At What Age do you Feel it's Safe to Let Your Kids Roam (Allure esp.)?

[Ocean Dancer]

We've been letting our 12yo have freedom for about 2 years now. It was restricted quite a bit in the beginning (she could leave us, go get a drink or ice cream, and come back), but loosened up soon enough. Granted she's been on plenty of cruises, knows what you should and should not do, and knows if I catch her doing anything wrong that will be it for that. She has charging privileges, but again knows how to handle it.

 

You'll know your kids, and what they're capable of. I think we short-shift our kids in what they're capable of overall. In days past, and in many parts of the world, kids are out working by the time they hit their teens. If you raise them right, give them direction, give them a set of rules and boundaries, then they will be fine. Stick with the basics as most have said on here (no going in cabins, set a reasonable curfew for what your kids are used to, with a little extra vacation time in it, etc).

 

You sound like a good parent!:)

[FLSteve11]

No one who knows me would call me self involved, we have two children and three grandchildren, and are definitely NOT party poopers. Who are you talking about?

 

I'm sure any adult cruiser would agree with me on the above if it's happened to them. The cruise lines are not baby sitters unless they are enrolled in Adventure Ocean etc, and at a certain age they are allowed to leave on their own.

 

We have met many wonderful decent polite kids through the years, it's that bad apple kid who's parents are too busy chair hogging, I guess.;)

 

The person wanted advice on when it would be ok to let their kids have some freedom on a cruise, and you went off on some diatribe about what a few bad kids do in response. Yes, a few kids do those things on cruises, quite a few adults do them as well. Not sure what the point was to the Ops question, outside of you not being happy with kids on a cruise. We get it, there are some bad people on cruises , kids, adults, seniors. But to go off on a rant about what a few of the bad ones do, was nothing more then exactly what it sounded like. Self-involved, anti-kids.

 

Yes, they're not baby sitters, and at 9 is when they're allowed on their own. So apparently that's when cruise lines feel they're allowed out on their own.

 

I'm sure you're NOT that way in person, or in reality, but that post just comes across as that. We don't need EVERY single post about kids, or parents seeking advice on them, to be adults/seniors complaining about some bad kids. You really don't see parents starting, and continuing posts about the horrible way seniors treat others on cruises, though I'm sure every adult, and kid, has seen it. I know it was an unfair response to you, and I apologize for it, but it's just tiring.

[FLSteve11]

You sound like a good parent!:)

 

Thank you, we've been lucky to be on many cruises, so we've tried to teach her through the years the right way to behave, not just on cruises, but in any public place. Sadly it's generally the kids who misbehave on cruises that are those who aren't taught that at home as well (and those parents are probably some of the adults who misbehave as well. Apple doesn't fall far from the tree, unfortunately)

[cruisequeen4ever]

I don't have children, but after years of reading of scary incidents (rare but they do happen), I wouldn't want to allow my child to roam free. As they say, the ship is a microcosm of society, and society is a scary place now. It might be ok to allow daytime wandering only in groups, but I definitely wouldn't recommend evenings. Also, I would tell them not to get any drinks while alone after reading of crew members slipping something into teen's drinks. Also, require them to tell you exactly when and where they're going somewhere and the route used in case of emergency. Lastly, of course not allow them to go into other people's staterooms. I would say even those of girl friends because you don't know who THOSE girls would let in or who they're sailing with.

 

 

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[S.A.M.J.R.]

Also, require them to tell you exactly when and where they're going somewhere and the route used in case of emergency.

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So you know in advance what route you're going to take from the WJ to the skating rink (for example)? Heck, I couldn't tell you 5 minutes before I made the trip.

 

I don't think it's right to hold kids to a higher standard than what we'd hold ourselves.

[cello56]

OK, I have one more concern to share with you! My sister and her family have cruised a lot with her three girls, starting when they were 14, 12, 10. They are all now late teens to early twenties. What I noticed in talking the the girls is how quickly they formed friendships. It seemed to be like "I just met you yesterday, but you are my best friend I have ever had!" I see an inherent problem with this kind of instant best friend status. You don't really know that other child. You don't know their parents. You don't know their value systems. It just seems so very easy for kids - especially teenage girls in my opinion - to get caught up in these newfound friendships while onboard.

