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So, most of us on here Love cruising.. and for the most part, we are reasonable people with normal expectations . :) That being said, as many of us have noticed with the shrinking of free services offered and the increase in drink prices and expansion of the "pay to dine restaurants" , many have come to the conclusion that RCCL seems to be pushing people towards packages. That being said, after reading a few too many posts on here, I have a few packages that RCCL may want to start offering. Please feel free to add a few of your own :)

 

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BOILED SHRIMP AND MORE PACKAGE $19.95

". Want to enjoy the sea? Let us treat you Royally with the all new shrimp and more package. . You have had them free for years. Now enjoy the same great bland taste anytime you like(with 15 minutes between rounds).

You can have the usually free option for 19.95 pet day!!! What's the more you ask? The more is along with the 19.95 per day package you also get to pay 18% more for gratuities!

To sign up for this and many other shockingly overpriced packages. Go to the rccl website( if it's working. Lol and just try to log into your my cruises account if it's working. And then hopefully the cruise planner is working) and wallah! Shrimp packages available

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SO YOU WANT TO BOARD THE SHIP BEFORE DINNER PACKAGE $49.95

"Tired of the traffic jam at the port? Tired of waiting outside the door to a newly remodeled terminal because there are too many people inside? In a hurry to get on the ship and and wait in line somewhere else? RCCL proudly introduces the "sail on through" pass. For the low price of $49.95 per person (from the age of 12months and up) . you can skip all the lines and go straight to the only elevator in the port to take you right up (secretly past the salivating group of commission based photographers and straight up to the ship.) Offer available for a limited time only.

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THE ON TIME MY TIME DINING PACKAGE $3.75/day

"Did you really want to get your table at the time you booked it"? Well guess what? Now you can. ( maybe) Just log into your my cruises account sign up for an additional $3.75 per person per day, and we will actually not only write your reservation down on one of those note cards, but we will put it in the computer as well! Start enjoying your dining experience now with the ON TIME MY TIME DINING PACKAGE!!

 

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ADOPT A POOL CHAIR PROGRAM $7.95/day

"we have all been there, you get yourself all ready, somehow after three days of eating you have managed to not look half bad in your new swimsuit. wait ten minutes for an elevator (heaven forbid we take the stairs) get all the way to the pool deck to find row after row of abandoned chairs, left lonely soaking in the sun with someones towel or t-shirt on them. How sad.... Now you can help put an end to the loneliness and suffering of these pool chairs. for $7.95 per day you can adopt one of these pool chairs for the entire cruise.YIPPIEEE think of how special that chair will feel knowing that someone loves them and will be coming back to them, not just selfishly putting a towel on one thinking in a few hours you might check in on it. Along with your chair you will also get a limited edition Royal Caribbean plastic key chain with the words "I saved a chair today" printed on it. What could be more special?

 

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ONE ON ONE MEETING WITH THE PASTRY CHEF (Priceless)

Still confused why after all these years RCCL cant come up with one

dessert that doesn't taste like cardboard? Always wondered why the only good dessert (the carrot cake) is only served one night on the cruise and not available anywhere else?) Ever wondered why they hide the yogurt machines in the corners of the pool deck and yet you could get enough hamburgers and hot dogs to feed a small country? Well guess what? Here is your chance... For a limited time and for a select few guests, you can actually meet this elusive pastry chef in person and tell him exactly what you think :) $$$$$ Priceless

 

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THE PUT THE PERSON IN TIME OUT FOR NOT WASHING THEIR HANDS WHEN THEY WALK OUT OF THE BATHROOM PKG

We have all seen it. Someone that uses that bathroom and and then simply walks out into the masses to eat, and touch whatever they want with their sewage covered hands!!! Now you have a chance to right the wrong. for $57.50 for the entire cruise, a security officer on RCCL will deputize you and give you the power to pull up to 3 passengers aside per day, and fit them with a special hat alerting other cruisers of their sanitary infraction. Oh how the germ a phoebe will rejoice in knowing exactly who to avoid to maintain a healthy cruise. ahhhhhhhh.

 

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ok, your turn......

Ok, your turn.

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DUMP THE DIAMONDS PACKAGE $299.95 (Quantum Class Only)

 

Tired of hearing about the Diamond/Diamond+ C&A status of some of your fellow guests every other sentence? With this package we will round a bunch of them up with enticement of doubling their free drink coupons and route them to the North Star. We will then send them up and out over the edge of the ship and when you are ready ... hit the button and the floor will drop out and send those Diamonds into the sea. (Don't worry, due to maritime regulations we will send out a lifeboat to gather them up and bring them back on board) For an extra fee we will let you yell "Asta La Vista Mofos" into a microphone and broadcast that to the North Star as the floor drops. Due to heavy demand, please reserve as early as possible.

