Cruise Semi-Live? Navigator July 28th -7Nts

[Awjeez317]

1 hour ago, JK805 said:

Yeah, my lunch was in the MDR. Actually had my waiter for dinner “steal” me over to his section as the host was leading me somewhere else for the lunch during as arriving to Cabo. Bonus was the window seat, and I sat with my waiter for all MDR breakfasts and lunches after that for the rest of that cruise! (He actually grabbed all of those from my dinner table for the other meals I found out by day 3 or 4, and we laughed about that at dinner haha.)

 

Helipad for arrival into Cabo sounds delightful too, maybe I’ll try that in a few weeks. Haven’t decided on any plans yet for Cabo yet. 
 

Jaimie’s bruschetta was delicious when I had it! I got UDP once on a 3 day, just to give the specialties a try. I enjoy MDR though, so I don’t usually book specialty that often. Interesting to hear about Izumi “following” you though, but makes sense for Royal at the same time. 
 

And your spa experiences are almost tempting me to splurge and book a treatment or two sometime… (or hope to win the spa raffle 😂) but I think I’d want your person if I booked on Navigator. Sounds like a pretty good one all around!

 

i actually won a round of bingo last time on Navigator too, and if the same host is there I fully expect him to remember me from last year! But I already know the “secret” code for extra cards, in addition to all the items etc. 

Oh not sure I know the secret code! Doooo tell. 

 

I have tried so hard to remember the spelling of my spa mamma’s name but it totally eludes me. UGH. I’ll find it before I leave though because I want to give her a shout out in the survey for sure. Will let you know. I’m sure I will go back to doing the MDR again…because basically…everything is great until you get tired of it. I’m sure we will get tired of UDP eventually and just decide to save the money….and probably also decide to spend it elsewhere. Lol

 

Spa treatment before the ship leaves is the way to go IMO. Good discount and kills some time. 

 

Funny about the waiter stealing you. That is the stuff you don’t get with UDP. The personal recognition the MDR can give you really is pretty great. 

[Awjeez317]

5 hours ago, Awjeez317 said:

I have not tried that yet actually. Perhaps I will get one tonight. Think it would be okay with silver tequila? I prefer clear liquors haha.  And thanks for following alone! 

HA obviously I meant following ALONG

[Baowen]

You should always do reviews. You are a natural at it!  

Beth

[Cherful59]

15 hours ago, Awjeez317 said:

I have not tried that yet actually. Perhaps I will get one tonight. Think it would be okay with silver tequila? I prefer clear liquors haha.  And thanks for following alone! 

Yes, silver would be fine!  Hope you like it, or liked it.

Edited July 31, 2023 by Cherful59

[JK805]

10 hours ago, Awjeez317 said:

Oh not sure I know the secret code! Doooo tell. 

 

I have tried so hard to remember the spelling of my spa mamma’s name but it totally eludes me. UGH. I’ll find it before I leave though because I want to give her a shout out in the survey for sure. Will let you know. I’m sure I will go back to doing the MDR again…because basically…everything is great until you get tired of it. I’m sure we will get tired of UDP eventually and just decide to save the money….and probably also decide to spend it elsewhere. Lol

 

Spa treatment before the ship leaves is the way to go IMO. Good discount and kills some time. 

 

Funny about the waiter stealing you. That is the stuff you don’t get with UDP. The personal recognition the MDR can give you really is pretty great. 

If bingo is being run by Marcus from Brazil, he would have those in the crowd who were one number away from a bingo stand up and do hip circles and call out “ooh la la”, so that became the secret code for later days to get extra cards when purchasing the packs lol. 
 

Always good to have that variety to keep things fresh, and have the options to change things up if things get monotonous or not as fun/enjoyable. 
 

And that MDR recognition is a nice touch that keeps me going there even for breakfasts and lunches. Even those waiters you get just a couple times for the other meals can be awesome, but it was really great having “my” waiter for almost every meal the one sailing. I kinda want to see if he’s there when I go back in a couple months and maybe repeat the experience 😂

[Awjeez317]

5 hours ago, Baowen said:

You should always do reviews. You are a natural at it!  

Beth

Thanks so much! It’s actually been a lot of fun. Pretty sure I’ll keep it up! The encouragement certainly helps haha. 

[Awjeez317]

Oh by the way…Hi I’m Jesse! Hahaha. Little late on that one. This is from Cabo. Background looks fake but that’s just what happened when I changed the focus to behind me so you could actually see the trees and not a screen of blinding light. 
 

Cabo stuff coming up! 

Edited July 31, 2023 by Awjeez317

[Awjeez317]

Day 3 - Cabo

 

So I started the day feeling a little uneasy. It has been a LONG time since I was at a tender port, so I had no idea how the tender ticket process was going to go. Was it going to be a mob of people waiting outside the dining room? When the doors open at 10AM is my chief concern no longer going to be getting an early tender, but instead, trying to avoid being one of the 7 people that inevitably get trampled by my fellow VERY recently and VERY well fed passengers? How many tenders are there? Will it take an hour to get off the ship? If I do this wrong will I get off the tender and have to get right back on the last tender back to ship?

 

Soooo, yeah I decided I should probably get to the dining room half an hour early at 9:30 just in case. Keep in mind I have been on Oasis class for probably the last 6 or 7 cruises…so mobs of people is just something I’ve come to expect. 

 

I get there at the aforementioned half an hour early mark and there is…to my surprise…a line of about six people. And they are all rummaging through their bags…Not really a line actually. More of a blob. I looked past them into the dining room and there is a little table with two crew members and some little pieces of flimsy paper! The all important tender ticket! Then I saw this dude just walk into the dining room —completely avoiding the blob I was in — and get a ticket and leave! 

 

Uh….its only 9:30….what’s going on? I consider the fact that maybe I’m not in the tender blob. Maybe this is just an independent family blob and I’m just awkwardly standing next to them. That would be weird. So I just stroll into the dining room, confident as all get out (Act like you belong there!) and am greeted with a pleasant “You need tender ticket?” Why yes, I do. 

