Unwelcome At Our Assigned Table

[amapola]

Any comments? Yup, just one. The definition of long should be up to the person cruising.

I happen to think a 10 day cruise is long. My prerogative.

 

Happy New Year everyone!

 

Yup, ITA. :) For me, the definition of a 30 day cruise would be "torture" :eek: :rolleyes:

[Napi's Mom]

What I would like to know is how can you criticize this woman about her size? While I agree her behavior was rude and unacceptable, her size has nothing to do with her mentality. She could be thin and beautiful and but that wouldn't make her behavior acceptable. It is very disconcerting when someone who is critical of another person brings their size/weight into it. While I am a large woman, I believe I have dignity and respect for others and simply wish that people would not include their prejudices toward overweight people in their critiques. It is not funny. It is very hurtful and unnecessary.:(

As I can guess the other posters who found this funny were not persons "OF Size" I am way beyond "fluffy" as someone once described herself. But the only "Boost into buses" are from my poor "HERO" DH. No not everyone who is of a certain size eats whole Toyota's, I eat less than my fairly lean DH,(yes truly) but having difficulty getting around makes for less exercise, which doesn't help, plus your genetic makeup has MUCH to do with your weight (read up online, new studies prove this...no not glands etc., but your genes!) haven't you ever met anyone who eats like an elephant and is skinny as a rail??? In any case the woman would have been rude skinny, as you've said, her weight just made her the butt of insults (we get thicker skins, from folks who think they're superior, smarter etc. because they're thin, actually in my opinion the inverse is true) Thanks for also sticking up for "OUR" side:rolleyes:

[FinelyCruising]

The majority of the issues concerning the discomfort had to do with her size. It was germane to the story.

 

And to add a story and shift gears and one that has nothing to to with size....we were on an excursion with a private guide that I had located and made arrangements with. On our roll call I shared this information with others in the event they wanted to join in on my find.

 

Well when the day came, one person who was among those who joined in did nothing but complain LOUD and LONG about how she was not in the other van with the other driver. The whining was a non stop annoyance for all of us, and no amount of suggestion that this tour was still all part of the same tour even made a dent to get her to shut up.

 

The fact was I was supposed to be with the other driver but things went sideways when we boarded the two minivans and it wasn't worth bothering over as far as I was concerned, but truth be told there is no doubt that I was about ready to choke this PITA, and since I was sitting behind her in the van, I was thinking Godfather style. :D

[scapel]

Any comments? Yup, just one. The definition of long should be up to the person cruising.

I happen to think a 10 day cruise is long. My prerogative.

 

Happy New Year everyone!

Long and Short are all relative. Long is longer than short and short is shorter than long.

Jumbo shirmp--Well we have a count system for that, but some perfer their own system of size judgement.

I think a 10 day cruise is longer than a 7 day cruise, but it is shorter than a 14 day cruise.

What is the point of this. Nothing Just jabberring.

[BurgerBits]

The fact was I was supposed to be with the other driver but things went sideways when we boarded the two minivans and it wasn't worth bothering over as far as I was concerned, but truth be told there is no doubt that I was about ready to choke this PITA, and since I was sitting behind her in the van, I was thinking Godfather style. :D

 

Had the exact same urge on an excursion in Italy. My parents were aboard the bus as well (just the 3 of us that trip).

 

All said and done, I was grateful for my parents' presence. No telling what might have transpired otherwise. (I believe there was a group fashioning either a sling or garrote in the back, but as I only caught glimpses of the project, I was never sure... and the unhappy woman left the tour before lunch. Perhaps a bit of ESP?)

[bbro]

This happened to DH and I on our very first cruise and we were mortified! We did sit with this family the first night and then were found a new table for the remainder of the cruise. That was the LONGEST dinner of my life - the matriarch staring me down the entire meal and the rest of the family huddling and whispering so we couldn't hear. We felt like the 2 new kids on their first day of school. We were so inexperience we didn't realize we should have asked to be moved immediately. We ended up at a great table for the rest of the cruise so our trip was by no means ruined. Some people just have no manners. As my husband always says "Bless them on their way".

[Susan-M]

Long and Short are all relative.

Agree...and if a poster said they went on a short, medium or long cruise without specifying the number of days, not many of us would know what they meant, so I think warmwinds' original description of "long, 14 night cruise" was quite appropriate.:)

[FinelyCruising]

Had the exact same urge on an excursion in Italy. My parents were aboard the bus as well (just the 3 of us that trip).

 

All said and done, I was grateful for my parents' presence. No telling what might have transpired otherwise. (I believe there was a group fashioning either a sling or garrote in the back, but as I only caught glimpses of the project, I was never sure... and the unhappy woman left the tour before lunch. Perhaps a bit of ESP?)

 

Its not hard to understand how people snap!:o

[ScubesDad]

An earlier post said "you can't fix stupid"; regretably, this is plain old bad manners, and I am amazed at the number of people who are offerring up excuses for the totally inappropriate behavour. Yes, the original "lady" may have been surprised that "strangers" had arrived at "her" table, maybe she should have counted to 10 before opening her mouth. The OP dealt with the situation in a very tactful manner.

