Formal night for a Temperamental Teen

[MostlyHarmless]

I know this forum focuses mostly on younger children, and as the parent of a 5-year-old, I appreciate the advice. I am blessed to have as well a 14-year-old, who oscillates between angel and evil, but never passes through the "fun to dress up" region. She likes to skateboard and shop, spent her whole childhood trying to be a boy, but now actually owns a really short skirt, which I can not suggest she wear or I am, again, an idiot. Sigh.

 

I think there's about an 80% chance that she will threaten to jump overboard when she hears about Formal Night, so the question is this: do the Teens have an alternative dining option on Formal Night that will let me have my lobster (without which I will threaten to jump overboard as well) and avoid anything worse for her than a skirt? Formal gowns are absolutely out of the question, until she figures out that they are expensive and impractical. Then we'll buy one. But I've got a year or two there (please!).

 

Can she do a teen thing and let me eat my crustacean in peace (and butter)?

[kitty9]

Some cruise lines will have a pizza party or an informal dinner on the formal nights. But, once she sees all the other girls all decked out in their pretty clothes, she might just change her mind. As a teacher, I can tell you that it's not too often when a teen wants to look way different than all the others on a cruise ship. Do you know of any other people who have cruised with teens? Are they friends of your daughter? Maybe they have pictures of their formal night experiences you could show her, and have her see what other teen girls are wearing. Other than that, you have to pick your fights, and if clothing is the least of your worries, then just let her wear what she's comfortable with, but I would guess that once she sees everyone dressed to the nines, she might change her attitude.

[leenie29]

I know this forum focuses mostly on younger children, and as the parent of a 5-year-old, I appreciate the advice. I am blessed to have as well a 14-year-old, who oscillates between angel and evil, but never passes through the "fun to dress up" region. She likes to skateboard and shop, spent her whole childhood trying to be a boy, but now actually owns a really short skirt, which I can not suggest she wear or I am, again, an idiot. Sigh.

 

I think there's about an 80% chance that she will threaten to jump overboard when she hears about Formal Night, so the question is this: do the Teens have an alternative dining option on Formal Night that will let me have my lobster (without which I will threaten to jump overboard as well) and avoid anything worse for her than a skirt? Formal gowns are absolutely out of the question, until she figures out that they are expensive and impractical. Then we'll buy one. But I've got a year or two there (please!).

 

Can she do a teen thing and let me eat my crustacean in peace (and butter)?

 

It depends on what cruiseline you are on. Some lines/ships have alternative dining where you can feed them before casually and then send them to the kid's club, while you eat a nice formal dinner without the kids. Some have lines/ships have special kid's night dinners so that the parents can eat a formal meal in peace. We try to find cruise lines that have alternative venue dining to avoid the whole formal night dressing issue. This year we are sailing on the Caribbean Princess and two years ago we were on the NCL Dawn. Both lines have anytime dining which we love and places to eat if you don't want to get dressed up. I have two boys ages 7 & 11 and they hate getting dressed up. I'm lucky if I can get them in khaki's and a button down shirt without too much screaming and tugging. Ties and jackets are out of the question!

 

HTH,

Eileen

[banditmag]

I have a teenage daughter who is exactly the same way. She is 16 and make-up had never touched her face and she wouldn't be caught dead in a dress. We went on a 10 day cruise over the holidays that had 3 formal nights. Before we left I let her get a fancy hair cut, scheduled us both for a "make-up lesson", and pushed the idea of how nice it would be to have a formal portrait of the two of us. We had a blast at the make up lesson and she loves her hair. She ended up buying one long gown and a cocktail length dress. The first formal night I scheduled an appointment at the spa for us to get our hair put in up-dos. I think, although she won't admit it, that she had a good time. She looked gorgeous and I KNOW she enjoyed the attention she received from several gentlemen her own age. It was a great way for us to spend time together (does my make-up look okay? what do you think of this handbag?) and I love the pictures.

 

I also agree with the previous poster that teens want to fit in - I know mine was happy that we were the two best dressed, hottest looking chicks on the ship. :D

 

Sorry to report she is back to hair in a ponytail, no make-up, and wearing Nike Shorts and tshirts (new ones at least from all of the ports :) ) , don't know how she does that, we live in Chicago. She has gotten great enjoyment from showing her pictures to friends who never thought they would see her "dressed to the nines".

 

I hope you can convince your daughter, we really did have fun and neither one of us are "girly girls." Good luck.

[MostlyHarmless]

We're on Carnival. I'm hoping to convince her to join the dress-up fun, but if she can only muster the short skirt, is that ok? I think it looks like a cheerleader outfit, but I can't say that out loud. Teenage girls are like land mines. Boom! :eek: (yes, I'm Dad)

[banditmag]

Yes, she could get away with the short skirt (the one that barely covers the butt?) My daughter wore several skirts like that on smart casual nights and I always made sure she had shorts on. The great thing about being younger is that people cut you some slack. It was funny, my daughter told her friends she dressed up because it made her mom happy but deep down, under that surly, grumpy face I think she enjoyed it. I was only a convenient excuse.