DH doesn't want to "dress up" for formal night

[Jane110]

Of course the cruise lines have a vested interest in encouraging the continuance of formal night...more pictures for them to sell.

 

That's a valid thought. However, the other thought is how much will they save by not having the pressure of the formal night free champagne at the Captains Party and lobster dinners?

 

Which saves them more money or makes them more money?

 

Jane

[CDRMark]

I have to think that the impression "You don't have to have a tux/ball gown to cruise" opens up the demographics and sells more fares.

 

Cheers

MarkB

(closet clothes horse)

[MrPete]

Curious about what DH wore on formal night, now that you're back.

[Silvery Seas Cruiser]

Just an observation...this topic has come up regularly on this board. I refer to women who say their husbands or boyfriends don't want to dress for formal night. Yet I have NEVER seen a message here from a man stating that his wife or girlfriend did not want to wear formal attire on formal night. That is just a fact I find interesting. I don't know what it says about human nature other than women are more inclined to want to dress up, but many men are not so inclined. Perhaps they see tuxes or dark suits with ties too stuffy or uncomfortable. I just don't know.

[CDRMark]

Just an observation...this topic has come up regularly on this board. I refer to women who say their husbands or boyfriends don't want to dress for formal night. Yet I have NEVER seen a message here from a man stating that his wife or girlfriend did not want to wear formal attire on formal night. That is just a fact I find interesting. I don't know what it says about human nature other than women are more inclined to want to dress up, but many men are not so inclined. Perhaps they see tuxes or dark suits with ties too stuffy or uncomfortable. I just don't know.

Just a guess, but perhaps those women so inclined do not frequent this board.:)

Cheers

MarkB

[Happy ks]

You do "see" them from time to time, but most women love to dress up occasionally.

 

As much as I love clothes, fashion and dressing nicely, I could do without the formal nights. Give me all semi-formal, or country club casual and I would be happy.

[MrsMoose2001]

I don't cruise, only had the one, but I was in complete agreement with DH as to not doing any dress up for an Alaskan cruise.

 

I'm one of those women who doesn't enjoy formal wear. I got it out of my system when I was in my 20's and early 30's and that is enough for me.

 

This is not about cruising, no flames please, it's about my way of thinking in general and has nothing to do with "cruise formal attire" I'm strictly speaking about life and why I don't enjoy "formal attire as a woman in general".

 

I really turn down all invites to "formal attire required" in real life.

 

I will explain my way of thinking. I enjoy good quality clothing. I love cashmere sweaters, nice shoes and handbags.

 

If I have to buy a formal gown which would cost me $$$$$ for one night or even two nights and I would not get to wear it again, it would bother me to no end as to what kind of desinger bag/shoe I could have bought, I could have bought a cashmere sweater maybe or even two.

 

Add the cost of the accessories, shoes, wrap, bag, etc etc, and it adds up for me that I could probably buy a piece of jewelry or article of clothing that I would enjoy more, get more use out of and just overall have more pleasure personally. Even spend it at a fine dining establishment with a vintage bottle of wine would make me happier, beluga caviar would make me happier.

 

I love to go to nice restaurants, but most of the formal dinners, the food is not that great (from past experience). I like to get a little dressed up, nice pants, nice evening sweater, or blouse, but that's about it for me. For me the place I go to is more important sometimes than what I wear, meaning, given the choice to dine in my favorite restaurant in what would be considered CCC or evening casual or go to a formal dinner all dressed up, I'd chose the fav restaurant hands down.

 

I also would not want to pressure DH into it. Honestly, he is a wonderful husband, and if he doesn't enjoy the tux, why force him to wear one.

 

This isn't a bragging or anything. DH has to have all his suits made as he is 6'4 and they don't sell his size here. He is not fat, not skinny but they just don't carry his size. If I count that plus his accessories, plus my cost of a gown the appropriate shoes bag and other stuff, that I would be happy with, I could most likely pay for a ski holiday for 4 days that we would both enjoy a lot more than the rubber chicken dinner for 3 hours that we would have at our formal invites here in town not to mention the cost of the tickets. I rather send a check for the charity fundraiser and spend the money on individual things that will last longer and/or give us more pleasure. Tickets alone could run upwards of $500 for two sometimes $1000 depending on the charity.

 

For travel, even in NYC I never go anywhere where an evening sweater/blouse and nice black slacks are not appropriate and a suit for hubby.

 

There are some of us ladies in life who don't enjoy the "formal" but love nice clothing, even designer clothes, I'm not flaming or anyting, sorry if this doesn't come out right, I'm just trying to explain the difference.

 

I personally don't think that a love of fashion and clothing has anything to do with "dressing up formal", and I think a lot of ladies here who have excellent taste, and love to dress nicely may not enjoy the dressing up but still might like to talk about it, hear about it, like myself, I can appreciate it when someone else does it and enjoys it and I like looking at pictures of it, but it's not for me to do. I hope this explains it with out it coming out badly. Again I'm not flaming or anything, or judging or criticizing, this is just my opinion for myself.

[Silvery Seas Cruiser]

Mrs. Moose, you'll get absolutely no argument from me. I'm in your camp.

[mrsred]

I also would not want to pressure DH into it. Honestly, he is a wonderful husband, and if he doesn't enjoy the tux, why force him to wear one.

 

I agree.

 

~e

[johnql]

Yet I have NEVER seen a message here from a man stating that his wife or girlfriend did not want to wear formal attire on formal night. That is just a fact I find interesting. I don't know what it says about human nature other than women are more inclined to want to dress up, but many men are not so inclined. Perhaps they see tuxes or dark suits with ties too stuffy or uncomfortable. I just don't know.

