Am I A Bad Mom????? Cruise Instead Of Sweet 16 Party

[Elaine515]

MY TITLE IS A JOKE........ I HOPE !!!

 

..

 

My dd Danielle is going to be 16 on July 13th... So, stupidly, I asked her what she wanted to do for her 16th birthday, quite frankly expecting her to say "have a Sweet 16 Party".... Well, noooooooooooooooooooooo

 

Before we go any further, I must have been a bad Mom because Danielle and her 12 year old sister have been cruising since they were literally in my belly... As a matter of fact, we are all Platinum Card Members. So, was I surprised when she said "I want to take my best friends and go on a cruise"....

 

So, we are now working on booking the July 10th Fascination for Danielle, her 3 best friends in one cabin and my other dd (12), hubby and myself in another ...

 

So HELP ME PLEASE.... I did lay down some ground rules....

 

They absolutely positively must be at the dinner table with us every night.

 

They must never ever leave each other alone... i.e, they either must always be the 4 of them or 2 and 2 but never ever 1 and 3.

 

They will be with us while in port.

 

They will be able to use the sign and sail card for soft drinks only.

 

The girls will be 15, 16, 16 and 17. Two of them have already volunteered to sleep on the top bunks. One has never been on a cruise and probably hasn't even seen a cruise ship except in pictures.

 

So, how did I do? Did I forget anything... Please help me to make this a fun / stressfree week...

 

Also, I read somewheres else (and of course when I need it, I can't find it) what do I need from the parents? This part is quite confusing I think... one of them is living with Mom only, Dad's location is unknown, another one is living with Mom but does see her Dad on weekends and the 3rd one is living with both Mom & Dad...

 

Also, Danielle's birthday will fall out on the day at sea. What do you think I can do so that she never forgets her "Sweet 16"???

 

Any and all advice you can offer me will be most appreciated....

 

Elaine :)

 

07/10/2006 Carnival Fascination Western

03/17/2006 Costa Magic Eastern (never ever again Costa)

09/02/2005 Carnival Fascination Bahamas

03/18/2005 NCL Spirit Southern

3/20/2004 Carnival Triumph Western

3/16/2003 Carnival Spirit Exotic W. Caribbean

08/02 NCL Sun

12/21/2001 Carnival Spirit Southern Caribbean

10/15/2000 Carnival Destiny Southern Caribbean

1/31/2000 Carnival Ecstasy Western Caribbean

10/17/1999 Carnival Destiny Western Caribbean

10/98 RCL Grandeur of the Seas

10/18/1997 Carnival Fascination Southern Caribbean

10/6/1996 Carnival Sensation Western Caribbean

10/7/1995 Carnival Imagination Western Caribbean

10/94 Dolphin IV

11/6/1993 Carnival Celebration

11/1/1986 Carnival Carnivale

[Leo Jay]

Have a good talk with ALL of the other parents and go over ev.ery.thing. -- rules/discipline, insurance, room assignments, food allergies, excursion plans, gratuities, spending allowance, emergency contact numbers...

 

Also, Danielle's birthday will fall out on the day at sea. What do you think I can do so that she never forgets her "Sweet 16"???

 

BESIDES taking her THREE BEST FRIENDS on a cruise with you two? This is forgettable?

[bubbles1209]

MY TITLE IS A JOKE........ I HOPE !!!

 

..

 

My dd Danielle is going to be 16 on July 13th... So, stupidly, I asked her what she wanted to do for her 16th birthday, quite frankly expecting her to say "have a Sweet 16 Party".... Well, noooooooooooooooooooooo

 

Before we go any further, I must have been a bad Mom because Danielle and her 12 year old sister have been cruising since they were literally in my belly... As a matter of fact, we are all Platinum Card Members. So, was I surprised when she said "I want to take my best friends and go on a cruise"....

 

So, we are now working on booking the July 10th Fascination for Danielle, her 3 best friends in one cabin and my other dd (12), hubby and myself in another ...

