Here I go again...

[jplotts865]

Well...just got off RCL's beautifully refurbished Empress of the Seas -- fourth time on this perfectly sized cruiser and had the usual wonderful time. However, once again I find myself amazed at the people (usually men) who still insist on coming to dinner in the dining room in shorts and t-shirts! Even though there is an alternative restaurant or cabin room service...here they come...everyone else is essentially properly attired and Mr. Slob stomps into the room in sneakers, those damned shorts and that wrinkled old t-shirt! I did discuss this with the Hotel Manager on board and he indicated that "they are pretty good at redirecting these people" but, still they come. Don't these guys feel a little...well...out of place? Or do they simply not care? I am tired of the old "I paid my fare and I'll wear what I want" refrain...so could they come up with something new? The guys are the worst...some of the get-ups the gals wear are kind of out there as well but...gee...these guys have being a slob down to a science. So, what's the deal here...to me "casual" is slacks and a shirt with a collar and perhaps long sleeves (I wear slacks, dress shirt and jacket but no tie) not shorts. Admittedly style, elegance and good manners are dying fast but must it go quite so quickly??? Do tell...

[ladycaveat]

Just be glad you aren't married to one of these . . . "I paid my money - I'll dress anyway I want." :p Were I married to one of these guys (thank goodness I'm not) . . . I'd dress so formal (on formal nights) that he would stand out even more! :)

[ryansmemom]

Jay,

 

I agree with you 100%. Fortunately, my husband agrees as well. He enjoys dressing up. He dislikes the slob of the day look as much as I do.

 

We choose our cruiseline based on the target demographics. Call us snobs if you want, but I don't see it that way. It's really not snobbery. It's just lifestyle preference. We want to enjoy the company of people who share the same lifestyle choices we do and who share the same values.I think most people would feel the same way.

 

The part I don't understand is why some people insist on crashing the party. It would be just as inappropriate for my husband and me to show up in our formal wear on an all casual cruise as it is for someone to show up in shorts and a tee shirt on formal night.

 

When in Rome.......

 

Linda

[Happy ks]

ladycaveat, I think the OP is a guy :) .

 

I have found the best thing to do is ignore them. It really won't affect your dinner one way or another and I think people like this are trying to get attention. Think of them like Stuart Smalley "see what I can do?!"

 

I would be mortified to walk into a room dressed that casually, many of us would, but we're not going to change anyones mind about it. Enjoy the company you're with and hopefully, it isn't with someone who offends you so. I have to say (although it was winter and no shorts), our favorite table mates so far have been with people who did not dress what I would call appropriately. I got over it real quick and we had a ball every night at dinner.

[jplotts865]

I'm enjoying the responses as this issue is one I find fascinating. The lady I was traveling with and I often sat in one of the lounges watching people go in to dinner and found the passing parade most interesting. I am not a snob, far from it actually, yet it continues to amaze me as I see these people so seemingly oblivious to the very minimal "rules" for dinner. I should think they'd simply be more comfortable up in the Windjammer Cafe (RCL's casual resturant) or, barring that, having dinner in their cabin. Perhaps if they realized a few people were looking at them and asking these questions? On the other hand, in today's world, I don't think people really care -- it's very much a "me" generation now. I DO accept the fact that this is the way it is now but I certainly don't agree with it. I now rather enjoy looking as nice as possible whilst in my "casual" mode knowing quite a few people might look at me as nearly in "formal" attire. I also wish the younger guys would leave their damned baseball caps in the cabin...

[Happy ks]

Jay, unfortunately the only answer I have for you is that I'm trying to teach my children casual vs. sloppy.

 

I observed the same thing last week watching people boarding the ship. The majority of people were dressed casually, which is absolutely fine. But, there were those few who wore clothing suitable for yard work and below, they just don't get it and they never will.

 

But, I'm not going to be the fashion police for anyone but myself and my family. Sometimes I do not believe what my teens will wear to school, then I drive them there and see how the other kids are dressed!

[Jane110]

I'm enjoying the responses as this issue is one I find fascinating. The lady I was traveling with and I often sat in one of the lounges watching people go in to dinner and found the passing parade most interesting. I am not a snob, far from it actually, yet it continues to amaze me as I see these people so seemingly oblivious to the very minimal "rules" for dinner. I should think they'd simply be more comfortable up in the Windjammer Cafe (RCL's casual resturant) or, barring that, having dinner in their cabin. Perhaps if they realized a few people were looking at them and asking these questions? On the other hand, in today's world, I don't think people really care -- it's very much a "me" generation now. I DO accept the fact that this is the way it is now but I certainly don't agree with it. I now rather enjoy looking as nice as possible whilst in my "casual" mode knowing quite a few people might look at me as nearly in "formal" attire. I also wish the younger guys would leave their damned baseball caps in the cabin...

