Does your occupation really matter?

[halos]

I have read the 2 threads posted on this X board and on Carnival board about the differences in the two cruise lines.

We have an X cruise booked but have only been on RCL - never X or Carnival. We chose our X cruise because of what we read on this board, the itinerary and the ship.

On the Carnival thread, they seemed to think X cruisers were snobs who asked what your occupation was 15 minutes after they met you. This can't be true, right?

I am a school librarian and my husband is a carpenter. I would hate to think we would be "looked down on" because we're not in the "money" professions.

 

 

I think you should be proud of what you do!! If you love what you do every day and someone looks down on you, they are the losers. Besides, being a librarian and a carpenter is NOTHING to be ashamed of...hell, I think it's probably awesome to be married to a carpenter (my first thought would be that your home must be gorgeous) ...and I spend a lot of time reading and at the library, so if my DH and I came upon you on a cruise ship and the subject of careers came up, we'd have a lot to chat about I'm sure :)

[Joanandjoe]

It's hard for us to imagine that people on a cruise could get snobby about other people's occupations. How can you have fun if you're putting other people down? We haven't seen a lot of snobbery on X, or even on Radisson and Windstar.

 

There's nothing wrong, Leela, in being just a housewife. I was lucky enough to have a job that enabled Joan to be home with our kids during most of our marriage, even though she has a Masters degree in library science. Now that we're empty nesters, she's a part time librarian, and considers herself "semi-retired".

 

Leela, I'm sure that you and Joan will have interesting convesations on our cruise about the "joys" of being at home. Joe

[suzeyQ]

No, your occupation doesn't matter but I don't think it's rude to ask the question either, at least in Canada/US. I usually ask what people do for a living so that we have something to talk about (especially when we don't seem to have much else to talk about). I'm not sure I'd ask it in the first 15 minutes though...

 

Having said that, there will always be people who judge you based on your occupation, just like they'll judge you based on whether you're carrying a designer purse or staying in a suite vs. an inside cabin. You'll find those people on every cruiseline and I say let them judge you. Do you really care if you're being judged negatively by people who are that shallow? :D

[tserface]

No, your occupation doesn't matter but I don't think it's rude to ask the question either, at least in Canada/US. I usually ask what people do for a living so that we have something to talk about (especially when we don't seem to have much else to talk about). I'm not sure I'd ask it in the first 15 minutes though...

 

I think the question is friendly enough. What would be rude would be an inappropriate response like, "why don't you get a real job!" I've asked the question several times in casual conversation over the year and I've had instant repoire with people on many occasions.

 

The question is not wrong, but the response to the answer might be rude enough depending...

 

Tom

[suzeyQ]

Well yes, that response would definitely be offensive!! I would like to think that it would only be a rare few people who would give that response though!!

[chicagolass]

Hi Fredr,

Thanks ever so much. You've made me feel even more glad

to be sailing on the Galaxy to the Med.10/06/06. Wherever

you sail, let me wish you and yours "Bon Voyage."

 

Chris

[Bandas]

I'm so glad I read this post -

 

I never, ever, in a million years, thought I would be making someone feel uncomfortable, or that I would be considered a snob by asking what their occupation was:o. Oh my gosh, I do it all the time as a way of striking up conversation. Along with where they work, I also ask if they've cruised before, where do they live, do they have children, grandchildren, what their hobbies are, etc.... I'm truly interested in people's lives and what makes their faces light up! However, I guess in the future, I'll wait at least 16 minutes before I ask someone about their occupation:D

 

Amber14, go on your cruise, be yourself, and have a great time!

[Tropicalgal]

Perhaps a better measure of true intelligence is defined by how well or not we cope or function in our world with others that we meet from all walks of life and in the world of cruising. Such intelligence or unintelligence is common to all humans; therefore, it would seem that it must include those who travel on all cruiseships. One's title or occupation has little to do with it.

 

This reminds me of the alternative to the widely known Intelligent Quotient (I.Q.)... which is known as the E.Q. Emotional Quotient.

The EQ concept argues that IQ, or conventional intelligence, is too narrow; that there are wider areas of emotional intelligence that dictate and enable how successful we are. Success requires more than IQ (Intelligence Quotient), which has tended to be the traditional measure of intelligence, ignoring essential behavioural and character elements. We've all met people who are academically brilliant and yet are socially and inter-personally inept. And we know that despite possessing a high IQ rating, success does not automatically follow...

