Major delima I need help

[usnavywife]

I just spoke with the inlaws.

Dhs aunt has cancer we found out about 6 weeks ago.

Has started radiation and Chemo. Not doing well at all. Hospitalized, feeding tube the hole nine yards. It doesn't look promising. And FIL is affraid MIL won't go on the cruise if she is in bad shape or dead.

So what are their options? No they did not get the travel insurance, Cause I asked if they wanted to get it and how much extra it was.

TIA

Oh and we leave on the 13th

[Toto2Kansas]

Gosh, that is terrible, so sorry to hear about it.

 

Not much they can do without insurance, the cruise line will be of no help on this one. If you leave on the 13th of this month, even cancelling now will not get them back much of their actual money. And at least one of the original passengers booked must be in that cabin, in other words, you can't transfer the entire cabin to another couple.

 

Hope all works out well and they are able to go. Very sad! :(

[usnavywife]

OK thanks that is what I told dh, that FIL might as well still go and find someone else to go. Do they charge for that?

[Crown Prince]

Navy Wife:

Yes, the charge is $50 for a name change.

I agree. Please encourage Dad to cruise. I'm sure your Mum will agree. I'll say a little prayer for all of you. ;)

[Toto2Kansas]

Yes, this close to sailing, there is a fee for a name change, but remember, don't wait too long. If you call Princess tomorrow, they can give you the exact price and how to take care of this (or your TA if you booked with one). I think this all has to be taken care of something like 3 days (not exactly sure of the time frame here) before the sailing, maybe more, because of the new security rules.

 

Again, real sorry to hear about the health problems in the family.

And best of luck, I hope you find a way for him to join you.

[usnavywife]

OK thanks.

I have no way of speaking with FIL until tomorrow evening. And have no clue who he would get to go with him.

I will call though to Princess tomorrow and see what the exact days are.

 

I just wish they would call and tell us stuff, we have to wait until we call them to find out anything:( And then we are supposed to drop things at the drop of a hat and go home for things like this:mad:

Ok done with my vent.

And thanks for the prayers

[cadburysmom]

Prayers going out to your family.

[spongerob]

It's a very sad situation. Your FIL could of course just go by himself. He'd still end up paying both fares. Or, he could cancel and get something back, if that is possible at this late date. It's a tough decision either way.

[usnavywife]

Thanks Guys!

Calling Princess here in a few.

The bad thing is MIL is the one who wanted to go so we (dh and I) had to convince FIL that he had to come. We finally got him with the 24/7 buffet lol.

I think he is still intending to go but who knows at this point they noone tells us much of anything.

I did find out though that Aunt is planning to stop treatments and the Drs told her they have one chance to get it cause it is so spread and so aggressive. So again who knows.

Thanks again for the prayers.

[Desert Cruizers]

Thanks Guys!

Calling Princess here in a few.

The bad thing is MIL is the one who wanted to go so we (dh and I) had to convince FIL that he had to come. We finally got him with the 24/7 buffet lol.

I think he is still intending to go but who knows at this point they noone tells us much of anything.

I did find out though that Aunt is planning to stop treatments and the Drs told her they have one chance to get it cause it is so spread and so aggressive. So again who knows.

Thanks again for the prayers.

I am truely sorry to hear of your sad news. On a upcoming Cruise of ours, a couple had to change their plans, and offered their room to one of the other members of our Roll Call, not sure of the process, but one of the couples picked up their room. My Prayers are with the family.

[usnavywife]

Thanks for the tips.

I called Princess. There isn't anything they can do. If they cancel now then they only get the gov fees back. Which isn't much at all.

Oh FIL can go and then change the MILs to someone else but no clue who could go this short of notice.

Thanks again

[M&MCruisin]

USNAVYWIFE...My heart was broken for you and your family when I read your thread.

 

I would say, if MIL needs FIL at home, he should stay to be a support to her. MIL losing a sister (did I get that right) is an awful thing and she may need him. Even if the aunt makes it, MIL still may need his support. Would he be able to have a good time anyway if he knows his wife is so upset at home? I say who cares about the money, their marriage is more important.

