Some Suggestions for Polite Crusing

[Happy ks]

We've run the gamut from fussy babies all the way to seniors butting in front of us and stepping on our nicely manicured toes. It's just people and there's no way everyone else is going to live the way you want them to. I find the best thing to do is to be gracious, understand that you cannot know what they are experiencing and walk away if you cannot tolerate it. If you cannot walk away, say you are in your stateroom and others are talking loudly in the hallway, ask politely that they stop. If you have kids playing in the elevators, ask them politely to stop. It's wonderful what a little kindness and manners can accomplish. Too many times I read here how people want to tell others off, or yell at kids for misbehaving, no wonder there's a bunch of hate going on!

 

If you have a screaming baby next to you in the dining room, stuff your ears with the napkins, because the parents obviously don't get it. Kids scream in the dining room because they are tired, worn out, stressed out, they need to sleep. Babies and toddlers don't whine, fuss and scream when they are well rested and happy. I have 2 kids of my own and used to care for others' children, so I have plenty of experience with babies and toddlers. If you have seniors stepping on your toes, just remember, you will be ther some day and hopefully you will have people around that will be gracious to you. If you are a senior, please be kind to others, you don't have the right to treat people rudely because you are older than them.

 

If you try to be as nice as you can to everybody you see, smile at everyone, you will be disarming and they will want to behave better in front of you. Try walking around the ship, meet others eyes and smile, they can't help but smile back at you.

 

Treat the staff with the utmost respect, they are there to serve you, but they are not your servant. Ask them about their homes and families, we have met the very nicest people that way.

 

Don't assume that because people are dressed in less than what you may wear yourself that they are beneath you, you may be in for a surprise. Talk to them, get to know them, most people are very nice, if you give them a chance.

 

The most important thing to remember is to treat others the way you would like to be treated. And...pretend everyone else is having a great time around you, don't listen to the grouches.

[like2cruise]

Life is short...vacation is shorter...so enjoy every magical moment that cruising offers and let all the things/people that irritate you just roll off your back as you have better things to do...besides in about one week you will be back to work and all you will have are the memories...so make them good ones :p

[2Cruise4Ever]

Aside for not answering my question, I am sorry to inform you that I am from the generation where children were to be seen and not heard. I was taught that one always stood when an older person entered the room and to always call older people by Mr. Mrs. or Miss. And when must pass by or between two people having a conversation to say excuse me.

 

My daughter was also taught that one did not disrupt other people's space with loud noise or crying. If she did have an outburst, she was immediately taken into the ladies room by my wife and it was explained to her from a very early age that such behavior was not correct and when she was ready to control herself she could return to the table or room. Always worked like a charm.

 

I can say that both I and my daughter enjoyed a very pleasant childhood knowing the rules and boundaries.

 

I just wish that parents of today would make the effort to do the same instead of expecting others to suick it in and tolerate bad behavior because everyone has "rights". Maybe if they did take the extra effort (my mother managed it with four boys) the world would be a better place.

 

So, crying is considered bad behavior????? My observation is that women of your generation (when brought up by people of your attitude and presumptions) were taught to not have an opinion, a career, and their feelings didn't matter. I, too, teach my children to address adults as Mrs., Ms. or Mr. and to say excuse me and pardon. But, I also teach them that having feelings is perfectly acceptable. If my children cry for more than a few minutes, I do remove them from the public situation. If they are unruly, defiant, or running around, they are removed from the situation. My son is 7 years old and everywhere we go, I am given compliments about how well behaved he is with "pleases" and "thank-you's." BUT, he also knows that he can express his opinion and his feelings when he is scared, frustrated, or confused.

 

Telling a baby that she is not allowed to cry is like telling you that you're not allowed to breathe. Yelling and laughing outside my cabin at 3:00 a.m. is rude. But, demanding that parents not go into public places or telling children that they are not allowed to cry is just plain cruel.

 

By the way, EVERYONE DOES have rights. It's written in our constitution.

[MrsBoo]

If all parents were as responsible as you, there wouldn't be so many complaints about unruly kids:) .

[tumeroll]

Yes we do have rights that are in the constitution and in the Declaration of Independance, Generally the right to the PURSUITof Happiness. That is not the right to happiness and to date though I have looked long and hard I have never been able to find the right to do what ever I want to do to the detriment of others.

 

If you know where I can find that right please let me know then I can get into the 21 century and be just like what seems to be the rest of the population. But until I actually find it in writting, I will stick with my old fashioned beliefs that one should excercise sufficient restraint so as to not be objectionable to others in my level of behavior and that of my offspring.

[2Cruise4Ever]

If all parents were as responsible as you, there wouldn't be so many complaints about unruly kids:) .

