Do you get a guilty feeling if you pull your kids out of school?

[Basfreeman]

I've reviewed most of this thread and I don't think this is the place for me. Being "Childless By Choice", I am not qualified to comment on the traumatic experiences associated with child-rearing and schooling. All I know is that I pay what I consider to be an exorbitant amount of school taxes each year and, except for my own pretty good education, have never received much in return. I used to be able to soothe my feelings by thinking I could at least count on the public schools to keep the kids "off the streets and out of my way" for at least nine months each year, but that's no longer a given, what with Fall Break, Winter Break, Spring Break, Teacher Development (Recuperation?) Days, etc.

 

I will say that I do believe that travel, and exposure to different cultures and environments, is a very important part of a persons overall education.

[WeBeCruisin']

 

Our sweet little peacemaker "can't we all get along?" babe is on a rampage!

 

Good work, Betty!

 

Allen

[parrotthead]

HI>>I was offline for a few days (needed a break) I see this thread is still going strong. ;) I also see it's taken a turn...(for the better maybe??)

My girls did take world geography, but I think it was first year in highschool. Yes, I agree math is taken a front seat to many things...my 11th grader is taking calculis (sp?)...and they lost me way back a few years ago..( 'can you help me with this problem?'..."uh no, sorry"):p

And I know they are very much, 'teaching to the test'...here, in Texas, that is how they decide how much $$$ the districts and indiviual schools get...the schools are ranked..(ie: reconized, accomplished, or blue ribbon, etc) by the scores of the standerdized tests. :rolleyes: oh, well...

[Cruising89143]

I say that if you feel comfortable taking your kids out of school then do it and don't worry about what others on here think about it. Some just love to argue for the sake of arguing.:rolleyes:

[cruzobsessed]

cruisin chick....i came to see what "the fuss" was about......stopped reading after page 2 and jumped to the end to post something. this guy has too much time on his hands. i'm about to go to the "ice cream" thread to further "my education"

[parrotthead]

OMG< is this thread still alive..I was suprised to see it at the top again...:p . (If you really want to see that one poster in action...look on the 'Is soda free" thread...

keeps on going.... that one will fuss about anything!!! ):eek:

PS: still no guilty feelings here!;)

[Cruisin' Chick]

try the ice cream thread on the Princess forum. Is there a hyphen in an@# retentive (I censored it just in case any kids are looking)?

[cruzinjr]

I have felt guilty about taking daughter out of school...but life is an adventure, live it to the fullest! She missed a week in 1st grade when we took her to Canun, she'll miss another week when we go on cruise (3rd grade), plus we've taken her out on a few days here and there for road trips to Massachusetts or indoor waterpark in PA. (infact taking her next week for 2 dys!) Have talked to teachers in every instance and they seemed understanding, gave her homework and assured me her absence would not be detrimental to her success! Bribing her to keep up her grades so she can go on cruise! If the grades slip, she'll be landlocked!

-Jennifer

[Onessa]

Most parents think carefully about the consequences of having a child miss some school for any reason. Most kids can 'afford' to miss a few days when the parents, the teachers, the administration, and the students all work together to make it happen.

 

There are families who do not consider the consequences - case in point, a girl in my DD's 4th grade class has missed over three weeks of classes since mid December due to re-occurring bronchitus (sp??). Now in mid-February, she is being pulled for 8 days of classes for a family vacation (not a cruise). I might question that decision - but since I am neither the parent nor the teacher, it's not my call.

[LM1]

My 3 and 8 year olds are world travelers. Never been a problem with teachers, especially the 8 year old to miss school. Get the homework, classwork ahead, or do it all while on the vacation. Sometimes he even has gotten a special assignment to complete while traveling to share with other students when he returns to school.....about the trip. Teachers always have said my boys are so lucky to have the advantage of traveling so much, and it is an education in it's own right. But, I have friends who tell me their kids don't want to miss school, and that's different. With sports and different commitments that other kids have, this changes things. My kids don't have to deal with that at this time.

