Parents Need to Control thier Kids.

[ehogan]

I have to agree with the concerns about some children on board.

 

On our last cruise (May 2005) there was one family with three children ranging between about 8 and 12. While we saw more than enough of these kids, I don't recall ever seeing the parents with them. I don't think the parents had any concept of consideration for others or any idea of how to teach these kids proper manners.

 

The worst incident was during an evening performance in the main theatre. All three of the children were up and down, changing seats constantly, running through the aisles and running in front of the stage. This was at 10 P.M. when I would think the best place for them would have been in bed.

 

I also must comment that while this was going on, no one from RCCL did anything to stop their behaviour.

 

Please, if you have children and wish them to accompany you on a cruise, remember that your parenting responsibilities don't end when you arrive on board.

 

I know that some cruise lines (I think Celebrity) are now promoting "adult only" cruises and I can't help but think this is in response to complaints about misbehavior of children on board. Even though I raised three kids and love children in general, I might be on the next one Celebrity offers.

[colette5479]

I thought this behavor was just something Carnivores did:p

 

Can you imagine what would have happened to US if we would have done this as kids?? I know I would not be able to sit down for awhile:eek:

[TheParrotHeads]

That rule exists for one reason and one reason only: The Cruise Line wants you to buy your booze from them. It's all about the money. Anyone who doesn't think so is a sheep.

 

Back on topic: Last December I went on a cruise with my family. We had Santa signs on our doors with our names on it. This was helpfull to my 83-year-old father who "gets confused" sometimes. I once caught a teen ager messing with the sign on my parents' door. I stepped up quickly, got right in his face and hissed at him "You little mother ______! I catch you touching anything on anyone's door again I'm going to rip-off your ____, shove them down your throat, then throw you into the ocean." to which the little amart-ass responded, as he was shaking in his boots, "you can't talk to me like that." to which I responded "what you gonna do? tell someone? go ahead, I'll just deny it you little f____."

 

That's the problem with kids today: they've not been back-handed enough.

 

I can't recall ever being talked to like that as a young kid, but I'm sure they might have been silently spoken in those spankings I was getting. :D

[Travelgrrl]

"...They are in the minority" - CDollaz, based on what? Your scientific survey of the same?

 

My kids started cruising when they were 11 and 10. Though they never were much for Adventure Ocean or other organized activities for kids, they have always had a great time and I know where they are every minute of every day.

 

They enjoy: reading, sitting by the pool or in the Solarium (now that they are over 16), fine dining, shows in the theater, movies in the showroom or old movies in our cabin, doing things like arts and crafts or facials/manicures in our cabin (well, not my son so much), snorkeling or doing other activities in ports, the rock wall, the ice rink, and so on. They do not need to be coddled every moment with constant activities, nor do I ignore them, as they spend about every waking moment with me.

 

They are not the type of teen, or adult, to deface things, break things, vandalize things, on land or at sea.

 

There are bad kids out there, and I'm sure some of my son's teachers think he's a 'class clown', but to blanketly say that all teens are ill suited for cruising is just silly.

[cdollaz]

"...They are in the minority" - CDollaz, based on what? Your scientific survey of the same?

 

.

 

No, based on my scientific study of the bored looks on the faces of the majority of young teens on my cruise. Never did I say all young teens are like this, but it is foolish for us think that most teens are going to enjoy cruising, especially if they are dragged along by their parents when they didn't want to go anyway.

[Soxfan05]

I disagree. Teens are NOT young adults. They're teens -- not children, not yet adults -- and they still need a significant amount of guidance and discipline from their parents. When we tell them they're "young adults", that gives the idea that they share many of the same privledges as adults. Drinking, for one example. I'd be willing to bet that many of the things you described wouldn't have happened if these kids hadn't been drinking.

 

Parents who don't want to parent on vacation should leave their children at home.

 

Mrs. Pete, I have to argue semantics with you. A person between 15-18 is what I CONSIDER to be a young adult. At 15, they can get a job and learners permit to drive. They are high school students who are attending adult type dances and making decisions about their futures. They are expected to maintain good grades and be responsible enough to make good decisions so they can get into college. At 16, they can do all of the above and drive. At 17, many are graduating highschool and deciding what their career path will be. At 18, they can vote on important issues and go off and die for their country and are legally considered adults.