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DUMP THE DIAMONDS PACKAGE $299.95 (Quantum Class Only)

 

Tired of hearing about the Diamond/Diamond+ C&A status of some of your fellow guests every other sentence? With this package we will round a bunch of them up with enticement of doubling their free drink coupons and route them to the North Star. We will then send them up and out over the edge of the ship and when you are ready ... hit the button and the floor will drop out and send those Diamonds into the sea. (Don't worry, due to maritime regulations we will send out a lifeboat to gather them up and bring them back on board) For an extra fee we will let you yell "Asta La Vista Mofos" into a microphone and broadcast that to the North Star as the floor drops. Due to heavy demand, please reserve as early as possible.

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Interesting... (and the thread takes an evil turn)

so my question would be.... do you get to board the life boat in order of your c/a status? or is it every passenger for themselves? LOL

 

PS, NOT all diamonds are bad, some just need a little more polishing than others :)

Edited by TheTruthCanHurt
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Interesting... (and the thread takes an evil turn)

so my question would be.... do you get to board the life boat in order of your c/a status? or is it every passenger for themselves? LOL

 

PS, NOT all diamonds are bad, some just need a little more polishing than others :)

 

Well of course the Diamond pluses get fished out of the water before the "regular" Diamonds. :)

 

Just a joke people.

 

Laugh and enjoy. :)

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SO YOU WANT TO BOARD THE SHIP BEFORE DINNER PACKAGE $49.95

"Tired of the traffic jam at the port? Tired of waiting outside the door to a newly remodeled terminal because there are too many people inside? In a hurry to get on the ship and and wait in line somewhere else? RCCL proudly introduces the "sail on through" pass. For the low price of $49.95 per person (from the age of 12months and up) . you can skip all the lines and go straight to the only elevator in the port to take you right up (secretly past the salivating group of commission based photographers and straight up to the ship.) Offer available for a limited time only.

 

In order to more directly compete with Carnival this package should be called Faster to the Windjammer

 

ONE ON ONE MEETING WITH THE PASTRY CHEF (Priceless)

Still confused why after all these years RCCL cant come up with one

dessert that doesn't taste like cardboard?

I'd be interested in purchasing this package. On our last cruise I only ordered dessert one night.

Sir, your choices this evening are cardboard or styrofoam.

Uhh... I'll just have a cup of coffee.

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DUMP THE DIAMONDS PACKAGE $299.95 (Quantum Class Only)

 

Tired of hearing about the Diamond/Diamond+ C&A status of some of your fellow guests every other sentence? With this package we will round a bunch of them up with enticement of doubling their free drink coupons and route them to the North Star. We will then send them up and out over the edge of the ship and when you are ready ... hit the button and the floor will drop out and send those Diamonds into the sea. (Don't worry, due to maritime regulations we will send out a lifeboat to gather them up and bring them back on board) For an extra fee we will let you yell "Asta La Vista Mofos" into a microphone and broadcast that to the North Star as the floor drops. Due to heavy demand, please reserve as early as possible.

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Hilarious! Really enjoy your sense of humor.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

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*****************************************

DUMP THE DIAMONDS PACKAGE $299.95 (Quantum Class Only)

 

Tired of hearing about the Diamond/Diamond+ C&A status of some of your fellow guests every other sentence? With this package we will round a bunch of them up with enticement of doubling their free drink coupons and route them to the North Star. We will then send them up and out over the edge of the ship and when you are ready ... hit the button and the floor will drop out and send those Diamonds into the sea. (Don't worry, due to maritime regulations we will send out a lifeboat to gather them up and bring them back on board) For an extra fee we will let you yell "Asta La Vista Mofos" into a microphone and broadcast that to the North Star as the floor drops. Due to heavy demand, please reserve as early as possible.

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I'll take 2 to go please!!!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Here's one I was thinking about

 

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The Eat Your Way Through The Buffet Package 19.95/ day (quarantine included)

Do you love the buffet? Cant wait until you sit down to eat? Are you part of the select group that eats food off of your plate with your fingers while grazing the buffet and then touches every single serving utensil? GUESS WHAT. The Eat Your Way Through The Buffet Package has been designed exclusively for you.

In the back corner of the buffet is a special line for you and all your friends.now you can lick your fingers, touch your plate, go ahead touch everything! you can have this special all access line for 19.95 per day . And wait there's more. When you and your friends get sick... you now can (for a limited time) get the Quarantined to your room package for free. Don't wait until you are on board. This offer is available to a limited number of bad mannered people, so sign up today

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DUMP THE DIAMONDS PACKAGE $299.95 (Quantum Class Only)

 

 

Glad I'm not the only one that this annoys! Honestly it's one of the reasons I don't cruise RCCL very often anymore. Felt like a second class citizen!

We do have a nice status with another line and I really enjoy the perks, just don't flaunt it to everyone that I run into nor mention it in every post!

Edited by WendyVF
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