 

I was then asked if I planned on getting off the ship early or later and I’m like…is that even a question? Early please! He handed me the precious tender ticket! The incredibly significant, necessary and powerful tender ticket!

 

It was a tiny piece of paper that somehow felt cheap. I’ve never felt cheap paper before. (Well that’s not true…thanks toilet paper!) I worried that if i stuffed it into my pocket it would simply turn to dust.

 

I carefully —with two hands — lifted the tender ticket a la Indiana Jones when he replaced that gold thing with a bag of dirt he somehow thought would weigh the same as METAL only to get chased by a very angry and determined boulder. Tender 5! Winner! I think….is that good? Again…how many tenders are there? There has to be at least 10 right? 

 

Also…I have to give Royal Carrie a credit….but opening early and not telling anyone…they avoided creating a MUCH larger tender blob outside the MDR. My Time Dining on Lobster night (old lobster night of course) kind of large. All the people like me who were trying to beat aforementioned blob got to just go in…so all the on time people didn’t have to stand behind us. Credit earned Royal. Credit earned. Although definitely kind of sneaky and misleading. It worked out for me so I didn’t mind the manipulation. 

 

So now it’s like…9:32 and I don’t know what to do. I had budgeted like an hour for this…what to do with this free time? Eat? NO….I’m going to have amazing Mexican food in Mexico. Drink? Early. Too early. Even for me. I knew I had to post something about Day 2 and I knew I would be out and about for MOST of the day, as we anchored at around 12:30. So yes…post it was. 

 

I headed up to a venue I HAVE LOVED on previous ships and have had some truly incredible memories in, yet had somehow not managed to visit on this ship. The Viking Crown Lounge. What a great way to see us rolling into port and write, while also making sure I wasn’t missing the Arch moment on the helipad.  

 

I just love that space. The views and the light and honestly the best on the ship. I remember when Oasis and Allure still had that space before converting it to Suite Lounge. Those were the days. I banged out the food post I hope you all read and noticed that we were getting close…probably…I think…most likely…What? How would I know? I’ve never been to Cabo? 

 

But I guessed correctly and headed to the helipad. Surprisingly, the King of the World spot was completely empty. So yes, don’t mind if I do. Also, it took approximately 28 seconds before someone came up behind me and shouted KING OF THE WORLD directly in my ear. Dude, I’m standing here and have functioning ears. Well…they used to function. But honestly it didn’t bother me. I love some fearless enthusiasm. 

 

I got some great pictures…Tried to time lapse and failed because of the screaming guy I just mentioned. Almost dropped my phone in the ocean. Didn’t, though. So that’s good. Saw a sea lion again. They have adorable little heads. Reminds me of my dog at home. Awwwww…dog moment! 

 

Finally made my way down to the tender area…well…the seats at Schooner bar cause I’m not standing for an indeterminate amount of time no matter what it is. I also got there 30 minutes early in case they started the process at 12:30 and not 1 like their lying little sheet of paper that was delivered to my stateroom the previous day said. Again…they lied. But again…for my benefit so I didn’t mind. 

 

It took maybe 5 minutes for groups 1 and 2 to board. And they announced 3,4, AND 5. YAY. Boarding and sitting in the tender reminded me a lot of riding the bus when I lived in New York. You were crammed in and could stop, turn, rock back and forth, and want to throw up at any given moment. Again, this was around 12:30 so the amount of boats running tourists to the Arc (a path that cuts directly between the ship and our marina by the way) was alarming. What was more alarming was the amount of wake they created. Literally, I thought water was going to come over the side of the boat we were rocking so much. 

 

I was sitting in the front section too…which is deeper in the boat than the back section and I was smack dab in the middle. Physics-wise I guess that’s probably the best place to be because you don’t have the full swing as when you’re rocking on the side…but it’s didn’t feel great. 

 

There was a family of five in front of me, one of which was a little boy who was probably 6 or so. His parents got freaked out about the rocking and tried to put the life vest they had brought from their room over his head…without unbuckling it. They tried to stuff it around his cute little head but the straps…still unbuckled would simply not allow it.

 

Before they figured it out and fixed it the boy said “You’re going to make me die!” HA You’re going to bring me death…with a LIFE vest. Hilarious. 

 

Also…is this a thing? Do people bring their life vests from the room on tenders all the time? What do you do with it all day other than curse its existence while you carry it around?

 

Tangent! About five days ago i was on the phone with one of my best friends who I met living in NYC, who currently lives in South Carolina. She told me that our other best friend from NYC (we were quite the trio!) was working in Cabo the very same time I was visiting! I hadn’t seen here for about 2 years now because…well life…you know. I texted her and that’s how I figured out what I would be doing in Cabo.

 

We both work for HIlton and she works at the Hilton Los Cabos. I thought it would be fun to just lounge and eat and chat all day so I booked a room on employee rate. We also get 50% off food at certain restaurants throughout Hilton and this hotel happened to offer that discount. 

 

So the plan was to Uber to hotel and just catch up in the restaurant and bar and pool. Also, I will admit that I had a little bit of a “Oh you idiot” moment when I realized that Mexico had Uber. It had just never occurred to me because of all my time in the Caribbean islands. 

 

So when my Mom told me to be safe traveling in Mexico by myself, I could be like…Mom, I don’t think UBER is going to kidnap me. And she agreed. 

 

Not only do they have Uber but they are waaaaay better at it. I don’t know how…but the cars were always 1-2 minutes away. They got to you faster than Jimmy Johns. Freaky Fast. 

 

Anyway, I got off the tender and went through a line where they check your bag and a man to my left was offering free maps of the port. I almost always take a map. I don’t know why I didn’t. I’m thinking…how hard can it be to find the ROAD?

