maureencruiser

2 hours ago, Yorkvillain said:

This is such a spot on description of Maureen and her hilarious humor. 
 

It's not me, it's being Boston Irish Catholic.  We know we don't deserve any happiness and if anything good does happen, we will be severely punished for it.  

4 minutes ago, Merion_Mom said:

 

Maureen is a living legend!

 

 

 

Mine, too.  I live by those words these days.

 

 

I love this so much!

 

 

My head is spinning.

 

 

You can order everything on the menu at Wonderland.  We did.  

 

 

One time, I took a mattress topper still in its shipping box.  I used that box for B2B2B as my table!

Maybe we really are related...  🤔  My one dessert comment was about Sabor, not Wonderland.  Wonderland was the puff of smoke.  Try to keep up. 

Looking back, I see I posted the same photo of my drink twice and tried to pass one off as being at the pub instead of the Schooner.  I told you they forgot the grapefruit! 🤪

31 minutes ago, wolfcathorse said:

who's your captain? We had Johnny on the Trans-Atlantic.

Patrick.  Boo!  Sorry, Patrick.

Chilling on the Boardwalk, waiting for lunch at Johnny Rocket’s.

That’s a hard nope.

Pommes Frites for the Canadians, French Fries for the hoi polloi.

Burgers.

Back at the Schooner.

I requested a Tangueray and grapefruit.  I think they forgot the grapefruit.

A bunch of people came by with leis, it was our roll call on a pub tour.

Your girl got lei’d.

Ryma and I were exhausted by our exertions and decided we needed a cold beverage.

Since I had to get going this morning, I didn’t have time to prepare my Thanksgiving ducks.  I took them with me to the pub.  I’m sorry that I can’t remember the name, I know it’s two things.  The Cat and Mouse?  The Horse and Hound?  The Boot and Bonnet?  The Captain and Teneille?  

Two people came up to me while I was preparing them and ducks were quickly dispatched to them.  

Just like yesterday, they were disappearing as soon as I put them up.  Ryma is my assistant ducker.  Watch the spell check on that one.  She’s loving it.

These four must be from the USDA, they inspected the duck for a while before taking it.

This man moved one then took a photo.  He left it in a position where it was harder to see so I sent Ryma out to correct it.

We had a few minutes to spare before lunch.  The world’s loudest band was about to start playing so we got the Heck out of there.

Demonstrating our reverse planking abilities.

Ryma, looking off in the distance: I can see Canada from here!

Looking down, contemplating her life’s choices.

*record scratch*

*freeze frame*

Yup, that’s me.  You’re probably wondering how I got into this situation.  

Bringing home the Gold for Canada.

The whole cast, looking great.

Captain Patrick.  Captain Johnny drove her across the pond then bailed when he heard I was coming onboard.  Probably afraid I’d beat him in a scooter race.

Everybody.

Tuesday morning, I was up early and I was on a mission, the Vitality Cafe for a Wake Me Up shake.  I got there and they had no idea what I meant, it wasn’t on the menu.  I told them what I remembered seeing online, espresso, chocolate protein powder, peanut butter, almond milk, maybe banana.  The woman behind me agreed that it sounded great, so she ordered one, too.  I mused how good it would be with some Mailbu in it and the waiter said, Kahlua!  

It was good!  It separated a bit by the time I got to the Aqua Theater, but I will definitely get it again.  It’s covered by both the Refreshment package and the Diamond vouchers.

Get your noses in the air, it’s time for the Top Tier party.

One day, one day…

The CD, Tom, maybe?

Ryma, no!  Get down from there!

If you can’t beat them, join them.  Ryma and I putting on a show.

Dinner time!  I told Edi, my waiter, that I liked the pumpkin rolls.  Tada!

Social distancing in the MDR.

Lasagna.

Apple Blossom with a big scoop of butter, I mean vanilla ice cream.  This was outstanding.

After dinner, I just worked on the review and had another early evening.  On each of the first two days, I only used four of my drink vouchers and haven’t touched my wine. I’m here to rest and relax, especially relax.  My dentist said I’m grinding my teeth so much I cracked two crowns.  I’m thinking drinks in the Schooner, maybe some trivia, etc is about all the excitement I can handle.  I want to see the Aqua Show and the comedy, that’s about it.  

