Jump to content
Cruise Critic Community
Ukigirl

Why Don’t You Think Before You Speak?

Recommended Posts

12 hours ago, squadron said:

I went to a "solo" lunch once - the cruise staff member and four others - two of which were sisters.  Actually I found it not as enjoyable as joining a table in MDR on sea days or eating alone in the WJ .


I’ve been to three.  First was nice - larger group and great staff member.  2nd on same cruise - smaller group with same people and staff member needed to leave mid-meal.  Still, enjoyed it enough to try on my next cruise - only one other traveler showed up and the cruise staff left as soon as we were seated.
 

***

 

I have traveled solo to all seven continents and never would have if I had to wait for someone else.  Luckily I don’t get a lot of these questions as I am also single in real life.  Nevertheless, I was struck particularly by the “is your marriage okay” question.  The first snarky response I thought of was “yes, thank you, it’s so great that my husband loves and trusts me enough to let me go on my own.  I’m sorry your marriage isn’t as strong.”

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Alter Ego said:


I’ve been to three.  First was nice - larger group and great staff member.  2nd on same cruise - smaller group with same people and staff member needed to leave mid-meal.  Still, enjoyed it enough to try on my next cruise - only one other traveler showed up and the cruise staff left as soon as we were seated.
 

***

 

I have traveled solo to all seven continents and never would have if I had to wait for someone else.  Luckily I don’t get a lot of these questions as I am also single in real life.  Nevertheless, I was struck particularly by the “is your marriage okay” question.  The first snarky response I thought of was “yes, thank you, it’s so great that my husband loves and trusts me enough to let me go on my own.  I’m sorry your marriage isn’t as strong.”

Love your post! 🙂

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I travel as a single mum with a 10 year old autistic child. 

 

I get questioned all all the time as to “where is your husband” or “where is the father of the child”.

 

so tempted to tell them “he’s in the backyard under the lemon tree. Asked to many questions that had nothing to do with him” 

 

i have ave had a few ladies laugh at me and offer me their husbands. Nope happy on my own with my son.

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've taken my fair share of cruises without my husband.  I was fortunate to retire early (Federal and State Retirements) six years ago.  My husband has several years to go as he didn't retire from the government and  is way to young to collect on his 401's, etc.  He doesn't expect me to sit at home on top of a mountain in the winter time waiting for him to retire.  So, what do I do, I cruise, I also travel back and forth to see my family and do volunteer work with the Wounded Warrior Program.  

 

My husband has received many comments from family members, coworkers and friends.  He just let's them know that he totally supports me "living my life". Let the hater's hate. They are just jealous and have nothing better to do then to gossip!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, Ukigirl said:

I’ve decided to post a live thread about my first solo adventure so stay tuned ,

i'm so excited to read this!! i'm in my early 20s and hope to be able to cruise solo one day! it sounds like a dream...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've never really traveled solo, aside from going home when I was on leave before I was married. Since then I have pretty much always had either the kids or the husband with me, the only exceptions were flying to my hometown to attend my grandmother's funeral and one weekend with girlfriends (so still not alone). I would travel alone if I was given the opportunity though. It just isn't in the cards for me right now. But my husband and children love to travel so I enjoy that. Someday when the kids are out of the house our circumstances might change. My husband does travel al one for business a couple of times a year though. And a couple years ago I started checking into a local hotel for one or two nights (depending on what we have going on). The little time away for me to be completely selfish is so nice. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/3/2020 at 8:04 PM, Ukigirl said:

I’m amused by some of the dumb things people have said to me when they found out I’m taking a solo cruise. 

 

IGNORE THEM !!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/3/2020 at 5:04 PM, Ukigirl said:

I’m amused by some of the dumb things people have said to me when they found out I’m taking a solo cruise. I’m happily married, hubby and I have gone on at least a dozen cruises so I’m very comfortable with RCL ships. Because of his work schedule he has limited vacation days , most of those will be used for a back to back in November but my office will be closed for a couple weeks in March.  I brought up the idea of my bucket list which includes a solo cruise and he has no problem with me going.  I’m an introvert, love alone time so looking forward to being a big girl by flying to Fort Lauderdale, staying overnight and getting on that ship all by myself (been married for 32 years). Just want to chill by the pool with my books, eat when I want to and basically do whatever I want and this a big deal for me.  If I want to talk to other people I will, if I don’t then that’s just fine too. Well, told some members of my family and friends and got so many comments, everything from “aren’t you scared for your safety “, “what are people on the ship going to think when they see you by yourself “, “you will be eating alone?” and my absolute favorite “is everything ok with your marriage??”  I’ve read a lot of threads on Solo cruises, I’m a smart woman who can take care of myself and yet I still can’t believe those comments. Yeah should have kept my mouth shut. Sorry for the long rant 🙄

Don’t worry about others. Those that can’t enjoy life alone have other issues. You do you which is fabulous!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/4/2020 at 9:49 AM, watson61 said:

One comment you might get is "You're so brave."  I've gotten that several times, always from a woman (and let's face it, some women can barely go to the bathroom by themselves - forget about going on a cruise solo).

