swingers will be on our family cruise

[crusinmama06]

Ewwww I feel bad for people booking the garden villas the following week :eek: I hope they disinfect that pool...lol.

 

I see on the other thread that the OP decided to keep this cruise. So I hope to see a good report when she gets back. :D

[Preds]

Ewwww I feel bad for people booking the garden villas the following week :eek: I hope they disinfect that pool...lol.

 

I see on the other thread that the OP decided to keep this cruise. So I hope to see a good report when she gets back. :D

LOL, I can agree with you there! I hope they do a really good job disinfecting the Villa itself as well!

[LifestylersOnTheSea]

Wow. Is this the board where I've seen a bunch of people angry about 'kid haters'? Funny how it's okay to denounce an entire group of other people though.

 

To the person who thought swingers must not respect themselves or others, you have no idea what you are talking about. Not only do we respect ourselves, but we are completely open and honest with our partners, unlike most of the liars, cheaters, and secret keepers we meet in our 'straight lives'.

 

For those who think a suite would have to be 'disinfected' after a group of swingers has been socializing in it, you also have no idea what you're talking about. Do you really think people are going to spend a week exchanging fluids in a hot tub that will have the same water in it all week? Yuck. At every lifestyle party I have ever attended that has a hot tub, there has been a rule about sexual activity in the hot tub, for a good reason. I would expect that same rule in this situation.

 

For those who think swingers would engage in lewd behaviour in public areas, again, you have no idea what you're talking about. Swingers tend to be married/committed professionals, many of whom have children. As I noted on the Norwegian board, when friends ask us about the lifestyle parties we attend, we tell them that they are just like 'regular' parties, only people are more respectful. I've had all kinds of things happen in bars and at dances like being grabbed or groped, not to mention some of the things I've heard people say, but that doesn't happen with lifestylers because they have rules regarding respect and behavior.

 

I'm really sorry to see how negative people have been about a lifestyle they obviously know nothing about. I would trust my children with swingers in a heartbeat... a priest on the other hand I might think twice about. That is a joke, but if you think about it, priests have had more bad press than swingers, haven't they? Does that mean I get to assume that a group of priests on a cruise would be a danger to children? Think about it.

[CanadianTwosome]

On our cruise on the Star in January, there was a Bed and Breakfast convention. From the website I saw, there were a LOT of Bed and Breakfast owners on the cruise, and I made a point of looking for some sign of a large group and I saw nothing noticable.

 

I think Preds is probably the best reference anyone has for what to expect. They were on the same ship with the same group and didn't notice them.

 

I do agree with something Lifestylers said, also; this is the board where we complain about people who write nasty posts about kids or have bad attitudes towards 'all kids' without giving them an opportunity to behave well. I'm sorry to see that so many here seem to have that same bad attitude about a group of people whose only difference is having made a PRIVATE lifestyle choice.

 

I may be paranoid, but I'm wary of ALL adults around my child. Just a couple of hours ago, I was with my daughter in a store and she wanted to sit on a garden swing. I was in a hurry and kept walking, saying over my shoulder, 'I hope you have cab fare...' I got around the corner and stopped and waited, and when she didn't immediately follow, my first thought was of the man who had been in the same aisle looking at something, and whether he might have offered her a ride. It sounds ridiculous, but it could happen. In fact, it happens all the time, which is why I was happy when my daughter came up from behind me and said 'boo' just as I was about to go back for her.

 

The bottom line for me is that I don't care who is on my cruise with me and my family. If someone behaves inappropriately, I'll deal with it, but I don't assume people will just because they have different interests than I do.

[crusinmama06]

I'm sorry to see that so many here seem to have that same bad attitude about a group of people whose only difference is having made a PRIVATE lifestyle choice.

 

PRIVATE is the important word though. The "PRIVATE Garden Villas" are available for this cruise. I just checked and 1400 and 1450 are available.

