What are parents thinking?

[Maria65]

Don't get me wrong, my kids have lots of rules and expectations. That comes along with the added responsibility.

 

And my son wore his suit, even though he doesn't like to, because he knows it's a small price to pay for what he's been given.

 

I don't think this has been addressed, but those without kids may be surprised to learn that once a child is in the 12 and up areas of the kids club, the policy is that they come and go as they please. Even if you wanted to sign them in and out you can't.

[LoriLinay]

Oh great, now the "stay at home and raise your kids" card has been thrown into the mix.

 

Hang on while I go get some popcorn and a de-caf....this is gonna be good...

[nosnobunny]

Forget the coffee - I want a Bloody Mary. :D

 

Beth

[LoriLinay]

Well, I didn't want anyone to comment on my early morning alcohol consumption. But I really WOULD prefer a dry vodka martini for this one....

[NancyB84]

Oh great, now the "stay at home and raise your kids" card has been thrown into the mix.

 

Hang on while I go get some popcorn and a de-caf....this is gonna be good...

 

I hear you!!!! Grabbing the popcorn.

 

It's too bad this thread went in this direction because when it was first posted I sincerely got the impression that it was meant to warn people (maybe new cruisers) about potential dangers that they may not have thought about. I don't think it was meant to encourage "paranoia" but to simply remind people that a ship is still a part of society and that safety rules from home should still apply.

[NancyB84]

Well, I didn't want anyone to comment on my early morning alcohol consumption. But I really WOULD prefer a dry vodka martini for this one....

So, I guess I shouldn't tell you that I traded in my coffee for a beer???? Popcorn and coffe do not go well together.

[Elizanessie]

I am on to the chocolate..need to keep my fingers kinda busy and sticky so as not to type much...I am being a good girl today and not responding to any "heavy"postings....hey it is Friday :D

 

Liz

[LoriLinay]

I'm headed up to the bar....let's see.... Maine wants a beer, Canada wants a bloody mary...minnesota needs a martini...anyone else while I'm up?

 

Someone else will have to get the snacks, my hands are full..

[PTarbay]

Well, I didn't want anyone to comment on my early morning alcohol consumption. But I really WOULD prefer a dry vodka martini for this one....

Could you make me one too?Shaken not stirred

[NancyB84]

I'm headed up to the bar....let's see.... Maine wants a beer, Canada wants a bloody mary...minnesota needs a martini...anyone else while I'm up?

 

Someone else will have to get the snacks, my hands are full..

I'll share my popcorn

[LoriLinay]

Liz, maybe you and I can hold hands and jump into the "single parents are bad parents who ignore their kids" thread together!! LOLOLOL!!!

 

Sorry, I missed your drink order...

[RedSoxWon]

I find it funny how some people have viewed this as a socio-economic issue. How it's the day care kids who somehow have been mentally damaged because of the economic necessity of two paychecks. I guess only families who can afford to have a parent stay at home should be having kids. Yes, my kid is in day care. My initial reaction (equally invalid) upon reading the initial post was that these are overindulged rich kids who have never learned the value of the dollar or of discipline. That's my particular lens on the world. Let's face it, it takes a little bit of $$ to tote the whole family off to a cruise. My wife and saved saved for years to be able to do it. Fact is, this is not a socio-economic issue. It's a parenting issue, plain and simple.

[Elizanessie]

Lori

 

I will get the snacks...could I have a Vodka with coke and lots of ice...and in a tall glass if you can fit that onto the tray.....it is rather cold here and maybe a little Vody for the body is called for.

 

Crisps (sorry chips),popcorn,peanuts,chocolate anything else?

 

Liz

[shipknotshore]

I would like to think that MOST parents would know their child(ren) well enough to know how they would act on vacation. An unruly child at home would most likely mean the same on vacation. Personally, I don't have a whole lot of respect for parents who let their children make their own rules. Some of the parents act like they can't be bothered and let their kids call the shots.