 

Thank you MrsBoo. My DH and I work very hard to discipline our kids (some actually criticise me for being TOO hard on them :) ). But, the main thing is: we really have fun with our kids. We enjoy being with them very much, while also maintaining a balance to have some alone time with each other as well (alone?? what does THAT mean??? :p ).

[2Cruise4Ever]

Yes we do have rights that are in the constitution and in the Declaration of Independance, Generally the right to the PURSUITof Happiness. That is not the right to happiness and to date though I have looked long and hard I have never been able to find the right to do what ever I want to do to the detriment of others.

 

If you know where I can find that right please let me know then I can get into the 21 century and be just like what seems to be the rest of the population. But until I actually find it in writting, I will stick with my old fashioned beliefs that one should excercise sufficient restraint so as to not be objectionable to others in my level of behavior and that of my offspring.

 

Tumeroll, I agree with you 100% on that point. My DH and I do our best to "not be objectionable to others" but not to the detriment of us or our children. I have a great respect for my elders and I love to sit and listen to my father-in-law (now 85) tell stories about WWII (he was a fighter pilot). He loves his grand-kids and would never dream of asking me to remove them from his presence no matter how unruly they get :) (or any other children for that matter ~ he has tremendous patience!). I have seen some "parents" who don't parent at all. They are the ones who give the rest of us a bad reputation. I only disagree that children are "to be seen and not heard." Think of how dull this world would be without the laughter of children.

[barbgazz]

The laughter of child is delightful but the whining and crying are annoying. If your kids whine and cry, leave the room.

 

Yes, crying children are disturbing to everyone but you.

[Catnip]

Dophins,

VERY well said..............;) I agree with you all the way............

[smeyer418]

Yes the good old days...when people were starving no saftey net. Blacks couldn't eat at the same restuarants. No social security- the elderly were among the poorest in society. Jews were limited in the numbers that could go to certain schools. But the kids weren't spolied...what were the names of those two kids that killed another child for fun? and we were about to have the second world war that killed how many people...

 

yes the good old days.

[shoreguy]

Yes the good old days...when people were starving no saftey net. Blacks couldn't eat at the same restuarants. No social security- the elderly were among the poorest in society. Jews were limited in the numbers that could go to certain schools. But the kids weren't spolied...what were the names of those two kids that killed another child for fun? and we were about to have the second world war that killed how many people...

 

yes the good old days.

 

But a least there were no crying babies in the ships dining room :D

 

Time to lighten up a bit.

[2Cruise4Ever]

The laughter of child is delightful but the whining and crying are annoying. If your kids whine and cry, leave the room.

 

Yes, crying children are disturbing to everyone but you.

 

I never said that it isn't annoying to me. You can't have laughter without some crying. Am I to presume you never cried as a child?????? We will leave the room when it becomes too much (more than a few minutes) as I have said many, many times. I also assume that you don't have any children of your own. One thing my mother taught me before she died: don't judge another until you have walked a mile in his shoes. Have you walked a mile in mine? I doubt it.

[smeyer418]

ok :) but I have had it with all the smugness I have seen here in the last few days...there is a maudlin-ness to it that is down right unreal...I have tried to lighten it up and then my posts go poof...

[whale-watcher]

I respectfully suggest that perhaps the truancy advocates share the same motives as their "stuffy" critics. We are both seeking an idyllic cruise away from other people's kids?

Because we homeschool our children, we tend to cruise during off-peak travel times, but also strive to make the trip educational as well as enjoyable. That being said, we also don't demand that our kids join us for dinner in the dining room if they are not in the mood for a longer meal; we either eat as a family at the buffet, or feed the kids early (roomservice or buffet) and then let them play in the kid's center while we enjoy a more leisurely late dinner on our own. We were considering a courtyard villa on a fall canada/new england sailing of the NCL Jewel for our next cruise (this would be our first with NCL), and while our kids are well behaved as a general rule, the do laugh and joke and play -- we hope that this doesn't cause distress for others using the courtyard pool area, but even well behaved kids do play!

[shoreguy]

ok :) but I have had it with all the smugness I have seen here in the last few days...there is a maudlin-ness to it that is down right unreal...I have tried to lighten it up and then my posts go poof...

 

relax - they were unreal - we all need to focus on those things that give us joy.

[angelsx4]

Enjoy the children around you on the cruise. I remember the saying a Kindergarten teacher posted somewhere, "I promise not to believe everything your child says if you do the same." LOL! Just look at all the free entertainment! My kinder twins came home and told me Mrs. Ewing was going to dress up as Mary Juana for Halloween. She just about peed her pants when I told her. They had the D.A.R.E. officer come in that same day and talk to them about Just Say No to Drugs and they got "Madeline" and "marijuana" mixed up.

