Have to cancel son's reservation b/o sports!

[alys12]

:mad: My son is a freshman in HS and happily made the baseball team only to find out he would be CUT if he cruised with us during spring break next week. He would miss 3 games and practice daily...so unfair! plus I did not purchase insurance so lost $$!!

[imlulu]

WOW!!!

 

As a Mom, I would take him on the cruise if it meant losing his fare particularly as he is only a freshman.

 

 

My 18 yr old ds has decided to stay home on our upcoming cruise. However, he is supposed to be getting a job. We shall see if that happens.:rolleyes:

[llachance]

him on the cruise. As a parent you can explain to the coach what the priorities are - family - and if the coach doesn't agree then I wouldn't have my child on the team anyway.

[cardinalfan]

I would think there could be some rules about this at his high school. Spring break is spring break and I would call the coach.

[salukigrl]

Call the coach directly! Our kids eat, breath, and live sports (DD is a four-sport athlete, DS two). They rarely miss practice/games, but we have had a few important family conflicts along the way. A vacation that has been planned, budgeted for and anticipated for months (DURING SPRING BREAK) should be excused!

[alys12]

Yes, i think a call to the coach is in order...i thought spring break was spring break too but apparently i was wrong. :confused:

[jenwales]

This isn't little league, it's high school sports. If you meddle, it will affect your son. Let him decide - cruise or baseball. It's time for mom to step back.

 

I have to schedule around my DS's schedule. I hate it, but thems the breaks.

[forwardcabin]

Well, you do what you want, but coaches have a way getting their way in the end. We know, because our son is a high school baseball coach. Last March, we wanted to go on a spring break cruise. Our DD wanted to go and take her two girls, one of which plays HS softball. They all went on the cruise even tho our DGDs coach wanted her to stay for practice and scheduled spring break games. We had a great time on the cruise, but she had to do a lot of running and other stuff as punishment for missing spring break practice and games. She's probably lucky she didn't get cut altogether. This year, we purposely did not plan a spring break cruise.

[michiganredrose]

I think the coach should have made this clear during try-outs but I also think your son needs to make a decision. My son plays football and baseball, for us that means we travel in the winter. Missing a few practices wouldn't have him off the team but missing 3 games definitely would.

[alligirl78]

Ooooh no....I'd be on the phone with that coach in a heartbeat. That is ridiculous. Not being judgemental, but I personally couldn't afford to cancel a trip like this for a frosh baseball team. That simply wouldn't be an option in my house. Talk to the coach, and the school...and then take your vacation!;)

[Martini Mom]

him on the cruise. As a parent you can explain to the coach what the priorities are - family - and if the coach doesn't agree then I wouldn't have my child on the team anyway.

I agree. Family first! Also, this sound like last minute notice being given to the parents. It's not just a cruise, it's memories made as a family.

[jenjens1023]

When DD was in high school, doing three sports and marching band competitions, we decided that some parts of life would be on hold for four years until she went to college. There were many family vacation times we missed because we were having family times at her events. In the end I'm glad we did it that way, but it's a tough call.

[lkva]

My DH in a head high school football coach and he gets calls that kids are not able to make practices, conditioning, camps and 2 days for family functions and trips. He have never penalized a player for family planned activities! Just a simple email or call to discuss the circumstances and the money that you have put out hopefully he will understand.

 

I guess you have to ask your son how he feels about you making that type of call. Some teenage boys don't like it too much when their parents intervene. Even though you just love them and want to help.

 

Good Luck and hopefully it will work out for everyone!

[KenMo]

What does your son want to do?

 

If he'd rather go on the cruise knowing he would be cut, then let him cruise.

 

If he'd rather stay on the team maybe there's someone he could stay with while the rest of the family cruised so you wouldn't lose all the money.

 

But yes, the coach should have made this type of thing known from the beginning.

[room010]

We all know that coaches can be a little, ahem, "focussed" on their own priorities to the exclusion of everything else but more or less blackmailing your son to effectively choose between his family vacation and The Team is pretty mean and petty and I wouldn't hesitate to tell Mr Coach exactly that, especially if you are going to lose money over the whole thing.

[llachance]

the parent? Just saying. Unless he has stood out in baseball previously he isn't going to be missed by the big league scouts during spring break. As a freshman in HS you are still in charge even though you don't seem to think so. As the parent you make this decision and if the coach doesn't like it then tough. That said, in the future, I would probably understand the consequences of sports in HS and how they affect your family life. When my daughter's basketball coach, in HS, said the rule was team, school family, I had no problem letting her quit and this was the first time ever, she had played sports up to then. She is now a senior in college, raising her son, she and her husband own their house...it works out in the end.

[alligirl78]

This isn't little league, it's high school sports. If you meddle, it will affect your son. Let him decide - cruise or baseball. It's time for mom to step back.