 

Well if you turn right instead of left….really hard. I ended walking probably for about 10 to fifteen minutes around the marina just looking for a break between the stores and restaurants that would lead me to a road..all the while being lobbied for a water taxi, or a trip to the arc, or Lovers beach, or weed or cocaine. 

 

yes that happened. Like 5 times! Maybe it’s cause I was solo? But it’s kind of funny in retrospect. Every single one of them would say “weed? cocaine?” after I walked past them by about 3 feet under their breath. Duh.

 

I just had this image…like…what are they expecting someone to suddenly stop in their tracks and just TWIRL around and announce to the world…WHAT? Why YES that’s what I need! 

 

As i said before it took me 15X longer to get to where I could finally get an uber than actually getting the uber and I was on my way. 

 

When I got there…y’all….this hotel is NICE. If you have a chance to stay there. DO IT. If you have a chance to eat there DO IT. When I checked in, they greeted me at the car and said they had a welcome drink ready for me. A hibiscus margarita. It’s after 12 so…yes please. I checked in and received a LOT of quizzical looks from the bellhops when they realized the only bag I had was my beach bag. I think one of them got in the uber to make sure. Haha. 

 

I met my friend and we ate and talked and ate and drank and swam and had about 6 hours that honestly flew by in an instant. We’re not great with calling each other on the phone, but she’s one of those friends you just pick up where you left off the second you see each other. 

 

We got guacamole and salsa, ceviche, a steak quesadilla, and three fish tacos and just family styled it. OMG THE FOOD HERE. I had ceviche so good that it made me feel like I’d never actually REALLY had ceviche before. The steak quesadilla is a steak quesadilla….not a BEEF quesadilla. They asked how we wanted it cooked! I was like…uh medium rare quesadilla please? And it WAS! Honestly its one of the best meals I’ve ever had ever.

 

I Ubered back to the ship, smacked myself on the forehead when the Uber driver dropped me off almost next to the tenders (SHOULDA GRABBED A MAP JESSE!), and quickly boarded the back of a tender. The back of the tender, combined with the fact that it wasn’t water taxi rush hour provided for a much smoother ride. 

 

I was supposed to have Chops at 7:15. It was 6:15 and I think I had my last bite of food like an hour and a half before…Decisions. I decided to let the food of Cabo be my food for the day and skipped dinner. I just wanted to get clean and relax without any rush or schedule. 

 

Thats honestly one of my favorite parts of traveling solo…You can just…do something different if you want. There is no group vote or consensus. You just…do it. 

 

Went to see another comedian who seemed to get his biggest laughs when telling the crowd they weren’t laughing enough. “I feel like I’m performing for an audience of one!” He rode a unicycle and spent the first thirty minutes unicycling around stage doing impressions. This is uncycling from Texas. This is unicyling if your British, This is unicycling from Baltimore…which I thought was a VERY odd choice of impression. As a New Yorker on a unicycle, the joke was so stereotypical and expected that I actually said it with him. 

 

AY! IM UNICYCLING HERE! 

 

Ugh.

 

It was getting really bad when he unzipped his jacket to show off his abs and made a joke about doing his laundry on them. Albeit, the guys was 60 so he took great care of himself obviously.

 

The final straw though, when he started to juggle on the unicycle. TIme to go. 

 

Gambled a bit. STILL haven’t given all the money back yet! Yay! Went to bed early because I knew I had ATVs in Puerto Vallarta tomorrow at 9:15.

 

I have this habit of putting the little cruise director prerecorded video on before bed just to see if there is something I don’t know. 

 

Well there was….Tomorrow was Mazatlan. Not Puerto Vallarta. And I had booked a Hike to the Mazatlan Light house which left at 8:15…NOT ATVs.

 

So yeah…super happy that on I put on the show. 

 

Even happier that I changed the channel before I heard a single note of that ever-longing Wash Your Hands song. Honestly its worse than KARS4KIDS.

 

See you tomorrow. Photos probably later.

[taglovestocruise]

A short musical interlude as we await your next update.....

 

 

 

[Awjeez317]

6 hours ago, taglovestocruise said:

A short musical interlude as we await your next update.....

 

 

 

I will admit that when I saw the pic of this clip I was like…OH NOOOO. But then i watched it and I’m like…OH YEAH!!! That is a beautiful musical interlude! Props to the crew. I mean that probably gets old but they don’t show it for one second do they? Thanks for the clip! 

[JK805]

Definitely enjoying the traveling vicariously through your posts - reminding me of my last Mexican Riviera trip and getting me excited for my next one at the same time! Perfect way to unwind and put work behind me by reading the updates of the adventures at the end of the day ha!

[Awjeez317]

Sorry folks, I’m going to be a few hours behind on today’s post at Mazatlan. Obviously Im doing this the next day I got hit with a quadruple Axel combo of an 8am port, an 5.5 hour excursion, a LONG port (8 to 5:30 is long for this cruise!) and LOSING an hour. UGH. Add in coming back to the ship in an open air bus in Puerto Vallarta traffic and it means that I basically just took a shower and nap and now I have dinner. I’ll try to post about my day tonight but don’t blame me if I take care of Mazatlan tomorrow morning and Puerto Vallarta in the evening…Im on vacay after all and it’s a sea day! Way easier to do this on sea days! 

 

Here’s a teaser though…there was a pretty scary injury, several discussions about poo from our excursion guide, and me getting sweatier than I knew I could possibly be.

 

Here are some photos from Cabo I forgot to post. 

[SportsFanatic]

Awesome review! If you could possibly do me a favor and check out the bar and see if they carry Makers Mark. Yes, it is on the list of alcohol they carry but when we were on another cruise line, it was also on the menu and they don’t carry it anymore.  Before I buy drink package I need to make sure they have it.  Appreciate it,

[Awjeez317]

6 hours ago, SportsFanatic said:

Awesome review! If you could possibly do me a favor and check out the bar and see if they carry Makers Mark. Yes, it is on the list of alcohol they carry but when we were on another cruise line, it was also on the menu and they don’t carry it anymore.  Before I buy drink package I need to make sure they have it.  Appreciate it,

Can you be more specific when you say “the bar?” Lol…there are like 114 of them. 😂 

 

Ill just look around tomorrow and see if i see it! 

