did you wean a child before cruising?

[sgttami]

I'd be the last person to question anyone's parenting skills but from my prior quote, I just never realized that BF was still done once a child was 3 or 4...!!

 

Is this new??

 

On one occasion our friend was still feeding her son, via the breast, almost 5, and almost as tall as she was! ( I swear!!) We were at an outdoor party and he was draped across her lap sucking away. There were kids the same age as he and they were like.."WHAT'S HE DOING????" It was really embarrasing for everyone.

 

I would never give a BF mom a second look when feeding an infant, but a child ready to go to school would certainly gain my attention if it was done in a public place.

 

Bottle vs. breast? I don't know. Again, a personal choice. I wouldn't want my child on a bottle or a breast once he was 3 or 4 years old!!

[Branwen]

I just wanted to add that while I fully and wholeheartly support breastfeeding, I am personally not comfortable with older children who breastfeed. I have a friend who is still nursing her child at age 4 and while I don't agree with it I respect my friend's right to raise her child as she wants. I think that up to age three is perfectly acceptable for nursing but after that I'm not so sure. I feel this way about the bottle as well.

 

:)

[rebeccalouise]

Pediatricians alway say that kids should be able to drink from a cup by the age of one year old. At this point they are eating solids foods also and milk- while still a staple isn't their only source of sustinance.

 

Breastfeeding is without a doubt the best form of milk for kids. Breastfeeding is beneficial for kids up to the age of two. But most kids wean themselves by one year.

 

So when I hear tales of kids nursing for longer than that- I feel that they haven't reached the proper benchmarks. They should be done with the oral stage by 2 and move on to the anal stage. These sound like weird words but read up parents. You'll see that I am not being a "know it all".

 

I have two boys that are well adjusted, social adept kids. It would be weird if they were still in diapers at age 6 and equally weird if they are nursing after the age of 2.

[Workmom2]

I really think you are right. Plus, all of a sudden he's becoming super sweet and polite about nursing, so I'm thinking weaning isn't so important right now anyway!

 

My daughter was 3 years 9 months when she weaned. Those were marvelous years for us! And I truly think that it had a huge impact on who she is!

 

 

Just curious about what "sweet and polite" and "huge impact" mean?

I did nurse both my childrean and did not expierence what you are explaining here. I am just asking, not trying to spark a huge flame or anything.... did I miss out on something?

[aimeebd]

"Is this new?"

 

Nope, pretty sure that breastfeeding has been going on since the beginning!

 

For many reasons, most toddlers who are still nursing do not nurse in front of you. I know that most of my family had no idea my son was still nursing at 3. I wasn't trying to hide it or anything, but he only nursed at home. If you met us walking down the street (or on a cruise) how would you expect to know what he ate as an infant, let alone how long he ate it for??

 

I can't say I have ever thought much of Freud, and I know that my kid age 4 1/2 is very independent. He doesn't need need his mommy all the time- isn't afraid of social situations and sleeps through the night, and I think psychology has come a long way in the past 100 years!

 

Those kooks at the American Academy of Pediatrics recommend that "Breastfeeding should be continued for at least the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child... Increased duration of breastfeeding confers significant health and developmental benefits for the child and the mother... There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer." (AAP 2005)

[lexxity]

Rebbeccalouise you are being a know it all. You say your child had a dummy until they were 3?

 

WHO advice is to get rid of it by age one, same for bottles. Do read up on it.:rolleyes:

 

Breastfeeding yur child for longer is better for many reasons, social skills being one of them. It helps them to know Mummy is always there, but they can still go off and do their own thing.

 

I would never criticise anyone for bottle feeding, sorry if my last post insinuated this. I meant I don't like to see a three year old still using a bottle all the time. My friend had terrible postnatal depression and bottle feeding gave her a better chance to recover as other people could help her to look after her little boy.

[Nliedel]

 

Don't baby a toddler- accept the fact that they have transcended the oral stage. You aren't helping them and I doubt that it creates a good atmosphere at home or at school for a kid.

 

 

Good for you for being the perfect parent, Rebbecca, but honestly, you are not an expert in child rearing, and you are pushing your personal agenda on others. You feel the child has not reached their proper benchmarks? I can't even believe an adult is judging someones parenting based on a few sentences in Cruise Critic. You have first hand knowledge of this? Perhaps you would like to share what I did wrong to have a child with autism. Cause you sure seem to know what's the "Right" way to do things in every situation.

