Negative experiences with kids club? 3 year old

[bearette]

We recent returned from a trip on NCL where my twins turned three on board. While my daughter did well with the structured activities my son did not. I was told he would not participate and just wanted to do his own thing. After two days I was asked to pick him up because he started to push other kids. ( as a teacher I understand this so I took him and am not coming about that). I was frustrated because I could not get a clear answer from the counselors about what was happening I would get brushed off when asking questions about what happened. What I thought would be fun turned into two very stressful days at sea. As they were only of age the last few days of the cruise I didn't make a big deal about it, but obviously our first experience was not as successful as I had hoped.

 

I would like to do another cruise soon, but the experience of the kids club has me worried. I wanted to hear from other parents whose kids didn't do so well if they improved with age. Any other experiences that didn't start out so well but improved? I know we don't have to use the kids program but it would be a nice option for mom and dad time.

 

Sent from my KFTHWI using Forums mobile app

[flhokie]

Our experience was a little different. At 2, DD did great in the RCCL nursery. At 3, she did great in the MSC children's program. But, at 4, she would not stay in the children's program on Disney. According to her, she did not like it because of the big kids (think free for all with 3-12 year olds all together).

 

I think it's a matter of finding the right program (activities, staff and age groups). Unfortunately, that can be hard to find without experiencing it 1st hand.

[kitkat343]

Yes, children can tend to grow into drop off programs. My son, at 2 1/2 struggled at a fairly structured gymnastics summer camp program. He did much better on Fridays, when it was unstructured and the kids got to pick their own activities. Now, at 4, he participates happily in martial arts, which is extremely disciplined.

 

With a young child who you think might struggle in a structured program, it is important to try to sail when schools are in session. Our first cruise with our son sailed on January 8th, and there were only 11 children on board. The previous cruise with the exact same itinerary that left December 29th had 150 kids on board. The counselors told me they were glad we chose our sailing, because on the previous one they had to structure all the activities tightly and could not adapt the activities for children who wanted more freedom. On our sailing, the children were given a choice of either participating in an arts and craft activity or engaging in free play. The counselors would bring the children supplies if there was something else they wanted to make or play with. With 150 children, they just simply did not have the time for that. It might be hard for you as a teacher to sail when schools are in session, but it might be what your son needs at this age. If there is no flexibility in your schedule, you might have to wait a bit longer. But children can mature quickly and your son at 3 1/2 or 4 might be ready for a structured program.

 

You can try to call the cruise line to get a number of children on board a sailing you are considering booking. Some people have had success getting this information from cruise lines, and others have been told it is against company policy. But its worth a chance, and if you can find a sailing with fewer kids you are more likely to see flexibility in the kids club.

Edited April 3, 2015 by kitkat343

[notentirelynormal]

Not sure if your kids go to daycare but one day is good the next day is not. Your kids have two distinct personalities and should be treated as such. Just because one likes oranges doesn't mean the other will. One piece of advice I gave my son when he had the second daughter..... she is not the first one.... she is her own person. Don't expect because #1 became potty trained at a certain age, or talked, or walked or or or that #2 will. Take a deep breath, you have a lifetime of differences to live through.

[bearette]

Not sure if your kids go to daycare but one day is good the next day is not. Your kids have two distinct personalities and should be treated as such. Just because one likes oranges doesn't mean the other will. One piece of advice I gave my son when he had the second daughter..... she is not the first one.... she is her own person. Don't expect because #1 became potty trained at a certain age, or talked, or walked or or or that #2 will. Take a deep breath, you have a lifetime of differences to live through.

 

That is absolutely true. My kids though they are twins are nothing alike.

 

 

The advice was sound thanks guys. As they have never been in any day care ( grandparents only) this was their first structured experience. I know I'm a teacher, but it is hard to see these with clear eyes with your own kids.

 

 

 

Sent from my KFTHWI using Forums mobile app

[Cruisin' Chick]

It's too bad that you couldn't get the feedback. Is it possible for the grandparents to take your kids to a semi-structure program to see how they do -- I don't know if there's still Gymboree (I was taking my girl to that for a couple of years), but there's the YMCA, parks (some cities have little kid classes), Mom n' me classes (which these aren't restricted to mother/child)...