[amby6063]

Absolutely love your review! Is Andy still on the ship? He and the guy from Brazil (who’s name I’m forgetting…) were hilarious during Bingo when we were on Navigator in April! Enjoy the rest of your cruise!
 

 

[SportsFanatic]

2 hours ago, Awjeez317 said:

Can you be more specific when you say “the bar?” Lol…there are like 114 of them. 😂 

 

Ill just look around tomorrow and see if i see it! 

Any one of them will do.  Thanks!!

[JK805]

10 hours ago, SportsFanatic said:

Awesome review! If you could possibly do me a favor and check out the bar and see if they carry Makers Mark. Yes, it is on the list of alcohol they carry but when we were on another cruise line, it was also on the menu and they don’t carry it anymore.  Before I buy drink package I need to make sure they have it.  Appreciate it,

I remember a few bars having Makers last time I was on Navigator, though that was a few months back now lol. The theatre bar and Schooner I believe had it fairly consistently. Depending on when your cruise is I can confirm when I’m in board next month too. 

[SportsFanatic]

1 hour ago, JK805 said:

I remember a few bars having Makers last time I was on Navigator, though that was a few months back now lol. The theatre bar and Schooner I believe had it fairly consistently. Depending on when your cruise is I can confirm when I’m in board next month too. 

Thank you so much! We dont cruise until January. 

[teddie]

13 hours ago, Awjeez317 said:

Sorry folks, I’m going to be a few hours behind on today’s post at Mazatlan. Obviously Im doing this the next day I got hit with a quadruple Axel combo of an 8am port, an 5.5 hour excursion, a LONG port (8 to 5:30 is long for this cruise!) and LOSING an hour. UGH. Add in coming back to the ship in an open air bus in Puerto Vallarta traffic and it means that I basically just took a shower and nap and now I have dinner. I’ll try to post about my day tonight but don’t blame me if I take care of Mazatlan tomorrow morning and Puerto Vallarta in the evening…Im on vacay after all and it’s a sea day! Way easier to do this on sea days! 

 

Here’s a teaser though…there was a pretty scary injury, several discussions about poo from our excursion guide, and me getting sweatier than I knew I could possibly be.

 

Here are some photos from Cabo I forgot to post. 

Sure!  Just when you get me drooling over the food porn, you stop!  

Enjoy your sea day--it sounds as if it is well-deserved, with the poo talk and the sweating and all 🙂  Patiently waiting.

 

Teddie

[BBQ Bacon]

Loving the reviews.  Can't wait to get on the ship come September.  It's agony waiting though so these reviews are helping.

[Awjeez317]

OKAY! So I’m back and relaxing on the balcony so I can do some catch up! First things first, thanks so much for all of you following along. I am grateful for the positivity and am extremely happy to be providing the same “Vicarious Live Throughs” (VLT’s??) that I have sought out so many times before. 

 

Alright, so if you’ll remember…the night before Mazatlan I thought we were going to Puerto Vallarta the next day. SUPER happy i turned on the little Cruise Director TV show so that I didn’t miss my excursion. Also, you’ll remember I did the one thing you’re never supposed to do on a cruise. I skipped dinner. Although…after seeing all that food I ate in Cabo, you guys can probably understand a little bit better. 

 

I woke up around 6:45 just to be safe and realized I had signed up for a Light House Hike and didn’t eat the night before…and its like 400 degrees out. And humid. And genetically….lets just say….I’m a sweater.  I sweat in an instant. Like…breathe on me…and Im sweating. So I decided to check out the Diamond Lounge. First time in there, which is weird because it is located directly below me. It’s one staircase and about 3 minutes away. 

 

I enjoy this Diamond Lounge more than the Wonder’s for sure. Yeah its a bit smaller, but its a smaller ship. This one has windows though and doesn’t feel Like the Diamond Cave Lounge, which is nice early in the morning. Had myself a little strawberry parfait (no picture necessary lol) and I toasted a piece of bread, but three pieces of their already room temperature sweating (hey like me!) cheddar cheese on top of said hot toasted bread. The room temp cheese actually works in my favor because the toast is actually hot enough to melt it. And then I put some prosciutto on it for a little open faced brekkie sandie. PROTEIN ACHIEVED. Albeit salt and fat achieved as well, but hey I had a parfait! 

 

Small note: does every single Diamond Lounge have a permanent resident who sits right in the middle and talks on the phone so loud they must actually believe they live there. Cause this one had one. I feel like they all have one. This dude had a ten minute conversation with someone about their Corvette…..fascinating. 

 

Went to the room to get my hiking clothes on! Hiking clothes on a cruise, by the way, consists of things that air goes through easily due to aforementioned expertise in sweating. And dark clothes weirdly. Dark clothes in the sun? Well, trust me…if I wear white…I’m a walking wet tee shirt contest that’s constantly getting buckets of water thrown on me. Also, some 5.5 inch inseam shorts. Who wears short shorts?! Hiker Jesse. Again, the theory being…more higher air to skin ratio.

 

I sprayed about half the can of sunscreen on myself and felt ready to brace the day. It’s at that point I looked out the balcony and saw a really cool mountain with a little white thing on it. Hmmm. That’s interesting.

 

Excursion is at 8:15. Meet up in the theater. I think this is the first time I’ve ever met up for an excursion in the theater, and now I realize it’s because it’s for the excursions that leave like…THE MOMENT we dock. Not too many people in the theater (makes sense…8:00am and drink packages typically don’t hang out), so I was given a yellow sticker with 23 and told to go sit in a row with about 15-20 people if I had to guess. They called our group and we walked outside to do what I hate the most….stand on the pier and wait. Oh, the stragglers. At least our excursion director Cristobal started the form and sign in sheet while we waited for two more. They arrived before we were done so I should retract my previous annoyance. They added no time at all to the excursion. Cristobal Gave us yet ANOTHER sticker. This one was orange and rectangular. SO i placed it at the bottom of circular yellow 23 so it looked like a sun setting! Haha. Oh the things we do to amuse ourselves. 