 

It seems the mother is someone who is trying child led weaning. It's not about the parents need to feel love. It's about letting the child decide when it's best to wean. There is a lot of good evidence out there that this practice is healthy and is actually the norm in other parts of the world

 

As for Freud, he was someone who was very quick to blame the parent for any issue the adult had. Sometimes we have to just accept that we are the ones who have the issue and mom and dad had nothing to do with it. Furthermore, Freud's work has been seriously disputed in recent years. He is no longer considered the definitive expert on the subject. At least according to the people who run the Foster Licensing classes I've taken.

 

Unless this is a very odd situation, the child can drink from a cup, and eat solid food. It's about bonding as much as nutrition and the child's need to bond and feel secure. That's why it's child led. It's quite common here in, Ann Arbor, MI. College town and can be progressive. Some of the play groups my two and four year olds are in have several other children that are nursing in them still.

[rebeccalouise]

Some kids do nurse until the age of 4. My bias is personal and I appologized to any one offended.

 

Just to set the record straight- I was speaking only to the needs of the child and their ability to go to the next stage. I don't care if someone nurses in private or in public. I really didn't care about any stigma where that is concerned.

 

To each their own. If you think it is necessary to nurse until age 4- have at it.

[OnTheBrink]

Okey dokey then! It's the mother vs. mother thing here, I see. Hate that, but totally used to it!

 

I have been nursing one or two children non-stop for over 6 years. I've heard it all. A few years ago I would have gotten into a heated debate about all of this, but I've mellowed quite a bit. Regardless, I'm nursing my 3 year old, and am happy that way. He's not at all limited by our relationship. He goes to preschool, has slumber parties with his cousins, is almost done potty training, and does normal 3 year old stuff. And he nurses. Actually, I think nursing 3 year olds are quite normal!

 

I think maybe it's wise to end this. Anyone else?

[Nliedel]

Would have, nursed em if I could have. I went for almost a year on the exclusive pumping. Did it till I got to the point of hating the pump.

 

As for ending the discussion. Once the genie is out of the bottle, on these threads, it's out. Sort of like trying to stop a frieght train. If it's upsetting you, then the best thing to do is unsubscribe. I do that a lot. You just don't see it anymore.

[erdooley]

I'm new to these boards but already I can predict when there's a post that could potentially start a debate, there's always going to be rebeccalouise starting it. Please, when there's a poster just asking a question, if you have an answer, answer it. Don't start stating your opinion. Did the poster ask: "Do you think it's okay to still be nursing my 3 1/2 year old?" NO, she didn't! So mind your own beezwax! Jeez, Louise!

[GAPaige]

Just wanted to offer a kudos to the OP for doing such a great thing for your child.

 

We are sailing in October and my babe will only be 13 months and of course we will still be nursing. My middle child self-weaned a little before her third birthday and it was actually on vacation (land based). She was at the point of only nursing before naps and bed. She was sharing a room with her sister on that vacation and was so excited to go to bed that she didn't want to nurse down. She did nurse a few times after we got home, but not much. I was really surprised it happened like that, but she got to a point where she was done and we were both at peace about it.

 

I think you should follow your child's lead on weaning before you cruise. If you think he would handle it OK, then by all means go for it. If you think he might like the comfort nursing brings in a strange place/situation, then consider waiting. And remember you can always go back to nursing if weaning isn't working for you. Your milk isn't going to dry up that fast.

[riftara]

Kids have an oral fixation that last normally from birth to age 2.

Then the child moves to the anal fixation- meaning control of bowel movements. They shouls have gotten past the oral fixation at this point.

 

My kids were allowed a bottle until age two- which we donated to the garbage man- bye, bye bottles. Then pacifiers I allowed at nap and bedtime until the age of 3. Then bye, bye pacifiers.

 

 

Wow, I wasnt going to add to this, but this a a VERY FREUDIAN way of looking at things. Just because Freud thought this way, doesnt mean that it is accepted practice anymore. Was when your eldest was a baby, MAYBE, but not anymore.