 

If we are going to give kids this much freedom and responsibility at that age, I will happily give them the title of "young adult". They just have to know that along with that comes a responsibility and SOME rights. Consuming alcohol is not a "right" of a young adult. It is a "right" of someone 18 or over on a cruise ship and 21 or over in the U.S.

[Dolphin-dan]

I Just got back from Explorer Jun 19-26. I never seen kids 15-18 so drunk and boozed up and causing problems. And before we say its the Cruise workers fault, its ultimately the parents fault for not being able to control thier kids. I was on deck 9 aft and the Kids stole a womans wheelchair twice. She was in tears and on the hallway floor the second time they took it. Someone also shattered a glass casing on my deck also. I would think adults wouldn't have done this. Also the envelopes they hang outside of some peoples cabins for tickets and appointments etc. were now on the wrong cabins. I took some of them and put them back to the correct cabins. There

were other happenings also.

 

So you parents who say its not my kids. Look again, it could be. Why are parents allowing thier teens to run amuck is beyond me. I have to wonder now who the parents are, Them or thier kids.

 

So watch what your teens are buying on thier cards. Watch your porfolio on the tv. Then you won't have any surprises.

 

enough said.

 

How do you know they were 15-18 did you ask them?

[PrettyLA]

I am a teenager and sometimes I will do things that are quite obnoxious. However, I would NEVER vandalize the property of anyone else. And it blows my mind to think how someone of any age could possibly be so cruel as to take an elderly person's wheelchair, not only once, but twice. That completely disgusts me. Just because you are still maturing does not make it OK. By your teenage years I would think most people have a good sense of what is right and what is wrong. And while I think that parents are to blame for their children's behavior, I also think that teenagers should use common sense. I think that it is pretty evident that most people by the time that they reach age 15 should know that destructing what does not belong to them is not acceptable but for some reason, some people think that it is "fun" and they do it for their own personal gain. What they gain from it, I do not know. Maybe they think it makes them look "cool" or so they can have something to laugh about later on. I'm going to admit that my mother does not know where I am at all of the time but she knows me well enough to know that I am not going to ever do something like this. Apparently, parents need to know how their children behave, because more likely than not the same kids who did this on that cruise have done it previously as well. Some parents refuse to believe that their children could possibly do anything wrong so they let it go. This bothers me. I admit to being unruly sometimes, having obnoxious behavior; it is part of growing up and learning. But you can't pass every mistake off as "part of growing up", which is where parents go wrong. The worst behavior I think that I have had is probably being loud with my friends in a mall or store while we joke around, which I am positive is rude and I am sure that it annoys people, but that kind of behavior, in my opinion, can be looked past and forgiven. Vandalizism and injuring others is in no way acceptable. The behavior that those teenagers displayed on that cruise embarrasses me completely to be in the same generation as them. I hope that they can someday receive the help that they so desperately need. Parents please know how your child behaves and have a good sense of what they are doing most of the time.

[Bosjoe]

How do you know they were 15-18 did you ask them?

 

I did not come out and just ask them, but you can tell very much if someone is in thier early teens. If I was an actual worker I would have asked for ID. I am not 100% sure of thier age, but you just know that they are not 18 and over.

[cdollaz]

I did not come out and just ask them, but you can tell very much if someone is in thier early teens. If I was an actual worker I would have asked for ID. I am not 100% sure of thier age, but you just know that they are not 18 and over.

 

Exactly, you do not need special skills to be able to be fairly accurately guess the age of someone that young.

[Bosjoe]

