What are parents thinking?

[stbmom]

Okay, I have read all the replies about children running wild and pushing elevator buttons and such. That can ruin a cruise for others, but there is an even bigger question I have.

Why in the world would you let your minor child run around on a boat filled with strangers? I would be concerned about Pedophiles, predators, and the like. I have gone to the night clubs after hours (after midnight) and seen teenage girls in short skits dancing with obviously grown men. My last Carnival Cruise, three teenage girls had to be kicked out of the "all about sex" game that was for adults only.

Am I parinoid, or is stranger danger not a problem anymore? Yes, elevators and running down the halls is bad - but what about the other dangers on a ship.

I am always floored by the young people, especially young teenage girls (looking like they are 12 - 16 years old, dressing like street walkers) on the boat. Some seem to be looking for boys. They may not even know the dangers that can happen with older men. And, even worse, the really young ones allowed to roam free. A pedophile would do well to book a cruise during Spring or Fall break. They would have free access to a number of children and could probably easily not be identified. Just a thought from my parinoid mind.

And I am okay with flaming even if it makes one parent think twice about the "free reign - just check in" policy.

[stretch]

I've oft times wondered the same thing as you. After much thought I've come to the conclusion the parents of these young people DO NOT THINK and really don't care what the kids are doing as long as they're out of their hair. After all, there's a staff of about 1600 to baby sit and act as security. Good topic, lets see what happens from here.

Stretch

[Toto2Kansas]

I totally agree.................................... and have NO idea what these parents are thinking turning these young teens loose. :eek:

Kind of makes me wonder what type of parents are raising these kids that they feel so secure in the fact that nothing can happen because they are on a Cruise Ship?

[Heidict]

I agree with Stretch. Seems these parents don't want to be bothered with watching and or disciplining their kids because they are on vacation. I guess they figure the kid is stuck on the ship and can't go anywhere but they never stop to think about all the danger that is present on the ship.

 

Sad. Not just because their childrens rude behaviour can ruin the cruise for other passengers but because they are putting their childs welfare and even life in danger. I know that you can't watch your kids 24 hours a day but some people are so irresponsible as parents that they shouldn't be allowed to have children. Maybe if they taught them right in the home and disciplined them they wouldn't act like such animals when they are away from their parents.

 

Heidi

[Desertbelle]

Ummm, parents aren't raising these children, child care centers are, schools are, strangers are, tired grandparents are....whatever mixture of childcare that parents can throw together are raising our country's children. You can thank the "It takes a village" mentality. It frees up the parents from the responsibility and puts the blame on "society". No idea how this will all end but it's not just on cruise ships that you see these problems. Very sad indeed.

[LoriLinay]

This is the hard part (at least for me) about parenting... How much freedom, and when? I'm a super neurotic parent, so my kids are used to checking in the SECOND I tell them to, or they know it's gonna get ugly.

 

Last cruise my kids were 11 and 13. Neither wanted to participate in the kids clubs. So I had a pretty easy time keeping track of them. Our next cruise they will be 16 and 14. I'll have my work cut out for me. Oddly enough, they both seem to still LIKE me though, and don't mind hanging out.

 

I'm always amazed when I am driving around town and I see YOUNG children walking on busy streets alone. Just takes a second for a car to pull up and WHOOOOSH...gone.

 

I hope this thread takes a positive spin and alerts some first time (and 2nd and 3rd and 4th) time cruising parents, that just because it's a contained vessel, it's still full of people. Good and bad. And the stranger danger at home, should not be lightened up at sea.

 

Our last cruise if the kids wanted to go back to the cabin for something, I'd say..."be back in 11 minutes" (I always make it a weird time). One time my daughter wasn't back in 15. So I was on my way to find her and give her the what for all. I found her in the hall outside our cabin, talking to THE CAPTAIN. (I let that one go!! LOL!!!)

[NancyB84]

Great topic. IMHO, sometimes parents don't think about things like this when planning a vacation. (not because they are bad parents.... just because it is something that they may not have thought of)!!! People forget that a ship is a mini society full of all different kinds of people. Maybe this will make a few parents think twice about letting kids roam free. We didn't let our boys roam free when we went on our last cruise, even though one was old enough to sign him and his brother in and out of Adventure Ocean. But, to be honest, I hadn't given much thought to the possibility of pedophiles etc on board a ship. We simply keep a close eye on our kids as a rule, but if I had been thinking of letting them roam free, a post like this would have made me think twice!!!! Too many weirdo's out there... even on a ship, and it is nice to have a reminder!!!! Thanks for posting this topic and I hope that it stays positive!!!!!!

