Less Complementary - More Pay For use - Fun

[MACE]

Thoughts and opinions on seeing complementary venues being replaced with more up-charging, fee-adding, sometimes at a way-too-high pricing venue, with cost cutbacks:

 

Please allow me to have some fun:

 

You will be able to go online and select the time you will be assigned to row

 

There is now an $150 embarkation fee, however, you can opt out of this by not embarking

 

Pay for your own life boat drill, must bring you own vest

 

Bring your own pool water, no chlorine please

 

Extra charge for bed-bug free bedsheets and linen

 

New charge for bringing your own Charmin Toilet Paper on board

 

Minimal charge in the MDR for salt and pepper shakers

 

Lunch buffets have been replaced with snack vending machines

 

On Alaskan cruises,smoking at night will be encouraged to provide

heat for the ship

 

Discounted weddings will be offered so the thrown rice can be reused for dinner in the MDRs

 

The best wines on the list are now Boone's Farms, Strawberry Hill,and Ripple

 

There will be smaller offerings of Chicken Pot Pie, you'll now have to lick other peoples fingers to get a taste

 

We'll now be selling imitations of fake Rolex's

 

The Garden Cafe will only provide forks for your cereal in order to save milk

 

Cabin air conditioning will be provided by waving around ship provided Popsicle ice cream sticks

 

Swimming pools will be heated for a few hours in the morning to encourage passengers to take a swim rather than a shower

 

Stabilizers will be shut down to save power

(side affect: increased sales of Dramamine)

 

All Casinos will be renamed after the cruise line's Accounting Firm:

Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe

 

Our Casinos will revert to the pull arms on the slots to help power the generators

 

Our Win a Cruise Bingo will be replaced by "Win 10% off a Cruise Bingo"

 

The Captain's Cocktail party will be replaced by ration-book luncheons

from the vending machines

 

Forget Finger Sandwiches, its now make-do-and-mend afternoon tea

 

In cabin TVs will only have two channels: off and on

 

In all our Haven Suites, when someone rings your doorbell, you have to yell, "ding dong!

 

Ship's Doctor will be replaced by Obama Care (ouch!)

 

MDR desserts are the left over chocolates that used to be on the pillows

 

Elevators are replaced by deck-climbing-walls

 

Looking forward to our Breakaway Cruise

-Humor: Don't Cruise Without it!

Edited November 10, 2014 by MACE

[gurglegargle]

Hahaha! Love it!

[beerman2]

You forgot you will have to put .25 cents in the slot in order to use the toilet. Maybe .50 now,

[hpecorari]

Thoughts and opinions on seeing complementary venues being replaced with more up-charging, fee-adding, sometimes at a way-too-high pricing venue, with cost cutbacks:

 

Please allow me to have some fun:

 

 

Pay for your own life boat drill, must bring you own vest

I'd be more than happy to skip this. Been there done that many many times!

 

Extra charge for bed-bug free bedsheets and linen

Never ever had a problem with this! LOL

 

New charge for bringing your own Charmin Toilet Paper on board

I'd pay for this in a heartbeat!

 

Minimal charge in the MDR for salt and pepper shakers

Ohhh, I'm a salt fanatic. But....I'd just bring my own!

 

Lunch buffets have been replaced with snack vending machines

Hmmm will the cold food be cold and the hot food be hot?

 

Our Casinos will revert to the pull arms on the slots to help power the generators

This would save me money as it takes longer to play!

 

In cabin TVs will only have two channels: off and on

LOL - that's pretty much all they're good for now anyway

 

Looking forward to our Breakaway Cruise

-Humor: Don't Cruise Without it!

 

The others were cute also! Thanks for the smile.

 

Harriet

[missdixie]

These are funny. Could be some in the near future.

Thanks

[cage keeper]

Rotfl. :d:d:d

[gosport11]

dont give em ideas:):)