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what ever happen to respect?


PIED PIPERS

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It is always disturbing to see rude behavior whether on a ship or in our everyday lives. A few weeks ago after Hurricane Ike, gas prices shot through the roof and I witnessed the most horrible behavior in gas lines and treatment of convenience store clerks. Really, these people were making what, $8 an hour and had no control whatsoever over the situation.

 

There is absolutely no excuse for a sound minded person to treat another human being as less than. That being said, we are dealing with my DH's mom's steady decline. I respectfully disagree with the poster who said personality traits are magnified by Alzheimers. My MIL was once the sweetest, kindest person I knew, now she is hateful and unbearable. I am very sad that some of the people she mistreats today never knew the wonderful lady she was.

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My mother is 85 years old and she joined us last year on our Oosterdam cruise. When we went on shore excursions she opted to stay on board and enjoy the ship (she uses a walker and felt comfortable staying on the ship). She would tell us how nice the buffet staff was.... they would come to her and ask her if she'd like something to eat or drink. My mother would tell them to make a plate of "whatever they thought was good" as well as a cup of coffee. They would bring the food to her and yes, my mother would tip them a dollar or two for doing that. Believe me, whenever my mother walked through the buffet she was treated like a queen :)

 

One thing though I've noticed as my mother gets older is that her "edit button" isn't working as well as it used to. She will say what's on her mind and since she wears hearing aids it's usually said too loud!!! That can be embarassing at times :eek:

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One thing though I've noticed as my mother gets older is that her "edit button" isn't working as well as it used to. She will say what's on her mind and since she wears hearing aids it's usually said too loud!!! That can be embarassing at times :eek:

 

I think you nailed it.

 

It's like kids and older ( whatever that means) people say the darndest things.

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My mother is 85 years old and she joined us last year on our Oosterdam cruise. When we went on shore excursions she opted to stay on board and enjoy the ship (she uses a walker and felt comfortable staying on the ship). She would tell us how nice the buffet staff was.... they would come to her and ask her if she'd like something to eat or drink. My mother would tell them to make a plate of "whatever they thought was good" as well as a cup of coffee. They would bring the food to her and yes, my mother would tip them a dollar or two for doing that. Believe me, whenever my mother walked through the buffet she was treated like a queen :)

 

One thing though I've noticed as my mother gets older is that her "edit button" isn't working as well as it used to. She will say what's on her mind and since she wears hearing aids it's usually said too loud!!! That can be embarassing at times :eek:

 

My Mom just turned 85 herself, She never really had an "Edit Button" to begin with *LOL* , so its getting even worse :)

 

When I am out with her I always tell her to walk a few paces away from me, because one day someone is going to take a shot at her, and I don't want to take a bullett for something she said *LOL*

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Unfortunately we can't know if the "milk" lady's conduct was do to dementia.

 

What I do know is that our culture has changed. Pay attention to some of the tv commercials these days and you will be appalled. Rudeness and lying are promoted as being cool and are used to sell products. My best friend struggles to teach her children manners and values against the constant barrage of what they see and hear inside and outside their home. Many parents not only don't teach these things, they actively show by example the opposite to good manners and values.

 

My daughter worked at Disneyland in jobs where she interacted with people. Customer care and service is a high priority and castmembers are trained for it. They need to be. Guests spit, hit and scream at castmembers. Why? A ride they want to take their kids on is closed for renovation is a popular reason, but there are other even more trivial ones.

 

Working with the public these days is no easy job. While there are many of us who actively try to make sure we treat others with friendliness and respect there are, unfortunately, many who do not. When I am onboard, I do my best to show the hard working people who live on the ship that we do appreciate them.

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No one knows if this person and alzheimers or senile dimentia so why is that being used as an excuse.

 

I am a nurse and work in homecare and take care of these type of patients on a regular basis. A person with either of these problems should never be left alone on a cruise ship. They can injure themselves in all so many ways.

 

In our opinion there is no reason or excuse for bad manners. period....

 

Ruth & Jim

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My ex-mother-in-law was born around 1911. She was always telling me that I was "low class" for saying "thank you" to waiters and waitresses. Apparently a lot of people from that era were raised that way... servants were put there to serve you... it is their job... and you treat them accordingly. :-(

 

Sheila

 

I sounds like we had the same MIL! It never stopped me from saying thank you but it sure lowered my opinion of HER!

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As far as the aforementioned woman and her milk request - I am not ashamed to admit - I would have spontaneously leaned over and said to whomever I was with - and just lound enough for the milk woman to hear........: " what a b&!*h!". I have way too little tolerance for such imbecilic, classless behavior in public. Save it for your husband.

 

Then I would have resumed whatever conversation I was having.

 

I make no apologies for my innocuous intollerences - even if ever so slighly imbecillic and classless.

 

Although my behavior would have been inexcusable to some ears. I would have, however, surely blurted it out.

 

Bad behavior, IMNSHO, should never go unpunished. Since the woman was clearly elderly, my motto of "kill them before they multiply" would be deemed inappropiate.

 

 

I will be on the Southeast Asia Cruise leaving Singapore on April 4, 2009. No warning intended - just a note.

 

By the way - this was posted tongue in cheek------sorta.

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A person with either of these problems should never be left alone on a cruise ship.

 

Sometimes (as I'm sure you know) other things must occur before a person is diagnosed. If the "milk woman" is in the early stages, her family may not have even be aware at that time that she was developing some form of dementia. Personality changes as one ages can often be excused by family members who may not be aware themselves that these changes may signal the onset of dementia or Alzheimers'.

 

Personally I prefer to cut older people who behave this way as much of a break as I can. You never know what they may be dealing with.

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Several months ago, a woman with alzheimers was traveling by herself and had to change planes in DFW. She went missing and for several days the news here kept asking people to be on the look out for her. Her remains were found a few days ago several miles from the airport. I can't imagine what horror that poor woman must have gone through as she wandered aimlessly trying to find her way.

 

I don't know why she was traveling alone but it's a very sad story and reinforces the fact that people with this disease need to be supervised.

 

Diane

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