 

So where would this group have their "private" hot tub and sunbathing deck?

[CanadianTwosome]

PRIVATE is the important word though. The "PRIVATE Garden Villas" are available for this cruise. I just checked and 1400 and 1450 are available.

 

So where would this group have their "private" hot tub and sunbathing deck?

 

Perhaps they're waiting and hoping for the price to go down. I'll bet those cabins don't sell out quite as quickly as others. The only places there are private hot tubs are in those villas, though, so if they don't book one, they won't have one, it's as simple as that. What do you think they'll do then? I think probably the ones that feel like going in a hot tub will put on their swimsuits and hang out just like the other passengers. The point about private is that what people do behind closed doors is nobody's business but theirs. A lack of understanding of other peoples' choices doesn't give us the right to assume they will behave badly in public. How do you feel when someone tells you that your children WILL be disruptive in a dining room, or WILL be a problem in general? At least when people make assumptions about kids they usually have some bad experience to explain why they feel that way. I'm guessing nobody on this board making assumptions and negative remarks about swingers actually knows any personally. The only posters I've seen with real experience with swingers are Preds and Lifestylers, and both are saying the same thing - they will not bother anyone. I choose to believe them.

[lovesublime]

PRIVATE is the important word though. The "PRIVATE Garden Villas" are available for this cruise. I just checked and 1400 and 1450 are available.

 

So where would this group have their "private" hot tub and sunbathing

deck?

 

Not the owner's suites either. I checked too. You would think that at least one was already booked as this seems to be an organized group cruise.

[LifestylersOnTheSea]

Well it sure is a good thing people are taking such a keen interest. If the host just watches these threads, they'll know how long they can put off booking and still get a villa. We often book last minute trips and every single time we've looked into cruises last minute, the most expensive categories have had vacancies, not to mention big discounts.

 

Do people do this kind of research for all groups they hear about on cruises? Would you be this interested in a cruise you're not even going on if it were a group of clog dancers? Imagine how annoying they might be, clogging all over the ship!

 

I have a great idea. Go to the website that Cruisinmama found and email the host and ask him. If you are truly interested in what is happening with the group and why they haven't booked a villa yet, he is the man to talk to, not this board. I have had the pleasure of corresponding with him because we had wanted to go on this cruise but unfortunately the dates didn't work for us. He is very nice and I expect he will be happy to answer any questions you may have for him, as long as you are polite. If you're rude or nasty, he will likely ignore you as I would. I hope I haven't offended you by thinking I had to remind you to be polite. Don't you hate it when people just assume the worst of you without knowing anything about you?

[CarolynB]

Well it sure is a good thing people are taking such a keen interest. If the host just watches these threads, they'll know how long they can put off booking and still get a villa. We often book last minute trips and every single time we've looked into cruises last minute, the most expensive categories have had vacancies, not to mention big discounts.

 

Do people do this kind of research for all groups they hear about on cruises? Would you be this interested in a cruise you're not even going on if it were a group of clog dancers? Imagine how annoying they might be, clogging all over the ship!

 

I have a great idea. Go to the website that Cruisinmama found and email the host and ask him. If you are truly interested in what is happening with the group and why they haven't booked a villa yet, he is the man to talk to, not this board. I have had the pleasure of corresponding with him because we had wanted to go on this cruise but unfortunately the dates didn't work for us. He is very nice and I expect he will be happy to answer any questions you may have for him, as long as you are polite. If you're rude or nasty, he will likely ignore you as I would. I hope I haven't offended you by thinking I had to remind you to be polite. Don't you hate it when people just assume the worst of you without knowing anything about you?

Thank you for the great posts! My family will be taking this cruise if the good Lord is willing. It will not because of the group that will be on the ship. This is only one group, there maybe others. It is just the one that I found out about. Heck, we are trying to make this cruise of ours a group cruise too! I just don't think if I posted it as a Birthday Bash it would alarm anyone.

