Dining Question

[nevadabadgirl]

My son and I are going on our first cruise in May, a 4 day on the Paradise! We are very excited, but I have concerns in one area. Dining!

 

My son has Asperger's and will be 22 when we sail. My son has a tendency to steer (or abrubtly veer) the conversation to his "obsessions" of the moment. After 18 years of it, I am used to it and can occasionly move the conversation back to more "normal" realms. His latest conversational obsessions are politics :rolleyes:, mobsters :cool:, and sex :o. Not particularly great subjects for "group" dining.

 

When I booked, I booked the anytime dining for this reason. I understand it is easier to get a 2 top that way, and if worse comes to worse, we can change our dining times to only inflict our presence upon one group a day :D

 

Now I read that the 2 tops are close together....*sigh*.

 

Does anyone have any ideas on this? Like how we can get a more "private" table? Please don't suggest room service or the Lido, my son is VERY excited about the dining room and has even reserved his tuxedo for formal night (out of his own disability check, bless him!) We have discussed inappropriate discussions, but I am not sure he'll be able to help himself!

[Prphan2]

After you board, head to the dining room, ask whoever is at the desk if you can take a look at the Anytime Dining Tables and see if there's one that would suit your needs. If so, ask for that table everynight. Good luck! And HAPPY CRUISING!!!

[navybaby1113]

Let the hostess know that you need a table a little further away from everyone else. They should be willing to accomdate you and your son.

[DEBnGAB]

Ive seen the 2-tops on the Paradise and the ones that are the closest together are the bench/chair seat configuration.

 

Ask for a table along the window...those have more elbow room to one side as well.

:)

[nevadabadgirl]

Gotta love this site. Post a question, run some errands, and poof there is your answer :D Thanks so much!

 

We do an all-inclusive every year, and every year I find my son first thing in the morning in the jacuzzi making friends with people (usually grandparent types). His naivete is almost charming. But I do work with the public and know how some people can be. This will make our vacation (and those "some people"s vacation) much better.

 

Thanks once again.

[Martini Mom]

Does he mind if you tell people about his Asperger's? If I knew, I would be more than willing to entertain any of his conversations. I always appreciate it when people tell me their child has ASD, so I can be extra accommodating, but I know this approach isn't for every family. Just my 2 cents. :)

[Cruisin Christi]

Does he mind if you tell people about his Asperger's? If I knew, I would be more than willing to entertain any of his conversations. I always appreciate it when people tell me their child has ASD, so I can be extra accommodating, but I know this approach isn't for every family. Just my 2 cents. :)

 

^^This is what I was going to say. I would rather be told if I was seated next to you. Most people are kind enough to entertain if they know the reason behind the conversation. I know I would.

[nytraveller53]

Does he mind if you tell people about his Asperger's? If I knew, I would be more than willing to entertain any of his conversations. I always appreciate it when people tell me their child has ASD, so I can be extra accommodating, but I know this approach isn't for every family. Just my 2 cents. :)

Me, too :)

[nevadabadgirl]

He doesn't mind, in fact it's a bragging point for him (he likes being a little "different). And while I will definitely tell people, I also know that he can wear thin on some after a day or 2. Also due to some motor skill issues, his table manners aren't always the best. I think for this cruise, a 2 top might be better. I want to see how he handles it all.

 

Of course I am probably worried about nothing. The kid never meets a stranger and will probably be dragging me to someone's table for dinner :D

[treekabird]

I know that can be a challenge. My oldest son (will be 19 on our next cruise) is moderately mentally handicapped and a little autistic. He usually is okay with topics, but never stops talking and thinks everyone is his best friend. I do think most people were pretty kind to him on our last cruise, though. I hope you both have a great time!

[nevadabadgirl]

I should book that same cruise. Our sons sound like 2 peas in a pod! :D

[HendersonKY]

Relax and have fun with your son. Sounds like he has a great father. If anyone looks shocked by any conversation, I am sure a quick explanation will take care of it and if not, don't give those people a second thought! Have a great time!

[nevadabadgirl]

I am his mom, a never married parent. But thank you, I will take the compliment because I play both roles in his life :D

 

Funny I was worried about nothing. I asked him tonight if he would want to eat with strangers or just us.

 

He said in one breath, and I quote, "It depends on how social I feel, but it's a cruise and I'll want to socialize. Besides if I am nice to everyone they will save me a place on the lifeboat if we hit an iceberg."

 

I laughed until I cried. :p

[beddibi]

I am his mom, a never married parent. But thank you, I will take the compliment because I play both roles in his life :D

 

Funny I was worried about nothing. I asked him tonight if he would want to eat with strangers or just us.

 

He said in one breath, and I quote, "It depends on how social I feel, but it's a cruise and I'll want to socialize. Besides if I am nice to everyone they will save me a place on the lifeboat if we hit an iceberg."

 

I laughed until I cried. :p

 

lol, he sounds very smart. I love the things kids say. I hope you two have a wonderful cruise. Don't worry about it, I think you both will have a wonderful time. And hey tell him I would save him a seat in the lifeboat if I ever met him.;)

[cantwait06]

He said in one breath, and I quote, "It depends on how social I feel, but it's a cruise and I'll want to socialize. Besides if I am nice to everyone they will save me a place on the lifeboat if we hit an iceberg."

 

I laughed until I cried. :p

 

 

I LOVE this and I LOVE that he already rented his tux. What an exciting experience for him! I personally would love to sit with your son...I'm sure he is very intelligent and well versed on whatever his current obessions are and that he has some really interesting things to say! I'm also a teacher, but either way I think he sounds like a great kid!

 

That being said, I would go with whatever he is feeling comfortable with...like he said, however "social" he is feeling! At least with anytime dining you can do different things either way! I hope you and your son have an amazing cruise!

[dgreeney]

As long as he doesn't start discussing Sara Pallin and the tea party, he's welcome to sit with me.

[nevadabadgirl]

LOL he might, but then he doesn't like either. And he can tell you for hours why not :D

[mrsraggy]

I think (and hope) that you will find people to be quite open to conversation with your son. I think the anytime dining option was a brilliant stroke on your part. That way, you can move about and find some folks who have the depth to embrace your son's uniqueness, and also move away from folks who can't or won't.

 

My son has some issues that sometimes manifest themselves in awkward ways, but we do cruise and we just try to be really sensitive so as not to step on anyone's toes. I have found most people to be utterly gracious.

 

I hope you have a wonderful trip! God bless!

 

Karin:)

[spohttey]

My 17 year old DD has autism. She will talk your ear off about the Vikings and Dragons in the movie How to Train Your Dragon. She does not like crowds and she gets anxious around other teenagers. For our cruise last year, I contacted the Special Needs Department in advance and arranged for early boarding to avoid the crowds and a table just for the 3 of us in a quiet corner in the MDR to keep the commotion to a minimum. They were happy to accommodate those requests. We have asked for the same opportunities for our cruise on the Dream on Aug 27 and have been told that it won't be a problem.

[socaljo]

Lots of good suggestions here for you. The only thing I can add, is perhaps you two could come up with a "code" word. If you are in a group, and you can "see" him veering into the beyond or your tablemates patience waning, perhaps a quiet "bullseye" from you could give him the awareness to take a breath and regroup. And immediate topic change, i.e., did you ever do archery as a kid? (especially if you actually use bullseye!) :D

 

I hope you both have a great cruise!

[Colorado Kat]

You sound like a great mother. With the options of a quick explanation, I am sure everything will be fine. I know I would enjoy chatting with you both.

[nevadabadgirl]

Thanks so much everyone. I think there are some great ideas here. I really like the one about the early boarding. My son is a worry wart about being late and missing the ship/plane/bus/dr appt and can drive me nuts with that. I will call special needs and see what they can work out.

 

I guess the best thing I can do at this point is to play it by ear, relax and not sweat it. Whatever will be will be, que sera sera.

 

I am really getting excited now! :D