Teenage boys / dinning room footwear

[BND]

How we approached it with our now grown sons was that in certain situations you have to suck it up and dress up. No option. For school, around the house, etc, I dont really care as long as it's clean and not lewd, which was never a problem with them anyway. It won't hurt to tell your child he has to wear a jacket, tie and dress shoes for dinner only. The rest of the time let him wear what he wants (within reason of course). It's all about growing up and functioning in the real world. Believe me, his future boss and/or spouse won't be so nice about it. The reality is you can have nice kids who dress nice too. It's not either or. You do have to pick your battles, but this is a small portion of their vacation time, an hour or so a day.

[ShowSkiMom]

Seems to me someone that prided themselves on "thinking outside the box" wouldn't be so quick to judge others for their opinions ;)

 

You know what...you're absolutly right. That did sound judgemental and I have to apologize for that. It's just that I have a real problem with people judging others based on their looks or how they dress. Especially teenagers who are trying to find their sense of self...just like we all did at their age. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if they choose to laugh at how someone dresses or look down on them, than that is their right. For me personally, life is way too short to worry about such mundane things. Some of the best people I know are fashion disasters. If my parenting skills are judged based solely on my son's fashion sense...then so be it but how sad.

[GoinCruisin]

I personally, would never judge someone by what they wear... as I hope they would not do that to me. If someone chooses to wear something that I personally don't deem appropriate for a situation, I don't make rash judgements... I have opinions on situations, but would never judge on appearance. We can all have varying opinions but it doesn't mean that just because any of us feel it's not appropriate, that we are narrow minded. I would wager that anyone that knows me here on these boards, will tell you that I am the FURTHEST thing from narrow minded, stuffy or pompous, LOL!!!!! :eek:

[ShowSkiMom]

I would wager that anyone that knows me here on these boards, will tell you that I am the FURTHEST thing from narrow minded, stuffy or pompous, LOL!!!!! :eek:

 

Just so you know, my comments were not directed at you and were not based entirely on the posts in this particular thread. Rather, they were based on the way certain posters respond to any thread having to do with this or similar subjects. So, please don't feel that I have somehow personally attacked you. I only get my dander up after someone has personally attacked me ;)

[GoinCruisin]

No problem at all! I just wanted to clarify how I felt... I didn't feel like you attacked me, no worries!!!! Happy Criusing!!!!

[Bethwte]

My two cents:

 

To the OP: I really doubt anyone would notice the footwear. Pants with cover most of it anyways, and the tie will probably keep attention on the upper part of his body. Hey, if people wear shorts (which are banned in writing from the dining room at all times), he can wear sneaks that, while some may frown upon, aren't even "against the rules"

 

To the little side debate going on: I've seen men come to formal night dinners dressed in drag (sometimes it may be their lifestyle, as they look nice w/ make-up wigs etc and sometimes you can tell its just guys having fun by putting on a womans gown). In my opinion, if you can wear a woman's gown to dinner, by all means you can wear a duct-tape tie! I don't think I'd wear it (I dont think I have thick enough skin to endure that), but if he wants to, let him. He's most certainly not breaking any rules. He will be "formal" (I suppose), and not in forbidden attire like shorts or a bathing suit. :)

[jcrandle]

My two cents:

 

To the OP: I really doubt anyone would notice the footwear. Pants with cover most of it anyways, and the tie will probably keep attention on the upper part of his body. Hey, if people wear shorts (which are banned in writing from the dining room at all times), he can wear sneaks that, while some may frown upon, aren't even "against the rules"

 

To the little side debate going on: I've seen men come to formal night dinners dressed in drag (sometimes it may be their lifestyle, as they look nice w/ make-up wigs etc and sometimes you can tell its just guys having fun by putting on a womans gown). In my opinion, if you can wear a woman's gown to dinner, by all means you can wear a duct-tape tie! I don't think I'd wear it (I dont think I have thick enough skin to endure that), but if he wants to, let him. He's most certainly not breaking any rules. He will be "formal" (I suppose), and not in forbidden attire like shorts or a bathing suit. :)

Uh, shorts are not banned in the dining room at all times. From Carnival's website, "NOTE: Shorts, t-shirts and bathing attire are not permitted in the Dining Room during dinner."

[Bethwte]

True, I misspoke... I meant at all dinner times (be it casual or formal)! Oops! Sorry about that...