 

Unfortunately, we just have to accept the fact that some people are pigs and there's nothing you can do about it.

 

I went to a chruch wedding last year where the groom's friends and family showed up in cut-offs and flip flops. On the brides side, we were all dressed elegantly and appropriately - from the 6 year old's to the 60 year old's.

 

I would hope that a cruiseline would as least request that a man take his hat off in the dining room.

 

Jane

[lel5344]

Personally, I am always much more comfortable when I am dressed appropriately, at least. And I never worry about overdressing. If I am the only one at a party with a jacket and tie, I can remove them, if I choose (or I can be admired for my wardrobe...lol).

 

I believ the cruise lines provide more than adequate information regarding the mode of dress, and I like adhering to their "requirements." It's easy enough for us to choose a cruise line based on how it will fit our life style. If we choose to never dress up, we can free style it on NCL. If we want to have the formal opportunities, we might choose Celebrity.

 

But that works for me. I still won't be judgmental about how other people dress. I may comment and/or question, but I won't judge. I will reserve my critical judgments for people who are out-and-out rude, inconsiderate and boorish. The way one dresses does not automatically qualify one for inclusion among the boors.

[CDRMark]

IMO the majority of people dressed "inappropriately" (and defining that can be tough) are not doing it intentionally. They have not been taught, taken time to learn, or simply don't know. The "I'll show them" factor exists, but is pretty small. And some of them lost their luggage.:)

 

Cheers

MarkB

[mrsred]

IMO the majority of people dressed "inappropriately" (and defining that can be tough) are not doing it intentionally. They have not been taught, taken time to learn, or simply don't know. The "I'll show them" factor exists, but is pretty small. And some of them lost their luggage.:)

 

Cheers

MarkB

 

I concur. Many people don't understand the difference between casual, semi-formal and formal. And as CDRMark has pointed out, defining formal or even semi-formal can be difficult especially when it differs from state to state, or even regionally.

 

The one thing I have noticed is that there is a large contingent of the "I don't care" crowd, which is a reflection upon society as a whole..and on themselves. Manners and other protocals developed by society were created with the intent to make others more comfortable in OUR company, which does not translate well to the "I don't care" group since they seem to be more concerned with how things are going in their own universe.

 

I am not concerned with what others wear as it doesn't affect me at all. We do enjoy dressing "up" and choose our cruises, and other vacation and entertainment venues accordingly. We don't decide who we will or will not befriend according to their attire, that would be silly IMO, but we tend to meet other like minded people because of the places we frequent.

 

If someone does at least try to meet the standards then I applaud them for the effort. If they ask for assistance then I am willing to help to the best of my ability.

 

Those who don't care...I wish them well.

 

~e

[beth4652]

I believe that people should at least make an effort to conform to the published dress codes. I realize that some could not take the cruise if they had to spend a bundle on clothes that they would not wear otherwise. However, "clean and pressed" can go a long way. My children who cruise with us are 19-24 years old. They very much enjoy dressing up. My 20 year old DS loves putting on his tux. My children were taught years ago to leave their "grubbies" for gardening and school (LOL). IMHO, your dress reflects your manners.

[gjules]

I can honestly say that on my first cruise I really didn't pay any attention to what others were wearing. I feel that I dressed appropriately; I wore a formal for formal night, did not wear jeans ANYwhere and always wore a skirt in the dining room-no shorts or tanks or flip flops! But, I was so in awe of the ship and my experience, the people around me could have been dressed in sackcloth and I wouldn't have known or cared! However, now that I've been on these boards, I will probably notice more what others are wearing!

My dd, dm and I have already decided we want to dress 'up' the entire time on our cruise. We have sundresses or skirts for dinner each night. To us, this trip is a once in a lifetime, with all 3 generations together. Also, my dd is a college student, I work in a VERY casual environment and dm is retired from a factory job. We are looking forward to having the chance to dress up and look good in our pictures!!:)

All that said, I would still dress appropriately because that's what the rules say. Also, I'd rather stand out for looking GOOD than looking bad!!!:rolleyes: