cruiseguys2009

I feel like you should get in touch with Sixthman and have them sponsor a JW and Jerome cruise charter. It would seriously sell out faster than a Tragically Hip farewell concert. Which is Canadian for really, really fast. Your review is getting me through the last days of school.

My motto is Live and Learn...............:D, Thanks so much!

Five Bongs!

So here it is, almost 5PM, and we are used to already have sailed away by this time on other cruises. All the other ships in port have left except The Norwegian Escape and The MSC Divina (Been on her and she is a gorgeous ship, but most Americans do not care for her, read my review). I am not used to sailing at 7PM, and since it's Daylight Savings Time, there is none of the "romance of the darkness" in leaving at this time either. Nonetheless, here comes the BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG. A Bong on a ship is a Long Beeeeeeep and very loud and usually signals an emergency life boat drill.

Our Muster Station (I love it when folks call it a Mustard Station, as if looking for the condiments to put on a hot dog or hamburger) was in the Theater, forward. We had Life Boat Station Number 3, located ALL THE WAY DOWN THE STEPS TO THE FRONT ROW, great seats for the shows but horrible for the Muster Station as the crowds are vast and confused and move like comatose turtles.

Trust me, if we are going down, ala Concordia, then I am not going to the front row of the theater. Nosiree. I am going to a life boat.

Any way, we arrive at the theater, modestly early, because we know the drill and there are literally 150 older generation folks just standing at the top not moving, blocking the way. "Oh yeah", I turn to Jerome saying, "These are the folks waiting for The Miracle!" Jerome smirks back, knowing what I mean which you will find out in a minute. "Excuse Me, Pardon Me, Excuse Me" I say, feeling like Moses parting the Red (Senior Citizen) Sea "So where do you want me to go?", barks one lady to me in her Brooklyn accent. "To your Life Boat station and take a seat!", I retorted back.

All we over hear as we walk through this crowd is "Oh My Gawd, Henry I can't walk down those stairs, my arthritis!" "Emma, we are not going to walk those steps, I will fall." "OY, Harold, you know me and my balance, I can't walk down steps." "I'm not going down there, I am claustrophobic." "Madeline, why do we have to go there, we're here, that's all they want, right? Of course right. We stay." "I can't walk down steps I am on Medication" "George, we are staying put, I am not getting stuck down there and have to wait in line later for the buffet". Oh My Goodness Gracious. Yeah? I bet in an emergency they can all climb to get in a life boat pretty darn quick. Please folks, If I get this old and entitled and crotchety, just throw me overboard.

These are the same folks who rush through a 6pm dinner, shovel, shovel, shovel their food, snap their fingers at the waitstaff shouting "Hurry Up!" then who run to the theater and rush, rush, rush down these very same steps, to get to the best seats, saving more seats for Emma, Henry, George, Maude, Madge and Madeline. Yep. I know.

These are the same folks who are first in the Tender Line and have no issues getting into a rocking tender in rough waters to go ashore.

That's why I call it the Miracle Life Boat Drill, because as soon as the Safety Drill is over.........."It's a Miracle" "Joy! Rapture!" They can all WALK, and walk briskly, again! Up the stairs, down the stairs, from buffet station to buffet station, and certainly have no trouble being first when it's time to play Bingo, and they take all those seats in the front of the theater, miraculously cured to be able to walk those stairs all the way down to the front, while the ship is moving no less.

So Jerome and I get to the bottom, front row seating, have our sign and sail cards scanned and checked in, then we wait. Finally the drill begins, and they show us how to use our life jacket, like really? If there is a real evacuation, then I am not going to remember but hope I can figure it out. If I can't remember, then God help those ninny's up top who are awaiting The Miracle!

Plus, as I said before, if the boat is sinking, I am not going to the front row of the Theater, I am going to a life boat, just sayin'.

So I begin to daydream again with that fantasy bubble on my head, So, Well, maybe I will go to the Theater, because in all the hubb bubb, then I can try on all the sparkly costumes while I wait for the Life Boat. Now that would be fun.

I would come down to the Life Boat in one of those skimpy sequined Vegas Showgirl costumes. The Crew would yell, "Women and Children and.......and......what-ever (as they look at me dripping in sequins) first!"

Ok, so the Drill is over (and my sparkly Life Boat daydream is over as well,) and Jerome and I look behind us and surely as Gawd is My Witness, The Miracle happened and all the medicated and infirmed comatose turtles turned and moved so quickly to get where ever they were going. Scurried like little rats. Only thing is, all the "First Exiter's" from all the other Muster Stations are also running and they all meet in the middle in a Cluster-hockeypuck (rhymes with) bumping into each other. It has been said before, and I agree, that the only time the ship felt crowded was when the Safety Drill was over and until the crowd disperses, it is very crowded. The Escape does an enchanting job of filtering folks to so many venues that it never really felt crowded again. So Jerome and I sat. We patiently waited. And waited. And waited. Did I mention we waited?

"I need a Martini."

___________________________________

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Jerome suggested we head up to VIBE to check it out and I agreed, funny thing, all these folks were waiting for elevators, and Karma being what it is sometimes, Jerome and I were standing at the first elevator, just talking when it magically opened and there was room for just two more, US. Sorrrrry.

We got out at floor 18, walked out on deck, gorgeous outside by the way, and we headed up the staircase to Deck 19. At the top of the staircase, we came to a more private deck, complete with a misting feature, two Jacuzzi hot tubs and a full bar. Actually, if you miss out on VIBE, this is just as nice, as the bar is 1/2 public and the other half is on the VIBE side. Plenty of chaise lounges and it does not get crowded until about 11 am because everyone wants to be with the People Soup or the Wee Wee Pool instead, and don't look any further.