The story that Stretch told really bothered me. Try to convince me that this is the first time this girl has displayed that kind of behavior - highly unlikely. Maybe not to that degree - but the father sure has his head up his you know what to think that those two well meaning gentlemen that escorted the daughter back to her room had done what they were accused of. Come on - if they had - do you think they would have brought her back to her stateroom?? Now try to convince me that the father is really actively involved in the parenting of his daughter ... I have to say it's highly unlikely. Although you can't blame the parents in every case, sometimes it's just so obvious.

[Elizanessie]

Lori

 

Please dont get me started on that one....I am sure Beth will remember me getting in a mess about similiar subject earlier in the year.

 

I am only here for the beer !! Ok for the Vodka....would this be a good time for me to have my first martini? :D

 

Liz

[Cary T]

Boy, this thread runs the gamut! Like the lives of our children, they want to be good but they don't want to miss out on any of the good stuff. I think our biggest fear is that they are going to do the stuff that we did! We have two girls at home-different as night and day,always have been-and the only constant that we can provide is a set of rules that we expect them to obey and enough trust to let them try out the lessons we've tried to teach them. It's like when they start driving, you don't say "congratulations, can you drive to the other coast and pick up a gallon of milk?" instead you send them to the corner and wait nervously for their return and little by little you let them go.

[NancyB84]

The story that Stretch told really bothered me. .

 

I second that. I told my DH about it last night and he reminded me about our trip on Carnival Triumph and the little girl we found wandering around on deck 7. We called the Pursers desk and waited in the hall with her until a staff member came. We then walked the halls with her and the staff looking for her room (while they waited for someone to look the info up based on her name tag from the childrens program). She was only about 5 and didn't speak English. When the family was finally located, they hauled her into the room, glared at us (like we had done something wrong) and slammed the door in our faces.

 

One of the things I liked about the idea of the original topic was to remind parents of small children that the ship is not necessarily any safer than the mall. One of the things we found on our last cruise was that to our boys (ages 8 and 10), all the rooms along those halls look alike and remembering a 4 digit room number was tougher than they thought. (even though we spent weeks telling them)!!!

[Maria65]

For every story like that one about the drunk girl and the two men, there are how many stories of kids who come back to their cabin each night safe and sober? Well, of course we don't know because it's so common it's not newsworthy. No one regales fellow cruisers of the tale of well-behaved teens because it's not very exciting. The majority of kids handle their freedom wisely, and the majority of parents must be doing something right. Yes, there are definitely some exceptions out there but please don't paint every teen and every parent with the same broad brush.

 

 

 

eta: a five-year old wandering alone is ridiculous, that's not the age group I'm discussing. I wouldn't let my seven-year old wander the neighborhood on her own and I certainly wouldn't let her on a cruise ship.

[WaterWish]

Can I get a Cosmopolitan and some roasted almonds?

 

Thanks. ;)

 

LoriLinay, You're a mom with a good head on your shoulders! I also echo the (various posters) thoughts that kids need to be given the opportunity to fail. I am over-involved (read: wait on hand and foot) with my 6-year-old because she's an only child, and I have to remember to let (encourage/make) her do some things for herself. This past summer was a big turning point in our neighborhood because a number of kids sort of "came of age" to the point where they could be riding their bikes up and down the street and to each other's houses. It was a big step for all the parents, but at the same time we felt comfortable because we have a close-knit, safe neighborhood with lots of parents watching. Of course, on a cruise she's going to remain in my eyesight at all times except if she's in Adventure Ocean, but I could see responsible middle-schoolers being given some independence -- IT ALL DEPENDS ON THE KID and what he/she KNOWS IS EXPECTED. That's what it boils down to -- the trouble starts with kids whose parents either a) don't have any standards/expectations OR b), I venture to say, kids whose parents normally are OVERLY STRICT, and who don't TRUST THEIR KIDS to have good judgment on dry land, and then let them "go" on the ship. So the kids don't have the appropriate SOCIAL SKILLS or even KNOW how to be responsible or handle their own freedom and they go NUTS.

 

Let the fur fly on that one. But I think that last point has some merit.

[NancyB84]

Lori

 

Please dont get me started on that one....I am sure Beth will remember me getting in a mess about similiar subject earlier in the year.

 

I am only here for the beer !! Ok for the Vodka....would this be a good time for me to have my first martini? :D

 

Liz

 

Liz, might I suggest a flavored martini... say... caramel apple? :D

[LoriLinay]

Water, thank you so much for the very nice compliment.