 

This morning before I posted my first thread, I did email Mitchsparty and asked how many were expected on this cruise and what could we expect with having children along, and I was polite. I have not had a response yet, maybe I won't. With the responses I have gotten from you, I really don't think I need to. I also emailed my TA and asked him to call NCL and ask questions.

 

So thanks again Lifestylers for the posts.;)

[LifestylersOnTheSea]

Thank you for the great posts! My family will be taking this cruise if the good Lord is willing. It will not because of the group that will be on the ship. This is only one group, there maybe others. It is just the one that I found out about. Heck, we are trying to make this cruise of ours a group cruise too! I just don't think if I posted it as a Birthday Bash it would alarm anyone.

 

This morning before I posted my first thread, I did email Mitchsparty and asked how many were expected on this cruise and what could we expect with having children along, and I was polite. I have not had a response yet, maybe I won't. With the responses I have gotten from you, I really don't think I need to. I also emailed my TA and asked him to call NCL and ask questions.

 

So thanks again Lifestylers for the posts.;)

 

You are welcome! :) People in alternative lifestyles are just like everyone else, we've just made some different choices. I wish I could say that there are no jerks in our lifestyle, but since we're pretty much a cross section of all kinds of people, we can't avoid them either!! For the most part, though, you might be surprised to find out that people you know are in an alternative lifestyle.

 

I hope Mitch takes a moment to write back to you. I have no doubt that you were very polite. He might be quite busy at the moment, but hopefully he'll get around to it. :)

[morganboys]

you should have nothing to worry about. just becuase they are swingers doesn't mean they will want everyone they see. It doesn't work that way. Also its not like they will be having an orgy on the lido deck. Odds is you won't even know they are there.

[crusinmama06]

Do people do this kind of research for all groups they hear about on cruises? Would you be this interested in a cruise you're not even going on if it were a group of clog dancers? Imagine how annoying they might be, clogging all over the ship!

 

Yes, we do when people come here and specifically ask for help and our opinions. It's called a public message board. That's what we do here. We discuss our opinions.

 

Have you ever seen a post about the Bears taking over a cruise? Whole areas are shut down and not available to the other passengers (like the adult pools).

 

Did you read about the Nickelodean cruise having slime at the Freedom H20 zone? I wouldn't touch that cruise if you paid me. I won't be on that cruise but when the questions came up I tried my best to find all of the info I could for those that were going to be on it.

 

I don't think I have ever remember seeing clog dancers shut down the adult pool or H20 zone. So if I am going on a cruise, paying to use the adult pool/H20 zone, but they get shut down for a private group, then yes I would be angry.

 

Not once did I say I "hated" swingers. I could care less who you choose to have sex with. The question revolved around which public areas would be closed off for this group. And since the group leader is advertising certain areas to be available to his group...but when you search the private areas (like the garden villas) and they are still available, then you have to wonder what public areas will be taken.

 

The OP has already made her decision. So there is no need to keep rehashing the same arguments.

 

I just find it ironic that you joined CC last November but only have 6 posts. And they are all on this thread and the other thread. Yet you have a keen knowledge of what we talk about around here. Which leads me to believe that you more than likely have another screen name that you use most of the time. Why hide behind another screen name?

 

If I am wrong and wayyy off base, then I apologize. You could seriously just read the boards and never post, I understand that. But I see people carrying two screen names all of the time. And they bring out the alternate screen name when there are controversial threads. So I get leery when I see it. But like I said, I apologize if this isn't the case. But I have to ask. :confused:

[KerCar]

 

Do people do this kind of research for all groups they hear about on cruises? Would you be this interested in a cruise you're not even going on if it were a group of clog dancers? Imagine how annoying they might be, clogging all over the ship!