 

With that being said, If MIL really pushes him to go and enjoy himself; then I say no harm, but I cant imagine losing my sister and my husband being on a cruise. How does your dh feel about it all? Is he doing ok? Was he close to his aunt? I am truely sorry for you all.

[usnavywife]

M&M

I honestly have no clue if FIL is planning to go still. THey haven't packed they haven't done anything. But I will say this MIL is very tight with the money so she may still go cause they would be loosing out on so much money. Or she may insist on FIL atleast going so that they can get a little bit out of the money already spent KWIM?

Yes it is the Aunt on the Maternal side, but it is a strange situation lol you would think we were from WVA or something (No offense to you W Va folks) But dhs aunt (the sick one) is his moms sister, her husband dhs uncle is FILs brother:eek: lol. Like I said complicated.

Dh "used" to be close to the cousins, and would spend nights there etc... as dh is an only child so he and the cousin are like Brothers as they are only 13 months apart.

But when dh joined the Navy almost 13 years ago he basically became the red headed step child, and certainly became one after we got married and he didn't get out and "come home":rolleyes:

So there is very little communication with the family and us. We have to make the attempts always. No birthday cards, no christmas cards, no phone calls etc.... from the family.

Until last night we had not spoken to mil and fil in 6 weeks when dh called about the cruise. That is when MIL told us about Aunt. And then I called last night and the MIL pretty much can't stand me lol (we tolerate each other but that is it) cause I took her son away:rolleyes: from her.

 

So at this point in our lives NO dh isn't close to this Aunt had it been 10 years ago maybe. But like I said when he joined it all changed, cause that family just didn't join the military, period. And you certainly didn't move away and try to make a better life for yourself.

As for FIL having a good time without MIL, I would say probably cause he would actually get to spend some time with his only child and his 3 grandchildren in which they only see once a year. And this was that "once a year trip".

Thanks again for the prayers and thoughts.

It is tough for us cause we will be deemed the a$$holes because we are still going on the cruise no matter what. My dh more than likely will be in Iraq next year this time and we try to enjoy as much family time together as we can. So we will be the talk. And if she makes it until we get back dh may go home if the command "allows" it (She wouldnt' be immediate family) so that is iffy. I am willing to go home with the kids and dh but we would have to drive cause we can't afford to fly 5 people back cause tickets on a good day are atleast 350 and with short notice it would probably 450-500 if not more. That is what we get for living in a small town lol. Any way dh nor I want to drive 27 hours home but that is more fessible so who knows at this point.

Thanks again everyone

[prophotogirl]

You can still buy travel insurance. Go though another company other than Princess. I just did a quote for a cruise leaving on the 13th and got a quote. Just google travel insurance or I used TravelGuard.com. That way if they do have to cancel they have the insurance.

[Toto2Kansas]

You can still buy travel insurance. Go though another company other than Princess. I just did a quote for a cruise leaving on the 13th and got a quote. Just google travel insurance or I used TravelGuard.com. That way if they do have to cancel they have the insurance.

 

Travel insurance is great, but not great for a pre-existing condition unless you purchase it within the time constraints of the policy, which it sounds like is happening here for her aunt. It would do no good to purchase the insurance now without the pre-existing condition clause available. It would be just a waste of the passengers money if they decide they need to cancel because of a pre-existing condition the aunt had.

[usnavywife]

Thanks I will suggest that they look into it. But I would think since we purchased and paid in full in Jan that they wouldn't offer it. We will see.

Thanks again

[morriscats]

Maybe I am not following this correctly but MIL does not like you and resents you for taking away her son? Little contact with them? No Christmas or birthday presents? Little contact with the grandchildren? Why are you going on this cruise with them? I hope you, your DH and your children can go, have a great time and prepare for the possible absence of your DH to Iraq. It is hard to lose a family member but it sounds as if there is nothing more you can do. Your inlaws will do what they need to do. Don't worry what is said about you regarding your decision.

