Zandaam passenger overboard...search underway

[docksider21]

When all hope is lost, when one's mood is so low that even seeing the sun rise one more morning is just way too much to bear, then all that person will be thinking about is flicking that switch and making that life go away.

 

Thanks for the helpful insights. Usually the person does not really want their life to go away, just the pain. Whether real or imagined, perceived pain IS pain. And they have convinced themselves that the only way to stop the pain is to stop living.

 

The 'why' doesn't matter, the 'how' doesn't matter....what matter's is that this lady is now at peace with herself, which is probably something she has not been able to be for some time.

 

The why might matter, in that it may increase our understanding, and we might help the next person. But the "why" for this lady is not something that we will be able to find or solve in this venue.

 

Thank you again, for such helpful comments, Goldryder. We never know when a person in this degree of distress will cross the path of our life. We need to know what to look, how to respond, and how NOT to respond.

[brucory]

I was coming home from the cottage last week on the busiest highway in Canada and it was closed one way as a guy was hanging near death on an overpass. There were police at the top talking to him. I don't know what happened to that fellow but I could only feel sympathy for him. These people are mentally ill and need help. Unfortunately they often don't get it in time.

 

One of the pieces of information that came from the film "The bridge" about suicides from the Golden Gate Bridge was the commonality of mental illness and complete emotional chaos that these people were going through. The majority were at the end of a long journey of misery, loneliness, and despair...

 

A very sad topic indeed...

[YeaYeaYea]

I agree, if you are that desperate to kill yourself, don't involve complete strangers. This is a very selfish thing to do, with no regard for the other people on the ship or the rescue people.

 

She should have tied herself to a tree in the middle of the forest with a steak tied to her neck letting out distress calls to alert wolves that she is there ready to die. She should have also though of the noise she will make dieing maybe upsetting the other animals now she needs to gag herself.

 

 

:eek:Those poor STRANGERS she didn't take concideration for before she ENDED HER LIFE!!!!!!!

 

 

WHAT are you talking about????!!!!????:confused:

[durangoscots]

Does no one think it odd that she ordered room service at midnight and then jumped overboard???? Sounds a bit suspicious to me.

 

 

Not at all, I knew of a woman who went shopping for clothes for a vacation, purchased several new outfits and shoes and then overdosed that night - and left a note. You just can't tell how the mind is working in these circumstances.

 

Susan

[serendipity1499]

So sad. Unfortunately it does seem like a suicide. I really don't understand this sort of thing. I get why people sometimes feel they have no options. Okay. However, why involve anyone else? The Coast Guard, the ship's crew, friends and family onboard, other passengers... If you truly feel you need to end things then please, do so without jeopardizing (the search and rescue team) and without traumatizing others.

 

Quote Originally Posted by JerseyJaguar

I agree, if you are that desperate to kill yourself, don't involve complete strangers. This is a very selfish thing to do, with no regard for the other people on the ship or the rescue people.Unquote

 

 

I can't believe you both really mean this! :( Obviously you have never had a family member or a friend who's had either a debilitating Mental or Physical Illness..

As Goldryder & others have so aptly put it, I've never heard of a suicide which does not involve strangers..Have you ever thought about the 911 operators, Policemen, Firemen,Ambulance & Hospital personnell, (all strangers) in addition to family & friends who are traumatized when someone commits suicide..

Recently, several passengers aboard a HAL ship were upset with the Captain when he turned the ship around...He had to go into a port when two crew members, had an serious accident..These passengers were annoyed because the ship got into their next port late..:mad:

Their lack of compassion was appalling to me! I equate your statements in the same category, and sense a lack of compassion for someone with a Mental or Physical Illness...

Betty

 

[mamaofami]

Goldryder, thank you for your very complete description of the emotional state someone finds themselves in to end their life. Clearly, when you reach that point, you aren't thinking clearly and involving strangers or not involving them isn't what is on your mind. Your post was very informative and sensitive. Thank you.

[Prada Cowboy]

Some peopel are thinking clearly! I have a friend who tries to kill herself a minimum of 3-6 times a year! It is just to get attention I hope she will be successful one day! It sounds harsch, but they are all selfish people!

I have seen a lot by being in the hospitality industry...my thing is..if you kill yourself do it right and don't leave a mess behind!

 

I have no patience for people like that and analyzing why those poor creatures did it! Harsh again, but sorry! If you do not value live which has been give to you...time to move on!

 

I just would have never jumped off a ship...especially in Alaska! Damn this is a horrible and very painful death!