There it was, The Famous Alice in Wonderland Moving Glass Door with the word VIBE inscribed, behind which, the paradise of VIBE is promised.

Jerome put his special VIBE key card in the auto card reader and nothing happened. He did it again, nada. I put my card in and, voila, the doors magically began to open. See me smirk and stick out my tongue to Jerome. Slowly the door opens, and everyone behind us is leaning over trying to steal a glimpse. Ohhhh. Ahhhhh.

We had our orange wrist bands on, and were immediately greeted by the wonderful boys of VIBE. Awesome welcome. The bar was full with soon to be buddies for the week, drinking buddies, except for two seats, and Jerome and I decided to take them. The folks were just getting ready for Shot O'clock.

Shot O'clock is a nightly ritual in VIBE at around 4is-5ish each day. One shot, two shots, three shots, floor. I am not good at shots. I can't drink Tequila either. If I have one Tequila, I am fine and happy. If I have two Tequila's I am naked. Doesn't matter where I am or with whom I am with, I am peeling off my clothes. I can have as much Vodka and not get a reaction, but give me shots or Tequila and caution goes right out the window. You do not want to see this big ol' Queen naked. I promise your eyes would be scarred for life.

"No shots for me!" I announce. All the folks at the bar let out a big ol' "Waaaaa". Then this woman comes up to Jerome and me and introduces herself. Through this thick Southern accent she lets us know that she is Quasi-with Norwegian. I said "Really?" "What do you do?" She replied, "I am a travel agent for Cruises, Inc and exclusively sell cruises for NCL." I came out with, I think, a "How nice". I wanted a Martini and no one could talk me into a shot. Jerome on the other hand has absolutely no will power and if it's in front of him with a proof level, he is going to down that sucker so fast, his head usually spins.

At this point in our conversation, I just realized, and turned to Jerome and whispered, "She is the VIBE Den Mother." Yep, that is exactly what she was. I am going to call her Fly Girl, for several reasons.

First, she asked Jerome what he did, and Jerome said "Fly for United". To which she replied "Oh I wish I was still a Flight Attendant for US Air." Ohhkaay, I thought, "back to you". Then she proceeded to do the fingers pointing to the exit safety demo routine. Ohhhkaay. She is already three sheets to the wind, working on the fourth. And then we meet her daughter, whom I will nickname Shot-a-rina for reasons that will materialize.

Second, she was a Fly Girl. She ruled the roost every day, going from group to group, chaise to chaise, talking to everyone, and always making sure we were imbibed. I never saw either of them outside of VIBE the whole week, so I think that they are both still there, and never got off the ship.

So, it's Shot-A-Rina's 21st Birthday Cruise. Remember I said before, One Shot, Two Shot, Three Shot, Floor. Yep, Shot-A-Rina, in the matter of about 25 minutes was in the bathroom, on the floor....ahh the joys of being 21 again. Shot, shot, shot, throw up, throw up, feel fine, more shot, shot, shot, throw up, throw up, feel so fine. Yep, I remember this routine well. That's when I learned about me and Tequila! This became an every day occurrence. Shot-A-Rina would say to me, "Shhhhhhhh" My mother doesn't know I am doing shots." "Really?" I replied, "How do you explain the prolonged visits on the floor of the John?" The girl certainly had a memorable experience, for me mind you, not for her, not that she would remember any of it the whole week.

Ahhh, so where was I. Oh yes, "SHOTS!" "SHOTS!" "SHOTS!". None for me but I did get a Martini in a lovely Plastique Krystaline Martini glass, that as soon as we set sail, yes, we set sail, it was 7PM and we are finally moving, the wind knocked all the vodka out of my drink, leaving me with only my pornographic olives and pickle combination.

I forgot to mention the Pornographic Pickles and Olive Combo. It seems that an olive is not enough, or a Pickle either. I love Pickle Martini's, by the way (those are Martinis that just replace olive juice in a Dirty Martini with pickle juice, really good). But NCL has Big Queen (Me!) Olives that are stuffed in the hole with little Gherkin Pickles protruding out, quite the thing that makes me go HMMMMMMM:rolleyes:. The olive with inserted pickle graces every Martini, Bloody Mary and anything else you may need a suggestive condiment for. You can just imagine what it SUGGESTED to me..............:eek: HMMMMMMM. I usually found another olive that was missing the pickle and then placed it on the other side of the pickle with olive so it would be happy too. Kind of a double-header, (Baseball, you naughty freak). Perhaps.

Fly Girl was going from person to person to person getting all the scoop about all our lives and just was having a truly Busybody Blast. I found her quite interesting, to say the least. And that thick southern drawl was just so much fun. Ah, Bless her heart. Ohh! Ohh!, who knows what that means?

We saw "J" sitting at the bar and sat next to him and I had not properly introduced myself in the VIBE line earlier, and so as I extended my hand to shake his, he quickly drew back his hand putting it under his arm (like that girl in the movie "SuperStar" and don't you know I waited for him to smell his fingers like she did) saying "Oh no!" He seemed a bit frazzled, "I never shake hands with anyone, I am a GAMER." Ok, what the heck is a Gamer, can someone please enlighten me? I asked him if he were, like a Germaphobe, like Howie Mandel, to which he said no. He works in some sort of computers thingamajigs doing some sort of somethingorother. Sorry, I am too old to understand. Oohhhkkkay. This is becoming interesting, and we have just left the port for a long seven nights.

I have a week with these people!