 

Next drink is on me, what would you like?

[stbmom]

This post was not started to talk about people letting their 18 year old ADULT children walk alone on a cruise. It was about the people that allow their 15 and 16 year old girls to have their butts grabbed by grown men at midnight (which I have seen with my own eyes), the parents that need a crew member to kick their kids out of an "adults only" function, and the parents that let their 12 year old and under kids walk around a ship alone. This is not your neighborhood - this is a ship with lots of different types of people.

Also, anyone comparing Elvis music to the lyrics of today is sadly mistaken. Let me start by saying I am 29, not 54. I don't think Elvis talked about molesting a woman with a flashlight (lyrics from one popular song), punching a woman in the stomach until she had a miscarriage if she wouldn't have an abortion (that was one of Usher's songs - #1 on the charts for quite some time), or christina's song "dirty". Elvis shaking is hips was crazy for your time - I'll admit, but don't you think comparing that to music today is a bit of a leap?

Have you parents who let your kids wear whatever they want to ever been to their school? Ever served as chaperon at a school dance? Not that your children shouldn't go - they should. But with that said, when they take that same behavior the perform around other 14 and 15 year old kids, and perform it on a ship with drunk adults - they will get the opportunity to grow up REAL FAST. You think you have taught you kid to say no, but many adults report being presured to buy jewlrey from vendors in some locations. Guess what those pushy vendors are trying to sell your teenager.

I'm not saying put a leash on them, just be aware. Especially those 12 and 13 year olds.

But I know, your kid would never do that. Your kid will never encounter a bad person. Your kid at 12 has developed the social skills they will need for a college campus (even though most kids don't have those skills until 17 or 18).

I love to see parents like you on TV when something happens. Like the Columbine parents that had no idea their kids were making bombs in the basement. Or the parents of the 3 13 year olds in Georgia that just baked a cake with blech, past, and other chemicals that put 12 classmates in the hospital. Their parents had "great, wonderful, suburban kids too", until last week that is.

See, my job has had me in the living room of a lot of parents like you. When their young teenager has been molested by an older man. They always taught their kids the right thing. They just didn't monitor the on line activity, or they let them roam the streets at night to give them "freedom" they would need to develop the skills to go to college in 5 years. Or maybe you are like the parent of the 15 year old that took pornographic pictures of herself and put them on the internet. See, her mom let her make her own decisions on what to wear too. Even if that mean showing her butt crack and having "boy toy" written across her cheast. And her lovely 15 year old got the idea for the pictures from the wonderful family friend - a 30 year old man who just happened to like spending time with teenage girls.

But this would never happen to your child. Your child will only met nice, lovely people where ever they go. Your child will never be around a person that knows exactly how to take advantage of a 12 or 13 year old. Your child is mature enough to travel around foreign countries all alone (do you know the rape statistics of the ports of call? You wouldn't let them roam around a local inner city with less murder rates than some of these ports would you?). But that's okay, because your child is different. Your child is perfect and your child lives in a perfect world with perfect people. Keep this post for when I sit in your living room.

[shipknotshore]

Waterwish: I agree. I knew my son had his head screwed on right when HE decided to change friends when he was in the 8th grade. These friends were boys that had hung out at our house for years. Well, when these kids got into Junior High they didn't hang out at the house as much (no girls at my house) and their interests changed. My son came home from school one day and told me that he wasn't hanging out with them anymore - he never really told me why. I was really bothered by it - and my son assured me not to worry - "there are alot of other kids to be friends with". I ran into a couple of the boys sometime later and noticed that they were both smoking. I really applaud my son - he decided on his own that rather than hang with a crowd that had turned in different direction than he wanted to go - he would just hang with ones that were going the same way he was. You can't imagine the pride I felt at his ability to make this wise decision at an age when it's so hard to fit in. I still smile when I think about it and he's 23 years old now.

[WaterWish]

So, sbtmom, what's your point?

[LoriLinay]

STB---My boss just walked by and wondered why I'm standing on my desk giving "someone" a standing ovation!!!

 

Excellent words.