[BND]

I'm getting tired of those who ask a question and then get offended when they don't get the answer they wanted. Why ask if you don't want to hear other opinions? What exactly is wrong with asking your children to conform with the request to dress up some for the evenings? I know there are some people who spend their lives going against the flow, and thinking outside the box is great if you work in an environment that needs creativity, but eating at a formal dinner is not one of those places. We all do things in our lives that require certain requirements be met. I do see a lot of parents excusing their child's behavior or dress because they're afraid to parent, but this is really simple, 1 hour per day out of 24 on the cruise to dress up is not too much to ask. Everyone has just as much right to be offended by your child's dress as you do to not be. Having raised two wonderful young men who are now in college, I do speak from some recent experience.

[Girlsnightout]

LOL< I have seen many a Chuck Taylor held together by the mighty duct tape!!! LOL!!!!

 

Who or what is Chuck Taylor?:confused:

[GoinCruisin]

Who or what is Chuck Taylor?:confused:

 

Converse High Tops/All Stars = Chuck Taylors... You can call them Converse High Tops, Chucks, Chuck Taylors, etc... all the same thing. Chuck Taylor was the basketball player responsible for promoting, and contributing to the popularity of the shoes about 90 years ago, so they slapped the patch on the shoes, and they have been called "Chucks" ever since :D

[blwms]

Nothing wrong with his choice. Believe it or not..it's till hwat's inside that counts! If your family was cruising with us in Septemeber, we would love to have you join our table!( By the way, I have no problem with those choosing to wear tux, etc. Other people look nice in them...but for me the jacket and tie will always be my choice. I am a retired banker and the "have to" dress code is a thing of the past for me. Enjoy each other, ejoy life! It's all too short to be concerned with the

trivial things in life. We have a 35 year old son with some mental disabilities. He cruises with us, loves to "dress up", but if he did not I sure would not insist. I'm just proud he is a fine morally fit, loving, see no bad in anyone individual. Enjoy your children!!!!Forget the "socially correct" crowd. Let them enjoy a cruise their way and you enjoy it yours!

[hlfdzn]

Not only are they all the rage..Chuck Taylors have become expensive!!! They used to be the "cheap" gym shoes....now they are a fashion statement.

 

I stand by my "pick your battles" attitude, and I agree that there should be some boundries. If the kid is willing to wear a tie, even a duct tape one, I am assuming he is going to wear a dress shirt and dress pants as well.

 

My 16 yr old had a mowhawk hairdo last yr. Now, this is not the one who gets in trouble..quite the contrary. This boy would lay down on the train tracks and die for anyone he cares about, and he is loved by everyone who knows him. I gave him his clothes each night (they were color matched with everyone) and asked that he wear his hair down, instead of up like the rooster does. He happily agreed and we had a wonderful time. Yes he has a mowhawk in my formal picture, even though it is not spiked up, you can tell what it is. Sorry to say for him, he did not keep his grades as high as I stipulated to keep the hair that way and he had to cut it off shortly after the cruise. Again he complied with no argument.

 

I agree with looking neat and clean and with setting boundries, but I also stand behind picking your battles.

 

 

I was trying to think of worse things than gym shoes and a duct tape tie and most of you will agree...the child who brings the NORWALK with him to dinner!!!!!!!

 

I am so glad to see this thread stayed civil. Thanks everyone for agreeing that we can disagree and stay friends.

[hstrybuf]

I once knew a guy who wore black high tops with a tux! :eek: I wouldn't worry too much about the shoes, but the duct tape tie . . . maybe he should just forget the tie.

[Nliedel]

people actually eating at McDonalds I have a problem with. :D (joking)

 

Bill

 

Did you see "Supersize Me"? I can't eat there anymore.

[Nliedel]

When I was a teenager I wore my hair in a "punk"style and if I am remembering correctly it was shaved on one side. My parents never took family pictures (well my Dad cause my Mom was gone). I grew out of it, settled down and had kids and am a "fairly" respectable member of sociaty. I dress in a modest style. My kids don't even believe me!!

 

My point is this. I am not the OP's sons parent. If I was I would be proud of his creativity and sense of humor. I would take plenty of pictures and just enjoy every moment with him. I know I have posted this before.. I am the mother of five boys, one of whom is gone. I wish he was here to wear a duct tape tie. That does not mean I give my kids carte blanche to do as they will.. It does mean that as long as they are clean, well spoken, and decently behaved (not to the point of "seen and not heard" but if I catch you even tossing so much as a scrap of paper overboard you might follow it) then they can dress as they will within the bounds of reason. They pick out their own clothes and I support them.

 

Just a thought.