Then he suddenly blurts out (literally out of the blue, startling me) "Oh and you were right!" "Right about what?" I asked. He replied "You were right about my underwear." At that moment, I had not a clue to what he meant and was completely dumbfounded. Jerome became very interested in our conversation just then too, and had his eyebrow raised, (staring at me with this look like, Trouble, what have you gotten yourself into this time?) "Downstairs." J said. "In the VIBE line" "You asked me if my underwear matched." My eyes opened wide, I can't believe I was having a Senior Moment and forgot how crude I was (and usually), and I nodded my head. "So?" I said, "I was right?" saying it as seductively as I could, and Jerome murmuring again in my ear as he turned away, "Slut". "Yep," he said laughing, "It all matches!" Auntie JW knows these things. Yes I do. And I am not a slut, Jerome.

Jerome was imbibed, all those shots, and I still wanted a Martini that I could actually drink, so I suggested we go down to the cabin to get ready for dinner and on the way, stop at Tobacco Road to get cocktails to enjoy while we dress. We did after all have reservations at Taste for 8:30pm. I was getting hungry and didn't want to be late.

I gave my signature waves and yelled "Tootles" to everyone. See you all for sea day tomorrow!!!!!!!

"Weren't Mr and Mrs Milner wonderful?" (Who?, Wait?, What? JW Who? You're thinking.....This is the first I am hearing of them.) Jerome said "Who???" "Mr and Mrs Milner" I replied.(Not their real name but close), "They were the ones sitting across from me at the bar that I was telling dirty jokes to, they were such a wonderful, fun couple." I Loved the Milners.

Ahh. The Milners.

Just to give you an idea of how "crazy creative" we at Marriott can be. This buffet presentation is provided for our an exceptional Guest experience. It's the little things that really do matter.

His name is Clarense, known by all on board as The Chocolate Cowboy. He is from Honduras and is fabulous!

Thank you so much! Yes it's Clarense, The Chocolate Cowboy! What an amazing hi-energy guy who is a singular sensation unto his own. His comedic routines were effortless and flawless. Once captured at the bar, we were hooked for the week, always making time to stop by for at least a drink to watch and enjoy the antics.

This is one reason we enjoyed The Escape so much. There were so many areas that were tucked away that were very interesting, and also filtered folks into the area so that, rarely, did I feel overwhelmed and the ship overcrowded, with 5,500 others on board.

When everyone finally gets on The Escape, don't forget look Clarense up at the outdoor, On The Waterfront, "It's 5 O'clock Somewhere" Bar.

I finally had my Martini, it was marvelous, and we got a chance to walk outside for the first time, onto the Waterfront, out the doors of Tobacco Road. As we walked outside, there, to the left, is an Outside "It's 5 O'clock Somewhere" bar.

I must tell you. This is a fun gathering place all throughout the cruise. There is one particular Special Bartender who rules this roost! I believe he is either from Grenada, The Bahamas or Jamaica and always is wearing a straw hat. He is an experienced conversationalist and I am sorry not to have gotten his name. The man is truly animated and extremely funny. He keeps a captive audience, makes a mean cocktail and has a crowd at all times of the day or night. He is really a joy, and if anyone knows his name, please acknowledge it here.

This man is a complete and genuine service professional. But, he just another reason that The Norwegian Escape is as special as it is.

So, I've come through the three secret doors back into The public area by The District and Waterfront. I turn and walk just past the forward elevators and there, just on my right is "La Cuchina", the Italian Restaurant (Fabulous, we enjoyed it) and on my left is the inside part of "It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere Bar" (They are having a Private Sail-A-Way party). Then I come to what is now my absolute favorite bar, Tobacco Road. It is Lush, Rustic, a Classic Country Club feel and the Cocktails? Ah-May-Zing. True Handcrafted Classic Cocktails, Bourbons, Manhattans and Martini's, Single Malt Scotch, and some fabulous Bartenders who know what a handcrafted Martini or Manhattan is.

In the one corner of Tobacco Road is the Cigar/Smoking lounge. It was always busy, and frankly, I do love the smell of a good cigar, which there are plenty of, and all different kinds to purchase and smoke in the lounge.

So I belly up to the bar for my first Handcrafted Martini, the bar is crowded, laughter and the party mood is really beginning to form. Then I thought that I would do something nice for Jerome and order him a Manhattan and take it back to the room for him to enjoy while he is unpacking. I could order my Martini and take it with me as well and I could sit on the balcony enjoying my libation without bothering Jerome. What a great idea.

I order for myself first, "May I please have a Grey Goose Martini, Straight Up, Very Dry, Very, Very well chilled, with Olives?" The Bartender acknowledged my order, and began the lovely procedures of carefully crafting my cocktail. First, filling my selected Martini glass with ice and water to chill the glass. He then proceeded to mix my cocktail. He didn't just throw the ingredients together, he masterfully added ice to the shaker, one cube at a time using silver tongs, then slowly pouring the vodka, then capping it and here we go again, KC and The Sunshine Band perform live: "Shake, Shake, Shake.......Shake, Shake, Shake and he keeps on shaking. He poured the ice and water out of the now, nicely chilled Martini glass and then filtered my cocktail with an honest to goodness cocktail strainer into the glass (Not like a speed bartender's way of putting one glass inside the shaker and pouring it out all at once into a martini glass that has not been chilled....gosh I really hate that, slopping it all over the place and then it tastes like a Margarita because no one bothered to clean the shaker before making my drink.....has that every happened to you?) That is the difference between a Cocktail and just a Drink. He poked three olives onto a bamboo pick and added them to the cocktail. Yum, my mouth was watering.