 

So HELP ME PLEASE.... I did lay down some ground rules....

 

They absolutely positively must be at the dinner table with us every night.

 

They must never ever leave each other alone... i.e, they either must always be the 4 of them or 2 and 2 but never ever 1 and 3.

 

They will be with us while in port.

 

They will be able to use the sign and sail card for soft drinks only.

 

The girls will be 15, 16, 16 and 17. Two of them have already volunteered to sleep on the top bunks. One has never been on a cruise and probably hasn't even seen a cruise ship except in pictures.

 

So, how did I do? Did I forget anything... Please help me to make this a fun / stressfree week...

 

Also, I read somewheres else (and of course when I need it, I can't find it) what do I need from the parents? This part is quite confusing I think... one of them is living with Mom only, Dad's location is unknown, another one is living with Mom but does see her Dad on weekends and the 3rd one is living with both Mom & Dad...

 

Also, Danielle's birthday will fall out on the day at sea. What do you think I can do so that she never forgets her "Sweet 16"???

 

Any and all advice you can offer me will be most appreciated....

 

Elaine :)

 

07/10/2006 Carnival Fascination Western

03/17/2006 Costa Magic Eastern (never ever again Costa)

09/02/2005 Carnival Fascination Bahamas

03/18/2005 NCL Spirit Southern

3/20/2004 Carnival Triumph Western

3/16/2003 Carnival Spirit Exotic W. Caribbean

08/02 NCL Sun

12/21/2001 Carnival Spirit Southern Caribbean

10/15/2000 Carnival Destiny Southern Caribbean

1/31/2000 Carnival Ecstasy Western Caribbean

10/17/1999 Carnival Destiny Western Caribbean

10/98 RCL Grandeur of the Seas

10/18/1997 Carnival Fascination Southern Caribbean

10/6/1996 Carnival Sensation Western Caribbean

10/7/1995 Carnival Imagination Western Caribbean

10/94 Dolphin IV

11/6/1993 Carnival Celebration

11/1/1986 Carnival Carnivale

Ok, if you are traveling with someone else's child, you need a notarized statement from the child's parents saying it is ok for them to travel with you. The child also needs a certified birth certificate or better yet passport, and a valid photo i.d. For the parent who doesn't know the Dad's location, is she divorced? Does she have full custody? Might need to call your TA if you used one, or Carnival, for the answer to that one if they aren't divorced. www.singleparent.net is a good spot to look at. Or, get in touch with someone higher up, Dept of Homeland Defense website is good and has lots of information. For the one that has the parents that are divorced that sees her dad every other week-end, would it be difficult to get the dad to sign the notarized letter? The ground rules sound great, safety is always an issue no matter where you are, we all need to use the same common sense about safety no matter where we are at all times. As far as charging the sodas, I would say if they drink a lot of soda to get a soda card. Good luck with everything, let us know what happens! One more thing happy birthday to your DD!:) And noooooooo you're not a bad mom you're giving her what she wants for her birthday! That would have been so cool to have for a sweet 16, wish I could have had it!

[Illinoisgal]

I suggest the soda card instead of using the S&S for soda. At almost 2.00 a can it could get really high quick. Just a thought!

[IrishDolphin]

your bravery is to be admired :p

 

make sure to tell those girls, never, ever leave their cokes out of their sight for a single second, don't need someone slipping in anything (all the safety rules) - and i 100% agree with not allowing them to go off by themselves at port, you just never know

 

now, don't you dare fail to post a review of this situation, we will be waiting, have fun!!!!

[zqvol]

Instead of letting them use the S&S card for soda why noit get them each soda cards, if they are typical teens that will be cheaper any way, then you can block charges on their S&S cards.

 

On the 3 and 1 rule, even though you did not say it I assume that if one of them wants to stay with you or in the cabin taking a nap, etc., the other three can go off together.

 

Set a reasonable night time curfew.

 

Take some seasick meds along just in case.

 

HAVE FUN!