 

I didn't enroll my daughter in school until kindergarten, even though she was at a home day care center for her first four years so she can be socialized (she ended up being an only child). I think that helped for when she started school.

[BCCRUSINGCOUPLE]

We are very sorry to hear about your bad experiece you had. Our son just turned 3 about two weeks before we got on board our Princess ship. When we went to the kids club we found out there was only 4 kids in his age group on the sailing well we were little bit disapointed. Please note our son goes to full time day care. We dropped him off and he was upset and crying one princess staff member came over took our Ds hand and said lets go and play. So of course all night we were worried went back a few times to look through the window and he seemed he was having fun considering there were only two kids in the class total. We dropped him off another time no crying but there was someone else there and it seemed like she just didn't want to be there. Overall we were happy but I do think it really depends on who the teachers are we found the younger teachers were having lots of fun with the kids. We were on a 10 day cruise and used the kids club 5 times for about 2 hours each time. I do belive that they could handel things diffrently I mean we have kids at our ds day care that sometimes get out of control they can't send them home.

[Queen of Oakville]

That is absolutely true. My kids though they are twins are nothing alike.

 

 

The advice was sound thanks guys. As they have never been in any day care ( grandparents only) this was their first structured experience. I know I'm a teacher, but it is hard to see these with clear eyes with your own kids.

 

 

 

Sent from my KFTHWI using Forums mobile app

 

This was your problem.

 

When my kids did their first cruise, I think my son was 2 1/2 and my daughter would have just turned 4. He was not schooled yet (we had a nanny) and my daughter was into her 1st year of preschool (casa - Montessori).

 

My son HATED camp carnival. He just did not like being left behind. HE wanted to be with his family. My daughter just did okay. But Camp Carnival was nothing like preschool. She adapted, but she didn't love it. She never asked to go, but if we took her, she stayed. She many issues with poorly behaved children. One girl was always stealing toys from her. She would complain to the counsellors but they would not do anything. This girl was in our "dining area" and my daughter was always pointing her out - saying "That's her - she's the one who tries to take all the toys". lol.

 

Then the next year we cruised HAL, and it was a completely different experience. My son had started pre-school. He loved Club HAL so much (they both did) - that they were SOBBING on the last day begging to stay just one more day.

 

 

 

One of the things my kid's haven't liked about Royal (and Carnival) is that they have a fairly international makeup to their kid's club personnel. Many of them have accents, and are difficult to understand. I found this especially on FOTS, there were so many latin accents. I'd hear them during "story time" and would wonder how the kids understood what was being read. I know mine didn't.

 

 

 

My kids (now 7 and 9) fare better in kid's clubs with fewer kids. They like the adult interaction, and a more school-like environment. My kids are lost on a Disney ship where there are hundreds of screaming kids. My kids just cling to the walls and keep to themselves.

 

 

Don't give up on cruising just yet. Once your kids are schooled, it will be a better experience. but you also have to know your kids and know whether they would mesh better in an environment with more kids or fewer kids.

[Queen of Oakville]

I also wanted to mention that i'm sorry you did not get feedback on why it didn't work.

 

I think you probably didn't get feedback because the counsellors didn't know or care to figure it out. To be fair to them, they get hundreds of kids some weeks, and they just can't take the time to cater to 1 child. Your experience on a different ship can be completely different.

[denas]

I've now cruised or done all-inclusives with kids clubs with three kids who have been anywhere from infants to now a teenager and every single age in between. Every single vacation is a new adventure. They loved the kids clubs one trip. Same cruise, same kids, hate it the next. They are different every cruise since they are a different age which means either different activities because they have now gone into a different age group or just different interests. Plus the kids programming changes regularly enough that it is hard to know what to expect. We have been on Disney three times and they have had completely different children's programming set up each of the times (they used to have age groups and specific clubs). My rule for cruising with kids is consider myself lucky if I get an hour alone to have a drink without a phone call!!! Sometimes I am requiring them to leave so we can have dinner together as a family and other times I am begging them to go for just an hour so I can do to the spa!!! It is all still great family time if you have zero expectations for how your kids will feel about the clubs/programming.