 

There were 18 of us (i was close!) and everyone was ready to go. I was surprised to notice that I was not the guy with the shortest shorts. Harumph. The sign in sheet was funny too. They made you list your age next to your cabin number, which everyone had something to say about. It also proves I am terrible at guessing ages. People were 50 I would have guessed were 40. People were 30 I would have guessed 40. I mean…Im 37 and I look 22. HAHAHHAHAHAH.

 

Cristobal Informed us that because the Mazatlan port is a commercial port we can not legally walk to the actual port entrance but had to take a shuttle — or very large golf cart towing another golf cart. This makes the 3rd time I had to take a thing to get to the thing (LAX Uber to hotel, Cabo tender, and now this) So mannnnny steps. As we drove to the entrance I had major cruise embarkation Port of Los Angeles flashbacks. Once again, SURROUNDED with shipping containers. And oddly a LOT of brand new cars. It’s really weird seeing the same car hundreds of times just parked next to each other waiting for some owner somewhere. 

 

Anyway we got to the port entrance and Cristobal Told us that we were going to take a break (this becomes a theme), and I’m like…WHAT? ALREADY? We haven’t even hiked yet. THEN he tells us that this is the best option for a bathroom for the rest of our time. While hiking to the lighthouse there is no where to stop —apparently its not the slip off behind a tree kind of hike — and that there are three bathrooms at the base of the hike that are…and Im quoting here…”are okay only in case of emergencies in my opinion.”

 

Yeah, I don’t want anything to do with an Emergency Only Bathroom. Dear lord what those stalls have seen. So, even though I don’t need to, I do what my parents always told us as kids right before any form of longer car journey…EMPTY OUT! That might be an overshare…sorry. But if you have kids that always have to pee like 20 minutes into a roadtrip after they said they didn’t have to go when you were leaving…that phrase really works! 

 

When we’re all out of the bathroom. Cristobal Tells us a little bit about the lighthouse. It is the highest elevated working natural lighthouse on the planet. Ummmmm. Ooookay. I asked what a natural light house was…thinking the whole structure was like…carved out of a mountain or something. Nope…it means they put a regular sized light house on a mountain, instead of building a whole tower. Apparently Gibraltar was number 1 for a LONG time, but it has since stopped actually serving as a light house, so Mazatlan for the win! 

 

Cristobal Points behind him and something in the distance. Remember that tall cool mountain with the tiny white thing on it I mentioned before…yeah. That’s where we are going 

 

Um, yikes. Okay, yeah. Sure. Mmmhmmm. Yup. 

 

He tells us it’s only a 1.2 mile hike for the whole round trip. A lot of us, sighed in relief and said…oh that’s not bad! Oh good. But then he says the whole thing is uphill, and the second half is over 300 stairs. Relief gone. Evaporated like I wish the sweat on my forehead would…Yes Im already sweating and were just standing outside. It’s like 95 degrees with a RealFeel of about 107 and there is NO BREEZE AT ALL. 

 

The elevation? Well, the lighthouse is just under 550 feet up. Some quick math. Half the hike is .6 miles. 550 feet is about 70 stories. So we have to walk up 70 stories in roughly a half mile? Cool….cool cool cool. 

 

We walk through the cruise port and get on YET another mode of transportation, three open air red trucks. We plot into groups and board. I know it’s open air, but at least it’s moving. So manufactured breeze is better than no breeze at all, I say. 

 

When we get there, I see this really cool stone sign that says “Fero Mazatlan.” I should tell you that Cristobal Is really cool by the way. He has a great attitude, is really supportive and genuinely wants to teach us something about his culture. He often would mix Spanish words in and teach them to us. Even when he was counting us to make sure we were all there and not…you know…fallen off the side of a mountain…he would have us count out loud and in Spanish. He tells us that Fero is actually a word not just used for Lighthouse….but it could be a flashlight, a lighter, or a match. Anything that you turn on for light. Thats cool and I didn’t know that! Learning and sweating YAY! 

 

He tells us that we should all take a picture now in front of the sign if we want. He says…definitely do it before and not after because you will be sweaty messes (uh, WILL be?). He tells this hilarious story of this woman who was, as he said, rather attractive, who said she would take a picture after the fact. She didn’t listen basically. And apparently, when she reached the bottom and got her picture taken, she did NOT realize that she had lost one of her fake eyelashes! HAHA…wait…We are going to sweat so much that things that have been like…glued on can fall off?????

 

Every snaps pictures and it’s pretty quick except for this one group of three that asked for a group shot took it — and then promptly asked for individual photos too. And multiples. I wouldn’t have been irritated normally…but I was scouring the area looking for shade and cursing myself for not having a hat. 

 

Also 1 bottle of water down. 

 

These three people shall be called the Cell Phone Brigade —or the CPB — from now on, as they were literally never where they were supposed to be because they were on their phones…try to take photos, trying to see where they were on a map, trying to track fitness or something. IM all for technology. But like….lets live a little too. 

 

We start the walk, which I am grateful for because even though its only 9AM and its scorching and I’m sweating, at least were moving forward. Let’s get this show on the road. Cristobal Says we can’t bring any food on the trail and that the people at the gate will check our bags. He says they are Mazatlan police so if you have anything..ANYTHING AT ALL…that maybe you purchased to eat or SMOKE later…

 

he pauses

 

Then give it to him because he is happy to take it off your hands. HAHA. One of the CPB - who wasn’t listening to the obvious joke - said “Wait, I have a muffin is that okay?”