He places the cocktail on a beverage napkin in front of me, I am going to Tinkle. There, on the top of the cocktail, is a thin layer of frozen vodka with ice particles. It was like a little mini ice skating rink that Dorothy Hammil herself could do twirls on. Oh yes, I was going to enjoy this Martini. I happily sighed. I gave him my key card, he ran it through the computer, returned it and I had a dollar tip on the bar for him, he thanked me, waiting to see my reaction to his creation. I slowly reached for the stem of the glass. I could just taste that first sip and the chilled ice crystals on my lips. I was in true Martini Heaven with anticipation. I was bringing the glass romantically to my lips, slowly, thinking all the while I was in a big old fashioned Hollywood production and a camera was panning my profile as I brought the glass closer and closer, I had hi-gloss Candy Apple Jungle Red Lipstick on as the camera focused in on my big red lips as I went to take my first sip. I parted my lips moistening them with my tongue, I had the glass right up to take the cold liquid lovingly in my parched, prepared mouth............................whathe?

When all of the sudden I get knocked in the elbow of the arm I was holding the glass in and the Martini goes all over me and the bar, not a drop in my mouth, but I managed to still be holding on to the stem, no sir, I was not about to let that go.

This Gal, already heavily imbibed (it's only about four o'clock, how many Ultimate Beverage Package cocktails could she have possible have had already?) knocks into me, stumbling over herself with an empty wine glass and yells to the bartender, "Hey Bro' Mister!" "Getmepleash, getsme a glass of Prosciutto." Wait, what? I shoot a crazy look at her and then at The Bartender. He then looked at her and said "Pardon Me?" I looked at her, still clutching my glass with all the vodka she made me spill still being cleaned up by the Bartender and myself, when she blurts out again "Iwantschu to givezzzzz me anotha glazzzz of Prosciutto." Prosciutto? Prosciutto? What, they have Meat Cocktails now?

I turn to the bartender as we look at each other inquisitively and I say so just the two of us can hear, "Yeah, can I please get a nice, tall Turkey and Swiss on the Rocks?" "And, Make it a double!" We both laugh. This girl is swaying, back and forth, back and forth. All she wants is a Prosciutto. I kind of fancy Serrano myself, but that's just me.

The Bartender looks at her, and she is swaying back and forth and the ship is not even moving yet. I know he was not going to serve her any more alcohol at that time. Then a friend she is with comes up and says that "She has had enough, no more for now!" "I should say not!" I said, "That Prosciutto is really strong stuff!" The friend had absolutely no idea of what I was talking about, looked at me briefly, seemingly annoyed, probably thought I was trashed too, and proceeded to get her friend, Miss Italian Ham, (I will call her Hammy for short) away from the bar.

"PROSECCO!" I said as she was leaving. Goodness, gracious, me. If you are going to drink it, know that it's called Prosecco! It's Italian sparkling wine. Geez, Prosciutto.

I turn to the Bartender as Hammy stumbles out of the bar and just shake my head, and he was already one step ahead of my request and making me, yet another, icy chilled Martini replacement. The special, first Martini moment had passed, so this time, I took a good look around me before I took a sip, and ended up taking a good guzzle. Yum, "AHHHHHHHH!" I sighed. That is good. "Now get me a Prosciutto!" We both laughed.

I asked if he could give me a Manhattan to take to the room for Jerome and he asked what Bourbon would I like. After checking out the awesome selection of small batch bourbons, I chose Bulliet. The Bartender took a special glass pitcher, added the bourbon, bitters, vermouth and a little ice, then began to elegantly stir the Manhattan. When he was satisfied, he added it to a Rocks Glass filled with fresh ice and strained the Manhattan into it and added cherries. Beautiful!

I gave him my key card for the cocktails, they were included in our Ultimate Beverage Package (Nice!) and I left a couple of dollars on the bar, grabbing both drinks to take back to the cabin. Oh, Jerome was going to be sooooo surprised, I am bringing him a Manhattan.

I proceeded to get to door number one in the secret hallway to our cabin, and thankfully someone was coming out of it and held the door for me, juggling two cocktails and heavy ship corridor doors that swing shut quickly, is a feat unto itself.

Door number two, as luck would have it, yet someone else coming through and held the door for me. "Thank You!" I said.

Now, here I am, I made it to the third door, the Cabin corridor entry door. How the heck am I going to do this. Come on JW, you have been in the service industry all your life, you know how to handle a Martini Glass and a Rocks Glass together. But this door is a heavy slammy-shut-on-my-behind kind of door. Ok, got the knob, turning the knob, opening the door with my pinky, nothing spilled yet, it's opening, it's opening, it's open and I got it propped open with my elbow! I take a momentary sigh of relief, move my hands in front of me, then trying to maneuver my feet, with my elbow balancing the door, and "WHAM" "CRASH" "SPLAT". My elbow slipped, The door closes on my arms, I drop the drinks all over the floor and now there is glass everywhere. Oh Lordy Be.

Fortunately, as I said this is a crew corridor, at that moment a crew member saw what happened and insisted that he will take care of the glass and for me not to touch anything. I felt like a total boob. My first drink, my Martini was spilled all over me, the second is now on the floor. I cannot catch a break.

Back to Tobacco Road I go. The Bartender looks at me and says, "You are finished with them already?" I said no, the second one spilled too. He proceeded to make round two for Jerome, round three for me. I asked him to just make Jerome's Manhattan first so I could take it to him and then I would come back to enjoy my Martini, finally.

I brought Jerome's drink to door number one, got through without incident. Get to door number two, same thing. I am on a roll again. JW here comes door number three, I am walking proud as a Peacock until, and wouldn't you know it, the side entrance of The District is now just to my left, and barrelling out of that door smack right into me is, who do you think? Miss Hammy, stumbling all the while, mumbling, drooling, a total mess and looking for the Ladies Room and causing me to take a bath in a Manhattan. Goshdagnabit! Noooooo, this cannot be happening to me! Crash, the glass goes down again, but this time, only broke in two pieces. I carefully picked it up and turn around and go back to Tobacco Road once again.

