Should we abandon the ship?

[Artemis908]

Last night I got a call from a college friend who I've stayed close to, who is flying in for my wedding. His mom, who I've met maybe 3 times, and lives locally, decided she REALLY wanted to come. My wedding is in three days. Since his mother refused to listen to reason from him, she made him call me to ask. I was able to say "sorry, but customs regulations won't allow me to add anyone else at this point." After I hung up the phone I was reminded of your situation, Herbaltees, and had to laugh. Had it been a traditional wedding, I would have had to find a way to get her in, pay more to the caterer, redo my table assignments, etc. Yeah cruise wedding!:D

 

Wow talk about rude. Did she not even stop to think how inconvenient that'd be for you whether or not it was a cruise wedding? Sheesh.

[mrsgomez2011]

Really? That is very helpful info. This really gives me hope!

 

 

 

Yes, you're right. But I also really, really like the idea of the cruise wedding. It's just soo cool and different. The catholic church isn't going anywhere, we can always go back and have a "proper" service in the eyes of the church.

 

 

I guess I'm just freakin out.

 

I had a proper service with communion. I'm not Catholic and it wasn't in a church but it was still with a pastor and all. You can do a lot with a cruise wedding and still have the proper part. :)

[Lisl123]

This is just my opinion - I've watched many weddings on board when there was a public view (lots of people choose the main showroom/theater and anyone can see what is going on from the balcony or through the windows in the showroom. They look rather plain to me, and not very personalized. Last cruise on the Liberty, they had 3 weddings, one right after the other, all in the theater, all with the same decor, same everything. All three were over in a matter of 30 minutes. Guests didn't even get up an leave for each wedding. In a way, it would have been more special had they done it as a group wedding - at least there would have been a story there!

 

I WOULD get married on a ship or at a port during a cruise, but I don't have a large guest list and WOULD want my guests to sail with me. I am also Catholic, but feel like a wedding is a wedding, as long as I have prepared for my big day following the rules of my home parish before the wedding, it isn't really an issue. You can have vows reaffirmed when you return during any mass at most parishes, if you choose to do so. That would be my choice - to include my home parish after the fact, and reaffirm my vows within my faith. So you're married a week as a protestant or just legally ... big deal. LOL

 

For a medium sized wedding of 50-80 guests, all of whom are not going to be guests aboard the ship for sailing - I would say it makes more sense to have the wedding the night before - maybe a reception/wedding venue where you can combine the two events seamlessly. If I were a guest at your wedding, I would be grateful to not have to go through security and coming to a busy port just to attend a brief ceremony with little time to celebrate after the fact. I think you could have a small wedding on land that could be special and to your personal desires ... with 80 guests, you could have a very nice wedding at any club, restaurant or other venue that can be booked for receptions.

 

It just seems like a lot of hassle to have a somewhat personality lacking wedding on the ship with such a large guest list and none of the guests sailing with you. But then, only you know your guests ... will many be excited to be VIP visitors aboard a big ship? Having cruised so often, I guess the luster and excitment of the big ship thing has been a bit lost on me, but I do remember feeling awestruck the first time aboard. If that is the case, your guests might really be thrilled to get the opportunity.

 

Again - just my opinion. I would love to be married on a ship - but my list of invites would be about 10 strong :)

[Lisl123]

After talking with my FH last night, he doesn't want to hear anything about changes. He said what we have is fine and whomever is offended will be offended. But I don't think that's a good way to start combining a family. (Especially since it's not his family who would be on the receiving end. LOL!)

 

 

Ahhh wish I would have read this first ... your FH is a keeper ... he is so right - this is your wedding - if you want a cruise, have a cruise!

[Herbaltees]

This is just my opinion - I've watched many weddings on board when there was a public view (lots of people choose the main showroom/theater and anyone can see what is going on from the balcony or through the windows in the showroom. They look rather plain to me, and not very personalized. Last cruise on the Liberty, they had 3 weddings, one right after the other, all in the theater, all with the same decor, same everything. All three were over in a matter of 30 minutes. Guests didn't even get up an leave for each wedding. In a way, it would have been more special had they done it as a group wedding - at least there would have been a story there!

I didn't know the public would be able to witness the wedding. This sort of freaks me out a bit. For some reason, I thought the rooms would be closed for a private event.

 

I WOULD get married on a ship or at a port during a cruise, but I don't have a large guest list and WOULD want my guests to sail with me. I am also Catholic, but feel like a wedding is a wedding, as long as I have prepared for my big day following the rules of my home parish before the wedding, it isn't really an issue. You can have vows reaffirmed when you return during any mass at most parishes, if you choose to do so. That would be my choice - to include my home parish after the fact, and reaffirm my vows within my faith. So you're married a week as a protestant or just legally ... big deal. LOL

Yes, exactly. We completed the pre cana course so I feel well prepared.

 

For a medium sized wedding of 50-80 guests, all of whom are not going to be guests aboard the ship for sailing - I would say it makes more sense to have the wedding the night before - maybe a reception/wedding venue where you can combine the two events seamlessly.... It just seems like a lot of hassle to have a somewhat personality lacking wedding on the ship with such a large guest list and none of the guests sailing with you. But then, only you know your guests ... will many be excited to be VIP visitors aboard a big ship? Having cruised so often, I guess the luster and excitment of the big ship thing has been a bit lost on me, but I do remember feeling awestruck the first time aboard. If that is the case, your guests might really be thrilled to get the opportunity.