 

I have to schedule around my DS's schedule. I hate it, but thems the breaks.

 

I respectfully disagree. Let my CHILD decide between a cruise or baseball? As the parent, I feel it is my job to make important (esp expensive) family decisions. And the main difference between little league and high school sports? Puberty and that's about it...Unless this team is this child's primary chance of a career or college, 20 yrs from now this team will be equally important as little league. It's time for mom to step back when mom isn't paying the bills anymore. THEMS my breaks...lol. But to each their own, in their own family..

[Martini Mom]

Some teenage boys don't like it too much when their parents intervene. Even though you just love them and want to help.

 

I struggle with this too. It's the mama bear in me. :)

[scottsgal]

We can't travel over spring break because of soph's baseball. They miss games, they don't play and those rules were clearly defined by the varsity coach. We're on spring break right now and have 10 games this week. So if he missed those games he'd miss an additional 10 games when he got back which is over 1/2 their season total missing 20 games. I don't know of a high school in our area that doesn't abide by those rules. Like others have said in the grand scheme of things if he's not looking to play 4 years of HS and college ball like my son is then missing those games won't be the end of the world.

 

Sorry your son has to miss the cruise - he has to choose his priorities. HS ball is a blast, he'll enjoy it!

[lkva]

I struggle with this too. It's the mama bear in me. :)

 

Me too!:)

[laumicmah]

I'm shocked at some of the responses. The boy has a CHOICE... join the team or take the cruise...no one is forcing him to join the team. If he and/or his folks want him to take the cruise, than he'll have to forgo baseball...if he lives for baseball than he would have known the demands of playing on a high school team well before now. It is not fair to his team mates to just cut outon them- for a cruise vacation. My 12 year old DDs play select softball and we plan our family vacations in August...right before school starts back up. My DH is their team manager and he says it really messes up the team practice when girls don't show up, as they need to know how to all work together as a fine-tuned machine. And we're about to play in our first spring tourney(this weekend) and 2 girls just sprung it on us that they won't be able to come. That's unfair to the girls who commit to the team and want to do well in these tourneys. High school ball and select ball is not rec ball...you have to earn a spot on the team and if you can't work hard and do what is expected of you...someone else is waiting to take your spot.

[CruiseAdict218]

I would take him and if hes that good that he made the team this year than hopefully he can make it on the team next year

[jenwales]

I respectfully disagree. Let my CHILD decide between a cruise or baseball? As the parent, I feel it is my job to make important (esp expensive) family decisions. And the main difference between little league and high school sports? Puberty and that's about it...Unless this team is this child's primary chance of a career or college, 20 yrs from now this team will be equally important as little league. It's time for mom to step back when mom isn't paying the bills anymore. THEMS my breaks...lol. But to each their own, in their own family..

 

Yes, let the teenager decide what his priorities are. My son's big thing is music and his performance schedule is way more important (to him) than any vacation. If baseball is the OP's son's passion, I'm betting that working hard and making that team means more to him than a single cruise over spring break. It would probably break his heart to have to give up the sport.

 

If the kid wants to advocate for himself and talk to the coach that's one thing; once a kid is in high school his parents really shouldn't be running interference anymore. IMO, of course.

[Martini Mom]

I'm shocked at some of the responses. The boy has a CHOICE... join the team or take the cruise...no one is forcing him to join the team. If he and/or his folks want him to take the cruise, than he'll have to forgo baseball...if he lives for baseball than he would have known the demands of playing on a high school team well before now. It is not fare to his team mates to just cut out- for a cruise vacation- on them. My 12 year old DDs play select softball and we plan our family vacations in August...right before school starts back up. My DH is their team manager and he says it really messes up the team practice when girls don't show up, as they need to know how to all work together as a fine-tuned machine. And we're about to play in our first spring tourney(this weekend) and 2 girls just sprung it on us that they won't be able to come. That's unfair to the girls who commit to the team and want to do well in these tourneys. High school ball and select ball is not rec ball...you have to earn a spot on the team and if you can't work hard and do what is expected of you...someone else is waiting to take your spot.

My boys have both played football and it's a HUGE time commitment for all of us. We scheduled our family time in July, before the start of pre-season. That was because we knew what we were signing up for before they joined. This scenario sounds like the parents were unaware of the specific commitments. That's not fair.

[jennim]

Welcome to High School Baseball....

I lived on the Baseball field from the time my son was 4 all thru High School. He made Varsity (starting) as a freshmen so I know first hand the dilemma you are going through, we missed and cancel many trips because of sports. (without regret) I read this thread to my son, now 23, to get his response... "Freshman year builds his high school career, If he's serious about BB he needs to play, if not he needs to quit the team". He also said don't call the coach, this is discussed during tryouts, quick way to make a coach really mad.

As a Mom, I feel your pain... but enjoy it while it last :o