[katie286]

I don't think you're bad at all! I'm doing the same thing!! Only difference is that the mom's of the other Sweet 16 girls are coming along! My daughter is turning 16 as is my neice and my daughter's friend. We all decided to go together and even bring my mother along! The girls will have a great time! We are going on a 5 day cruise and they will remember this much more than a 4 or 5 hour party! What a memory we are giving them! Have a wonderful time!! :)

[bucket_O_beer4john]

Have a good talk with ALL of the other parents and go over ev.ery.thing. -- rules/discipline, insurance, room assignments, food allergies, excursion plans, gratuities, spending allowance, emergency contact numbers...

 

I'd also suggest you arrange for exactly when the girls are going to call home (if at all). I read another post about some mom that was irate when her daughter came home because she never called on a trip.

 

Best thing you can do is have a pre-cruise party with all the girls and all the parents. Then everyone will be on the same page.

[MAO]

don't forget to have clear consequences if they break the rules, and remind them about the drinking policies (they are not 21 yet)

and good luck to you....let us know how it goes cuz I'm taking my DD for her 16th also and some other moms and kids are going would love to hear how it all turns out, scary stuff:eek:

[Laurin612]

Wow, Danielle is a lucky girl! How could you forget a Sweet 16 cruise with three of your best friends?!

 

Tell your waiter about your daughter's birthday, and he or she will make sure that they do something special for her birthday.

 

And I would definitely agree with the others who recommend purchasing soda cards for each of the girls. It will be MUCH cheaper that way!

[KJPG]

No drinking and no going to boys cabins are things I would stress to all of them. Explain that you will be calling their parents if they step out of line.

 

I'd also get them soda cards - that way there won't be any purchases on the S&S cards that you have to deal with.

 

I do like the "Stay in at least a pair" rule - less stress for you.

 

Sounds like fun!

[CuteTheta]

I will think about the rules for a bit.

 

Way back in the day my parents took one of my friends and I for a cruise for my 16th.

 

I would say you could have her room decorated by Carnival. That is a nice touch. Or on the last cruise I was on there was a couple and the husband was celebating his birhtday. The wife went to formalities and ordered a cake to be delivered to their dinner table on the night of his birthday. That could be neat.

[wwakla]

Tell your waiter about your daughter's birthday, and he or she will make sure that they do something special for her birthday.

 

We did this and my cousin was served that nights dessert with a candle in it!!!!

 

If you want a cake you must order and pay for one.:D

 

Have a great cruise! You are a wonderful parent to do something like this.:)

[HurricaneSally]

Wow, lucky kid, but what are you going to do when she graduates from high school? How about a new Ferrari?

[katie286]

I'm doing the cake for the three girls that are celebrating their Sweet Sixteen on that cruise. I believe they will bring it out on Fromal night. I like the idea of decorating the cabin also. Maybe I'll do that too! :)

[bplazo]

We took my daughter and her friend on a cruise for her 16th birthday. I suprised her with a beautiful formal dress she had wanted, we had their hair done in the salon, and a birthday cake.

 

I would be carefull with them, girls that age can be very devious, they did sneak off the ship with some friends they had met. On occasion they became mouthy and did not want to obey curfew. I did not catch them trying to drink but I have heard of teens drinking on board. I know that I probably annoyed them because I checked on what they were doing about every hour. I would not let them out of your sight on any ports!

 

I kind of agree with Sally, I do think that kids today are a little spoiled.

[VOLENS]

We took our DD and a friend for her 17th

 

TA booked their room directly across the hall from ours -

 

All the suggestions so far sound great

 

I have three girls and leashes and harnesses work well

 

They are all teenagers and definitely know more than you do and the best kid in the world is still gonna try to stretch the rules and they're not ALL yours

 

Rememeber the STAFF on the ship does not enforce all of the rules and do not always care about AGE restrictions when serving alcohol...

 

It should be a blast - I agree on the pre-cruise party --- you are assuming a tremendous responsibility and I admire you for doing this for the DD BUT if all parties don't agree to YOUR rules - seriously agree before you leave home --- then you may have problems -- consider leaving them on the dock.