 

Yes, actually group cruise/partial charter questions come up all the time on these boards. I recently decided against booking a cruise that was partially chartered by an oldies/doo woop group, after lots of reading and research on this board. I personally would be very wary of going on ANY partial charter as these more often than none involve venues being closed off to everyone not involved in the charter.

 

To the OP: Have a wonderful trip:) Keep us posted on your responses from Mitch and NCL. If it turns out that this is a really big group something you need to keep in mind is that NCL reserves the right to cancel your booking if Mitch's group decides to charter the entire ship. This happened last year on the Dawn when Rosie O'Donnel's group decided to turn their partial charter into a full ship charter a few months before the cruise.

[KerCar]

I won't be on that cruise but when the questions came up I tried my best to find all of the info I could for those that were going to be on it.

 

You always go above and beyond to answer ALL our questions and we love you for it:D

[CarolynB]

You really should have no concerns...we actually have a lounge for private functions and everyone must sign a waiver showing that they know all ther rules and regulations of the cruiseline. I have actually sailed with these groups before, and besides alittle noise and staying up later than normal, they really keep things behind closed doors and are very well behaved. Hope this helps.

 

 

And thanks again to all that replied. I posted this on the NCL board also.

 

CarolynB

[emjsea]

To the OP: Have a wonderful trip:) Keep us posted on your responses from Mitch and NCL. If it turns out that this is a really big group something you need to keep in mind is that NCL reserves the right to cancel your booking if Mitch's group decides to charter the entire ship. This happened last year on the Dawn when Rosie O'Donnel's group decided to turn their partial charter into a full ship charter a few months before the cruise.

 

And next year Atlantis took over the the March Celebrity Solstice and people got bumped, but then Atlantis always books the entire ship over a year in advance.

 

And CruisinMama is right here. No one wants to book a cruise they are looking forward to and have entire areas taken over by groups. If I can't enjoy all the parts of the ship I paid for, I'd be a little peeved. Another problem with large groups is that when you put a large group of people together, behavior changes, sometimes for the worse. It doesn't matter the nature of the group, but they get a sense of entitlement and bravura and also tend to engage in some behavior they wouldn't if they were protected by being in a large group.

 

That's why I like Atlantis, we get the entire ship and no one bets bothered. Or any suprises. And, as a gay man, I don't find it offensive if people wouldn't want to share a ship with a large group of Bears or gay men. In fact, I think it's better that someone who would be that bothered find out ahead of time and choose to skip that cruise. That's a good way to avoid a lot of unpleasant confrontation or bad feelings on vacation. And, again, I wouldn't want to be on a "regular" cruise (If I ever do one again) with a large group of anyone taking up areas and venues. From what I've read on these boards, anytime there is an organized large group of any affinity group, the behavior tends to go downhill.

 

As long as people are polite to one another in public, it doesn't matter what our personal beliefs and prejudices (or just preferences) are. That's another difference that should exist between private and public behavior.

[LifestylersOnTheSea]

Yes, we do when people come here and specifically ask for help and our opinions. It's called a public message board. That's what we do here. We discuss our opinions.

 

Have you ever seen a post about the Bears taking over a cruise? Whole areas are shut down and not available to the other passengers (like the adult pools).

 

Did you read about the Nickelodean cruise having slime at the Freedom H20 zone? I wouldn't touch that cruise if you paid me. I won't be on that cruise but when the questions came up I tried my best to find all of the info I could for those that were going to be on it.

 

I don't think I have ever remember seeing clog dancers shut down the adult pool or H20 zone. So if I am going on a cruise, paying to use the adult pool/H20 zone, but they get shut down for a private group, then yes I would be angry.

 

Not once did I say I "hated" swingers. I could care less who you choose to have sex with. The question revolved around which public areas would be closed off for this group. And since the group leader is advertising certain areas to be available to his group...but when you search the private areas (like the garden villas) and they are still available, then you have to wonder what public areas will be taken.

 

The OP has already made her decision. So there is no need to keep rehashing the same arguments.

