How to deal with offensive behavior?

[mousecrazy]

While researching my upcoming Sun cruise, I came across many reviews of an October cruise where many complained of offensive (i.e. obscene) behavior. Many posts/reviews stated they complained to ship's personnel and nothing was done. I find this troublesome. I am traveling with my young children and find it irresponsible and unacceptable for the ship's staff to allow obscene behavior in a public area (most of the complaints involved the pool area, in fact, one involved the CHILDREN'S pool).

 

I understand I can leave the area to avoid this type of thing. But I'm interested in hearing other options. Isn't there security on the ship? Which officer is responsible for the pool area?

[Sauer-kraut]

Are you refering to the LGTB group cruise?

 

That was a one off, and if you are so worried I would check the specialty cruises boards to see if you are on a similar sailing. If you attend your sailing's meet & greet you will meet the upper management and then you will have a direct number to the security or hotel supervisor for your concerns.

 

I am a bit more relaxed about stuff like that, and I don't have children so my opinion is quite a bit different from yours. However, if the children are young enough any lewd behaviour will probably be over their heads anyways.

[yoyocruiser]

I would like to reassure you a bit. While I am sure that these instances occur of which people complain, I want to say that I do not find that this is the type of behavior that one often sees--especially in the daytime and in family areas. I have been on many cruises and it is really rare. But as with anything--you could HAPPEN to wonder onto the wrong cruise or the wrong place at the wrong time. Thsi happens on airplanes, boats, trains, hotels, sporting events, and public venues in general. I mean--there are rude people in the world. I find that these boards often fill up with the bad experiences--because by nature people want a place to complain. And I am not saying the complaints are not valid. I only bring it up so that you realize that it does not mean that all cruise ships are jsut totally full of rude offensive people.

 

That said, I traveled extensively with my children, and I found that there were commons sense things that helped. I generally stayed away from the pool area in the height of the day--it was much more crowded and also more difficult to supervise my children. We took advantage of the pool in the mornings until lunch. I also used the opportunity to point out rude or offensive behavior to my children as part of their learning process. And at times you do need to simply get up and leave--sure you shouldn't have to, but seriously, why exhaust yourself with making a point. There's lots of great places to go on a ship. You don't need to hang out with the offensive crowd. And who wants to play police on vacation?

 

The suggestion to attend the meet and greet was an excellent one--then you will know who to contact if there are recurring issues. The staff are lovely and they want you to be happy. I don't believe there is one particular officer in charge of the pool area. There is security, but in general they don't tend to intervene except in safety related issues.

 

I will only say that I have read an equal number of concerns about the poor behavior of children on cruises--LOL--I'm sure you are aware that there are a lot of cruisers or just people in general that abhor children, especially children on vacation!! :D I just throw this out there because it highlights the need for everyone to be considerate and respectful of others.

 

In summary, I think you will have a great cruise. The cruise ship is a micro-cosm of the world. You will run into some rude people and have to deal with it. But you will also run into lovely people who are just trying to have a nice vacation like yourself. Don't go expecting to find a lot of issues, or guarantee, you will find them. You and your children are msot fortunate to ahve this wonderful vacation ahead of you.

[mousecrazy]

Thanks for the opinions. I have cruised before, so I know that what happened on that October cruise was a one off. However, it did make me wonder why so many people complained and nothing was done...in fact, it sounds like the lewd behavior worsened as the cruise went on. I find it troubling that a "few" were allowed to continue on without someone in a position of authority stepping in to intervene on behalf of the "many." I guess that's the age we live in...sigh.

[newmexicoNita]

Thanks for the opinions. I have cruised before, so I know that what happened on that October cruise was a one off. However, it did make me wonder why so many people complained and nothing was done...in fact, it sounds like the lewd behavior worsened as the cruise went on. I find it troubling that a "few" were allowed to continue on without someone in a position of authority stepping in to intervene on behalf of the "many." I guess that's the age we live in...sigh.

 

again, was this the LGTB cruise? It is important for those who can be sensitive to others behavior to check and see if there are any groups who have chartered a large part of the ship before booking. I know this isn't easy, but it can be done.

 

I understand how you feel, you have to understand even if behavior isn't what you call acceptable, the cruise line's hands are pretty well tied.

 

Do rest assured, it is rare to see such behavior. Most of the time people cruising are respectful (not always I would add) and use decent judgement.

 

Nita

[A1SusieQ]

I am interested...Is it a group that performs lewd acts in public?:eek:

 

Thanks, Susan

[bryanjaync]

I have travelled with several LGBT group on cruises in the past. At least from my perspective (being gay), I witnessed no lewd behavior BUT I was not the cruise you mention, so cannot comment on that behavior in particular.