[simplyred0714]

I had to laugh when I saw the direction that this thread has taken. I was so worried when I first read it I decided to go ahead and call and talk to his guidance counseler about it now. Her exact words were "What a wonderful and educational opportunity! There will be no problem arranging for a pre-approved absence for this type of absence!" She said the ones they have a problem with are the "my great-aunt Millie's great granddaughter's neice is getting married in Michigan and we just have to be there!". She assured me that even though it will be his senior year his work will be fixed up ahead of time and that the first month of school is mostly review..even at the high school level. After her reaction I am now much more at ease in taking our cruise. My daughter is homeschooled and it will be a homeschooling cruise so I figure there will be plenty of time for my son to do his work anyway...LOL.

 

Julie

Freedom of the Seas, 9/06

[Beachbumsx3]

When my son was in the second grade, we pulled him out of school for a vacation. The teacher was pretty rude to me about the whole thing. I had gone to her in advance, gotten all his work and been very polite about it. This was near the beginning of the school year. By the end of the year, she not only had become my friend, but probably had a better feeling about good parenting and family vacations. She realized that our son's education was important to us and we use every opportunity in life as a teaching moment. While on that vacation, we completed all the required "school work" and found fun ways to share with his class all the neat things he had learned while traveling. We brought back coins from the countries we visited as a souvenir for his classmates. Everyone, including the teacher, loved it! Have a great time with the kids!!

[renata102]

I am having a hard time booking a cruise with my 8yo for a week that he has school. I know he will only be in 3rd grade, and it probably won't prevent him from attending an Ivy League school when he gets older, but I can't help but have this guilty feeling like I am being a bad parent. How do you get past the feeling?

 

 

Funny thing I was just talking to my husband about this (how people feel guilty taking their children out of school for a cruise) and than i came to this site. What we discussed is that taking off a week or two is not going to hurt their studies as long as they are decent students! Our daughter will miss a week of kindergardern. But I rather her experience the WORLD and have wordly knowledge, than have my child sit home every day to go to school. We are going to cozumel. So she is going to see the Mayan ruins (she may be young, but she wants to see the "camals" there). On the ship you can spend hours looking for dophins and whales. Also we will in Key West for a week prior,but also our first port is key west. We have taken our daughter on the bottomless ship tour (we did it last year wither at 3 years old) AND SHE STILL TALKS about the shark that we spotted. THAT MY FRIEND IS AN EDUCATION I NEVER HAD AS A CHILD. okay, so her parents have fun in the mean time. ENJOY YOUR CRUISE!!! with yoour child. It sets up for a future of travel. Of course dont take him out for weeks at a time and/or take him our several times a year. BTW, we plan on contiuing this way of vacationing and taking our children out of shcool.

[Cruisin' Chick]

My daughter is now working on an "autobiographical" report in which each child selects a famous person who has changed the world. They research and write an essay, which they memorize so they can stand in front of the class in costume and talk about "themselves".

 

My girl is doing Sally Ride. Did you know that when she was nine, her father took a year off from working and the family went travelling in Europe. Sally and her sister were homeschooled by their parents. When they returned, Sally skipped a grade.

[cruzincarnival]

I have friends that home-school their children. They can learn in 1 or 2 days what a public school may teach a child in one week. That's taking into consideration the extra time needed in public school for lunch, gym, specials, changing class, recess, study hall, bus travel,etc. I'm not saying that those things are not needing in school but to take a child out of school for a week, the work could probably be completed in a day or two. The exposure to the world for only 1 week out of the school year is well worth it. I say to anyone, GO FOR IT!

[Cruisin' Chick]

A major drawback to homeschooling is that you can run into bureaucracy from your state or local school district. A friend of mine homeschools her three kids and runs into a lot of bureaucracy. And every time she has to drive into downtown LA to deal with it, she can't be teaching her kids.