 

:)

 

As a witness to the various weddings, did you really think they were personality lacking/ lack luster events? Most of my guests, with the exception of my children, have never sailed on a cruise ship before. Most have never even seen a cruise ship. Everyone is excited, because they've never even heard of the idea (hence the increase in guests.)

[Herbaltees]

Out of curiosity, how are you wording your invites so people don't think they are invited on the cruise? I for one would assume I could go on the cruise and book right away (most of the cruises in my siggy were for weddings!) and not think twice about it. To me a wedding on a cruise ship = a cruise.

 

I think it was Mrs.Gomez who gave me the idea. She said word it like a regular wedding invitation, with the location being "Carnival Pride, Baltimore, MD"

[Herbaltees]

Sweetheart.... all 80 people will not show, trust me.

 

Yes everyone is ALWAYS excited, but when it gets down to the wire even those with the most excitement in their hearts may be a no show.

 

I say keep your 'unique' wedding, and invite all 80 guest if you can afford it. The cruise line never minds when you upgrade...more money for them!

 

If you can't afford the 80, then start cutting... you CAN do it. Even if you have to blame it on the cruise line lol.

 

Thank you. I will keep that in mind.

 

That reminds me of another CCL bride who had some anguish, last week, about having too few guests. This is a good reminder that if someone is not able to personally witness your wedding it does not mean they don't love you or don't care about your life. They just may not be able to attend.

[brklyn78]

I didn't know the public would be able to witness the wedding. This sort of freaks me out a bit. For some reason, I thought the rooms would be closed for a private event.

 

I don't know what ship she's talking about, but Carnival definitely had signs on the Pride saying that the room was Closed. I could imagine someone sneaking in to the balcony level of the Taj Mahal lounge and watching, but that's the only room that this could happen in. Plus, I doubt there are many people who would be so rude as to spy on someone's wedding. I wouldn't worry about that.

[6rugrats]

. The catholic church isn't going anywhere, we can always go back and have a "proper" service in the eyes of the church.

No, you can't. Once you are already married, you can't have a Nuptial Mass. If you are both Catholics and have a civil marriage, to have the marriage recognized by the church, you'll have to go through the convalidation process, which takes longer than just a week; there are seven steps involved. You are supposed to refrain from receiving the Eucharist until this process is completed. You can then have a Marriage Convalidation

 

 

IMO, this is a pain and if you truly desire a Nuptial Mass, you should just have one in the first place.

[WDrake_98]

Guests:

I heard from a past Carnival bride that she was able to have more then 50 non-sailing guests. Is this limit a flexible Carnival rule or a regulated Custom's policy? Yes we have made exceptions to allow more then 50 non-sailing guests, please give me a number you think you may have and I will work on getting an approval.

 

Things are good!

[Herbaltees]

Guests:

I heard from a past Carnival bride that she was able to have more then 50 non-sailing guests. Is this limit a flexible Carnival rule or a regulated Custom's policy? Yes we have made exceptions to allow more then 50 non-sailing guests, please give me a number you think you may have and I will work on getting an approval.

 

Things are good!

 

Oh wow. Thank you. This is such good news.

[jebuell]

I didn't know the public would be able to witness the wedding. This sort of freaks me out a bit. For some reason, I thought the rooms would be closed for a private event.

 

Yes, exactly. We completed the pre cana course so I feel well prepared.

 

 

 

As a witness to the various weddings, did you really think they were personality lacking/ lack luster events? Most of my guests, with the exception of my children, have never sailed on a cruise ship before. Most have never even seen a cruise ship. Everyone is excited, because they've never even heard of the idea (hence the increase in guests.)

 

They put a sign outside the theater that says "Wedding in Progress", but the last two Carnival weddings I went to had people coming in during the ceremony. Mostly once they saw there was actually a ceremony going on, they'd leave, but a few people (mostly teens, I noticed) would stick around watching. There was no one standing out side preventing people from coming in and since these were embarkation day weddings there were thousands of people boarding who wanted to explore the ship and so they were doing just that.

 

Just remember that if you go through Carnival for your wedding you're likely dealing with vendors that will have never met you before. Therefor they do things their way, which is the same way they do things every week. Not that there's anything wrong with that! They do this a lot so they do it well. But your wedding will be a lot like the wedding before it and the wedding after it. If your guests frequently attend embarkation cruise weddings they will start to notice that it's the same venue, the same decorations, the same ceremony, etc. But if they've never been to one before then it will be unique to them.

[Lipz]

This is a good reminder that if someone is not able to personally witness your wedding it does not mean they don't love you or don't care about your life. They just may not be able to attend.

 

Exactly! We have to stop taking everything so personal. Life happens, be happy!

[mrsgomez2011]

I had my wedding in the main theater because we had 100 people at our wedding and all te doors were closed and no one ever came in. If people were attempting to be nosy, I never noticed it because I was completely swallowed in my moment and my wedding. The theater on the imagination was gorgeous and matched my wedding colors of eggplant and champagne. The main theater looked pretty full because of the amount of guests we had and it even allowed me to make a super grand entrance down the stairs to the first floor and to the stage.

 

I was beyond anal about my wedding but it went so fast and ended up being perfect in every way. :-) Don't over think it, you are all marrying the man or woman of your dreams and that's really what matters.