My traveling companion - a woman, but not my girlfriend - does NOT enjoy dressing up. So there you have it - a first. Because of that, we have settled on NCL as our favorite cruiseline because if we cruised on a traditional line, we would observe the suggested dress guideline. This way, we don't have to worry about it at all.

 

P.S. I do agree with your general contention that men are less inclined to enjoy dressing up while on vacation. It may have to do with the business attire that many men have to contend with. Once they're off work, they don't want to even think about dressing up (generally speaking).

[seagulls]

There is no need to pack a ball gown or tuxedo for formal night when cruising. A dark suit, or even a navyblue blazer is all that is required. As for the ladies a little black dress would fit the bill nicely. These are items that are in every closet, don't we all go to weddings and funerals, etc? The reason the cruise lines set dress codes is because if they don't, give some people an inch and they will take a yard.

 

I can see that there are less and less fancy evening dresses and more simple evening pants and elegent tops being worn. And I just have to mention that the sooner those shedding glitter frocks and tops lose favor the happier I will be. There was glitter dust everywhere on the Celebrity theater seats just waiting for the next unsuspecting person to sit down and have their outfit ruined.

[MrsMoose2001]

Lol Seagulls, actually, I have to be honest, for hubby the attire you describe would be no problem he has the suits, and the blazers and sport jackets.

 

For me, I must say, I no little black dress. I own no dresses, well I own one, it would still be in style and it is beautiful black clocktail dress but it's not my size and hasn't been for a long time. I keep it as a souvenier as it was very expensive and a gift from my mom and I just can't part with it.

I own maybe 4 casual summer skirts. I don't go to weddings, as it seems everyone I know is either already married or not getting married. For a funeral, not everyone here wears black and if I require black, then black pants and top/jacket would have to do.

 

I'm not arguing the point about dressing up. I do believe each of us as individuals has our own personal style that we try to incorporate into the current fashion (please correct me if I'm wrong). I also think that some people love to dress up and some don't. I think all the ladies and gents who come to this particular board, want to look nice and fashionable and proper and one thing I've learned, it's also about where we live and our personal lifestyles and way of thinking.

 

For the gents out there, I respect those who don't mind, and actually enjoy the wearing of the tux. My hubby's dad certainly didn't mind and I think he enjoyed it. I also respect those gents who don't like it for whatever reason they may have. Same for the ladies, my hubby's mom, loved the full blown formal attire big time.

 

I've learned a lot from this board about what matters, and I think, it's the spirit of the way people dress. I think it's about makeing an effort to look nice and proper and that in the end if everyone made a small effort, everyone would bascially be happy. Please if I'm wrong please correct me.

[depwife]

We are cruising in December on RCI Legend OTS. We do plan on dressing for formal nights (we think they're great fun!).

 

My quesiton is re: my father. This is his 1st cruise. He is 61 years old and the only suit he owns is grey, and not dark grey either. Do you all think it'd be appropriate for him to wear that on formal night? It's his multi-purpose suit. He wore it to a funeral on a Tuesday and to a wedding the following Saturday. :)

 

Thanks in advance!

[OTRlady]

My quesiton is re: my father. This is his 1st cruise. He is 61 years old and the only suit he owns is grey, and not dark grey either. Do you all think it'd be appropriate for him to wear that on formal night? It's his multi-purpose suit. He wore it to a funeral on a Tuesday and to a wedding the following Saturday. :)

 

Put in my two cents long ago, but here it is again. Who says dark colors are the only colors a formal outfit can be? Last time I checked, white was the color of choice for bridal gowns. There are plenty of men who wear white dinner jackets as well. My sister and brother-in-law had all the men dressed in light grey tuxes for their wedding. If your father's multi-purpose suit is light grey, then I say that's fine.

 

Count yourself lucky. My DH refuses to wear the coat and tie at all. HIS idea of formal is a white shirt (short-sleeved) with dark pants. He also refuses to wear long sleeves. If that excludes him from the Captains' cocktail party, so be it; he doesn't go. At least you will have your family around you at the party and in the pictures--even if your father's suit IS light grey.

 

Go, have fun. Forget about the color of the suit.

[1drifter]

I agree about the light grey suit. My husband's suit is grey--about Charcoal color but not really dark. He wasn't going to buy a new suit, just to be a few shades darker and we're really happy he didn't. He ended up being the most "dressed up" of all the men at our table on 2 different cruises. You see a lot of things on a cruise, everyone has their own personality and style. Go and enjoy and do not worry about the light grey suit!

[lclocke]

FAMILYMIRACLE, that was not the case in April when we sailed, when there were several people, women and children included, who wre no where near dressed for formal nite....We were seated near the door, so we saw all of the fashion do's and don'ts.

Hubby bought a tux for our first cruise and has worn it since then to formal nites, wedding and our class reunion. And he is a fox in it. For the men here, trust me, there is nothing like a man in a tux to rev a woman's engine. Think James Bond.:eek:

[depwife]

I agree about the light grey suit. My husband's suit is grey--about Charcoal color but not really dark. He wasn't going to buy a new suit, just to be a few shades darker and we're really happy he didn't. He ended up being the most "dressed up" of all the men at our table on 2 different cruises. You see a lot of things on a cruise, everyone has their own personality and style. Go and enjoy and do not worry about the light grey suit!

 

Thanks to those who responded! I agree with you 100% but told mom I would check with the experts. ;)

 

Mom gave in and is renting a tux for dad. My DH will be in a tux and she didn't want dad to look under-dressed compared to DH. It has gotten them a little more excited about the cruise, so whatever "floats their boat"! :)

 

Thanks again!!!!