I have the glass in my hand, I needed it for evidence to prove that it really did drop AGAIN, and the Bartender just looks at me, shakes his head and then proceeds to make another one. "What happened?" He asked. "You'll never guess!" I replied and then continued "Miss Prosciutto" rammed into me looking for the ladies room." (I had not named her Miss Hammy until this story, so on board, she was Miss Prosciutto) Gosh, with those initial first day Ultimate Beverage Package charges, NCL must think I am more of a lush than I really am (On the first day, I said)

Round three, lets try this again. I have Jerome's drink in my hand, I am covered in Martini/Manhattan cocktail concoctions, I smell like a cross between Invictus Cologne, Martinis and Manhattans. Kind of like a seedy bar trying to cover up the stale liquor smell with Febreeze. I am bound and determined to do this now and get to the room.

I go through door number one. No issues. I go through door number two, again, no issues. With a careful, determined look on my face, I stop at the doors to The District, like I am at a stop sign in traffic. I look both ways. I take one step towards the door and "WHOOSH" the door opens and there is Jerome, stopping quickly in his tracks and stands there looking at me, as I am holding a Manhattan, soaking wet and all bourbon martini stained. I look at him, huffing and puffing, with him looking back at me with his look of "Should I ask what happened to him?" I thrust my arm out handing him the drink and sarcastically say, "Here, I have been trying to get one of these to you for about 20 minutes now with no luck."

Jerome finally says "JW, you are a mess, what happened?" I just stood there, silent, as people were coming and going, Jerome was holding and sipping on his cocktail like we were having social hour in the dang corridor for Chrysakes.

I finally just broke down from all the first day emotions and excitement and blubbered out, "Miss Proscuitto banged into me not once, but twice, the doors attacked me, I was trying to do something nice and all the while the doors were preventing me from doing it, all I wanted is to have a Martini on our Balcony, and I tried to get to the room three times with cocktails, and the bartender thinks I am nuts, I smell like Perry Ellis' new men's cologne "Alcoholic Dreams", and I have ice in my shoe melting" Jerome had no idea what I was talking about and he only said "JW, you are not making sense, but you don't usually anyway" (Oh the look I just shot him, that sunsomabische!) "I was just coming out to the bar to have a drink with you because I am finished packing". "I figured you were out at that bar out there that looks like a Country Club, your kind of a place", I interjected "Tobacco Road", and he continued, "I figured you had already met 200 of your newest, closest friends on this ship!"

"Here, lets go back to the bar and get you a Martini." Is it any wonder to anyone why we have been together for so long?

Trouble is finally going to get that Martini!

We are sailing for the first time on The Royal Princess, October 27th, 2016 which will be over Halloween. Does anyone have any information if The Royal Princess does a Halloween Costume Party, or do folks even dress up?

We love to bring costumes and have looked forward to other cruise lines Halloween parties. Can't find any information about Halloween though on Princess sailings.

Thanks!

 

Thanks guys for "clinching" Vibe for us. Have been back and forth on Vibe passes ever since we booked last September. However, can't pass up a few cocktails with such amiable cruisers as yourselves. Hoping we get that chance. :) Regards Gerry

Looking forward to meeting you!!!!!

I did call and they told me at the time I booked it, the promotions came with the guarantee mini suite, so I was lucky at the time I booked...

See, I am so happy for you that it was included at the time you booked. YAY!

How I miss cruising with you guys!

Lunch on a ship is never, ever the same without you and Darrell. Miss you lots!

JW and Jerome

So excited to read your review. I loved the Escape. Cruised it's first TA. Sean is the most amazing Hotel Director at Sea.

 

My sister, son and I were on your ill fated Epic Cruise. My sister had the Birthday Cake Hat. You guys were so much fun, you didn't really let on about all the issues you had.

 

February 11 if you dare try the Epic again, but I'm thinking it's not the ship for you.

 

Enjoy which ever cruise you decide on. Hope to be on a sailing with you guys again some day. You all are so much fun!

Deborah, of course we remember you! "Martini's make my clothes fall off!" I still wear that shirt often, except not lately, as JW has increased his poundage, but I will be back in it in no time!:o

Were you part of the "50 Shades of Gay" Thanksgiving Dinner (80 of in The Manhattan Room) when they had no Turkey left and made us wait 40 minutes for chicken? That was really the icing on the EPIC Cake.

Thankfully, The Escape was Ah-May-Zing! We are back on Norwegian. Love it!

Great hearing from you again. Thanks.

JW

No Problem!

There is a serious side to me as well, and when it comes to Guest Relations and Guest Satisfaction, after 35 years, I am a Marriott Guru and know how to read and understand a Guest very well. That's why I always say, it's not about how I am treated on a cruise, the cruise lines will bend over backwards for me because of our reputation and following, it is how well YOU are treated, as I watch with great detail, as if I am at work, everything that is happening with others around me.

A successful cruise for me, is a successful cruise for the other Guest's around me. I can't help it. It is my nature to see to others satisfaction. If I see deficiencies around me that happen to someone else, then they are going to happen to me soon enough as well.

I don't miss a detail or trick. This is why I am most impressed with NCL and the changes that Andy Stewart has made to the culture. It has to come from the top. I can feel the energy and excitement, and the willingness of the Crew to make the Guest feel welcome.

That being said, there is one phrase in the Guest Service industry that erks me to no end. It makes me so frustrated to hear. It is the phrase "No Problem". If I am ONLY in Jamaica, Man, then I accept No Problem as an answer, but only in Jamaica.

However, the mere mention of that phrase as an answer to a Guest Request, means to the Guest that there "Would" be a problem normally, and You, the Guest, ARE inconveniencing me, but I am paid to alleviate YOUR problem. Thus, "No Problem".