[usnavywife]

The only reason they are going on the cruise is cause the MIL and FIL are teh only 2 of the family that do have contact with us. They always come the week of the 4th and we had the cruise planned so that I wouldn't have baby sit them for the week while dh works cause he wouldn't get leave that close together especially considering it is a holiday week. So I suggested to dh that we invite them and surprisingly they agreed, like I said earlier I believe FIL didn't really want to go but DH and I convinced him to go so that we don't have to baby sit MIL. I don't really mean it in a bad way it is just that dh and I think nothing of going and doing anything we want. They don't they stay pretty close to home. And we baby sat her once in Cali and I never want to do that again lol.

Anyway they agreed to go and that got them out of coming here for a week and all of us but dh stare at the same 4 walls. there is nothing left here to do (not much to begin with lol) and they won't go to SA or Houston etc... So we are "stuck" here having uncomfortable conversations and watching tv.

So I was trying to kill 2 birds with one stone lol and I think it is back firing lol. But then again that is our luck. BTW it isn't just the Inlaws going so is my mother and we honestly didn't expect anyone of them to go in the first place, but thought it would be a good opportunity if they did KWIM?

Maybe I am not following this correctly but MIL does not like you and resents you for taking away her son? Little contact with them? No Christmas or birthday presents? Little contact with the grandchildren? Why are you going on this cruise with them? I hope you, your DH and your children can go, have a great time and prepare for the possible absence of your DH to Iraq. It is hard to lose a family member but it sounds as if there is nothing more you can do. Your inlaws will do what they need to do. Don't worry what is said about you regarding your decision.

[Pam in CA]

I'm sorry you're going through this. It sounds like a no-win situation emotionally and whether you go or not, there will continue to be the family dynamics. We all make choices in life, some good and some bad; it's what we do with them that makes us who we are. I hope your FIL and MIL do go on the cruise and you have a family vacation that is special for all of you.

[mycruz]

This really isn't good news to hear.

 

Have you considered having your MIL and FIL change dates. Not sure how this works with Princess, you aren't cancelling, just modifying the dates. I'm sure that the MIL would want to get away after all of this is over. If Princess would change to another sailing say 6 months from now, perhaps they would be ok with that.

[prophotogirl]

Travel insurance is great, but not great for a pre-existing condition unless you purchase it within the time constraints of the policy, which it sounds like is happening here for her aunt. It would do no good to purchase the insurance now without the pre-existing condition clause available. It would be just a waste of the passengers money if they decide they need to cancel because of a pre-existing condition the aunt had.

But does the insurance company need to know about a non cruiser's pre-existing condition. For all they (the insurance company) knows, everything thing is fine on the home front and the cruisers had either forgotten to purchase the insurance until now (heaven forbid) something where to happen before or during the cruise the insured is covered. I doubt that the insurance will want copies of the Aunt's (the non cruiser) medical records but only a copy of well, the ___ _____.

[Lynda90]

The documentation that must be provided to the insurance company will include that information. A physician will have to fill out and sign the form. I'm sure most physicians will not go along with fraud.

[usnavywife]

Thanks for all of the tips and suggestions.

I called Princess and asked what their options were and the only thing they can do because we are within 2 weeks of the cruise is they can get their port fees back that is it. Or MIL not going and them getting someone else to cruise.

 

But I spoke with MIL a bit a go and she doesn't think it is as serious as FIL makes it out, (because she is in denial I think, atleast she sounds that way) But her words to me were, "well we didn't buy the insurance, so yeah we are still going" so I guess we will wait and see. They have convinced her to continue the treatments. So wish us luck and keep them in your prayers please.

thanks again for all of the suggestions, tips, and prayers etc...

They are greatly appreciated!

[Umbarger]

You can still buy travel insurance. Go though another company other than Princess. I just did a quote for a cruise leaving on the 13th and got a quote. Just google travel insurance or I used TravelGuard.com. That way if they do have to cancel they have the insurance.

 

Would'nt this be insurance fraud?

[giustot]

Prophotogirl, what you're suggesting is insurance fraud. People go to jail for that. Tom.