[Bibi]

Cupcakequeen named Bibi,

Nice combination. Oh Well, I was afraid it was some of the French Canadians that kicked us Cajuns from Louisiana out many years ago. :) I was calling Quebec east but I guess Novo Scotia and Newfoundland are the east.

I was trying to distinguish from BC and Alberta.

A beautiful cruise coming down the St.Lawrence to Quebec City.

 

Hi Joe,

Those darn Quebecers eh? That was comical, thanks for the chuckle. BTW, Cupcake queen is my sister. She didnt realize I was signed in. Happy New year to you and yours.....and Happy Cruising! Bibi

[Bibi]

I am overweight myself; trust me, I know from where I speak. I have often thought that a Toyota Yaris sandwich would be yummy. But the woman was complaining for all to hear about the wheelchair's wheels wearing on her thighs...there is only one reason why this could happen; she is way too fat, and there's really only one way one gets like that. And at every bus stop she insisted that those behind her more or less grab her ample rear (or whatever) and push her on to the bus while insisting that those already on the bus pull her on. All the while she is huffing and puffing to be sure that all on the bus know how difficult it was for her. Yet, when she got off the bus, she had no problem getting around to wherever she wanted to go, sans wheelchair. She was a very large royal pain in the ass to all and sundry. Sorry you were offended (not the intention) but believe me, all who were forced to have to listen to her or deal with her were far more offended than you will ever be. My story is just my way of making lemonade out of lemons. Otherwise, my excursion would have been totally awful, and I paid for it. Do I need that ignorant woman? I don't think so. I felt that those who read the account would see that. Sorry that you didn't.

 

Spearmint, Thank you for that clarification. I guess I didnt read it the way you meant or just misunderstood. I appreciate you taking the time to clear it up for me:o and I definitely understand now. My apologies for the hasty response. Happy cruising!

[spearmint]

Spearmint, Thank you for that clarification. I guess I didnt read it the way you meant or just misunderstood. I appreciate you taking the time to clear it up for me:o and I definitely understand now. My apologies for the hasty response. Happy cruising!

 

No problem. In fact, it was your response that made me realize that there was another way to take it. I honestly never even considered that point of view while I was writing. Boorish behaviour comes in all sizes to be sure as well as all genders. :)

[DoctorDestiny]

Boy it's good that didn't happen to me as I might have gone off on that witch. Totally classless. We love sitting with strangers and some have gone on to become friends. That's one of the joys of cruising.

[GottaLuvCruising]

We had an experience a few years ago that is almost opposite of this one. We were a large group of very experienced crusiers. There were 14 of us 10 adults and four younger ones. When we checked in they had us spread out all over the room. Well that would not do for the wives in our group, they met with the MD and explained that this would not do and that they expected him to fix it. At dinner time we went to the Dining Room and the wives walked right up to him and asked how he had "fixed" the table situation. He showed us to a "large" table for 16 (yes they moved several large tables together. We found that there was also a lady and her young son had been moved in with us. The waiter arrived and immediatly told everyone to stand up. He seated all the kids on one end of the table and then told the adults to seat ourselves. I was a little taken aback, till I found that this was the best for the kids. All orders were taken and the kids were served first, then the adults. As we were celebrating an anneversiry that night I ordered enough wine to serve all the adults, including the extra lady and offered her a glass, which she accepted. I also ordered two bottles of sparking grape juice ( the waiter served it to the kids in champane glasses. When the MD appeared near the end of the meal to tell the extra lady that he had arranged another table for her and her son, she announced to him that they would remain with us, if it was ok with us. Of course we were pleased to have her and her son. It made for a great week to have made new friends. You get out of it what you put in.

 

Caughrons

 

Nice story! It seems that everyone played a role in handling it well. Thanks for sharing!

[AirGorilla]

I have enjoyed reading this rather straight to the point resume because we came off a November cruise and I was forced to share half my aircraft seat to London from Barcelona..a two hour leg fortunately...with one half of a duo of two ladies from our cruise travelling on to Chicago...both of whom were extremely overweight already and indulged themselves even more every night (after having early seating dinner at a nearby table to our own ) with late night pasta, pizza, nibbles in the buffet while we enjoyed out pre -bed cup of tea! Every one to their own as long as it does not affect others who have no interest in what they are doing unless it impacts them personally is my personal view.

 

However it became a dilemma for me as having already been in an emergency landing in an aircraft in trouble years ago, the terror instilled in me after that event still lives with me every time I fly.

These two ladies had to have seats apart on the aircraft, needed extra belts like those issued to mothers with babies on their lap( they went to get those immediately they arrived at their allocated seats so they knew the score) and my immediate neighbour (across the aisle from the other ) overflowed onto my seat so I spent a lot of time contemplating during the 2 hour flight how to get out of my seat in any emergency that might occur...and not be rude and inconsiderate in pushing past or over her to save my life if need be.