If one is conditioned to say No Problem, as it is habitual in so many areas of Guest Service, then I would suggest a reconditioning of ones self to say "No Worries" to replace the awfully incorrect, and, quite frankly, demeaning to the Guest, phrase of No Problem.

Case in point on Norwegian. I know from our travels on The EPIC, the phrase over and over and over to any request was constantly No Problem, No Problem, and yet, there were problems and they were not solved. I kept mentioning it to Jerome, that all I heard everywhere was NO PROBLEM. "Can I have a drink?" "No Problem". "Can I please have a towel?" "No Problem". "I have a flood in my cabin". "No Problem". "It' a Thanksgiving Cruise, what do you mean you are out of Turkey?" "No Problem, we are making chicken and it will be ready in 40 minutes". That phrase makes me feel as if I could be a problem for just asking for something.

Now on the other hand, taking liberty from Adrian Bica's (The magnificent Haven Concierge) playbook, if I were to ask Adrian any request, I would be met with the following: "Yes" Sir, "It Will Be My Pleasure" Sir, "Consider it Done" Sir, "What Else Can I Do For You to Insure Your Satisfaction, Sir?", never does he say No Problem because The Guest IS NOT A Problem.

Think about that for a moment and think how many times we might hear the words NO PROBLEM to a request we have made in a day. Or we might say it unconsciously, not understanding the implications.

If Adrian cannot give an answer immediately to a request, he will say, "I will look into it for you, sir and will get back to you in (makes a commitment of time as he understands that my time is valuable) such-n-such minutes/hour/immediately".

We noticed that on this Norwegian Escape sailing, the culture has been expanded from the Concierge to the Crew. I barely heard "No Problem" coming from the Crew on this ship, however, I still did heard it occasionally and it still erks me because I haven't GOT NO Problem! What I did hear most often was "My Pleasure", "Thank You", "Your Welcome", and "May I, Would I, Could I, What can I....(do for you to please Me, the Guest)"

I saw no looks, no scours, no rolling of the eyes, no back alley criticism of the Guest. I watched with glee as the Crew understood Guest Service. I saw Servers, Maitre'd's and Hosts spring into action to anticipate potential Guest issues and resolving them before they became an issue.

Once such case in point was at breakfast one morning in Taste. We were seated on a balcony by the window and another couple was sitting at a deuce (restaurant lingo for table for two) in the middle of the room. A very long table was set for a big group against the wall, behind the couple seated. Then, this group of 12 come in, and proceed to the table, stickler is, they had 5 girls, FIVE little girls. It was a huge family. Even though the girls were very, very well behaved (Surprisingly good table manners too), the scowl on the face of the woman seated close by the children was evident to everyone in the room. You could just see the future complaint of "How Aghast and It's A Travesty" coming from her face. I know that type.

I mentioned to Jerome, "Uh Oh", "There is going to be an issue with this woman". "She is going to explode because of being seated next to all those children".

At the same time, the Maitre' D saw her face too, FROM ACROSS THE ROOM, and literally leaps into action. Before the scowling Guest knew what was happening, and before she could even think about complaining, the Matre'd sprang to the table and announced that he was immediately relocating the couple to a table by the window and had three or four servers there to gather up all their food items.

I was impressed. Very impressed. What could she say? "No?" "I want to stay here an wallow in my misery just to be happy to complain later to Guest Relations?" She was not given the chance. (There are people like that, who LOVE to complain about everything, and perhaps she may have been one of them, but not this time.) This "Professional" earned his stripes on his white uniform by completely being aware of his dining room and completely understanding his Guest. Great Job!

Again, it is not how we were served, which was beyond exceptional, it was how the other Guest's I witnessed were treated and served. This is one of the monumental reasons why this Norwegian Escape sailing was considered Our Best Cruise Ever. They "Get" what it means to provide excellent Guest Service and we saw it practiced everywhere on the ship. It's not contrived, it is genuine, and we felt the Crew honestly wants to participate in the Guest satisfaction experience with a 100% commitment.

Were there challenges? Heck yes, I saw plenty. Were they resolved? For the most part, and what I witnessed and then later, subsequently interviewed Guests about their situations, I say emphatically yes, they were pleased with the resolutions. Everyone that I talked to was incredibly surprised at the proactive culture on The Escape to their needs.

My Professional Philosophical Motto that I teach my staff has always been: "It doesn't matter if The Guest spends $9 or $9,000, the Service and Guest Experience needs to be the exact same, always".

I felt the Crew of The Norwegian Escape is an excellent example of this philosophy, "on this particular sailing".

Now back to the fun!

I don't get that, we booked a guaranteed mini suite and also got the promo dining and drinking I'm confused

You know I saw that post too, and it is actually completely up to NCL, the parameters with which you booked, whether or not it was an incentive/promotion for you to book, or whether you booked an inside cabin and moved up to a Mini-Suite Guarantee.

However, the OP is correct in saying what they did.

If I try to book any kind of a "Guarantee Cabin" now from the website, it will specifically state that I am NOT eligible for any promotions in consideration of the lower cost.

If I were already booked in, say, a Balcony cabin and I upgraded to a Mini-Suite Guarantee category, then I am still permitted the incentives and promotions I was given when I purchased a Balcony category.

But that is not always the case as I have seen. Booking through an off price agent such as the Airline Employee Rate company Interline, or other regular discount websites, I have seen that the incentives and promotions are still included in their bookings.

So ultimately, you both are right per se. There are parameters.

Agreed. I did think however that it was a pretty sad statement on my social life as I waited for this latest installment last night. :D

How funny! Yes, it takes me a couple of hours to write a chapter and I will keep pumping them out as long as my vodka holds out! We have so many Escapades and I enjoy recapping them and if I enjoy them, I know others will too.