 

Ah yes, the 'you're so brave!' comment - my personal favorite. I like to reply with, 'well, I managed to survive 9 months in Iraq, I'm pretty sure I can handle this.' 😂 It's mind-boggling to me that people think there's something 'brave' about a week solo on a cruise ship - it's my idea of heaven and I do it as much as possible! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, samiam0403 said:

 

Ah yes, the 'you're so brave!' comment - my personal favorite. I like to reply with, 'well, I managed to survive 9 months in Iraq, I'm pretty sure I can handle this.' 😂 It's mind-boggling to me that people think there's something 'brave' about a week solo on a cruise ship - it's my idea of heaven and I do it as much as possible! 

Thank you for your service!  
 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Leaving on a solo cruise this month and looking forward to it.   I have taken several solo cruises and enjoyed them all!  
I’m a widow,  so not exactly your situation - some members of my family express some anxiety about my traveling alone but I m comfortable with solo travel.  I cruise/travel with friends and relatives, but I also (selfishly) love solo trips.  There is much to be enjoyed about rising when you want, spending a lazy afternoon reading on your balcony, going to bed at 1 AM without worrying about waking up a cabin mate.  I usually dine in the MDR and i don’t mind being solo at the table.  I am sure you are going to enjoy your cruise - happy travels!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/3/2020 at 8:04 PM, Ukigirl said:

I’m amused by some of the dumb things people have said to me when they found out I’m taking a solo cruise. I’m happily married, hubby and I have gone on at least a dozen cruises so I’m very comfortable with RCL ships. Because of his work schedule he has limited vacation days , most of those will be used for a back to back in November but my office will be closed for a couple weeks in March.  I brought up the idea of my bucket list which includes a solo cruise and he has no problem with me going.  I’m an introvert, love alone time so looking forward to being a big girl by flying to Fort Lauderdale, staying overnight and getting on that ship all by myself (been married for 32 years). Just want to chill by the pool with my books, eat when I want to and basically do whatever I want and this a big deal for me.  If I want to talk to other people I will, if I don’t then that’s just fine too. Well, told some members of my family and friends and got so many comments, everything from “aren’t you scared for your safety “, “what are people on the ship going to think when they see you by yourself “, “you will be eating alone?” and my absolute favorite “is everything ok with your marriage??”  I’ve read a lot of threads on Solo cruises, I’m a smart woman who can take care of myself and yet I still can’t believe those comments. Yeah should have kept my mouth shut. Sorry for the long rant 🙄

I understand your rant UKgirl.  I have had similar remarks from families and friends, even though I have been travelling solo since my late teenage years.  I have always been able to look after myself, I sometimes like to meet others and sometimes like to rest and relax alone.  Still, today, I at over 60 years of age, I get the same remarks from some.  I find it very insulting, and consider it to be a form of discrimination.  I wish people would just get on with their own silly lives and leave us alone who prefer to do things different from them.  But I know there are many other worse discriminations in life today.

 

So rant away, and I will rant with you LOL.  You are not alone in your rant.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/3/2020 at 8:34 PM, Ukigirl said:

I’m thinking of mostly Windjammer, not MDR.  Have you done specialty restaurants on your own, question is do you book onboard or just walk in?  

I just finished a 5 day Solo cruise, ate in Chops every night. Bought the dining package. It was great! Had the usual questions & comments, but made it through. I think it’s funny that people say, “I don’t think I could eat in a restaurant by myself.” I feel sad for those people. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would love to take a solo cruise!   I just cant stomach having to pay double.  lol 😞

 

Enjoy yourself!  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2/3/2020 at 8:04 PM, Ukigirl said:

I’m amused by some of the dumb things people have said to me when they found out I’m taking a solo cruise. I’m happily married, hubby and I have gone on at least a dozen cruises so I’m very comfortable with RCL ships. Because of his work schedule he has limited vacation days , most of those will be used for a back to back in November but my office will be closed for a couple weeks in March.  I brought up the idea of my bucket list which includes a solo cruise and he has no problem with me going.  I’m an introvert, love alone time so looking forward to being a big girl by flying to Fort Lauderdale, staying overnight and getting on that ship all by myself (been married for 32 years). Just want to chill by the pool with my books, eat when I want to and basically do whatever I want and this a big deal for me.  If I want to talk to other people I will, if I don’t then that’s just fine too. Well, told some members of my family and friends and got so many comments, everything from “aren’t you scared for your safety “, “what are people on the ship going to think when they see you by yourself “, “you will be eating alone?” and my absolute favorite “is everything ok with your marriage??”  I’ve read a lot of threads on Solo cruises, I’m a smart woman who can take care of myself and yet I still can’t believe those comments. Yeah should have kept my mouth shut. Sorry for the long rant 🙄