[cilohtac3]

I have grade-school aged kids and we have always, always taken our family vacations while the kids are in school. 1) it's cheaper, 2) it's less crowded, 3) things don't book up so fast and 4) let's face it, 2 weeks experiencing another part of the world is just more educational than 2 weeks of school. If you feel guilty about the lure of points 1, 2 and 3, think about #4 and your mind will be made up!

 

At our school at the beginning of the year they do ask that families take their vacations during school breaks, but when I have notified them that my kids were going to be out for 2 weeks, they never complained. Some teachers gave homework to do, some didn't, but they all told my kids how lucky they were and wished them a great trip. Often they have had to give a presentation about their trip and it was educational for the other kids, too, to learn a little bit about another part of the world. It has never affected my kids' grades or school performance.

 

My kids do well in school; if I had a child that was experiencing difficulties I am not sure I would do this.

[JudithEM]

I wish I took my kids out MORE when they were younger, but we weren't able to do these trips then. We'd take them out for a couple of days, but there would have been no harm taking them out for a week.

Now, my duaghter is in middle school, and I am more hesitant to take her out. We did take both kids out (other is in 5th) for 2 days before the last break-- it would have been fine except that they were both sick and missed 3 days the previous week! (better than being sick on vacation)

Here in NY where there are so many state assessments in public school -- and then they get subs to teach the kids so that the teachers can grade the assessment -- and there are ridiculous superintendent's days, I don't feel bad about family time. Why did we need two days off between Martin Luther King Day and our February vacation. Why not tack it onto the MLK long weekend or the February break? Those days off were inconvenient for working parents. Taking the 2 days off before the break were important family time as far as I'm concerned -- and we got much better airfare.

Having said that, it is really important to talk to the teachers ahead of time and take work, plan make-up for any tests/quizzes, etc. And make sure you're not missing any state assessments. You'll get a varied response from teachers, but at least they know you care. When my son was in 1st grade, the teacher gave him a huge packet to do. When he was in 4th grade, the teacher said that vacation is always educational and not to worry about the schoolwork.

This year, even the middle school teachers were semi-accommodating. (Of course my daughter neglected to take her math packet with her on the trip, but that's another story.)

So, take them out, but don't ignore the work.

It's hard not to feel guilty when you're kids are young, but once they get older and what they do in school does start to matter (that is, when they're getting to high school), you'll realize that you could have done more when they were younger.

Bottom line: enjoy your family and especially your kids. They are only young once!!!

[Cruisee Q]

Holy Cow! I can't believe what this thread turned into. I came to it because my husband and I just got back from our first cruise (Carnival Valor 2/06). We loved it and are taking another one (Pride) to the Mexican Riviera. We also are taking the kids on a Disney Cruise (during school time) and I have the guilty feeling as well. I was a teacher for 6 years in the best district in my area and have had mixed feelings about taking my kids out of school. I have taken them out before, but only for one day.

 

After reading everyone's replies, just want to say to the original poster... go on your trip, enjoy your family and make memories. That's what I'm going to do! Everyone is going to have their own opinions and that's what makes the world go 'round. Life's too short... enjoy! P.S. Your kids are going to be in school for 16 years. One week is nothing when you look at the big picture.

 

Have a blast!!!

Cruisee Q

[Cruisee Q]

Holy Cow! I can't believe what this thread turned into. I came to it because my husband and I just got back from our first cruise (Carnival Valor 2/06). We loved it and are taking another one (Pride) to the Mexican Riviera. We also are taking the kids on a Disney Cruise (during school time) and I have the guilty feeling as well. I was a teacher for 6 years in the best district in my area and have had mixed feelings about taking my kids out of school. I have taken them out before, but only for one day.

 

After reading everyone's replies, just want to say to the original poster... go on your trip, enjoy your family and make memories. That's what I'm going to do! Everyone is going to have their own opinions and that's what makes the world go 'round. Life's too short... enjoy! P.S. Your kids are going to be in school for 16 years. One week is nothing when you look at the big picture.