So here Jerome and I are, through the triple doors on deck 8, peeping down our corridor where our cabin is, not a housekeeping cart in sight, but I am getting school kid nervous (and I have to Tinkle too) because there are so many Crew Members coming and going.

Oh I see now, as I am walking towards our cabin, there is a Crew Door midway down the hall. New Crew Cabins have been added on our deck, I get it! Everyone we pass is looking directly at us saying "Hello", "Welcome Aboard", don't they know that it is just noon and "We" are not allowed to be here, let alone toting our carry-ons down the corridor. Bad JW, Bad!

So we get to cabin 8120, "Well" I say, "Here goes". I slide the room key card in the slot and ooooh chills and thrills go up and down my spine. A green light! It's happening, it's finally happening! Yay! I have to Tinkle soooo bad.

I run into the room, take a quick glance, open the bathroom door, grabbing my pants button and having my pants half way down already, (I said I really had to Tinkle), and crapola..............no lights. I am in the dark. I turn the light switch off and on, off and on, come on already, I hasappbad! Like a Pirate I scream RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Jerome, as usual, the cool and collected Flyboy, walks briskly past me and into the room, pushing me into the bathroom and almost closing the door on me, and thank goodness I have good aim, placing the carry-ons on the bed and calmly states that there needs to be a room key or card key in the slot to activate the lights.

"I ain't got time for that!" So, meanie that he is, as I am in the dark Tinkling, Oh goodness, I really had to go, I hear him open the balcony door and scream back at me, "Holy Crap JW!" "Look at the size of this balcony!"

Dagnabit Jerome! I am so excited that I almost decide to forgo continuing in the John and just become a fire hose and spray the whole dang cabin until I got to the balcony! "Dagnit Jerome", I thought, "I wanted to see the balcony too, couldn't you have waited for me?" Come on JW, finish, hurry!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....I have to get to the balcony! Then, finally, I had a fabulous musical thought come to me at that very moment, KC and The Sunshine Band singing "Shake, Shake Shake!" "Shake, Shake Shake!" (Okay, some of you will get it and some will still say what the heck is he talking about?).

I pressed the button on the wall for the Johnny and nothing. Pressed again, nothing. Then all of the sudden, seconds delay................WHOOSH! Dang nearly took me along with it. I felt the rush of the wind. (What is with me today and song lyrics?) Talk about a delay in the flush capacitor (Back to the Future License, thank you)....goodness gracious me.

"I'm coming, I coming!" I screamed to Jerome and he was already on the balcony and the door was closed so he couldn't hear me anyway. I get to the door, look around really quick and then say to myself, "Wow, Nice room!", I grab the balcony handle and just like Zsa Zsa Gabor in The Green Acres opening number (You have to be old enough) slid open the door and said to Jerome "New York is where I'd rather be" and he says sarcastically to me, "But 'cha aren't Blanche, ya aren't in New Yawk, You's on The Noweegeean Es-Caw-Pay." That's how we pronounce the Escape............Es-Caw-Pay. Kind of chishe fah fah isn't it?

Oh my goodness. Ah-May-Zing to the third power. This balcony, pardon the Trumpism, is HUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGE!

There is a full size round dining table and two regular chairs. Two full size chaise loungers. A side table. And the balcony is the same size as the living area of the Mini-Suite. Wowza. No wonder they call these the Secret Mini Suites. Yes, and they cost a pretty penny too, but you know what? They be worth every penny.

Of course, I wouldn't be "JW" if I didn't turn around and look up, at everyone, as they all can see us on the balcony, and yell "Yoo Hoo!" to everyone while I give gigantic waves (and thank gosh I learned to wear clothes in the morning before going out to the rail on the balcony. That goes back to the Norwegian Dawn in '09 when I walk casually out to the front of the ship on our balcony first thing in the morning in my tightie whities, {I was much thinner then and really cute} as we were coming into St Thomas. There were hoots, cat calls and hollers from above and I turned around and saw a ship full of passengers and the Captain on the Bridge, waving and whistling at me. OH MY GAWD. Needless to say, JW, thankfully, is always fully presentable now, when going on a balcony)

In any event, I guess there were several more folks that decided to just go to their rooms like us.

"Oh My Living Lord!" I screamed "Jerome!" "There is someone in the room!" Jerome sprang to the balcony door and there were three Crew Members (okay, my heart started pounding, I thought the jig was up and we waz in big troubles) but they were just there to deliver lots of amenities. Oh Crapola. They know. I did everything possible to throw them off the scent that it was Cruiseguys on the sailing. We booked and paid in Jerome's name, all the reservations were such. We stayed off of Cruise Critic deliberately as well as the Roll Call. We booked four days before we sailed. Drats. I have been discovered, and now I am, what I call my new catch phrase: being "Gambee-ized."

Here came a parade of Bon Voyage amenities. Lots of Chocolate Covered Strawberries, or CCS from now on, a Bottle of red wine, a Fruit Bowl and a plate of Canapes. We thank the crew members for presenting these to us and I give them a tip, of course, and off they went and I proceeded to look at the gift cards. Dagnabit, I am found out. Last thing I wanted was for NCL to know I had returned.

NCL was bound and determined to make this cruise RIGHT AND PERFECT.

First, there is a Welcome Aboard card from The Hotel Director, Sean Whatshimgalgheimerstaidershultz, (Not his real name but I asked over and over how to say it and that is all I could come up with after 8 martini's). I'ts actually spelled Wurmhoeringer. Then a Mr. Lester from Guest Relations sent us a bottle of Vino and the Fruit Bowl. The Food and Beverage Director, Mr Martin Ivanov (From Barcelona, Spain and really, really Handsome) sent us Canapes and CCS. Another plate CCS from Christina Bica, our fabulous Casino Host, and our prepaid 6 large bottles of Aquafina.

