Getting Passport for Underaged Child when Ex-Spouse is being Uncooperative

[evolutiondob]

I'm not sure if this is the proper forum to post this question but since I will be sailing on Freedom of the Seas I figured I would post here.

I have been trying for over two months now to get my ex-husband to go with me to the post office so that I can apply for a passport for my 11 year old daughter. Well, he's a control freak which is one of the reasons why I'm no longer with them. But, I digress, sorry. Anyway, he continues to say he'll get back to me and it's been months now. Well, I sent him an e-mail on Friday basically saying that I understand that there is a back up in receiving passports and I would really like to start the process now so that I will have my daughter’s passport well before my November 18 sailing. Well, his response was, and I quote "We have discussed. Please don't ask again. I will let you know. Thanks."

I'm concerned that he's going to drag this on until there is an issue with me getting the passport in time for the cruise. I hate to say it but he's the type of man that will ruin his kids' vacation just to spite me.

So, is there anyway around having the second parent sign off on the passport application if they are being uncooperative? I don't want to lie on the passport and say he's absent or deceased, but at the same time I hate that he is controlling when I can get this process started. I've looked at the passport rules and I don't see any information for cases like this. Any information or advice you have will be helpful.

[StormGoddess]

By your question, I am assuming that you have joint custody of you daughter. If this is the case, then I would take it legal. He doesn't have to be present to sign, he can use a notarized letter granting permission for the passport. But it sounds like he just doesn't want to allow it period. A mediator in the form of a legal rep/jugde may make him move his backside a bit, especially if there is no valid reason for her to not get the passport.

 

If you have sole custody, all you need is the divorce papers that say as much, and not his signature at all.

 

Good luck!

[evolutiondob]

Yeah, if I can't get him to show up the post office, he's definitely not going to take the time and expense to have a notary confirm his permission to the passport. Ugh, I hate to go through a legal route but I guess if I have to, I might need to start now.

[Lisichka]

I think you and I have the same ex. Luckily I was granted sole legal and physical custody.

 

If he continues to refuse, I would take the legal route as well (although, if he is truly like my ex, that would make it worse).

 

Men.....

 

[SomeBeach]

Sorry you have to go through this. Unfortunately, in such cases, the children are the ones to suffer.

Instead of letting anger build up, take the matter to your lawyer and have him send the letter. Make sure the ex understands he'll pay the expense if you should have to go that route. Control freak or not, he should not do this to your daughter.

[cruisin from florida]

Well, if you know where he is (office, home?) YOU could go through the expense and inconvenience of sending a notary WITH the appropriate paperwork to HIM.

 

I am a notary, and I used to do closings for various mortgage companies. I would take all the documents, witness and notarize all the signatures, and mail the docs back in. Cost was about $75.

 

You could send the notary over to his house when your daughter is there. If he refuses to sign, that would likely be clear evidence of his lack of cooperation if you end up before a judge.

[lgfromdg]

If you're cruising in 2007, she won't have to have a passport so you'd be ok for this year with just her birth certificate. I don't know if you would have to have his parental consent for taking her out of the country on the cruise though.

[Kaluha and Cream]

Unfortunately, you also have to have his permission (signed by a notary) that you are allowing her to go out of the country with you on the specified dates. Good Luck.

[Emi's Mom]

Micki is right, don't fight with the ex, let your attorney do the talking, and if he'll have to pay the legal fees, that makes it all the better. Sorry for what you're going through, I've been there :( .

[helicopter]

According to RCCL you only need one parents signature for going with another adult (not related), wonder why you would need his if she's going with the mother:confused:

[caitlyn20]

Unfortunately, you also have to have his permission (signed by a notary) that you are allowing her to go out of the country with you on the specified dates. Good Luck.

 

We just took my granddaughter on a cruise in November. Her father would never have signed permission, simply because he was jealous that he wasn't going anywhere. He threatened to have my daughter arrested for "kidnapping" when she returned because he was going to miss ONE weekend (blowing smoke...hoping to ruin her vacation..nothing ever happened). They did not ask for proof that her father was ok with us taking the baby on a cruise.

 

Have things changed that much since November? I wonder because we are planning another cruise before the year is out, and I'd hate to be stuck at the port.

[evolutiondob]

Yeah, we have joint physical custody - therein lies the problem.

[SomeBeach]

We just took my granddaughter on a cruise in November. Her father would never have signed permission, simply because he was jealous that he wasn't going anywhere. He threatened to have my daughter arrested for "kidnapping" when she returned because he was going to miss ONE weekend (blowing smoke...hoping to ruin her vacation..nothing ever happened). They did not ask for proof that her father was ok with us taking the baby on a cruise.

 

Have things changed that much since November? I wonder because we are planning another cruise before the year is out, and I'd hate to be stuck at the port.

 

You would be wise to clarify taking the child. He may decide to make good on that threat at some point.

It is better to error on the side of following the rules than breaking it.

[Maxiecat3]

According to RCCL you only need one parents signature for going with another adult (not related), wonder why you would need his if she's going with the mother:confused:

 

I believe, if you are divorced, with joint custody (as I am), you are supposed to have the absent parent sign allowing you to take the child out of the country. I have done this on our cruises. The one signature requirement is if I remember correctly, is for when you are taking another minor (this cruise we are taking my DD friend). We would only need 1 signature which also grants me permission to seek medical attention if needed.