I am a teenager and sometimes I will do things that are quite obnoxious. However, I would NEVER vandalize the property of anyone else. And it blows my mind to think how someone of any age could possibly be so cruel as to take an elderly person's wheelchair, not only once, but twice. That completely disgusts me. Just because you are still maturing does not make it OK. By your teenage years I would think most people have a good sense of what is right and what is wrong. And while I think that parents are to blame for their children's behavior, I also think that teenagers should use common sense. I think that it is pretty evident that most people by the time that they reach age 15 should know that destructing what does not belong to them is not acceptable but for some reason, some people think that it is "fun" and they do it for their own personal gain. What they gain from it, I do not know. Maybe they think it makes them look "cool" or so they can have something to laugh about later on. I'm going to admit that my mother does not know where I am at all of the time but she knows me well enough to know that I am not going to ever do something like this. Apparently, parents need to know how their children behave, because more likely than not the same kids who did this on that cruise have done it previously as well. Some parents refuse to believe that their children could possibly do anything wrong so they let it go. This bothers me. I admit to being unruly sometimes, having obnoxious behavior; it is part of growing up and learning. But you can't pass every mistake off as "part of growing up", which is where parents go wrong. The worst behavior I think that I have had is probably being loud with my friends in a mall or store while we joke around, which I am positive is rude and I am sure that it annoys people, but that kind of behavior, in my opinion, can be looked past and forgiven. Vandalizism and injuring others is in no way acceptable. The behavior that those teenagers displayed on that cruise embarrasses me completely to be in the same generation as them. I hope that they can someday receive the help that they so desperately need. Parents please know how your child behaves and have a good sense of what they are doing most of the time.

 

Great Responce: As teens we all have done stupid things. It is part of growing up. But teens still need to know what is right and wrong and to show repect for people who are in thier lives everyday i.e. Teachers, Police, Mall Cops ;) workers in those stores and thier own Parents..

[Bosjoe]

I was on this cruise too, on deck nine aft. There were 25 fifteen year old girls celebrating their "quincenera" during this time, one family we spoke to had 54 members along for the occasion. I caught some younger ones pushing all the buttons on the elevators, and gave them a talk about courtesy. They just ran off. There seemed to be more problem children towards the end, in my opinion. In our party we had 2 17 YO girls, 1 16 YO boy and 2 in their early 20s, plus my grandson who is only 4 1/2 months. The girls spent their time either hanging out at the pool or taking turns strolling the baby around. They themselves remarked how dumb some of the kids were acting and wondered where the parents were.

 

Hi There, What side aft were you on Port(Left) or Starboard(right). I was in 9374. The first few nights they didn't bother this ladies wheelchair as far as I Know.

[justaknucklehead]

Golly, they must have been good kids those few nights, but I when when they realized nobody really cared what they did, all hell broke lose.

[firstcruise05]

Hey Firstcruise05...

 

Blaming the teachers makes you look absolutely ridiculous! I am a teacher and I am going to print your post and share it with my peers. We always get a kick out of the "blamers" in our society!

 

Of course it is the teacher's fault when the parents give up on their marriage right? Of course it is! :confused:

 

Stop blaming teachers and start embracing them. Naturally there are your select poor teachers but for every bad one, you will find 20 terrific teachers who sacrifice a lot everyday to mold our future doctors, lawyers and even cruise directors!

 

LOL, go ahead and print the post and the laugh will be on you :D . Did I place the "blame" of unruly children on teachers? NO, I did not. What I said (if you would take your "automatic defense mode" glasses off) was that I was tired of teachers with attitudes. YOU are a prime example of a teacher who doesn't read or listen before they respond (I hope you're not an English teacher LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL). In fact, I DO give my son's teachers the benefit of the doubt...I DO work with them and I DO expect them to try and work with me. I was giving examples of bad teachers because every post on this board seems to list all the terrible and tortuous things that parents do to all the innocent teachers out there. Let me tell you, not every teacher is a saint. You get paid to teach the kids...its your job. If you teach a child who eventually becomes a doctor or a lawyer (or another teacher) then congratulations: Job well done. You do not get paid to take crap from children: taking care of that is the principals job. Obviously he will enlist the help of the parents or the authorities.

 

I didn't blame teachers for children misbehaving...I was blaming specific teachers for their incredibly hurtful actions towards children.

 

SusanNJay:

thank you for clarifying that. That is exactly what I meant when I said there are just as many bad teachers as there are bad parents. I was referring to them in their relative numbers.

 

I did speak to the principal about the bus issue and he said that he would address the issue with the teacher. It turned out that the children were being incredibly noisy at the end of the day...yelling, laughing, as well as general chatter and you couldn't hear the speaker from across the room. The teacher was trying to be understanding with the children by allowing them to talk since it WAS at the end of the day however, it gets a little out of hand when 4 children miss the bus because of it. I communicated with the principal just fine but the teacher had a wicked defense reaction and wouldn't even hear me out.