Just going to say one thing, HAVE FUN!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First, to echo what most have already said - you are going to have a GREAT time! I love to cruise solo because it often ends up being one of my only opportunities to enjoy a vacation with some peace and quiet! Like you said, if you want to talk to people, you will, if you don't want to - that is also fine... I often have dinner in the MDR by myself, and the food is just as tasty as if someone were there with me.. Sometimes I bring a book. I actually ended up grabbing dinner at Johnny Rockets one night on Mariner back in October while watching the sunset in Nassau.. Nothing fancy, which was a pleasant shift from dinner on a family vacation cruise.

 

I also find that traveling solo can be much less stressful since I am the only person I have to be responsible for - so much easier than having to "count heads" to make sure everyone made it on the plane, or is back on the ship on time, etc.

 

Have a wonderful trip!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, JasonMason said:

First, to echo what most have already said - you are going to have a GREAT time! I love to cruise solo because it often ends up being one of my only opportunities to enjoy a vacation with some peace and quiet! Like you said, if you want to talk to people, you will, if you don't want to - that is also fine... I often have dinner in the MDR by myself, and the food is just as tasty as if someone were there with me.. Sometimes I bring a book. I actually ended up grabbing dinner at Johnny Rockets one night on Mariner back in October while watching the sunset in Nassau.. Nothing fancy, which was a pleasant shift from dinner on a family vacation cruise.

 

I also find that traveling solo can be much less stressful since I am the only person I have to be responsible for - so much easier than having to "count heads" to make sure everyone made it on the plane, or is back on the ship on time, etc.

 

Have a wonderful trip!!!

Wonderful 🙂

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would love to take a solo cruise without my husband.  I’d get the Spa balcony and all the good things that with it and just zen my way through the week, perfect. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People need to stop being so judgmental.   I travel a lot for business by myself and dine alone quite often during that travel.  I couldn’t care less what people think but wonder why anyone would have a negative opinion on it to begin with.  If I were single, a cruise would appeal to me as best way to travel solo.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The biggest challenge for me, dining solo, is finding a polite way to let the waiter know that I’m fine on my own, don’t need special interaction, and that I really just want to read my book or discreetly watch a show on my phone while I eat. Open to suggestions on how to do this diplomatically.

 

Time to myself is a HUGE luxury.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, perditax said:

The biggest challenge for me, dining solo, is finding a polite way to let the waiter know that I’m fine on my own,

Why bother telling him/her anything? Just do whatever you want to do and ignore the staff.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Biker19 said:

Why bother telling him/her anything? Just do whatever you want to do and ignore the staff.


Because I don’t want to be rude when the waiter goes out of his way to try to chat or entertain me when he sees I’m on my own.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ukigirl, Thank you so much for sharing your feelings. I’m beginning to feel like something is wrong with me. Husband is not retired but I am, happy marriage and we cruise 1 or 2 times a year. I so want to take a solo cruise! With a couple of books, my own schedule etc! My DH gets it and thinks it’s great. But I hear so much grief from family & friends.  “Why would you want to go by yourself!!!” Like I am opting for a lobotomy or something! I haven’t booked a solo yet but I will soon. So glad I’m not alone in wanting to cruise solo! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, ryano said:

I would love to take a solo cruise!   I just cant stomach having to pay double.  lol 😞


That's the only part that stinks.  I've been lucky to find a couple "no single supplement" cruises, but they are very few and far between, particularly with Royal.  

I need to find a friend who wants to share a room to split the cost, but not share a cruise together!  LOL

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Forum Jump
    • Categories
      • Forum Assistance
      • SPECIAL EVENT: Q&A with the Quark Expeditions Team!
      • New Cruisers
      • Cruise Lines “A – O”
      • Cruise Lines “P – Z”
      • River Cruising
      • ROLL CALLS
      • Digital Photography & Cruise Technology
      • Member Cruise Reviews
      • Special Interest Cruising
      • Cruise Discussion Topics
      • UK Cruising
      • Australia & New Zealand Cruisers
      • North American Homeports
      • Ports of Call
      • Cruise Conversations
×
×
  • Create New...