I have an honest question. I have been cruising for a long, long time on another cruise line but I am thinking of switching. The reason is simple, the unsupervised kids are completely out of control on the cruise ships and staffs REFUSE to do anything about it.

 

I'm not exaggerating and I am not just someone that bitches about families with kids. I'm talking about people being hurt, entire vacations ruined because parents refuse to control their kids. Complete brushing off of nearly all rules. And the staff will simply not do anything about it.

 

So my question is simple; does the staff on this line hold parents accountable for monitoring and controlling their kids or not? I never thought I would actually leave the cruise line that I have always used, but things get worse every time I sail and I have had it. I don't want to stop cruising, but I am looking for a line that actually holds parents accountable for the behavior of their kids when it gets out of hand.

Now that I have read your original question, I'd like to respond by saying that as a long as Chuck and I have cruised, we have always enjoyed Royal without any kid issues. The last time we brought children was in 1998. The programs offered are a plus to keep the kids occupied. There are adult areas that have signs displayed. I have seen some under age kids taken there by parents who are approached by cruise staff requesting that they move to other child friendly locations. We enjoy the late seating in the dining room that tends to be more adult. In addition, we watch when children are on vacation or holiday and choose other times to cruise.

If you are looking for a more homogenous cruise with little to no kids, try Celebrity. We like to sail with them as well but the activity level is less and the crowd seems older. almost all couples and more seasoned cruisers.

[Host Jacquelyn]

I know I am going to get the book thrown at me but I think the problem is the kids but adults who are intolerant of kids. Back in the day, everyone was expected to have kids. Nowadays, lots of people choose to remain child free.

That's wonderful but you can't expect the rest of the world to be that way.

Also back in the day, kids were actually worse behaved. Bullying was actually accepted and if you said anything you were a tattletale. The difference is airfare was much more expensive, cruises only left from Florida, and people had larger families. Cruising also was more costly. My parents never took me cruising when I was a kid. However, my 16 year old son has been multiple cruises. Kids aren't worse at all but they travel much more today and are surrounded by intolerant adults.

 

I agree 100%! I have seen many more instances of poorly behaved adults on cruise ships than kids. I have personally witnessed an adult lean up against the elevator control panel, accidentally pressing a bunch of floors, and then turn around and blame a child. Another time, one man actually slapped my little 3 or 4 year old son's hand when he proudly went to press the floor number we were headed to. It was a combination of shock and not wanting to further upset my little one that held me back from ripping into him, but honestly who does that?? I'm sure his side of the story is how he prevented some wild toddler from pushing the elevator buttons

[lbjen]

I love kids, have grandkids who know how to behave in public places,and i help in the local elementary school. The last cruise i was on in Alaska in June week after school let out- there were literally packs of 10-15 kids running amok through the ship, loud, obnoxious, intrusive, running into people etc. No parent to be seen anywhere. Youngest maybe 4- all of the way up to maybe 14. It was horrendous. The parents are responsible for them! They just don't want to be bothered- but boy let something bad happen to one of those kids and they will try to blame everyone but themselves for not even knowing where they were or what they were doing.

 

You saw a 4 year old running around without a parent and didn’t think to call security?

 

The thing that irritates me about blaming today’s parents for the state of everything wrong with the world, is that we didn’t just all get together one day and decide this is how we raise kids now - most of them learned it from their own parents, who are often the same people wagging their fingers at us to tell us what a bad job we’re doing!

[Robinhill]

We have been on 26 cruises across many lines and never had a problem with kids. Maybe my tolerance is higher.

 

i also had never experienced any problems until the last two cruises ( i have been on 24) but i fear that this is a sign if things to come since the last two were so difficult!

[Robinhill]

You saw a 4 year old running around without a parent and didn’t think to call security?

 

The thing that irritates me about blaming today’s parents for the state of everything wrong with the world, is that we didn’t just all get together one day and decide this is how we raise kids now - most of them learned it from their own parents, who are often the same people wagging their fingers at us to tell us what a bad job we’re doing!

 

 

Well of course i questioned the kids in the group and was told the 14 year old was the sister and "watching him".

[SailingShelley]

Well of course i questioned the kids in the group and was told the 14 year old was the sister and "watching him".

 

Since moving to Florida from Michigan five years ago, we have not been doing as many Caribbean cruises since we no longer cruise there to escape the winters Instead we have broadened our horizons by sailing beyond this area. There are less children when the cruises are longer and require more expense when air fare is involved in the mix. When we have cruised in the local (now local for us) areas to Florida, we always cruise when the kids are in school. This is the way to find a lower keyed trip with less children as distractions.