 

Cristobal Says “a green muffin?” HA

 

We’ve started to walk and it’s definitely a path that is uphill but honestly not too bad. About 45 seconds on the trail….we stop. Seriously!?

 

Cristobal Wants to tell us about some of the local Flora and Fauna. And I’m actually pretty down for that. I just didn’t appreciate the Flora and Fauna not growing in a shaded area! He points out an Aloe Vera plant and tells us in Mexico they call it Seville (Sa-Ve-yah) because the aloe looks like saliva. Apparently they also put it in water and drink its naturall when they have stomach issues or heart burn. Hmmm…didn’t know that. He then points out Agave and tells us about how Tequila is kind of like Champagne in France. It’s not what they call the product there because Tequila is actually a place. The place is comes from. Tells us a bit about Mezcal and then asks us all to turn around. 

 

We do, and there is a very large, very ugly, abandoned industrial complex of some kind. There are two large dome thingies next to a square building. Cristobal Says “You know about savile plant, and the agave plant, and that is the CACA Plant. HAHA Sewage treatment jokes. 

 

“That plant is used to make CACA Chanel.” He points to the second dome and says “Thats CACA Chanel Number 2” HIlarious! 

 

Okay, back to walking and sweating…well I never stopped sweating so…back to walking and continuing to sweat! I start to see signs that make how many meters up we are. We get to the first one (100m) yay! We get to the second one (200m) ::breathes hard:: yay! 

 

Time to take a break says Cristobal. So many breaks! Thankfully there is a gorgeous view and two small trees that are about as tall as i am and have some shade. I huddle underneath one and listen from the ground. And then I nearly jump off my skin when the ground moved next to me! Extremely sleeping and very hot, there is a stray cat just chilling…this mountain is full of them by the way.Cristobal tells us that sadly, they rely on people bringing them food and have no idea how to find food for themselves. So when the pandemic struck and no one could use the trail, many of them died. How awful. 

 

We’re on our way again! For about 10 minutes. Another break. I would be annoyed but were about 400M in now and were alllllllll starting to need the breaks. It’s then I decide to trust the break timing of Cristobal. This time when we stop he points out an iguana in a tree. Thats nice. He also chooses places with shade for breaks. Which is nicer. 

 

Finally we get to the 600M mark. Halfway! We pause for a break. I pour a liquid IV into a water bottle and chug it, considering I have probably sweat three bottles of water at least. My whole shirt is now a different color. The napkin I took from the bathroom at port is soaked and starting to tear…My legs are hurting. But man the views are gorgeous. And the sense of accomplishment doesn’t suck. 

 

Cristobal then tells us were are halfway up! YAY. And then what he says next makes the whole group collectively groan. 

 

“Okay guys! That was the easy part!”

 

Ummmmmmmmmm

 

More after lunch! I gotta get to Chops! 

[gambler]

Enjoying your review. Thank-you

[Awjeez317]

So there I was, already sopping wet, being told the hard part is coming. 336 stairs. Oof that’s a lot of stairs. Cristobal tells us that we will stop three times on the way up. That when we get to the last rest we only have like 5% to go and to not give up. He then decides to tell us that locals consider this an achievement to brag about and quickly realize that no one else sweating their faces off has a little excursion sticker on. They all look as rough (okay not as rough) as Im sure as I look, and THEY LIVE HERE. Dear. God. 

 

Oh yeah, forgot to mention, right before we took the break, there are two EZ-UP tents set up. One is selling water and Powerade for like 15 bucks a piece. And the other one is a guy at a table next to an ATV and a sign that says EMERGENCIA. Thats bodes well…

 

So up the stairs we go. And oh man are they some stairs. The first two hundred are pretty deep stairs apparently. As in you have to take a step on flat ground before getting to the next step. This sounds nice until you realize that means the same foot/leg/hip is taking every step. This gets uncomfortable…so you do a little shimmy mini step to switch to the other side. This is fine, until that side hurts and you have to do it again. I tried to do the shimmy mini step every step but you just look down right ridiculous taking 8 inch steps, like you’re a cartoon spy tiptoeing into a bank or something. 

 

About halfway up the first 100 stairs I realize I am going way too fast. I need to chill. Chilling is impossible literally. It’s Hades up here people. I just mean slow down a bit. Pace. Yeah, pacing will help. It does…for about 4 seconds. Finally, Cristobal calls for a break when we get to a landing between steps that has a ledge to sit on (praise!) and trees to shade said ledge (PRAISE!) I commence in spraying my very white skin with more sunscreen, chug a very Luke warm water and try to catch my breath. It’s a this time that Cristobal, asked one of us to feel his tea. Huh?

 

He pulls out his bottle of iced tea from his back pack and it is actually iced. Like…cold? I didn’t know Yeti made back packs. I decide to see how much they are and then decide not to waste the time cause I don’t think I will EVER do this again. 

 

Then he reveals his secret. An ice pack. We all stare at like it’s a certificate for free cruises for life. He then tells us he has five of these in his back pack. FIVE. Cristobal has been holding out! Before mutiny begins, he goes on to say that he brings these because he is in charge of taking care of us, and if any of us feel dizzy or light headed that we shouldn’t act strong and tell him immediately. Apparently there are three effective ways to avoid heat stroke quickly and they all involve an ice pack. 

 

Put it on your head and then put your hat on—don’t have a hat soooo yeah. 

 

Put it on the back of your neck. Okay I knew that one. God that sounded good. 

 

Put it in your armpit. Okay that’s a new one, but ewwwww how many pits have those ice packs breached? Apparently cooling the artery there is one of the fastest ways to cool down. 

 

Im pretty sure everyone is about to jump for said ice packs of glory when he reminds us that he only has five and really only wants to use them in emergencies. Okay fine, you win safety. 

 

Someone from the CPB walks up to me and says “wait did he say something about ice?” They were strayed off from the group taking selfies. Ugh. 