 

BUT, the general rule I live by is......if a straight person/couple can do it, then I can. And yes, that does mean holding hands, kissing, hugging. But no, in my standards, it does not mean making out (straight or gay). Some may consider such public displays of affection as lewd when done by a LGBT couple, but not a straight couple. Tsk tsk.

 

I use the same 'yardstick' for behavior for everyone.

[newmexicoNita]

I have travelled with several LGBT group on cruises in the past. At least from my perspective (being gay), I witnessed no lewd behavior BUT I was not the cruise you mention, so cannot comment on that behavior in particular.

 

BUT, the general rule I live by is......if a straight person/couple can do it, then I can. And yes, that does mean holding hands, kissing, hugging. But no, in my standards, it does not mean making out (straight or gay). Some may consider such public displays of affection as lewd when done by a LGBT couple, but not a straight couple. Tsk tsk.

 

I use the same 'yardstick' for behavior for everyone.

 

i would probably agree with you, but I think there are 2 issues: 1-so many are so downright prejudice they would make mountians out of molehills and any form of affection 2 people of the same sex might show in public, especially if there were several couples on board might bother families with young children. I am certainly not judging, I am simply explaining how many might have felt. I also agree with you on the public display, infact that is what I am saying.

 

Nita

[Mr. Luckytoo]

If you attend your sailing's meet & greet you will meet the upper management and then you will have a direct number to the security or hotel supervisor for your concerns.

 

 

Excellent advice and something I would HIGHLY recommend. In the past I hadn't attended these meetings and if a problem occurred it was a hit/miss. However since attending the meet & greet I've not only had a chance to meet fellow CC'ers but some of the officers who are only too anxious to alleviate any problems/concerns you may have.

 

I recently completed a cruise on the Sun before it went into drydock and I didn't see anything untoward. I'm sure you'll have a wonderful time. :)

[Mr. Luckytoo]

i would probably agree with you, but I think there are 2 issues: 1-so many are so downright prejudice they would make mountians out of molehills and any form of affection 2 people of the same sex might show in public, especially if there were several couples on board might bother families with young children. I am certainly not judging, I am simply explaining how many might have felt. I also agree with you on the public display, infact that is what I am saying.

 

Nita

 

Sometime's it's got nothing to do with predjudice but standards - take Marti Gras in New Orleans as an example. I've been to the N.O. Halloween parade and it was family friendly and a wonderful time.

 

However during Marti Gras women flashing breasts for beads - not something I would take/want my young children experiencing. Nevertheless other people think that it's just plain harmless fun....:rolleyes:

[newmexicoNita]

Sometime's it's got nothing to do with predjudice but standards - take Marti Gras in New Orleans as an example. I've been to the N.O. Halloween parade and it was family friendly and a wonderful time.

 

However during Marti Gras women flashing breasts for beads - not something I would take/want my young children experiencing. Nevertheless other people think that it's just plain harmless fun....:rolleyes:

 

you are right, i was simply saying, sometimes it is prejudice and sometimes yes, either standards or feeling you want to protect your family. Again, I am judging or attempting to flame anyone, I see both sides. We are going on the Spirit Feb 20th. The first Marti Gras parade will be the night before, we will be in NOLA, but will not go to the parade. our 4 year old great granddaughter will be with us, I don't think the parade would be considered family friendly, that is for sure. I will add, I do hope some, from our cruise that go will take pics so we can see them. LOL , yes lots of smiles, I have to admit.

 

Nita

[NMLady]

I am interested...Is it a group that performs lewd acts in public?:eek:

 

Thanks, Susan

 

NO, LGTB is NOT a group that performs lewd acts in public.

It stands for Lesbian, Gay, Transexual, Bisexual.

Sadly, just like any group there are a few who don't know how to behave.

I was on that October cruise with my husband (I'm not LGTB) and I must say that most of that group conducted themselves in proper ways. It was a very few who did not conduct themselves properly, especially around the pools.

 

To the OP, that behavior is rarely seen so shouldn't be a problem for you with your child.

[rjm11]

I have travelled with several LGBT group on cruises in the past. At least from my perspective (being gay), I witnessed no lewd behavior BUT I was not the cruise you mention, so cannot comment on that behavior in particular.

 

BUT, the general rule I live by is......if a straight person/couple can do it, then I can. And yes, that does mean holding hands, kissing, hugging. But no, in my standards, it does not mean making out (straight or gay). Some may consider such public displays of affection as lewd when done by a LGBT couple, but not a straight couple. Tsk tsk.

 

I use the same 'yardstick' for behavior for everyone.