 

 

Some one mentioned in port --- They WOULD not be out of my sight when in port. NEVER EVER - no WAY - You are in a FOREIGN COUNTRY - You are a tourist -- You are not at home -- play it safe

 

Has anyone mentioned Walkie - Talkies - WE use them -they aren't 100% on a ship because they are line of sight and so much metal on the shipbut a great help and really inexpensive now and most cell phones don't work out of the US

 

Well

 

Have BALL -- don't forget the VALIUM and Rolaids - you're gonna need them

 

 

 

Now -- figure out how to be the GRINCH and still let them have the trip of a lifetime...

 

 

john

 

 

22 days till Sail Away on Triumph - West Carib

[ppeckham]

Discuss with the girls a cabin policy. Do not allow them to go into anyone else's cabin except yours.

 

Definitely set a curfew. Be sure you and your husband have access to their cabin. At curfew, check the cabin.

 

On my spring break cruise, we were woken around 3 a.m. by the intercom requesting a named passenger return to her cabin. Later that morning we got the scoop as the captain announced on the intercom that parents and children should know where their party is at all times. Apparently a teen had gone to another person's cabin to hang out. Her parents were in a panic. Can't say I blame them. At that point I reminded my son (16) the cabin policy.

[beaming90]

I think it sounds fun and I hope that you all have a great time!!!! :)

[Lurkyloo]

Make sure they they have several "check in" times at night. You could use walkie talkies, or have them call the room from one of the many house phones around the ship, or actually have them show up at the cabin to check in. Small price to pay for a bit of freedom! ;)

[dachshunddoglover]

You can bring your own decorations and not have to pay the ship to do it. I hear that magnets stick to the outside doors, or just pay the cruise ship to do it. Also - when we went on band trips the chaperones would put blue painters tape on the seals of the doors at midnight. If someone left the room the tape would be off the door. There is no way to get back in and have the tape undisturbed. You might use that as a threat - If you don't follow the rules, I will tape your doors. Just an idea. I am trying to work out a cruise for my daughter's 18th. birthday so I can't wait to hear back on the board how it went. Do write back and let us know. Thanks and have a great time.

[sgriff17]

All I can say is, keep boys away.

 

Also, if I had daughters of that age sweatshirts and jeans would be mandatory while sunbathing out by the pool.

 

(Will also help with my first point)

[Darcy03231]

I took my daughter and a friend on a cruise last year. We brought walkie-talkies and the kids had to check in by walkie talkie every hour and in person every two hours when on board. We ate dinner together every night and spent all of our port time together. I agree with a previous poster, don't let them go off alone in port. Other rules were no giving out your cabin number, no going to someone else's cabin, no one in their cabin, if they left their drink (soft drink) for any reason, get another one. I also brought the old baby monitor and put it in their room so I could keep track of what was going on (I do this when we cruise with just our kids too). After midnight, they had to have an adult with them. Have a great time!!

[kruzin']

:( Don't do it,,,,4 girls under the age of 17 on a cruise is 3 too many...how will you book a cabinfor 4 girls w no adult in it? I think it's a situation looking for trouble...I know your daughter (daughter's)are great kids but believe me once on a ship with the 4 for 5 of them together how quickly their thinking will be compromised..would you take 4 young women to nyc and put them in a separate hotel room ? I think you have not thought all this thru ..what are the mom's and dad's of the friend's thinking? I would never let my daughter go on this cruise if she were asked . Sorry to rain on your cruise but better safe than sorry and don't you ever look and the down side of this situation?

[Jacquelyn11]

I agree with other posters about going over the rules before hand. I would print them up, have each one sign a "contract" that they are aware of the rules you set and intend to keep them. Post it on the inside of the cabin door too. Set up consequences if the rules are broken, and that ALL will be restricted if just 1 misbehaves. Hopefully this will keep them all aware of each other's behavior and keep them safe!

 

Have fun cruzin'

 

Jacquelyn :D