[alylee777]

What is a Norwalk? Is that a Walkman? If we are doing a very LOOOONNNGGG dinner sometimes I let my son bring his gameboy with him. He must turn off the volume and he must eat dinner and socialize first. He only may use it at the point in the evening when the BORING adult chatter just goes on and on over coffee and desert.

OP, still think the tie sounds formal enough. It is grey duct tape correct?

A:D

[GoinCruisin]

What is a Norwalk? Is that a Walkman? If we are doing a very LOOOONNNGGG dinner sometimes I let my son bring his gameboy with him. He must turn off the volume and he must eat dinner and socialize first. He only may use it at the point in the evening when the BORING adult chatter just goes on and on over coffee and desert.

 

OP, still think the tie sounds formal enough. It is grey duct tape correct?

 

A:D

 

LOL! Norwalk is a virus... :D

 

And I'll take the duct tape tie and high tops over a child bringing a gameboy to the dinner table. To each his own, but it's not very courteous of fellow tablemates... just my opinion.

 

Happy cruising!!!

[pelletib]

You may have a future cruise director in the making !!

[rc51]

I'm getting tired of those who ask a question and then get offended when they don't get the answer they wanted. Why ask if you don't want to hear other opinions? What exactly is wrong with asking your children to conform with the request to dress up some for the evenings? I know there are some people who spend their lives going against the flow, and thinking outside the box is great if you work in an environment that needs creativity, but eating at a formal dinner is not one of those places. We all do things in our lives that require certain requirements be met. I do see a lot of parents excusing their child's behavior or dress because they're afraid to parent, but this is really simple, 1 hour per day out of 24 on the cruise to dress up is not too much to ask. Everyone has just as much right to be offended by your child's dress as you do to not be. Having raised two wonderful young men who are now in college, I do speak from some recent experience.

 

I was thinking along similar lines... not so much has to focus on 'fashion sense' or if someone chooses to 'express' themselves in their own way..but more so the blatant ignoring of simple rules... or maybe I should say 'bending of the rules'. It seems that people will bend the rules to suit themselves...however, when does this stop?

 

Wasn't there an incident where Prince Harry recently showed up to a party wearing an SS uniform or similar?!!? He was just 'expressing himself' too, and I'm sure there are quite a few out there would agree, and consider there was nothing wrong with his actions...'boys will be boys'.

 

once again, where do we draw the line??

[tef43]

What exactly is wrong with asking your children to conform with the request to dress up some for the evenings?

Better yet, what is wrong with *telling* them to conform to the suggested dress for the evening? You are paying for the trip, not the child.

[alylee777]

Goin,

 

We have a table for 4 so the only ones who will be dealing with the gameboy are his Dad and I. If we were sitting with others it would be another story. Personally I think he will be so excited to be there the gameboy will be unecessary. My rule is be prepared! :D

[jbond]

I'm getting tired of those who ask a question and then get offended when they don't get the answer they wanted. Why ask if you don't want to hear other opinions?

I'm confused. The OP asked the question, but when did she get offended? Maybe my computer has dropped some respnses, but I don't recall her ever reposting.

I'd say let your son wear his duct tape tie. The formal pictures will be priceless in another 20 years.

[Chucksta63]

LOL! Norwalk is a virus... :D

 

And I'll take the duct tape tie and high tops over a child bringing a gameboy to the dinner table. To each his own, but it's not very courteous of fellow tablemates... just my opinion.

 

Happy cruising!!!

I'm with you on this GC. No Gameboys at the dinner table! Leave if you must play, and take your parents with you, but RESPECT the others having dinner. Just my Opinion Too! I have an 11 year old too, and it is glued to him. He can bring it with him, but if it comes out at the table, he knows I have know problem throwing it over board.

[Chucksta63]

Better yet, what is wrong with *telling* them to conform to the suggested dress for the evening? You are paying for the trip, not the child.

Your right here Tef43 who is the parent? Tell them what it's going to be. To many parents want to be their kids best friend, Wrong. Your the Parent, set some rules, and have the back-bone to stand by your decision. We are doing Family pictures formal night and my 11 year old boy WILL be wearing a tux with dad, and mom in her best. Now that he knows what is expected of him for formal night, he can't wait to get dressed up. He can't wait to get it off eather and that is fine too.

kids just want to please us, there like dogs. Show them what is expected of them and they are more than happy to go with the program.

It's all about Respect like Aritha said. Get it now, if you don't, it is harder in the later years. If you don't, then you have to wait untill they have kids, and start to call and appoligise to you, for what there kids are doing. lol I have.;)