[mrsltg]

Quote Originally Posted by JerseyJaguar

I agree, if you are that desperate to kill yourself, don't involve complete strangers. This is a very selfish thing to do, with no regard for the other people on the ship or the rescue people.Unquote

 

 

I can't believe you both really mean this! :( Obviously you have never had a family member or a friend who's had either a debilitating Mental or Physical Illness..

As Goldryder & others have so aptly put it, I've never heard of a suicide which does not involve strangers..Have you ever thought about the 911 operators, Policemen, Firemen,Ambulance & Hospital personnell, (all strangers) in addition to family & friends who are traumatized when someone commits suicide..

Recently, several passengers aboard a HAL ship were upset with the Captain when he turned the ship around...He had to go into a port when two crew members, had an serious accident..These passengers were annoyed because the ship got into their next port late..:mad:

Their lack of compassion was appalling to me! I equate your statements in the same category, and sense a lack of compassion for someone with a Mental or Physical Illness...

Betty

 

 

That's okay. I equate your post with an utter lack of concern and compassion for first responders and their families, of which my husband is one. He steps into dangerous situations on a fairly regular basis. He does so without concern for himself. All he, and his colleagues, ask is that you don't jeopardize them unnecessarily. And, of course, no person with an opinion other than yours has ever suffered. My world has actually just been topped with whipped cream and happiness. Amazing, but true.

[USNUZULOOSE]

Some peopel are thinking clearly! I have a friend who tries to kill herself a minimum of 3-6 times a year! It is just to get attention I hope she will be successful one day! It sounds harsch, but they are all selfish people!

I have seen a lot by being in the hospitality industry...my thing is..if you kill yourself do it right and don't leave a mess behind!

 

I have no patience for people like that and analyzing why those poor creatures did it! Harsh again, but sorry! If you do not value live which has been give to you...time to move on!

 

I just would have never jumped off a ship...especially in Alaska! Damn this is a horrible and very painful death!

 

 

 

 

I would say that you are not a friend. Talk about selfish!!

[Sunshine91]

Frankly, I'm rather appalled at the lack of sensitivity & compassion amongst some of these posts. :confused: Its rather sad, actually, but I'm guessing that some of these anonymous posters would be the same folks complaining to the captain or corporate about the delay or missed port when the ship lost a passenger & participated in a search & rescue. Have a heart, folks. And whatever was tormenting this poor soul, its none of our business.

 

Would it make any difference if someone so desperate to end it all had left a note, detailing what she had done, with explicit instructions NOT to mount a rescue effort? I doubt it - and it shouldn't.

 

And in the case of a pax overboard, if the seas are too rough or weather is too bad, the Coasties will suspend SAR until it is safe to continue. Even they have limits. :D

 

Oh, and Prada Cowboy - that woman you know, she need help. Desperately. You're no friend to her, but perhaps you can climb down off your high horse & try to get her to see a mental health professional. jmho :o

[bepsf]

The 'why' doesn't matter, the 'how' doesn't matter....what matter's is that this lady is now at peace with herself, which is probably something she has not been able to be for some time.

 

Debating whether or not she was selfish shouldn't even be a consideration here, this lady has died a traumatic and deeply sad death...she died alone and in an escape from demons that only she could understand. Let her rest in peace and show her the respect that any human being who has passed away should have without judgement.

 

Well said -

It's just shameful how some people feel the need to judge one who was in such awful pain.

 

Life is messy - It's pure folly for anyone to think that death is any less so.

[wander]

Goldryder,

Excellent posts.

 

Some people who do things like jump off bridges or cruise ships are so depressed about themselves and life that they do not think people will even miss them or care. They think they can just disappear and no one will care, or perhaps be grateful. They do not fathom anyone thinking of trying to rescue them.

 

I would suspect that anyone who jumps off a ship in Alaskan waters in the early hours of a day is very serious about what they are doing. Unless someone sees them leave the ship and starts rescue attempts immediately, there is no chance of survival by the time they are missed. The waters are just too cold.

[peaches from georgia]

I just find it a little odd that she would have ordered room service and then shortly afterwards committed suicide. Of course there is no getting into her mind now as to what was going on. Very tragic situation for all concerned.

[suse]

It is odd but it happens. I know this guy, great guy, whom I saw laughing at 4 P.M. who then went an ordered fish and chips, brought them home for supper and before he ate, put a gun to his head.

It's awful.

[Goldryder]

I just find it a little odd that she would have ordered room service and then shortly afterwards committed suicide. Of course there is no getting into her mind now as to what was going on. Very tragic situation for all concerned.

 

Swimming on a full stomach is not a good idea and if she took medication, she might have used the food to assist in that.

 

Really makes no difference, people can debate the why's and the wherefore's til the cows come home, it won't bring Ms Malkuch back, nor will it make her loss any easier on her family and friends.