 

And the threatening teacher situation is still in the works. We (as parents) complained about her humiliating the kids last year and the principals reaction was "Well we haven't heard any complaints about her before" which we found out after the fact was untrue. This year, when I heard that my nephew was having problems with her (along with other students in the class) I told my sister in law to stick with it and not to let them tell her that they hadn't had any previous complaints. When the "threat" came about my SIL really pushed the issue. The principal did not want to help (this is an older teacher who is probably ready for retirement...perhaps when she started teaching it was acceptable for her to do those things) so she went to the superintendant with the statement that she was not afraid to take the issue up with the authorities if need be. I'm glad she is pursuing it because next years class should not have to go through that kind of stress. I think the school system is just hoping she will retire. I agree that there are many wonderful teachers out there but there are also many parents who will do whatever they can to support their child's teacher as well as their school system in general. There is good and bad everywhere.

[justaknucklehead]

However, more often than not, parents don't acknowledge that their children are wrong and blame the teacher. There is no respect, because when they go home, the blame is placed on the teacher. As a parent, you should back up the teacher and (without putting down the teacher, that's the hard part) go to the school and address the situation. This is not usually done. At home, the teacher is called an idiot and the kids now have your backing.

[shmthaus]

I have had quite a bit of experience with kids on the street and there is a rampant display of lack of respect for anyone. Not just with those in authority (police, teachers, employers, etc), but with anyone who would any type of authority over them.

 

There were several times that if a young person had acted the same way 20yrs ago, they would have been heavily disciplined by the parents. Now it is a touchy/feely world and society is suffering for it.

 

Anyone watch Nanny 911 or SuperNanny lately.....

 

(ok, I will put on my flame retardant suit now) :D

 

FLAME ON!!!!!!

[phtktz3]

On my last cruise aboard the Monarch, the cabin next to mine had 4 children in it ranging in age from 4-13 years old. The first night I put up with them banging on the wall , jumping on the bed and screaming until all hours. The second day my room steward approached me and told me I should go to the guest relations desk and tell them of the problem. He said the kids had also trashed the room and they had been running in the halls most of the day. He said that he could not say anything to the parents or he would suffer by them possibly reporting him or not tipping him. I did go to the pursers desk and I told them of the situation and after I told them of all I had heard and been thru with these kids I said " I'm sure there is nothing you can do" one of the staff looked up and looked me right in the eye and said" Oh yes there is, we can have the parents put off this ship" I went back to my cabin and about a 1/2 hour later the pursers desk called my cabin and asked if all was all right...I told her that as a matter of fact they had the TV blaring loud and appeared to be jumping on the bed. A few minutes later I heard a knock on their door and a few other doors...seems both sets of parents put their kids all in one room while they enjoyed nice quiet cabins to themselves. After a stern talking to from ship security I did not hear another peep out of those kids until the last day when we were leaving and the 13 y/o was kind enoough to call me some names. I still can not believe that these parents left a 13 y/o in charge of these young kids.

[hermang]

Way to pass along the holiday spirit. What a mouth on you. IMO your behavior was just as much out of line as those removing the "Santa" from your door, actually your behavior was worse. You're an adult and should know better. Had I been the parents I would have grounded my kids for life and then headed over to your cabin and ask you where do you get off using language like that on a child. Shame on you!

 

OP was meerly speaking in the vernacular of this urchin - Please and Thank you he would not comprehend but that is exactly the language the "darling" probably uses on a regular basis.

 

Sorry but I happen to agree with OP and If I were Santa I would place the lump of coal where the sun didn't shine for this kid.

[hermang]

There is a thread on a family being kicked off I believe the Navigator or Mariner for ,if I remember the complete thread, damage caused by their kids.

[MrsPete]

Mrs. Pete, I have to argue semantics with you. A person between 15-18 is what I CONSIDER to be a young adult. At 15, they can get a job and learners permit to drive. They are high school students who are attending adult type dances and making decisions about their futures. They are expected to maintain good grades and be responsible enough to make good decisions so they can get into college. At 16, they can do all of the above and drive. At 17, many are graduating highschool and deciding what their career path will be. At 18, they can vote on important issues and go off and die for their country and are legally considered adults.