 

We start up the second leg of the stairs and get about halfway and i need to take a little break of my own. I notice about 4 people take my lead and also stop for a moment. Im drinking some water when I hear a CRACK. 

 

I look up and sadly see that a lovely man in his 60s who was in my open air transportation group (shout out group 3!!!) to the lighthouse base, is on the ground. He apparently slipped and fell HARD on his knee cap on the stone stairs. And you could hear it. We all surround him and pepper him with “oh my gods” and “are you okays” and “What can I dos.” It’s nice to know that people are still good at the core. I believe that. 

 

His wife sits next to him and Cristobal tells him to rest, gives him an ice pack and says to stay there and if they feel they can make it to the top then take their time and they will see them there. “We will spend about 15 minutes up top so hopefully we see you there, if not then we will meet back here.” 

 

The guy is grateful for the rest and ice pack and says that’s A OK with him. I feel bad. Probably not as bad as he does. My dad once banged his knee into a concrete bench that stupidly blended in the walkway we were on and it hurt him for WAY more than a day. The lady next to me said she heard it too and thought it had to be a hairline fracture at least. Ouch. 

 

Okay so my burning legs and sweat aren’t SO bad I realize. Off we go. It’s at this point that are tightly clumped group of climbers spreads further and further out, with more people taking their own breaks. We don’t need your approval to stop Cristobal! When we get to the final landing, the first step says 300 on it in white paint. OMG. Only 36 more to go. I decide I will ask for an ice pack when we get to the top. As a reward of course. 

 

We rest, and it takes about 10 minutes for the whole crew to get there (minus knee guy and his wife). A young lady is one of the last ones up and she plops down and says “This is literally the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.” Girl, preach. 

 

Sensing this could be a problem, the ever attentive Cristobal scuttles over and hands her an ice pack and tells her to put it between her hat and her head. She’s a fair skinned human and she looked RED. 

 

Okay, maybe I wont use an ice pack as a reward. That’s two down…

 

Cristobal wants to count his ducklings as always and notices that three of us are missing. He gets very concerned…until someone points out the CPB off the side huddled over their phones. One of them looks like she is using her shirt to provide sun for her phone. FOR HER PHONE. 

 

We set off on the final stretch and it really is the shortest leg but feels the hardest. As I get to the top and look out over the INCREDIBLE view I see Cristobal and I full on thrust both fists in the air to declare Victory! 

 

He calls us over to an area under two trees with a bench. I was not the first up so the bench is taking. Whatever…oh what’s that right there? Ground? Looks like a bench to me! Dirt and rock never felt so comfortable. 

 

Cristobal waits a few minutes for the last of the group to join us at the top. He starts to tell us about Mazatlan. How tourism is everything to them and how he appreciated our business. He asks us to fill out a survey which we were more than happy to do. We all got a little piece of paper and filled it out. I handed mine back with about 100 apologies that it was wet. He then tells us a little more about the city and points out into the ocean to two very large rocks popping up out of the ocean. He asks us why do we think they are white? Those of us who can breathe still don’t know the answer so he says he going to give of a little test. Multiple choice!

 

A. We are near where the Titanic sank so they are icebergs. HA yeah right, that’s a different ocean and if that were an iceberg we would all be looking around for a hang glider to go lay are whole bodies on them. 

 

B. Salt. The ocean is salt, waves crash against it all the time. When the water evaporates then the salt is left. This sound possible, but then I consider rain…Salt would wash away. Nope. 

 

Before he gets to C he asks us all to make sure we keep this a secret. Top secret. Like you can’t have your phones up at all. Put them away he says. 

 

And I’m not kidding when I say that one of the CPB actually lifts up her phone. To him, it looks like she is recording. He kind of politely says something, she keeps her phone up. Finally, in the only moment of frustration from Dear Cristobal, he gets a little firm with her. He doesn’t want to be recorded. 

 

Im sitting right behind her so I can see that she is actually just ignoring him and taking a selfie which unfortunately has just enough Sweaty Jesse in it that someone is gonna zoom in on the photo back at home and be like…”who is that mess?!”

 

With pure divine intervention, her phone goes black. It’s too hot to take photos. HAHA. The phone needs an ice pack! Well Samsung can stay hot, cause she’s not getting one. 

 

C. The drug cartels fly over this part of Mexico with their planes of cocaine and many of them have had to ditch cargo randomly. Thus, staining the rocks white. 

 

We are all silent and then he laughs and weirdly says “NO, if that were cocaine you’d see 1000s of people swimming towards it” HA 

 

D. The rocks are great places for birds to rest. Birds eat fish. Fish have bones. Birds turn fish bones into a liquid and poop it out white. The rocks are covered with bird poo. 

 

Ding Ding Ding! And ewwwwwwww. Never knew rocks covered in bird caca would be so photogenic. He takes us over to another landing and offers to take photos of us with the whole city (and or cruise ship that looks soooo little) behind us. It’s a trophy of a picture.

 

I joke with Cristobal and ask if I lost any of my eye lashes. He laughs and take three pictures that are  absolute nightmares. Yet, I have never been so proud to look such a wreck. I love those ugly photos. 

 

I realize now that my shorts are a different color. And before you think something is about to happen related to poo again…it’s sweat. Yes…my whole shirt is a different color and my SHORTS are sweaty all the way to bottom. The sweat from my shirt has continued its pathway down and I am actually soaked head to two. 

 

I realize IM going to have to hang all these clothes to dry in my bathroom…oh my poor stateroom attendant when he walks in there. 

 

We finish the photo shoot pretty quickly because the CPB can only use 1 of their phones to take photos. Another one has bit the heat bullet. They were also —for the first time that day — exactly where they needed to be. It was a photo op after all. 

 

We head down the mountain and discover that knee guy and his wife and nowhere to be found. We stop by the emergency services…no one is there. Uhhhhhh. Not good. Cristobal jaunts forward and says they are probably at the bottom. 