 

Very well said!!!! I wasn't onboard and have no idea what the "lewd behavior" actually was, but I certainly hope it wasn't just two same-sex adults showing some affection! That's NOT lewd, people! (and for the record, I have 2 small children, and would NOT be upset in the least for them to see that)

 

however, if there was lewd behavior from ANY couple (in my book this would mean groping, flashing, serious making out, etc) I would be disappointed if NCL ignored my concerns about it.

[sparks1093]

While researching my upcoming Sun cruise, I came across many reviews of an October cruise where many complained of offensive (i.e. obscene) behavior. Many posts/reviews stated they complained to ship's personnel and nothing was done. I find this troublesome. I am traveling with my young children and find it irresponsible and unacceptable for the ship's staff to allow obscene behavior in a public area (most of the complaints involved the pool area, in fact, one involved the CHILDREN'S pool).

 

I understand I can leave the area to avoid this type of thing. But I'm interested in hearing other options. Isn't there security on the ship? Which officer is responsible for the pool area?

 

It is my understanding that all public areas on the ship are covered by cameras and someone from security is monitoring them.

[Medtech2]

i have travelled with several lgbt group on cruises in the past. At least from my perspective (being gay), i witnessed no lewd behavior but i was not the cruise you mention, so cannot comment on that behavior in particular.

 

But, the general rule i live by is......if a straight person/couple can do it, then i can. And yes, that does mean holding hands, kissing, hugging. But no, in my standards, it does not mean making out (straight or gay). Some may consider such public displays of affection as lewd when done by a lgbt couple, but not a straight couple. Tsk tsk.

 

I use the same 'yardstick' for behavior for everyone.

totally!!

[terrymtex01]

I have travelled with several LGBT group on cruises in the past. At least from my perspective (being gay), I witnessed no lewd behavior BUT I was not the cruise you mention, so cannot comment on that behavior in particular.

 

BUT, the general rule I live by is......if a straight person/couple can do it, then I can. And yes, that does mean holding hands, kissing, hugging. But no, in my standards, it does not mean making out (straight or gay). Some may consider such public displays of affection as lewd when done by a LGBT couple, but not a straight couple. Tsk tsk.

 

I use the same 'yardstick' for behavior for everyone.

 

I am some what in agreement with you here. I realize I am a very conservative gay person, but "making out" is just uncomfortable to me in public I don't care who is doing it.

 

i would probably agree with you, but I think there are 2 issues: 1-so many are so downright prejudice they would make mountians out of molehills and any form of affection 2 people of the same sex might show in public, especially if there were several couples on board might bother families with young children. I am certainly not judging, I am simply explaining how many might have felt. I also agree with you on the public display, infact that is what I am saying.

 

Nita

 

Before anyone says anything towards Nita.. I'm going to say I know full well she did not mean anything by asking if it was the LGBT cruise, other than trying to find out what exactly the OP was talking about. Nita is a doll and I have never seen her say anything bad about any group of people.

[terrymtex01]

OP.. as you and others have said, what happened on that cruise is "unique". I can tell you I don't remember ever having any issues with seeing anything lewd on any cruise we have been on, and if parents would find it offensive for their children to see, I probably would be offened as well.

 

You will love the Sun.. She is a beautiful and unique NCL ship and her crew is wonderful. 8-)

[newmexicoNita]

thanks Terry,

 

I certainly didn't mean anything about gays and lesbians, if I said it in a way someone might have misunderstood lord knows I am sorry. I have gay bosses (who I adore, that is why I still work), I have many gay clients and our wonderful foster daughter is a lesbian. She and her partner are taking another cruise with us next month. I would be the last person to make negative comments about gays.

 

Nita

[faymuiheng]

Hi all,

 

I've also had the pleasure of meeting Nita at one of the cruise critic meetings she arranged on the Pearl to Alaska. She's sweet , genuine, and adoreable. I want to be like her when I grow up. :)

[rjm11]

I didn't get the impression from these posts that Nita was calling any sort of behavior lewd... I was concerned that those who were complaining about the Sun LGBT cruise were equating same sex affection with lewd behavior.

[NMLady]

I didn't get the impression from these posts that Nita was calling any sort of behavior lewd... I was concerned that those who were complaining about the Sun LGBT cruise were equating same sex affection with lewd behavior.

 

What happened on the Sun, in the pool areas, was definitely not same sex affection. Using the word 'lewd' for the pool area behavior might be a bit strong, but it was very definitely offensive, having nothing to do with showing affection.

[erdoran]

I'm not cruising with kids, but i really hope that it doesn't happen on my cruise because I don't want to watch any couple doing things that belong somewhere private. I don't care whether it's same sex or heterosexual couples, that has nothing to do with it. It's just rude and disrespectful to the rest of the pax on the ship and I can't believe staff didn't put a stop to it. It's not like whatever couple(s) didn't have a cabin to go to!