We have a much more effective question to find out about fellow travellers... "What do you do for fun?" ... works for us :p :p :p

[Lane40]

Your occupation should not matter. But, it does bring up an interesting point for my wife and I. The issue of occupation and people wanting to discuss occupations is one of the reasons why we normally attempt to sit at a table for 2 or sit at a table with only those individuals who are in our party.

 

Now, that is not the only reason for exclusivity. Because of our occupations, we do not have the opportunity to spend as much "together" time as we both wish we could. Thus, when we go on a cruise, we attempt to spend as much "together" time as possible.

[greyblueseas]

This is really interesting for me. Naturally, sailing with X is about the type of cruise experience you want, whatever your background or occupation. But asking what people "do" is a standard conversation opener in the UK as well, and one I have been sensitive to since I started having difficulty in finding employment a couple of years ago. I have turned down invitations that would involve meeting new people as the question is inevitable and always brings tears to my eyes as I don't know what to say. For me, it is quite courageous to be meeting new people and risking getting asked the question at the end of April! :)

[shonuf]

We have a much more effective question to find out about fellow travellers... "What do you do for fun?" ... works for us :p :p :p [/font]

 

I have used the above question in interviewing prospective employees. It can tell you way more about a person than the resume ever could.

 

A couple takes on the "what do you do" question. One time I was on a plane and asked my seatmate "the" question. His response, "I sell colostomy bags". I don't remember the rest of the the conversation. :)

 

A couple years ago we were at a table for eight, two couples travelling solo and 2 couples travelling together. Final night, we were exchanging addresses, etc. and one lady hands me her business card. It had her name and lots of alphabet soup following her name. I said, "I recognize some of these degrees but not everything." She was an emergency room physician from Canada. I wouldn't have guessed that one in a million years, and I've been in the medical field for most of my life.

 

I don't have a problem with anyone asking me what I do, even though for the last year I "haven't done". Just don't talk politics to me.

[Sky Sweet]

In this day and age, I don't think most people judge others by how they chose to earn a living. The question just frequently comes up during a cruise as a way to start a convervation.

 

However, I do think there are way too many people who judge others by their wealth, or lack of it, without even considering if that person earned their money ethically or helped society in the process. In my opinion, that mindset discourages our youth from striving to become the best they can be, and knowing what is really important in life.

[Amber14]

I loved reading all of the comments by everyone, and Fredr, thanks for your very kind words.

Let me start by clarifying that my husband and I are NOT embarrassed by our professions at all. I love what I do, and despite the low pay, I know I am helping children everyday!!!

I only started this thread because I've never sailed Celebrity before and you sometimes hear that the people that sail Celebrity are SNOBS! I have read several comments on certain posts that would lead me to believe this.

I definitely do not believe this now based on what I have heard on this thread alone. You seem like wonderful people who would be happy to share conversation, wine, beer, and whatever, no matter what the occupation!

Thanks for all the comments. I can't wait for my first Celebrity cruise- and as you can see it's a year off. We, unfortunately, cannot travel every 6 months like some of you. I will definitely post a review of our first X experience. I'm sure it will be great. We love cruising, having a good time, sitting by the pool with a drink, dressing up for dinner - all of the things that cruising is known for!

Thanks again for all of your comments. I was afraid to post at first, but feel much better now about our cruise.

I hope to sail with some of you in the future!

[chicagolass]

Hi Tropicalgal,

Your statements ring true! They point the way to that elusive

"golden mean," the ideal balance between the head (I.Q.) and

the heart (E.Q.)

 

But first things first -- FUN. Hope you won't mind if I adopt your

fun question as the ideal ice-breaker on the high seas:

"What do you do for fun?" Thank you.

 

Chris.

 

p.s.Amber, you folks have great fun!

[surfklutz]

I believe that when you first meet someone, you should ask them about their "interests" - that also leaves people open to talk about their travels, or their hobbies - OR their jobs.

 

If you become friends with people on a cruise, it is a natural question that comes later, it is part of learning about people that you are interested in.

 

When I am on a cruise, I do like the Vegas ads do - I make something up! To tell them what I really do would just bore them. Sometimes my husband's mouth just drops when he hears me. Now if we really become close, I will fess up and everyone realizes that I have just spared them details of a very dull line of work!