 

It is no laughing matter really ....this is very sensitive to everyone having to deal with the problem from both standpoints.....and I do not wish to start a controversy ....but these people never seem to consider how their own personal life style impact others who have absolutely every right to proceed with their own lives without having to worry about the pros and cons of seeming rude, inconsiderate or even plain selfish .

If you want to make a further comment please.. I refer you back to my flight emergency and suggest you try imagining what would happen if someone in the aisle could not move swiftly enough to allow anyone nearby to be evacuated and how this would be dealt with by those stuck behind.

 

The airline should have required that your seatmate purchase two seats!! Seriously!!

 

AG

[CathyCruises]

This story reminds me of a time I went to visit a girlfriend in Texas with a mutual friend, male, who happens to be quite overweight (about 350 lbs).

 

As we were leaving DFW, we were seated in the back row of the plane. Richard was in the window seat, I was squeezed into the middle seat (and I am 5'8" and somewhat overweight myself) and the aisle seat had a nice young man with his year-old child in his lap, who squirmed and squiggled like young kids will do. As if that wasn't bad enough, we sat on the runway for 2 HOURS waiting for the thunderstorms to pass. THAT was torture--I have rarely been so miserable in all my days. It makes my skin crawl just to think about it--and it was back in 2002!

 

Sometimes things work out great, like our flight back from Europe when we had a whole row for the two of us, and boy, sometimes they don't! It DID make a memory, that's for sure.

 

Cathy

[Sky Sweet]

The airline should have required that your seatmate purchase two seats!! Seriously!!

 

AG

 

Hi Airgorilla :)

 

Based on an experience I had a few years ago, I agree with you.

 

The person sitting next to me on a long flight could not fit into her seat so she lifted the armrest between us and used part of my seat, as well as hers. Consequently, I was forced to squeeze myself into a corner of the seat I had paid for because I did not want her body to touch mine.

 

I had considered complaining about this situation to a flight attendant, but didn't know how to do it without insulting the person who was so large that she needed part of my seat as well as her own.

[FinelyCruising]

I take the aisle seat every time I can. And just to show that size has nothing to do with tight squeezes, last flight I had a teen next to me and she was a skinny little thing that wanted to curl up and sleep. All I could do was lean into the aisle so I had 'my space'.

 

Armrests, unless you take it over before someone else does, will be your loss. :D

[luvtocook]

Hi Airgorilla :)

 

Based on an experience I had a few years ago, I agree with you.

 

The person sitting next to me on a long flight could not fit into her seat so she lifted the armrest between us and used part of my seat, as well as hers. Consequently, I was forced to squeeze myself into a corner of the seat I had paid for because I did not want her body to touch mine.

 

I had considered complaining about this situation to a flight attendant, but didn't know how to do it without insulting the person who was so large that she needed part of my seat as well as her own.

 

You know--I really "feel" for people who are overweight and cannot help it for whatever reasons. However, when that problem such as you describe, invades my personal space and comfort on a flight which I have paid the same $$$ for, I will get up & talk to a flight attendant. It is unacceptable for me to be displaced because of an issue like this. They can purchase 2 seats if necessary, I want to enjoy all of "my" seat by myself.

Finely--I agree-I always get an aisle just "in case"!!!! We are fortunate that where we live, and we fly AA, usually the MD80's, we get the 2 side seats instead of the 3 sides!

[wvufan]

I feel bad for the OP.

 

Regardless of the circumstances, the "lady" at the table behaved inexcusably. There were alll sorts of better ways to have handled the situation.

 

It seems that by her tone and actions, she felt like she was some sort of queen bee and other folks on the ship (such as the OP) were siimply "extras."

 

I admire all of you who would have handled it with the grace of the OP, and I am sure we would have found a table where we felt comfortable, but I probably would have had to have said something so that the rest of the cruise she wouldn't feel like our superior and to let her know how inappropriate she was.

 

Maybe something like :

 

"How Rude! Lady, if you didn't want to dine with strangers, why are you sitting at OUR table?:D

 

Or, how about: "What a coincidence-we specified polite folks-luckily we found out before we sat down!" :DAnd then had the maitre d' escort us away.

 

If the woman at the table had not intended to come off like that, she should take the initiative to apologize and clear the air.

 

Anyway, we have always specified large tables and it has worked out wonderfully. We have made close life long friends and look forward to meeting many new "strangers" in the future.

 

While I'm on a roll, I figure I paid for the airline seat and I'm not gonna share it involuntarily. I sympathize with the plight of larger folks who can't comforably fit in the seats, but I also remember many times when some big galoot stood or sat in front of me (I'm 5'5") at a sporting or other event and didn't seem too concerned with obscuring my view;).

 

Wow, this is like the old days!

 

Happy Sails to You

 

OOOEEE :D:D Bob and Phyl

[FinelyCruising]

It's been a good topic. I did not really ever take the time to think too much about how important dining room seating is to the majority of cruisers. I thought the main concern was early or late, but this has been enlightening and it shows the importance of individualism and who people are with, want to be with, or who they are not with that makes a huge difference to their enjoyment. Mostly there are choices, and we need to rely on the staff to assist us as best as they can.