High school dances, good grades, learning to drive -- teen things, not adult things. Kids this age still live at home. Their parents are legally responsible for their food, clothing, and shelter; in fact, parents can be taken to court if they don't take care of these things. Up until 16, parents can be taken to court if they don't make sure their kids attend school regularly. Kids this age cannot make medical decisions for themselves, nor can they enter into business agreements (such as car payments) without an adult's approval. Up until a certain age, kids cannot work without a parent's consent, and they can only work certain hours and in certain jobs. Few of those jobs are full time, and almost none of them provide insurance or benefits. A 16 year old needs a parent's signature to get a driver's license. If they are arrested, they cannot be placed in the general population. The list could go on . . . Certainly they are PREPARING to be adults, but they are still kids.

 

I still maintain that a "young adult" is college age. Anyone younger is a kid.

 

Why do I think this is important enough to argue? Because I think we've allowed our children too many adult privledges at an early age. They have a great deal of time to be adults; they have only a few precious years to be children. Why rush them? Calling them "young adults" before their time is just one more way of rushing them.

[mrsb]

I am a teacher, but I will not become defensive and reply to the teacher-bashing that has appeared on this thread..... it would be off topic....

I have cruised with and without my children since they were young (about 5 and 8 I think). We chose to cruise with them because they enjoyed it, we enjoyed their company, and they BEHAVED. What we have witnessed, however, are too many parents who appear to cruise with their children because they want to have time to themselves, and they see the entire crew as babysitters for their children (who should be kept out of their sight for as much as possible). I have seen this in the public areas, pools, and even in the dining rooms...

Whenever I see a child acting appropriately on a ship I try to compliment them, even though it drives my own kids crazy ("mom, stop being such a teacher"). I will occasionally speak to kids who are misbehaving, believing "It takes a village to raise a child". But I don't want to deal with an angry parent in my face afterwards....I am on the ship to relax, not change the world. I try doing that throughout the school year....

We leave for a cruise on the 8th, and I am hoping that we will not have unruly children to deal with!

[Happy ks]

It's not only astounding, but amusing to read what some people think is a solution to the problem of misbehaving teens. Kick their a__, call them names, yell at them? No wonder they respond as they do. What ever happened to a little respect? It does go both ways, you know. I've encountered teens (more like adolescents) in the elevator and on the stairs and politley asked them to stop, or move. Guess what? Most kids, when approached by an adult with good manners, will respond appropriately. Most kids, when approached by an angry, rude adult, will respond back the same way.

 

I'm not saying this is always the case, there are some truly awful people out there. But where do the rude adults learn to be so? By being treated rudely themselves throughout their lives. Being kind to a misbehaving teen can actually disarm them, they can be so used to being treated harshly.

 

The criminal acts need to be treated as such, but not by fellow pax. There are times when an entire family gets kicked off a ship because of disruptive and criminal activity by their kids. One would have their doubts as to if the parents ever discussed things with the kids prior to the cruise (or any other vacation) to let them know what can happen.

 

I'm sure many of these misbehaving kids were never disciplined from the time they were little and don't have the tools of self-discipline. The problem with no self-control and blaming others for their own mistakes will haunt them all their lives. A stranger yelling at them, calling them names and threatening them will only add to their lack of respect for society, it will not teach them right from wrong.

 

It's really too bad that the few bad apples ruin the image of all children. The vast majority of them are well bahaved. I also don't buy into the statement that 20 years ago this would not have happened. Bad parenting has been going on since the beginning of time.

[ciship]

Maybe kids 17 and under should all be required to wear wrist bracelets that give their parents name and cabin number. Maybe THEN, the parents MIGHT have an interest in what their kids are doing when they arent around???

 

Yeah......I like that idea......!

[justaknucklehead]

I like that idea too, maybe if the parents had to get off their drunk rearends at the pool, they would monitor their kids better.

[blusky558]

BosJoe,

We had all of the aft E1 cabins, 9692,9690, 9390 and 9392. I was in 9692 at the very end off to the right port side. Our room steward was Robert from Trinidad & Tobago, they call him Trini. I did see a chair in the hall several times on the port side, that may have been hers. We had the very young baby boy in the blue stroller you may have seen on deck 9 at times.

 

Do you have a description of the kids messing with the chair?