 

I just hope that she has found the peace she was looking for and is now at rest and can be remembered for how she was and treated with respect and dignity in death, for the sake of her loved ones if no-one else.

 

Many a tortured soul has gone before her and many will follow her...there by the grace of God go any one of us.

[sail7seas]

I'm happy for the family and friends that her body was found and they can have a proper burial for her.

Let the lady rest in peace.

 

[MadManOfBethesda]

Some peopel are thinking clearly! I have a friend who tries to kill herself a minimum of 3-6 times a year! It is just to get attention I hope she will be successful one day! It sounds harsch, but they are all selfish people!

 

I have seen a lot by being in the hospitality industry...my thing is..if you kill yourself do it right and don't leave a mess behind!

 

I have no patience for people like that and analyzing why those poor creatures did it! Harsh again, but sorry! If you do not value live which has been give to you...time to move on!

 

Harsh? No, I can think of quite a few adjectives to use that would better describe you. In fact, several nouns come to mind as well.

 

Unfortunately, actually typing them out would probably get me banned.

[world~citizen]

I'm happy for the family and friends that her body was found and they can have a proper burial for her.

Let the lady rest in peace.

 

 

That sentiment, I am sure, is unanimous.

 

Smooth sailing...

[Host Walt]

Just a reminder:

 

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[usha]

The law enforcement officials who are investigating the woman's death have said that they're not ready to call it a suicide.

Wow, guess they don't read Cruise Critic, huh?:rolleyes:

[world~citizen]

The law enforcement officials who are investigating the woman's death have said that they're not ready to call it a suicide.

Wow, guess they don't read Cruise Critic, huh?:rolleyes:

 

Nobody is perfect.;)

[durangoscots]

... well, I think the feeling that it was suicide was based on the statement issued by HAL. Law enforcement does need to be a lot more thorough. Has anyone heard anything different?

[serendipity1499]

That's okay. I equate your post with an utter lack of concern and compassion for first responders and their families, of which my husband is one. He steps into dangerous situations on a fairly regular basis. He does so without concern for himself. All he, and his colleagues, ask is that you don't jeopardize them unnecessarily. And, of course, no person with an opinion other than yours has ever suffered. My world has actually just been topped with whipped cream and happiness. Amazing, but true.

 

You are not the only one who has or did have a first responder in the family..

 

My DH was a first responder,(a volunteer fireman) in a very large suburban community up north..My nephew is still a first responder (a fireman), who was also in the U.S. Coast Guard, stationed in Kodiak, Alaska...My two nieces are Nurses in very large Hospitals..

 

In addition DH's family lives in a Queens, a suburb of NYC, with many close friends who were first responders on 9/11.. Several of their Friends lost their Husbands, Brothers, Sons & Daughters then..

 

Don't you think I, as well as my Sister in-Law say a prayer every time these men go out on a call..

 

One of our own Cruise Critic posters (Copper) & several others on CC, are also first responders.....Don't you think their loved ones say a prayer every day & thank God when they get home safely..

Of course, I have compassion & concern for first responders & their families..I have utmost respect for them as they took the job knowing they are putting their lives on the line every day for you & me..

 

What I fail to understand is your utter lack of concern and compassion towards those with a debilitating Mental Illness!

Do you honestly believe, they can think clearly about where & when they will reach their breaking point or if others will be putting their lives on the line to find them..They are hurting & only can think of their pain..

If you honestly believe this, then you are either very naive, have never been involved with a Mental Case, or visited a Mental Hospital...I've seen a family member break down, have visited them in a Hospital & have tried to understand their pain..I also try to adhere to an old saying

"There by the grace of god, go I"

I'd hate to think that you honestly don't care about or have compassion for these people & their families..As Sunshine said it's rather sad but it's also scary.

 

Betty

[GeckoGirl]

They mentioned in the article that her cabin mate reported her missing at 9:00 am and that she was last seen ordering room service at midnight so my question is.....Was the cabin mate in the room the whole time, granted she may have been sleeping and never heard any noise, like thislady leaving the cabin or eating her room service meal. But I was just curious as to the whereabouts of the cabin mate as they didn't really say much about it.

[bepsf]

Was the cabin mate in the room the whole time, granted she may have been sleeping and never heard any noise, like thislady leaving the cabin or eating her room service meal. But I was just curious as to the whereabouts of the cabin mate as they didn't really say much about it.

 

Many a time I've retired to the stateroom @ Midnight knowing that Scotty is still galavanting around the ship - I might sleep through his arrival (if he were quieter! ;) ) and never realize he hadn't come in until the knock at the door for breakfast delivery.