 

It feels good to be done. I loved it, but I was wet head to toe people! Nobody needs a break on the way down, but they doesn’t stop Cristobal from stopping us to point out a hummingbird sitting on a branch. Huh….I’ve never seen one not flying before. SO LITTLE. 

 

But we’re all like “yeah yeah nice hummingbird let’s get the hell off this mountain!” —but nicer than that. We get to the bottom and find knee guy on the curb with his knee wrapped and dripping. The store owner at the base packed a ziploc with ice and wrapped it for him while he waited. Super nice. Everyone here is just so nice. 

 

Having all the little ducklings back Cristobal has us count off again to make sure we are all there. You guessed it…we only got to fifteen. Across the street the CPB was back in front of the Faro Mazatlan sign taking photos again. Apparently, their phones have gotten a second wind. 

 

Cristobal had told us before the tour that if we wanted to he would tell the drivers to go to Old Town Mazatlan to drop off those of us who wanted to walk around and sight see before continuing to the ship. Before we had embarked on the Saharan Trek up a mountain, I had thought….oooooo yeah Im going to do that! Most of did Im sure. 

 

Now that it’s over, Cristobal asks who wants to go to Old Town —knowing you would have to walk back to the ship…which is a mile. 

 

Crickets. No one said anything. “You just want to go back to the ship?”

 

If you have never heard 18 exasperated and relieved people say “Yes” at the same time, it’s pretty funny. And also…thank god. 

 

We climb in the back with the rest of group 3, which is me, the knee guy and his wife, and the CPB. Number 1 of the CPB looks at me and says “So, what, are you cruising alone?”

 

My go to response triggers: “Nope. I’m solo…Im with all you fine people!”

 

I’ve never been so grateful for how FRIGID Royal Caribbean keeps its little security check area when you get back on the ship. Though it only took about 20 seconds for the shivering to start. After all…when you are literally sopping wet…blasting AC feels like about 10,000 ice packs. 

 

Back in the room, I think i just plopped into bed (after putting a towel down. Your welcome cabin attendant.) and stared at the ceiling for about an hour. But then I looked out my balcony and saw that little white building on that mountain again. 

 

Hey, I did that. Yeah. I did that. 

 

Then my stomach made played an orchestra. God I was starving. Izumi again for dinner! 

 

Tell you guys about it in a bit! 

Edited August 3, 2023 by Awjeez317

[3yorkies]

On 7/27/2023 at 8:50 PM, Awjeez317 said:

Well here we go.

 

This is my first attempt at a live cruise review/update/word-TikTok ever….so obviously it has to start with the obligatory statement of a writer‘s insecurity that I may be terrible at this and you should forgive me. So…

 

I may be terrible at this.

 

Please forgive me. 

 

I am writing this from the Hilton Long Beach in Cali (a nice hotel super close to the cruise port with a pool!), where the only thing that can stop the vision of my perfect upcoming cruise is the dense smog covering this massive city within a city within a city. 

 

I would speak the typical “not so hot take” and say I don’t like LA because of the traffic and the issues and the problems and the issues on top of issues. But honestly. All I hate is LAX. I haven’t spent enough time here or seen NEARLY enough to form an opinion about the city. 

 

LAX however. Is the worst. I hate any airport in which i have to take a shuttle to get to an Uber/Lyft. My father would call it a “communist plot.”

 

LAX is the worst. 

 

Well. Flying out on Wednesday from the east coast at 6pm with a connecting flight to Charlotte and then to LAX is the worst. 

 

Well….flight delays are the worst. 

 

Well…pilot shortages that cause the delays are the worst. 

 

No, finally getting on your LAX bound flight only to find that the cabin is 87 degrees is the worst. 

 

No no, getting to your hotel three hours late and at 2 am PST when you live on EST (that’s 5am people!) is the worst. 

 

Actually, I should check myself. DH would probably tell me to “Get on the Relaxy Taxi” — a statement he has probably said to dozens of people on embarkation day who are more determined to find the things they dislike about the ship than enjoy the fact that THEY ARE NOT WORKING or THEY ARE NOT AT HOME and are — in fact — ON A VACATION. 

 

So Relaxy Taxi here I come. 

 

Tomorrow I get on the Navigator of the Seas. It is a seven night cruise to three places I have never been to.  Cabo, Puerto Vallarta, and Mazatlan. I’m also extremely excited to see this newly amped ship. This is the first Voyager class ship that has been Amped so I’m quite intrigued. 

 

I got the Dining package…because honestly when you do it once….you kind of can’t NOT do it. When I checked the app Chops was $63 a person for one meal! The package is a steal at that rate. PLUS I don’t have to find out if I like or hate the new menu in the main dining room. Better than a drink package in my mind. Also the five drinks from DP benefits help. 

 

And casino drinks help too. 

 

Casino losses do not. 

 

I guess it’s a wash. 

 

DH is busy with his business at home so I am venturing out solo (double points! If only I could book a suite it would be triple!). 

 

One would think…why in the %!*& would anyone get on a cruise to Mexico at the end of July???

 

Well, when I landed here…its was 15 degrees cooler than where I left from. So……yeah….we broke the planet. 

 

I am pretty sure I will have a small amount of TKA though. Tiny Kid Aversion. It may drive me to the Solarium more than I think, but luckily the Voyager class has an open air Solarium that is actually adult only.

 

(Nothing against kids at ALL! I just don’t have any of my own….sooooooooo…..yeah.) 

 

I say it is a SEMI Live update because honestly, I will try with all my might to update this everyday and also post some photos. But if I stray….don’t be mad at me. IM ON A CRUISE. I’ll update it all eventually when I get home. 

 

But if I stray…don’t be mad at me. IM BACK AT WORK PEOPLE. 

 

More tomorrow. I think. Yeah….

 

Definitely more tomorrow…probably. 

Love solo cruising and I am also allergic to kids, lol.   The solarium, bars, and casino are my havens.  

[patattack]

I am loving your review!!

 

Pat