 

As for Freud, he was someone who was very quick to blame the parent for any issue the adult had. Sometimes we have to just accept that we are the ones who have the issue and mom and dad had nothing to do with it. Furthermore, Freud's work has been seriously disputed in recent years. He is no longer considered the definitive expert on the subject. At least according to the people who run the Foster Licensing classes I've taken.

 

Exactly!!

 

Freud is no more.

 

As for the OP, I think you should either do it long before the cruise, or wait until after. Looks like you plan on waiting until after. Though he may wean on the cruise :)

 

I really wish I had been able to. I didnt produce, oatmeal, herbs, tea, nothing helped. She was more interested in sleeping through the night than nursing every two hours. Makes me sad, kudoos to you for extended breastfeeding!

[BethCarp]

Did the poster ask: "Do you think it's okay to still be nursing my 3 1/2 year old?" NO, she didn't!

Well she sort of did. Come on, the OP knew what she was getting into. This isn't a parenting board or a LLL board. This is a cruise board. She can phrase the question anyway she wants, but breastfeeding has NOTHING to do with cruising. There was no need to ask that question here except to stir the pot, especially mentioning the age of her child. She's a LLL leader and she feels she needs to ask a question about breastfeeding here? Whatever. She opened herself up to debate and critique.

[sas80]

Would have, nursed em if I could have. I went for almost a year on the exclusive pumping. Did it till I got to the point of hating the pump.

 

Then there's the rest of us (me) who are O-L-D and our bodies are just not going to make milk like they would if I was 10 years younger.....

 

Every few weeks I see an ounce or two of milk vanish from my volume, never to be seen again...even with fenugreek! :(

[OnTheBrink]

There was no need to ask that question here except to stir the pot, especially mentioning the age of her child. She's a LLL leader and she feels she needs to ask a question about breastfeeding here? Whatever. She opened herself up to debate and critique.

 

I didn't do it to stir the pot. If I wanted to do that, it would have been much more fun to post on a different forum. But the Family Cruising forum seemed like a perfect place.

 

I don't think it was in appropriate at all. Is it inappropriate to ask on this board about how to mix your formula on the cruise? What about what diapers to use? What about sleeping arrangements for kids? Or whether or not to let the kids stay up late or eat junk food or whatever? These are all very much cruise related things if you are traveling with little ones.

 

Trust me - I get plenty of chances to stir the pot in real life and get my fill of debate that way!

 

Oh, btw - I'm not uncomfortable with this thread. I just meant that the conversation was really going nowhere and maybe was upsetting others. I really didn't mean that to happen!

[crusinmama06]

No, this is nothing new. I have mentioned before that I have a mom's online group and there are many moms there still bf their 3 year olds. It's a choice that works for THEIR family. And no their kids aren't scarred for life or anything. ;)

 

Now, back to the OP's question, I would not wean before the cruise only because I DID wean my youngest before our Disney Cruise. I had to go into the hospital for some testing and the meds they were giving me were not good for the baby. So I weaned. Then 2 weeks later we went on the Disney Cruise and thje poor kid ended up catching something that sent her into a seizure.

 

I KNOW that it might not have made a difference and she would have gotten the virus anyway but there is always this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I could have protected her with more antibodies if I had just continued to bf until after the cruise.

 

So stick to what works. And have a great cruise!

[sgttami]

I really must say that I did not know that some children BF for so long and I'm glad to be aware of that because one day, if I am lucky enough to be a grandmother, I will have some insight on the subject.

 

On a lighter note, I wouldn't want to be weaned from anything that I enjoyed BEFORE a cruise!! I'll compare it to waiting till the cruise is over before I'd start a diet or give up fruity cocktails! I'd be miserable the whole trip...

 

Good luck!!!

 

 

 

 

 

Pam

[sas80]

I don't think it was in appropriate at all. Is it inappropriate to ask on this board about how to mix your formula on the cruise?

 

If I want to "mix my formula", I have my husband shake my boobs for a moment or two...or threee!!!! :p

 

What about what diapers to use?

 

I just use the pool...saves money on wipes!

 

What about sleeping arrangements for kids?

Sleep under the bed!

 

Or whether or not to let the kids stay up late or eat junk food or whatever?

 

I do this, and then I shut them out of the room and tell them to run it off in the hallway while they scream real loud!