 

When you see them in the elevators ask them not only how they are enjoying the cruise, but how their parents are enjoying the cruise, and listen to their memorable words. Make faces, hold bunny ears over their dad's head, and just lighten up. We were on the Elation 2 years ago with my sil(minus our children), we were missing all our kids so much. It lifted us up to go poke our nose in the kids center, and we actually "liked" to hang around the families, especially those with kids our age. The kids playing in the elevator stopped when we engaged them in a little conversation and paid attention to them. Also, just tell them there's fresh pizza and they'll leave.

 

My best advice is just come on the ship with a great attitude and you'll have a good time.

[SeattleChris]

When my children run through the dining area screaming, they are usually only doing so because I've been in the bar all day and they haven't had anything to eat. So please be considerate and let them pick food from your plate-- you're not the only one who pays for the food you know. Usually they only take a small bite and will put the rest back, so please just be a little patient and understanding. Once they're full, I'd appreciate it if you could flag down the Kids Crew leader to escort them back onto the pool deck. The kids have their own lounge chairs which we keep reserved 24/7-- I'd prefer that they take their naps there because I don't want them breathing all my cigar smoke in the stateroom.

 

Also, I respectfully request folks to keep their voices down while watching the shows. It just irritates the hell out of me when I'm trying to hear someone on my FRS radio and I have to repeat myself because someone next to me is talking or someone on stage is singing.

 

If you see me cutting in front of you in line, don't take it personally. It annoys me enough that people don't clear the path when I enter the room, but don't you dare make it worse by questioning me when I have to push in front of you. Just apologize and step back. Is that so difficult?

 

Finally, be nice to the staff. It's not their fault that I saved a buck by having my shore excusions and drinks charged to your account. Besides, my kids blew all the money I saved in the casino, so it's not like I'm profiting from your frustration or anything.

 

Oops, gotta go. My son just entered the room so I have to silence this keyboard and stand at attention.

 

Happy cruising everyone.

[DKJ]

On our April 10th cruise when we arrived at our cabin and was enjoying the terrific view...we discovered that we had a screaming 2 yr old in the cabin next to us...after a day or so of it ..I took a look at the mother one day ,as she was gazing out over the balcony..and the frustration in her face calmed me..because we've all been there . In the course of the week ,we shared some cocktails and met the face behind the screams..and he was so cute!!!It all worked out...just have to have patience!!!

[Mexidog]

#4- Don't take children out of school to go on a cruise. There are more than enough holidays during the year.

 

You stop shopping on weekends and I will consider it:)

[Catnip]

and, please don't wear too much perfume or cologne!!!!!! A little bit goes a long way! ;)

[Dolphins]

You stop shopping on weekends and I will consider it:)

 

I never shop on weekends or cruise when schools are not in session.

[TrinaLC]

Those who frequent restaurants would never ask a family to leave the establishment just because a child is having a bad day. Why would a cruise be any different?

 

The point is, you don't keep that child at the table (or in the cinema, or whatever). One parent should get up and take the child out until (s)he is soothed, and if that doesn't work, take him back to the room.

 

I've done that many times with my own. I would never subject a dining room full of folks (or a cinema, or whatever) to a crying child.

 

(And I have 2 youngsters myself.)

 

I do find that a number of persons, though, feel deep down that a cruise should be child free - and/or have unbelievably smug views of themselves and their generation. To these folks, lighten up, enjoy what children have to offer, even if it may be different than when you were raised. As others have pointed out, it wasn't exactly nirvana then.

[whale-watcher]

I do find that a number of persons, though, feel deep down that a cruise should be child free - and/or have unbelievably smug views of themselves and their generation.

And there are cruise lines that don't permit or encourage families with children just for this reason.

But all the mass-market cruise lines (even HAL and Celebrity) do market themselves as family friendly vacations. Why else would they continue to build and upgrade such elaborate children's facilities? And between homeschoolers, international families, not to mention the fact that at any given week some school district in some part of the country is probably on vacation, there is never a time that will be child-free.

[greenie]

Can we maybe get back on track here? How about getting back to different suggestions, not ragging out on just one (children)? :confused:

 

Actually, I'm having trouble coming up with more things (maybe you are too). I saw some of the already-mentioned things happen, but not many. For the most part everybody was pretty cool and nice!

[seahorse]

Can we maybe get back on track here? How about getting back to different suggestions, not ragging out on just one (children)? :confused:

 

Actually, I'm having trouble coming up with more things (maybe you are too). I saw some of the already-mentioned things happen, but not many. For the most part everybody was pretty cool and nice!

 

I agree