Please help a straight father out...

[cruisingpastor]

My wife and I have four adult children. I am trying to plan a family cruise for all of us for January of 2025. We thought we had a cruise picked out, and then my daughter's wife, who is a trans woman, expressed concern about traveling to Florida. She is concerned about their bathroom laws and their personal safety if they act like themselves while in Florida pre and post cruise. I know from reading these boards and from the people I meet on ships that thousands of LGBTQ persons pass through the cruise ports every week without incident. But I also know that as a straight man I'm looking at this from a position of privilege. Would some trans people who have cruised from Florida in the past year or two be willing to share their experiences with me? What is the reality for trans people and same sex couples visiting Florida (especially the Ft Lauderdale area)? Are there other North American ports that are more LGTBQ friendly? Thank you for anything you are willing to share

[Vibe]

Thanks for being a supportive and caring parent. Your daughter and daughter’s wife will be fine in the major areas in Florida especially in Fort Lauderdale which happens to have a very large LGBTQIA population. 
Enjoy your cruise and make many happy memories with your family.

[CDNPolar]

I hope you get the support you need here.  I don't have the personal knowledge to help out but I am sure that there are many here that can share their experiences.

[mt234]

what an awesome father you are to support and respect your children this way. as a floridian i can say “ nothing to worry about”… but remember it’s not about you feeling confident that there will be bo problems it’s about your daughter and her wife feeling safe and protected. to an outsider ( not from this state) florida can definitely come off as being full of aggressive maga maniacs, and you may run into that. if it’s an alternative consider cruising out of maybe new orleans, new york, or los angeles…. all cities known for their hospitality to our community 

[RICHARD@SEA]

I've been coming to Ft Lauderdale area for many years...there is a very large LGBTQ community & also a larger MAGA population.... 

I stay near the beach & have never had a problem being w my partner in any of the hotels & Port of Everglades.  The only time I did encounter a problem was once when I needed to use  a restroom we stopped at a McDonalds...the men's room had a line while the women's room was vacant.

I quickly went into the women's room (it had several stalls). Just as I was washing my hands a security guy banged on the door & said if I didn't come out immediately he would call the police. 

I would describe myself as a 60 yo straight looking gay male(whatever that means - but women do hit on me from time to time).

Florida is a strange place - so right wing & yet Ft Lauderdale/ Ft Liquordale is left leaning and very  gay friendly.

[cruisingpastor]

Thank you for your responses. I shared the thread with my daughter and her wife, and they found it helped clarify their thoughts. They also got a kick out of the fact I actually posted here and the ads I now get when I log in to Cruise Critic as a result of this post. I'm good with that.

[RICHARD@SEA]

maybe your daughter duped you - she just wants you to pickup some fashion tips from the men in Wilton Manors!!!!

 

Have fun

[roxannex]

I was worried about this with my daughter. Honestly, I had resolved not to travel to Florida or the other states with highly restrictive laws against trans people because I did not want to give them my money. But my mom is 81, and she really wanted to go on a family vacation before my daughter goes to college. Cruising just made the most sense, and the most cruises on the east coast, especially the newer ships, leave from Florida.

 

My goal was to spend the least possible time in Florida. So, we are flying in early that morning and then going right back to the airport as soon as we disembark. My daughter passes very well, so I doubt we will have issues. But I will not let her go to the bathroom by herself, if she has to. We will spend the least time possible in Florida.

 

It makes me sad. We used to go to Florida all of the time, but I don't feel my family is safe there right now. 

[CDNPolar]

14 hours ago, roxannex said:

 

 

It makes me sad. We used to go to Florida all of the time, but I don't feel my family is safe there right now. 

 

I am Canadian and live in Canada.  We are not without angry people in Canada, but it is not on the same level as the USA.  (Or how the media portrays it in the USA)

 

I spent 17 years driving my Mom to Florida where she would spend the winter and I would fly home.  Her community had weekly breakfasts at a local restaurant and I was SHOCKED at the type of prejudiced, bigoted, and openly discriminatory conversations that went on during these breakfasts.  No shame, no filter at all.

 

There was one time I flew in just before Christmas and we went for breakfast.  I was sitting across the table from my mom.  One of the most vocal of the group walked in and  boomed out the most racist statement I think I have ever heard.  My head immediately flipped in her direction and my mom kicked me under the table.  Not lightly.  She looked at me and said quietly:  "I have to spend the next few months here...."  Which basically meant DON'T SAY ANYTHING.  Because I would have.

 

I am sorry, I don't like to generalize any people, political party, culture, race, or kind of "identifier" but Florida for me is not a state that I would feel comfortable in, or spend my money in today.  

 

Lucky for us, our focus is anything but the itineraries that leave from Florida so there is little to no chance that I will ever go there again.

[jiff3]

On 11/3/2023 at 9:03 AM, cruisingpastor said:

My wife and I have four adult children. I am trying to plan a family cruise for all of us for January of 2025. We thought we had a cruise picked out, and then my daughter's wife, who is a trans woman, expressed concern about traveling to Florida. She is concerned about their bathroom laws and their personal safety if they act like themselves while in Florida pre and post cruise. I know from reading these boards and from the people I meet on ships that thousands of LGBTQ persons pass through the cruise ports every week without incident. But I also know that as a straight man I'm looking at this from a position of privilege. Would some trans people who have cruised from Florida in the past year or two be willing to share their experiences with me? What is the reality for trans people and same sex couples visiting Florida (especially the Ft Lauderdale area)? Are there other North American ports that are more LGTBQ friendly? Thank you for anything you are willing to share

I have not seen any enforcement in Central Florida of those ridiculous laws. I have seen unisex individual bathrooms popping up everywhere. Except I'm not transgender, I'm just gay so not the best source for in depths info.

[CDNPolar]

On 11/23/2023 at 7:48 AM, jiff3 said:

I have not seen any enforcement in Central Florida of those ridiculous laws. I have seen unisex individual bathrooms popping up everywhere. Except I'm not transgender, I'm just gay so not the best source for in depths info.

 

I have thought of this many times.... I am not transgender, I am a sis gender gay male.  I don't particularly look gay, so I enter the men's restroom without thinking and have never had any issue.  
 

Not sure it is the same for anyone transgendered.

 

I am however a huge supporter of non-gendered restrooms everywhere.  Give me a toilet behind a closed and locked door and a communal sink and I am happy!

[DallasGuy75219]

On 11/4/2023 at 6:17 PM, mt234 said:

if it’s an alternative consider cruising out of maybe new orleans, new york, or los angeles…. all cities known for their hospitality to our community 

I'd avoid New Orleans.  While the city itself very much has an anything goes attitude, New Orleans cruises draw primarily from the southern and southeast US (except for Florida, which already has a plethora of homeports), where unfortunately small-mindedness can still be common.

 

Before I get flamed for stereotyping, I'm a gay man born and raised in the Deep South and often cruise out of New Orleans as I have family relatively close.  

 

For OP, it may depend on how obvious it is that his DIL is trans, but I was among a group of about 100 gay men on a cruise out of New Orleans about a month ago, and some other passengers were less than pleased (and vocal about it) to be on the same sailing with the group.

[SoloAlaska]

You sound like such an amazing dad. I never could come out to my bio dad or his family because of their conservative views. If you’re going in the night before stay in LGBTQ friendly area. Don’t pit stop in rural areas. Your daughter can also accompany her wife to the washroom as a “friend” and run some interference if a situation arises.