[rebeccalouise]

No, this is nothing new. I have mentioned before that I have a mom's online group and there are many moms there still bf their 3 year olds. It's a choice that works for THEIR family. And no their kids aren't scarred for life or anything. ;)

 

Now, back to the OP's question, I would not wean before the cruise only because I DID wean my youngest before our Disney Cruise. I had to go into the hospital for some testing and the meds they were giving me were not good for the baby. So I weaned. Then 2 weeks later we went on the Disney Cruise and thje poor kid ended up catching something that sent her into a seizure.

 

I KNOW that it might not have made a difference and she would have gotten the virus anyway but there is always this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I could have protected her with more antibodies if I had just continued to bf until after the cruise.

 

So stick to what works. And have a great cruise!

 

You made a very good point about the ammunities. Thanks for posting. Sorry again for spouting out about nursing. I guess it just is odd to me but that doesn't make me right. I just know that most kids are encouraged to stop the use of a bottle by age one- so I just wondered what the difference is between that and nursing. But obviously there are some good points to be made for nursing longer.

[Kerry's Girls]

I didn't read through the pages of posts here - I can only imagine. But, in answer to the OP's question, I've dealt with this kind of question twice with my own girls because we travel for their birthdays. For their first birthday, I wanted to drop their bottles and for the second birthday, I wanted to lose the pacifiers. In both cases, I waited until we returned from the cruise so they would have their little comforts and go to sleep more easily in the different environment. It made for a much more peaceful cruise for us (and those around us!).

 

Have a great time!

 

Best,

Mia

[sas80]

Now, back to the OP's question, I would not wean before the cruise only because I DID wean my youngest before our Disney Cruise. I had to go into the hospital for some testing and the meds they were giving me were not good for the baby. So I weaned. Then 2 weeks later we went on the Disney Cruise and thje poor kid ended up catching something that sent her into a seizure.

 

I was under the impression that YOU actually had to have the illness yourself, and thus be actively producing antibodies to it, before you could pass those immunities off to your baby in your breastmilk, and thus keep your baby healthy..... :confused:

 

Typically my son gives ME the cold...which is why my antoibodies dont do him one bit of good...he already has the illness.....

 

right?

[OnTheBrink]

I was under the impression that YOU actually had to have the illness yourself, and thus be actively producing antibodies to it, before you could pass those immunities off to your baby in your breastmilk, and thus keep your baby healthy..... :confused:

 

Typically my son gives ME the cold...which is why my antoibodies dont do him one bit of good...he already has the illness.....

 

right?

 

Actually, no. Before baby shows any signs of being sick, mom's body is already aware of the illness and is creating the antibodies. It's super cool, actually! In the baby's little membranes in the mouth, tiny little messengers are created that say "Illness on the way! Get to work, Mom!" Then, when the baby is at the breast, that message is literally passed through the nipple and into the mom's system. Then, her body starts creating the special blend of milk to help fight the illness!

 

This only works if the baby actually nurses AT the breast. It can't be communicated through bottle feeding, even of expressed human milk.

[crusinmama06]

Actually, no. Before baby shows any signs of being sick, mom's body is already aware of the illness and is creating the antibodies. It's super cool, actually! In the baby's little membranes in the mouth, tiny little messengers are created that say "Illness on the way! Get to work, Mom!" Then, when the baby is at the breast, that message is literally passed through the nipple and into the mom's system. Then, her body starts creating the special blend of milk to help fight the illness!

 

This only works if the baby actually nurses AT the breast. It can't be communicated through bottle feeding, even of expressed human milk.

 

See, I did cause her to have a seizure...major mommy guilt now. ;) :p

[merela]

The best way to wean a 3YO is to go cold turkey. Kids at this age nurse for comfort and familiarity. If you feel uncomfortable nursing on the cruise, then this is the best time to wean. Don't feel apologetic or feel the need to get affirmation from us. When you feel it's the right time to wean, then go for it.

 

If you decide to nurse on the cruise, I would suggest that you do it in your cabin (rather than in any public spaces), so you won't get unwantd comments from other passengers.

 

I nursed on the cruise when my youngest was 20M old, but I was sitting in the dining room with the rest of my family. With a blanket over my shoulder, I nursed discretely. But most of the time, I nursed in my cabin.