 

Have a blast!!!

Cruisee Q

[4merlurker]

Do I feel guilty taking my kids out of school for vacation???

NO WAY!

'Nuff said! :cool:

~Connie

[CruisinFinsUp]

Wow, This is a controversial topic!!

 

First off, I admit that I have NOT read the whole thread - I read the first two pages then skimmed some, then came to post (I've spent too much time online today already :rolleyes: )

 

Couple of points from my experience / observations:

 

-Given that families from all over the world get school time off at different times (ie "spring break" can be from Jan to April), and given that some schools are trying alternative schedules (we have one school with only 5 weeks in the summer and some other 2 week holidays in off-peak times so the kids lose less down time over the summer) you can NEVER assume that parents on a particular cruise are taking their kids out of school - they may be off. Also, this will naturally reduce the weeks in a year that are more "kid-free" on cruises!!!!

 

-In most "real" offices, you CANNOT have everyone off at the same time or exactly when they want to be off. If every parent took March Break off or all their vacation weeks off in the summer, in an office or most any workplace be it a store or restaurant or other, the place would shut down and no work would happen etc etc etc. So, some people MUST take time off during different periods. Once you eliminate all other "no-time-off" periods (ie during a project, during "peak" production times, during a reporting periods, etc etc) that leaves only a limited number of weeks during the year when all staff must SHARE vacation time. Some of that will be DURING SCHOOL. Given the choice of no vacation or taking the kids out of school, I vote for taking the kids out. With proper planning, communication, and proper parent involvement, there should be no problems. Besides its a special experience to travel that they cannot get in school. Unfortunately, in the "real" world it is the job that pays for the vacation, so job requirements get priority over school requirements, especially when school can be more flexible than job!!! With proper parenting, there is no question that school is important, but life is about priorities - and balancing work and family - and that hard decisions must be made and their consequences borne - "you have to do homework on your trip if we are to go at all" is a good lesson to learn. (I don't agree with parents who just take their kids out and don't do any work / learning while away)

 

-An interesting story: When my DH was in about grade 4 or 5, his parents took him out for a trip, and the teacher gave him a package of work. It was a lot of work. They dutifully did it every day while away. When he got back, he found that he had COMPLETED THE TERM IN A NUMBER OF SUBJECTS. So he had "nothing to do" while the other kids did what he was given while away. They continued to take him out pretty much every year in the spring for 2 weeks, til high school ended, and he is now very successful with a very high paying job. I guess it didn't hurt his education at all.

 

-I think that so long as the student is doing well in school, that there are no big test periods during the time off, and that it is planned in advance, it can work very well. Other posters have given specific educational values that I will not repeat here. Clearly, with a student in their last grade before college or some other important year, the costs may outweigh the benefits and the decision should be different. This decision must be made by each family - deciding what is best for their particular situation.

I do not think that the school or the teacher should make this decision - they should CONTRIBUTE to the decision with information about the school year, however, the family must make this decision on their own, not based on "other's opinions"!!!!!

[Cruisin' Chick]

Well said, cruisintoddler!

[katsted69]

When we chose to take our first cruise (counting the days) my kids begged us not to make it during school days because of our schools "principal attendance awards" for the year. We opted just to go on our spring break and if there are bunches of other kids, it just means more new friends for the kids.

 

Anyhow, they will miss 2 days but are still excited. They have their shopping plans for while in port. They are also each planning to decorate a poster board sign and put on their doors (2 cabins both with adult in them too) and have people sign them. People will be on this cruise from everywhere. What a learning experience for them plus, they can take the boards back to school to show everyone.

[the4ofusandallourfriends]

I can't believe this thread is still going....it was here the last trip I was planning with the kids....lol

 

Still no guilt...and still have great kids...

 

I'm staying out this sandbox this round.