[nosnobunny]

Interesting topic.

 

My children are all grown but I do remember what it was like raising them. Teenagers are hormones with legs. Of course they're looking for boys, that's what girls do. That's all they think about for about 4 years! :rolleyes:

 

Parents need to remember that a ship is like a small town and everything that goes with it. If my children couldn't stay out after 11PM at home why would I think it would be any different on a ship? Just because I'm on vacation doesn't mean I've ceased being a parent. Know where your kids are, who they're with and what they're doing. It's your responsibility not RCI's.

 

OTOH I don't think there's a pedophile waiting around every corner. Use common sense and don't let paranoia take over. For instance, do you know for a fact that the older men the girls were dancing with were strangers? Maybe yes, maybe no.

 

Beth

[Desertbelle]

I agree that teens are hormones on legs, and I fully understand and even remember the need to attract boys. What I don't understand are parents who allow a 13 year old girl to wear a very tight, very short tank top that says something along the lines of "Hot Stuff" or "Made for Fun". What are parents thinking??

[LoriLinay]

Beth, we always post right around the same time! So either we are on the same schedule, or are on ALL the time! LOL!!

 

I totally have never understood those sweatpants on the junior high girls that have "SEXY" written across the behind in glittery letters.

 

And now it's happened. I've just become my mother.

[nosnobunny]

I think we can place some of the blame for their clothing choices squarely on the entertainment industry. If you want an example, take a look at Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and others. They look like street walkers and want us to believe how innocent they are. Ya right. :rolleyes:

 

Beth

[nosnobunny]

Beth, we always post right around the same time! So either we are on the same schedule, or are on ALL the time! LOL!!

 

I totally have never understood those sweatpants on the junior high girls that have "SEXY" written across the behind in glittery letters.

 

And now it's happened. I've just become my mother.

 

There's one other possibility ~ we're goofing off at the same time. ;)

 

Beth

[FinelyCruising]

I think that OP doesn't get the fashion trends and is an old-timer fighting living in a very different and changed world.

[NancyB84]

I think we can place some of the blame for their clothing choices squarely on the entertainment industry. If you want an example, take a look at Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and others. They look like street walkers and want us to believe how innocent they are. Ya right. :rolleyes:

 

Beth

 

I'll second that.

[ebk2795]

The parents who let their young children roam a cruise ship unattended are probably the same parents who go to the mall and let their very young children walk 15 feet behind them. What are they thinking? When they don't care at home, they aren't going to be any different when they get on a cruise ship.

[Cruiser Forever]

When my daughters were younger and cruised as kids and preteens, they were always with us or with the kids group supervised. I never let them be on their own. Because it is true there could be crazy passengers and crew staff that could do anything to you child. Letting you child run free so that you can soak up the sun is plain irresponsible. Poor parenting. :(

[Cruiser Forever]

I'll second that.

 

 

Spears and all those teeny bopper singers are terrible role models for young girls. And parents need to step up and ban that garbage. Kids are growing up too fast these days. :mad:

[Tatka]

I spend enough quality time with my son during our cruises, but he is 13 and I don't think it would be fun for him to be all the time with us... So of course we let him hang out with his new friends. However we talk to him before and during the cruise about unacceptable behavoir(elevators,rudness to other PAX). He is not allowed to go to other peoples staterooms(even his friends). We also ask him to check with us every hour or hour and a half. We let him stay late (they usually stay by the pool and talk... I've checked couple of times to make sure he was there).

 

I only do it because I trust him and I feel he is honest with us and knows how to behave in the different situations. For example he told me when one of the older boys had a bottle of alcohol (bought by the parents btw!!!!).

 

I feel that if you don't want to see surprises when teens are older you have to let kids have some freedom and situations when they have to make their own decisions.(while they are still younger and close to you)

[Arizona Cruz Chic]

I couldn't agree more......parents don't care what the kids do, they feel they can't get lost or get off the ship so parents let them run wild and do whatever thay want......just don't bother me attitude! They think because they have made new friends aboard they are safe....they are not safe!