There is, so far before we have sailed, a total of 18 Chocolate Covered Strawberries, 6 each on three different plates. Really? And dozens more to come each day throughout the cruise. I loved it. Really. It was hysterical to see, later on the cruise, a one time delivery of 7 stacked CCS in just one afternoon. Is there any other amenity they have except Chocolate Covered Strawberries? I really appreciate it, but.........we much rather would have enjoyed the canapes. The amazing and kind gestures were fun and I mentioned it to Sean W and we will laugh about it, together with Martin, in a few days. More on that later on.

Then, it's 1PM and our luggage arrives. Oh my gosh, that is the first time ever that our luggage arrives before sailing. Cool.

At this point, Jerome kicks me out of the room, as I am not allowed to be in the room when he is unpacking and organizing on the first day, or, on the last night when he is packing to go home. I drive him nuts, I guess. I drive most people nuts, I suppose. But who cares.

Off Trouble goes to have a Martini or three at Tobacco Road, which is about 100 steps from the door to our hallway from our cabin. Schweet.

More to come this afternoon and this evening.

Just an FYI to everyone, here is our upcoming cruise schedule confirmed so far:

August 20, 2016: 8 Night Norwegian ESCAPE, Recap sailing

October 27, 2016: 10 Night Royal Princess Halloween Cruise

December 31, 2016: 7 Night Carnival Conquest New Years Eve

I know that we will be scheduled for a Norwegian sailing in February or March, and I also want to go on the Norwegian Sky somewhere in there too , for a three/four day booze cruz.

Any suggestions? Who is sailing in February/March? You know that I have to get to Golden Level in the Casino by March 31st.

My wife and I have sailed with JW and Jerome and they were absolutely a blast to hang out with and talk to. There were many times we sat around and watched them (mainly JW) gamble and we laughed the entire time. I already miss the laughs...and maybe down the road we can connect again on another cruise! Until then I can't wait to read the rest of the review and especially the follow up review as we look to book our next cruise on the Escape in the near future.

AWWWW. Now only if they knew who you are.............more to come my friend, more to come!

JW--we have cabin 8730 (starboard side) on Escape this Sept. I was wondering why you say it is easier to get to "port" cabins in the M6 category?

It is not a straight shot to your cabin. If you watch my video, once I am through the second door and standing in front of The District, then, to get to your cabin, you would turn right and go down the hall and then make a left at the entrance of Food Republic. Then go through the doorway and that would lead to your cabin, and at the end of your hallway, all the inside cabins can be reached that way as well. Yours is still a secret cabin, but I think even more secret as no one knows just how to actually get there except you, once you are there!

They changed the floor plan from what is on the NCL Escape website as there is a "Crew" door now at the end of the Port Hallway, just after our cabins and no access to the Starboard passenger cabins from that side. You can see that in our video, it's the door just beyond where the Room Steward is working. At one time we could go all the way around from Port to Starboard. Now the access is "Crew" access only.

Ahhhh. The beautiful and gorgeous VIBE, the Jacuzzi, the Bar and some of the Chaise Lounges. First thing in the morning. Fabulous!

Oh man, how I wish I hadn't seen this yet!!!

It's so hard reading "as it comes out, post by post".... Now I have to WAIT.

And I don't wait very well :(

 

So I will go watch your video 5 more times :)

Nice hearing from you again. We go way back to the old Bahamas Celebration days, years and years ago.

One thing these Boys of VIBE did the very best, was heap loads of attention onto us, their Guests. Plus, to all future VIBE Guests, ya'all need to be present for Shot O'Clock everyday at 4pm. That's when the action at VIBE really takes place.

Thank you Suresh, Rommel, Roberto and Reinzi, our very special VIBE Beach Club Team. There were others who were great too, but these are our boys! Love My Little "Minion" too!

If you're a person who opens up once someone's not a 'stranger' anymore, Vibe is great.

That is a brilliant response! Love it!

Thanks for sharing your experiences on the Escape. I will be sailing on the Escape next May and will be only my second cruise; My first being over 25 years ago on the old Carnivale with Carnival Cruise. Next years cruise will be the first time in 10 years we did not go to Walt Disney World and we are looking forward to this cruise. I love that you were in cabin 8120 and shared it on You tube. We will be in the cabin right next to yours in cabin 8122 and you have given us the the best view of what we will be experiencing. Thank you. :)

You will absolutely love 8122. The Port side is much easier to get to than on the Starboard side on deck 8. We are in 8122 on the August 20, 2016 sailing. Looking forward to letting you know that experience on our recap of that sailing.

Unlike you, I'm very quiet and reserved. Do you think the Vibe pass would be necessary for me if, like you, I'm not going to use the pool/hot tub/whatever and we have a large balcony.

 

I'm really trying to strategize how to make this the best cruise ever. :D

 

I've already sent the link to your video and copied and pasted a bunch of your Escape posts to my traveling companion. Thanks for the time spent writing and all the detail.

VIBE has a great bar, great camaraderie and a special bonding with the other guest's, it can be quiet and reserved if you like or you can have fun and join in. Each cruise is different. There are many features to Vibe, but the best is that if I wanted, I could have curled up with a cocktail and a good book. The service is exceptional and I was brought fresh fruit, cold towels, ice water and cocktails round the clock. There is even a special menu to order food from if I wanted.

But if you have one of the Extra Large Balcony Mini Suites on Deck 8, then there is ample room to relax and enjoy the comfort and peace on the balcony instead.

I liked VIBE because we had the drink package, the folks we met were fun and outstanding, the service was wonderful and it was an exclusive enclave and I felt special. I certainly got my money's worth.