[Tropicalgal]

[quote name='chicagolass']Hope you won't mind if I adopt your
fun question as the ideal ice-breaker on the high seas:
"What do you do for fun?" Thank you[/quote]

[FONT=Fixedsys][COLOR=magenta]Of course not... you just go right ahead :p [/COLOR][/FONT]
[FONT=Fixedsys][COLOR=#ff00ff]One day, maybe, we'll both ask each other that question on the high seas :p [/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Fixedsys][COLOR=#ff00ff]Amber14... hope you have a wonderful trip... our first cruise is on the Carnival Valor (big family party) this summer. Never thought I'd be cruising in a million years (claustrophobic)... and if I did, thought it would be on HAL or Celebrity! Take a great attitude, and you'll have fun no matter where you are :p [/COLOR][/FONT]

[Lane40]

[quote name='tangerinebunny']Yes! It is rude to ask people what they do for a living. Many of us on vacation want to leave work behind. Others are tired of being asked for free professional advice. And no, there's no stopping someone from asking, but don't expect to be considered socially adept when you do.[/QUOTE]

Could not have put it any better. Good post.

[dmarch@islc.net]

It's been my experience extremely judgmental people are, well sort of boring so who cares what they think. It's your cruise...enjoy!

[starketcher]

I have a master's degree and work for the government. My husband who says he barely graduated high school drives a truck for a well-known company. Guess who makes the most money??? My husband! Do I think anywone judges him or me...they probably do, but I could careless.

I invested well over the years, he has a very good job that he likes, I work part-time. OUr homes, cars,e tc. are paid for and we vacation a couple times a year....so if anyone has a problem with our occupations, then that is their problem. We are quite happy and comfortable, so it really does not matter to me or to him what anyone else thinks. Ask away--we'll be glad to tell you what we do bcs this past Thursday we had a granddaughter...so she might be more important in our conversation than driving or selling stamps!

[chicagolass]

[quote name='greyblueseas']This is really interesting for me. Naturally, sailing with X is about the type of cruise experience you want, whatever your background or occupation. But asking what people "do" is a standard conversation opener in the UK as well, and one I have been sensitive to since I started having difficulty in finding employment a couple of years ago. I have turned down invitations that would involve meeting new people as the question is inevitable and always brings tears to my eyes as I don't know what to say. For me, it is quite courageous to be meeting new people and risking getting asked the question at the end of April! :)[/quote]

Hi Greyblueseas, how about answering with: "Work is what we do and it's such a necessary evil. Ugh! Instead, let's discuss who we are and where we're going on this trip." Hmmmmm!

[Fredr]

Hello,

That is one very smart trucker...he is married to a well educated gal with a reasonably secure job who knows her IRAs, stock tables and probably the best buys in real estate in his neck of the woods. And she probably takes very good care of him (cooks, cleans, and sews). Seriously though the level of education has nothing to do with kindness, intelligence, and other values that we all hold in high esteem. Sounds like both of you are very fortunate to have found each other.

Take care,

Fred

[Sky Sweet]

After reading this thread, I will think twice before asking a fellow passenger about their occupation to start a conversation. A tablemate on one our cruises once asked me, "What do you do to keep busy when you are not on a cruise". That is probably a good alternative because it gives someone the opportunity to answer with a number of different options such as discussing career, hobbies, or family.

[shofer]

As often as we've cruised and sat w/strangers at a dinner table, I've often found it educational & entertaining for people to discuss what they do for a living. I am amazed at the range of occupations there are out there.

I always preface my comments w/the fact that in my generation (early baby boomers) that women were nurses, secretaries and teachers. I myself am a nurse. Sometimes I get medical questions but since my focus is OB/GYNE, that squashes the men quickly and the women are too embarressed to ask any questions in mixed company.

I guess it could be rude but as a previous poster mentioned there are all the standard questions when you are dining w/someone for a week and getting to know one another. Maybe as Americans we are forthright but rudeness is sometimes is a matter of degree.

[chicagolass]

From dmarch --Quote: Jesus was a carpenter.
...It's been my experience extremely
judgmental people are well sort of boring...

Hi dmarch,

Amen! Judge not lest ye be judged.

But, let's hope that "critics" are granted a dispensation.

[RonnieS]

I always remember what Robert Fulghum (author of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten) said when asked "What do you do for a living". He said "I breathe air".