 

From what I've seen with the way young teenage girls dress today, they are just asking for trouble. When it happens on a cruise ship who will be the blame? Parents or cruise line? No matter what age the kids are, the ship and crew are not a babysitter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

***

[sweet angel]

We just got off the DisneyWonder 3-night. I let my 13 year old son have pretty much free reign, but he knew he had to check in periodically, and be with us for dinner every night. We kept a notebook in the room and he had to write where he was going to be. He's a good kid, very trustworthy, good head on his shoulders and he knows enough NOT to get in trouble because he knows the *** would hit the fan if he did. He spent most of his time with other kids in the arcade and eating cheeseburgers and ice cream. I don't think he would've had much fun if he had to spend the whole time with us.

 

However, I'm really glad he's a boy, not a girl. I can't imagine letting a daughter out in most of the clothes I see the girls wearing. We wore tube tops and short shorts in my day, but we never ACTED as suggestively as the young girls do these days.

[LoriLinay]

Sidebar here... that post reminded me of one of my "red faced" moments at a teen. I was at a "kegger" and wearing my super cool peach colored tube top and gauze shirt that I had tied at the waist. It was a super hot summer night so I took off the blouse and had the arms tied around my waist. Yup, Dave P (I'd put his whole name but who knows...maybe after 27 years, he's a poster here too!) came up behind me and pulled the tube top down. And I don't mean a little, and he didn't let go.

[stbmom]

Nosnobunny,

You mentioned:

 

For instance, do you know for a fact that the older men the girls were dancing with were strangers? Maybe yes, maybe no.

 

If these girls were dancing like that with someone who was a family friend - those parents need to be SHOT!! I'm sorry, but I don't see when it would ever be appropriate for a teenager to have her butt grabed and her butt up against the "front" of a friend of the family, or even worse - a member of her family. I'm sorry, but a stranger would be MUCH, MUCH better in this case.

[1corona4u]

Ummm, parents aren't raising these children, child care centers are, schools are, strangers are, tired grandparents are....whatever mixture of childcare that parents can throw together are raising our country's children. You can thank the "It takes a village" mentality. It frees up the parents from the responsibility and puts the blame on "society". No idea how this will all end but it's not just on cruise ships that you see these problems. Very sad indeed.

I don't see it that way at all. The reasons you stated above for childcare are the direct result of both parents working. I also think it can be about money and stuff now days. After all, one has to keep up with the Jones's. The homes, the cars, lifestyle, etc, etc., etc. Gone are the days when dad worked, mom stayed home.

 

There are so many reasons we aren't living like families did in the 50's, that we could go on forever. Much more than the "it takes a village" mentality that you mentioned.

 

Economy

Careers

Lifestyles

Increased divorce rate

 

Just to name a few....

 

That's my perspective anyway.

[nosnobunny]

Nosnobunny,

You mentioned:

 

 

If these girls were dancing like that with someone who was a family friend - those parents need to be SHOT!! I'm sorry, but I don't see when it would ever be appropriate for a teenager to have her butt grabed and her butt up against the "front" of a friend of the family, or even worse - a member of her family. I'm sorry, but a stranger would be MUCH, MUCH better in this case.

 

Your OP didn't say that the dancing was suggestive. But if that was the case, I agree it was inappropriate.

 

Beth

[Marge M]

I think we can place some of the blame for their clothing choices squarely on the entertainment industry. If you want an example, take a look at Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and others. They look like street walkers and want us to believe how innocent they are. Ya right. :rolleyes:

I know it's difficult to find age-appropriate little girl clothes, especially for a 10 yr old who's outgrown children's sizes and is 5 ft tall. That would be my daughter. However, I have never allowed her to dress like a "street walker", wear make-up, or color her hair, as many of her age-mates do in her school (yes, 9 and 10 yr olds wearing eye shadow in school!!). Ultimately the parents are the ones purchasing these inappropriate clothes and allowing the make-up etc. Just because the entertainment industry is promoting it, doesn't mean the parents have to buy it.

 

I will be keeping a tight rein on my daughter on our up-coming cruise. And I don't mind a bit!! :) Parenting shouldn't go out the door when you step on the boat.