 

I just find it ironic that you joined CC last November but only have 6 posts. And they are all on this thread and the other thread. Yet you have a keen knowledge of what we talk about around here. Which leads me to believe that you more than likely have another screen name that you use most of the time. Why hide behind another screen name?

 

If I am wrong and wayyy off base, then I apologize. You could seriously just read the boards and never post, I understand that. But I see people carrying two screen names all of the time. And they bring out the alternate screen name when there are controversial threads. So I get leery when I see it. But like I said, I apologize if this isn't the case. But I have to ask. :confused:

 

You bring up some very good points. I thank you for explaining why you took the time to do the research. It really is easy to get defensive when people constantly jump to conclusions about something that most people don't know a lot about. I have also been in touch with the host, because we wanted to take this cruise but weren't able to, so I know for a fact that they do intend to book a villa like they did on the Alaska cruise Preds was on. So I know they wont' be booking the public areas. I also know from my own experience that there just won't be public activity that will be any different from other passengers, especially rude behavior. I don't know if there were any groups on our last cruise, but it was crowded and the only time any of us got to use the hot tubs was at night. They were full of poeple all day. I completly agree with you about groups that take over public areas and I wouldn't want to be on that cruise either. I did not understand that was your point and not the lifestyle itself, so I apologize. :)

 

I only have a few posts because when I joined I was trying to find out if there were any other lifestylers on the cruise we took a couple of months ago. I tried in the roll calls and I visited the cruise line's board to see some things, and I came here because we have kids. The only response I got on the roll call was from someone asking what I was talking about. I wouldn't have posted now except that I thought someone with real experience with the lifestyle would be able to provide information that was useful. I could understand if someone didn't want to admit they were in the lifestyle though becuase it invites speculation and attacks a lot of the time. I actually expected to have to defend myself and my choices becaue that has happened to me on other boards and is why I usually just lurk, but I thought it was worth it if I could educate anyone even a little bit. I am always interested in any show I see on tv that involves the lifestyle and so far I have been disappointed by every one. Even the ones the critics think are really well done have not shown an accurate depction of the lifestyle I have experienced. The problem is that the producers and editors are still not lifestylers themselves and so I think they show the parts that they think will generate the most income for them. Or swingers are featured in shows like CSI and they never get it right either, and usually the parts they get wrong are the parts that are most important to their story line.

 

It's a catch 22. In order for us to lead 'normal' lives and not be affected by peole's misconceptions and opinions, we have to be discreet. Being discreet means people not in the lifestyle know very little about it other than we enjoy sex. So speculation just goes rampant and people think they know all kinds of things that they really don't. The most common misconception is that swingers are wild and sex crazy, which is why someone might be worried about what they might see on a cruise that has a swing group on it. The truth is we're just regular poeple who have made a particular lifestyle choice. A lot of us are even quite boring when we're not out at a club!

[LifestylersOnTheSea]

And next year Atlantis took over the the March Celebrity Solstice and people got bumped, but then Atlantis always books the entire ship over a year in advance.

 

And CruisinMama is right here. No one wants to book a cruise they are looking forward to and have entire areas taken over by groups. If I can't enjoy all the parts of the ship I paid for, I'd be a little peeved. Another problem with large groups is that when you put a large group of people together, behavior changes, sometimes for the worse. It doesn't matter the nature of the group, but they get a sense of entitlement and bravura and also tend to engage in some behavior they wouldn't if they were protected by being in a large group.

 

That's why I like Atlantis, we get the entire ship and no one bets bothered. Or any suprises. And, as a gay man, I don't find it offensive if people wouldn't want to share a ship with a large group of Bears or gay men. In fact, I think it's better that someone who would be that bothered find out ahead of time and choose to skip that cruise. That's a good way to avoid a lot of unpleasant confrontation or bad feelings on vacation. And, again, I wouldn't want to be on a "regular" cruise (If I ever do one again) with a large group of anyone taking up areas and venues. From what I've read on these boards, anytime there is an organized large group of any affinity group, the behavior tends to go downhill.