Gregg

[Sue L]

this is right from the passport site,

 

 

. Present Parental Application Permission Documentation

 

(for minors under age 14)

 

1. Both parents must appear together and sign or

 

2. One parent appears, signs, and submits second parent's notarized statement of consent authorizing passport issuance for the child (a notarized Form DS-3053, Statement of Consent: Issuance of a Passport to a Minor Under Age 14 , or a notarized written statement with the same information on a sheet of paper from the non-appearing parent) or

 

3. One parents appears, signs, and submits primary evidence of sole authority to apply (such as one of the following):

 

* Child's certified U.S. or foreign birth certificate (with translation, if necessary) listing only applying parent; or

* Consular Report of Birth Abroad (Form FS-240) or Certification of Birth Abroad (Form DS-1350) listing only applying parent; or

* Court order granting sole custody to the applying parent (unless child's travel is restricted by that order); or

* Adoption decree (if applying parents is sole adopting parent); or

* Court order specifically permitting applying parent's or guardian's travel with the child; or

* Judicial declaration of incompetence of non-applying parent; or

* Death certificate of non-applying parent.

 

If none of the above documentation is available, the applying parent/guardian should submit a Form DS-3053: Statement of Consent: Issuance of a Passport to a Minor Under Age 14 .

 

NOTE:

 

A third-party in loco parentis applying on behalf of a minor under the age of 14 must submit a notarized written statement or affidavit from both parents or guardians authorizing a third-party to apply for a passport. When the statement or affidavit is from only one parent/guardian, the third-party must present evidence of sole custody of the authorizing parent/guardian.

[Spurs Fans]

Have you attorney file a Motion in Court. Should only take a few days. Get the Judge to approve the application for a passport with only one parent and you are set. Take a certified copy of the Order to the passport office, pay your money and you are on your way.

[AdMaven]

Although you may not have to have a passport on a cruise, RCI CS told me it is strongly suggested you have one in the event you have to fly home for an emergency, miss the boat, etc. You cannot board an airplane without one.

 

I hope you get this resolved.

[evolutiondob]

Thank you all for your tips and suggestions. I do have her original birth certificate so I may either ask him to sign an affidavit or just show up at the post office with her myself and hope that there are no questions.

[zqvol]

Sorry, but he has an absolute right to refuse to allow a passport to be issued, and it is doubtful that any court will force the issue. If you cannot resolve it with him then you are not cruisng until your child is 18.

[Lisichka]

Sorry, but he has an absolute right to refuse to allow a passport to be issued, and it is doubtful that any court will force the issue. If you cannot resolve it with him then you are not cruisng until your child is 18.

 

I am pretty sure he would have to show cause for wanting to refuse a passport for the daughter. He can not decide he doesn't want for her to have a passport 'just because'.

[Trainman-2]

Get a lawyer!

 

This may be your chance to have your joint custody modified so you have sole custody and he has only visitation.

 

This sounds like a problem that is not going to go away until it is fixed!

[SheriNtexas]

I am pretty sure he would have to show cause for wanting to refuse a passport for the daughter. He can not decide he doesn't want for her to have a passport 'just because'.

 

 

I agree completely! To the OP, i would call your lawyer immediately and let him/her handle this for you. It's things like this that you have a lawyer around in the first place!:) I'm sorry your ex is being a horses butt over this, but surely he can't keep you from cruising with your child until she is 18! Call your lawyer ASAP! Oh, and FWIW, please don't wait to apply for your passport, do it as soon as you get this legal matter cleared up with your ex! The passport agency is backed up and i bet it will only get worse as the year goes on! There is no longer any such thing as having plenty of time to do it! Good luck and I hope you get this cleared up soon!!:)

[Maxiecat3]

I agree with the above posters. Get this problem resolved LEGALLY. If you try to take the cruise with just the BC, and I am assuming your ex knows the particulars of the cruise (ie RCI-Date-Ship), being the butthead that he sounds, he could call RCI and report that his ex is trying to take a cruise with his daughter without his permission. I wouldn't want to take the chance of showing up at the pier and your reservation being flagged for permission letter and then being denied boarding.

Gregg

[MissKise]

Have your attorney handle this matter. If he is this relunctant to have a passport issued, I can't imagine how he will agree to your cruise. Has he said he agreed to let her go?

 

All your ex has to say is that he is afraid you are taking her out of the country so that he can't see her. No Judge would force him to allow the passport. And the cruise would be out the window also.

 

If this was my cruise, I would make sure I had things in place way ahead of time. I have doubts that he is going to allow any part of this. And he is fully within his rights to not allow it. Which sucks for you....

 

Good luck, call your legal aid and make things happen soon.

[bankonus]

To the OP, he cannot just refuse to sign, he has to have a valid reason not to sign. Been there, and done this. Just a quick letter from the courts that filed our divorce decree, asking for signature, or book a court date and that was all it took. Now I just send the appropriate documents to him (and yes you need both the passport permission, and the consent to travel form) and it usually gets done within the week. Usually having a court ask gets the ball in motion. I have been on cruises where they asked for the consent to travel form and some that don't. Don't chance it! It would be awful to be left at the dock, as he obviously couldn't send you a faxed notorized copy in an hour!

Don't feel bad if you have to ask the court for help. You are not bogging down the court system, that is what they are there for. It is a pretty straight forward procedure for them. There are people who handle these things all the time. BTW- I noticed you are in Manassas, VA. We moved to Colorado from Woodbridge!!:p Good luck!!