 

Just something to watch out for. All kids - even the straight A wonderfully mature ones - can be influenced by friends. You just want to make sure that you child is evaluating the choices they and their new friends are making with their eyes wide open.

[slg1979]

Here's my opinion-- I started cruising when I was ten. My older brother and I went w our gparents on a very small ship. It was great- they honestly let us roam wild.. lol. There were maybe twenty other kids total onboard.. we would do our own skits on the stage in the theatre during the day with the other kids. No kids club in those days.. my brother grew tired of it.. he was rather fond of the quarter slider in the casino!! Lol- my gparents were not too happy when they found him there. It became an issue-- he was hooked. They, gparents and casino staff, banned him from even walking through the casino. Yes, we hung out in stair wells and road the elevators.. had no idea what little sh*ts we were being. That being said- never had a problem with weirdos or perverts. Now cruising as a childless just turned 37 year old cruiser when I see kids doing something snotty I call them on it. On one of our transatlantic cruises there were two little girls around 10. They were running around the ship the entire crossing like feral animals. Hair unkept and same clothes for days and days. We were traveling with our ladies from LA who are in their 70's. The girls cut them off getting into the elevator and pushed the door closed button sticking their tongues out as the shot away!! I saw girls later that evening. Holed up in a corner at casino at a slot machine feeding it cash.. yes. I told the casino host and the security guard of the offending children's actions. Later that evening. Seen the mother- finally- up in the nightclub made up like a movie star- girls still in same dirty clothing complaining someone has turned in her sweeties and now she has to bring them with her everywhere.. idk what they were doing in nightclub with the age restriction..[emoji849] I think the rules about strangers applies to all ages, and genders. Last cruise there was this guy who was there every time I turned around. He causally chatted my husband and i up. Fast forward next days he approaches me outside windjammer. Says oh I have some spa stuff for you. Come back to my cabin with me [emoji33]... I told him no! I have to give my husband his pills.. I told my Besty bartender in casino and she took care of the situation.. saying the crew knows there are cameras everywhere it's the other guests one needs to watch. My two cents. Lol-

 

Signed

 

former devil child cruiser

 

 

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[tlatrice]

The comment was not personal to you or your child. I apologize if my use of the word "you" led to that impression. It was meant for the original poster and anyone else looking for advice here. Children may be of different ages and maturity levels. Crew should always be a first resort not a last.

 

 

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Ah! Gotcha! Thanks for clearing that up!

[FLSteve11]

I don't have children, but after years of reading of scary incidents (rare but they do happen), I wouldn't want to allow my child to roam free. As they say, the ship is a microcosm of society, and society is a scary place now. It might be ok to allow daytime wandering only in groups, but I definitely wouldn't recommend evenings. Also, I would tell them not to get any drinks while alone after reading of crew members slipping something into teen's drinks. Also, require them to tell you exactly when and where they're going somewhere and the route used in case of emergency. Lastly, of course not allow them to go into other people's staterooms. I would say even those of girl friends because you don't know who THOSE girls would let in or who they're sailing with.

 

 

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Society is a far safer place today then it has been in the past 50 years. The only reason people think it isn't is because you hear about every story, happening everywhere, through the internet (that and of course the news loving to hype bad stories). Crime is way down from the 70-90's, more then 50% lower. Also, while it is a microcosym to some degree, it's also a society where all people are identified, have nowhere to run, and for passengers able to have disposable income to cruise. (So, it's basically society without the lowest levels). Sadly, kids are in much more danger from friends and family, and driving to the port, then they are on a ship.

 

I'm not saying have kids run anywhere at anytime, but they're safer on a ship then they are in a city. And those in cities are safer then they were over the past 50-60 years, yet none of us had any problems running around outside as kids (or have our kids do so). At some point kids have to grow up, and they're not going to learn how to handle themselves in situations, if they're never allowed to do so.

 

We stick with don't go in other people's cabins (for a variety of reasons, not just for fear of something happening to them), and let us know if anyone is coming to ours, and one of us must be there if they do. Get your own drinks, we give her charging priviledges, and if it is going to be late we want to know where you'll be.