 

As long as people are polite to one another in public, it doesn't matter what our personal beliefs and prejudices (or just preferences) are. That's another difference that should exist between private and public behavior.

 

You are right and I replied to Cruisinmama as well. I was being defensive which I'm sure you can understand. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar but it can be hard to see it when you're used to it being something else.

[CanadianTwosome]

I'm sorry, I think I misunderstood some of the posts here. I think there were two ideas being addressed - one about the potential behaviour of a group of people whose lifestyle choices we may not understand (but which our imaginations can run wild on), and one about the possibility of a big group of any nature taking over public areas in general. I missed the second one.

 

I think emjsea is absolutely correct when he says that when people are in a big group it can affect their behaviour. There can be a real 'mob mentality' thing, which in a social and often alcohol fueled environment can turn decidedly 'unsociable' to people not in the group (and probably to some in the group as well). I absolutely agree that if I knew in advance there was going to be a group that would be booking public areas for their restricted use, I would rather not be on that ship.

 

Emjsea also mentioned Bears... all I could think of when I saw it was can you imagine how the 'hairiest chest' contest would go on that ship? YIKES!! :eek:

[bplazo]

I certainly wouldn't want to get in one of those hot tubs after one of their parties!!! :o Yikes.

 

And that is seriously out of control. I really have to condemn a cruise line for having a group that is specifically about having group sex on board with kids (or, honestly, anyone that isn't into it). I really feel sorry for the crew that might have to serve drinks during the "parties."

 

I wouldnt mind being the server during one of these "parties". These groups are usually alot of fun and they are very happy people. I think it would be a great time.

 

As for the hot tubs, I always stay out of those! It is just like sharing a bathtub with strangers.

[brazilgirl]

Lifestylers-

 

When I first saw this thread , my reaction was one of judgement and for that I apologize.I try to teach my children that we must only make judgements based on personal experience , not on the basis of what we think we "know" about a certain group of people.And hear I was being hypocritical.

 

I was very impressed by your posts-thank you for giving us a "lesson" on a lifestyle we know very little about. Your comment were well written , polite and balanced.I think you have good reason to exercise caution when using the boards-stereotypes and rude comment can be hurtful.

 

I´d have no problem taking my family on the cruise in question as long as was certain that the group wouldn´t dominate the ship (bad choice of words?)

I´d have more of a problem with the clog dancers(hate noise!)

By the way , in the discussion of alternative lifestyle the term "bears" was mentioned. Sorry to be uninformed but could someone explainwhat the term refers to.

Thanks Kim

[emjsea]

Bears are a sub-set of gay men that enjoy being hairy and often bearded and either like being a little bit on the chubby side or very muscled (like a football player). They like their beer and the kind of masculine comraderie you would see, say, among of group of similar looking straight football fans. Think lumberjacks or dock-workers.

[brazilgirl]

Thanks for the info!

Do they thump their chests and burp too? (just a little humor there!)

Kim

[bullydogsmama]

I've been on NCL and they don't have any "nude" decks. How are they going to get away with that? I would reschedule even if I weren't traveling with children. It sounds like they plan to be quite intrusive to other pax. What with nude sunbathing and hot tub parties-I'll bet there's going to be a lot of upset pax.

 

 

We were on the Jewel in Feb and there were some VERY MUCH topless gals way up on the Sun Deck.:eek: Wouldn't let DH go any higher that deck 13!

[emjsea]

Thanks for the info!

Do they thump their chests and burp too? (just a little humor there!)

Kim

 

Actually that would be very likely!!! :rolleyes: They see themselves as responding to the "prissy" overly-mannered image that some people have of gay men and some gay men actually exhibit (you know like the Queer Eye guys) and sometimes go a little too far in the other direction.