[Thebosn1]

I know I am going to get the book thrown at me but I think the problem is the kids but adults who are intolerant of kids. Back in the day, everyone was expected to have kids. Nowadays, lots of people choose to remain child free.

That's wonderful but you can't expect the rest of the world to be that way.

Also back in the day, kids were actually worse behaved. Bullying was actually accepted and if you said anything you were a tattletale. The difference is airfare was much more expensive, cruises only left from Florida, and people had larger families. Cruising also was more costly. My parents never took me cruising when I was a kid. However, my 16 year old son has been multiple cruises. Kids aren't worse at all but they travel much more today and are surrounded by intolerant adults.

 

So the things I see that I am concerned about are just me being intolerant? You are just rephrasing the "kids being kids" argument and I don't buy that at all. I DO believe the root of the problem is the adults, but it is the unwillingness of the adults to actually control their kids. I disagree that kids behaved worse years ago. If they tried, they were STOPPED by the adults. They are able to behave MUCH WORSE now because there is no boundary they can't cross. Do you really think the kid on the Spirit's first act of disruptive behavior was chucking a glass bottle at someone's head from a hundred feet above?

 

You make a really interesting point about kids traveling now. I think you are right. I never got on a plane until I got married, didn't even take my own daughter on my first cruise because it was an anniversary celebration. The combination of cheaper air and the cruise prices themselves allow entire families to cruise. I think that is fantastic, but I think that on a cruise it is a bit different than being on a beach or going to Disney. We are all piled into some of those areas together. More seasoned cruisers know this, and most try to show a little more respect for each other's space through their actions. Maybe newer, or first time cruisers with multiple kids don't understand this? I don't have a problem speaking to people about their kids behavior, but I think the ship's staff should help them to set boundaries as well.

[SirRedman]

The problem is not the kids but the parents. I grew up in the 60's, my kids grew up in the 80's and during that time adults could talk to any child about their behavior and the kids would listen and straighten up. I cannot count how many parents I know now who believe their kids do nothing wrong and if I or any other adult were to say something to their kids, they would threaten you somehow because their kids would never do anything wrong. I know this because my husband taught high school and he could take no action with the students except send them to the principals office where the parents would pick them up and complain about the teacher being wrong. He taught welding and an accident could have caused harm to him or students. I truly feel the challenge is with todays parents. They both work, are usually tired when they get home, and do not want to deal with any children problems. I felt this way at times and I was a stay at home mom. Not placing blame on any one person or child, just my opinion there is no incentive for kids to step up to the plate and take responsibilty for their actions.

 

 

I couldn't agree more with your statements!

[Olga Largo]

Totally disagree.

 

 

 

Have seen security "round up" kids who were actually playing cards in a stair area and tell them to go to their cabins as it was almost curfew.

 

 

 

Also kick an entire family out of the solarium. Large family pretending "no English" with several kids, including swim diapers, and just being very loud and taking over the pool. Several people complained. Two security guards showed up. Prior to that several passengers had tried to explain in Spanish that the area was for adults. One of the guards quickly switched to Portuguese - they picked up all their stuff and left. Many people thanked the security guard. He said no problem and said he would keep an eye on them. He also said he knew at least some of the group spoke English as they had been quite unruly elsewhere on the ship.

 

 

 

I would add that we are talking about “mega ships”... 6000 people in peak season!!

 

 

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[suspaul]

Some of these reasons are why we’ve stopped sailing on the huge ships, way too many unruly children. It seems like some parents want to have a good time, after all, it’s not like their kids can get off the ship, so they feel it’s OK to let them have the run of the ship without adequate supervision. I get it that it’s their vacation too but supervise those kids. Last cruise on RCCl and Princess we said no more, we’ll stick with more adult lines. Viking Oceans is a wonderful example, no one under 18 and yep, maybe I’m a curmudgeon but I enjoy my vacations also.

 

 

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[sross6019]

May need to look at Voyager class or smaller. Less kids but Voyager has a lot to offer. It is our favorite class. I have seen adults (mainly 25-40ish age) being out of control more than kids. Once on the elevator and had a 25ish man push all the buttons while existing on deck 4 and on the way out stated that he was a kid at heart. Also have seen staff talk to kids and parents. I think it depends on the ship and what the kids are doing.