After lunch, I finally started working on my review and, as you know, I had a lot to get off my chest.  I worked on it until time for pre dinner cocktails.

Apparently, there’s a surveillance camera in my room, watching me trip over the Evian.

If you haven’t ordered an Evian coffee table yet, I highly recommend it.

Ryma had an Espresso Martini and I had a Greyhound (vodka and grapefruit).  I asked if I could have gin instead and Ryma said get Tangueray.  Good looking out, Ryma, it was delicious!

58 minutes ago, Auntiemomo said:

We had cans of water on the TA.  Did they stop that and go with bottled water?

I wish!  No, it's cans unless you order the water package, then it's glass bottles.  Because they're lighter and safer? 🙄    I think Ryma and I are going to pull off a water heist today.  Who can we call for bail money?

37 minutes ago, Steeler Nation At Sea said:

 

Ah, yes, but that was Rita's Cantina! Fun times!  Sabor has always been much, much better than Rita's, IMHO.  They even used to do the tableside guacamole when Harmony was brand new!  So good!  Still is,  even coming from the kitchen.  Their pico de gallo is pretty darn good, too.  Regarding the dessert sampler at lunch, I was almost disappointed at dinner when I had to pick just one! 😉

Oh, a different restaurant, I see.  I thought tableside went away because of Covid.  That's okay, I'm here for the steak, not the sizzle.  That's also why I'm not interested in Wonderland.  A puff of smoke rolls into the room and turns into a shrimp cocktail?  No thanks!  One dessert?  Blasphemy!  

I wasn’t sure what I wanted for dessert, he said, don’t worry, you get a sample of everything.

So, I sampled everything.

Here I am drinking and driving home.  You’ll notice since I met Dale, my hair has turned completely white.  Coincidence?  You be the judge.

All the people behind me are arriving for the Aqua Show.  It was cancelled last night, because of the weather.  Apparently, there’s bad weather in the Bahamas?  I haven’t turned on my TV since I arrived.  The show was actually cancelled again, Ryma said people were booing.  What, you want the divers to get injured for your entertainment?  Geesh.

I wanted to take a minute to give a shout out to the people on the Disabled forum, loads of information there, especially the woman who gave the discount code for the American Spinal Association.  I paid $201 for the scooter for two weeks.  If you cancel within seven days of sailing, you still pay the full cost, I believe.  With Covid, you don’t know if you’re sailing until two days prior.  They have insurance for that for $10.  That seemed like money well spent.  I did not get the insurance for damages or loss.  That was $150.  If you lose the scooter without insurance, they charge you $800.  If you paid the $150 and lose it, they still charge you $500, so $650 in total.  That didn’t seem like a great deal to me.  Watch this space, if I lose or damage it, I’ll be in tears again.  If you or someone in your party has trouble walking or standing, I highly recommend it.  Remember, the ship is three football fields long.  End of scooter commercial.  This message has been brought to you by the American Spinal Association.  

Y’all probably know this better than I do, is it spicy chicken stuffed jalapeno wrapped in bacon?  Whatever it was called, OMG, lip smacking.  Lip burning, too. 

I had the beef quesadilla.  Delicous!  After eating one quarter of the actual tortilla, I started pulling the beef out, I couldn’t eat all that!  What a waste of perfectly good cheese.  

Uber Eats arrived with Ryma’s burger.

We ordered another round, they brought us avocado Margaritas instead.  I drank mine anyway, Ryma donated hers to me and I drove home with it in my scooter basket.

Since I was doing the MDR for dinner, I used my BOGO for lunch at Sabor.

I love their guacamole.  I asked the manager if they were going to do the Happy Hour with the Margaritas and the snacks.  He said he would have to ask his boss.

Who remembers the party they used to have at Sabor, with the three Margaritas, dancing and dinner?  I did that on my first day on Allure, back in 2013.  Or, maybe that was just me having a good time.

Ryma the rebel doesn’t like Mexican, so, she went over to Johnny Rocket’s to see if she could get take out.  She came back with a waiter.

We both ordered cucumber jalapeno Margaritas.

Monday morning.  Oh well, if they’re not going to take the water, I’ll use it as a duck staging area.  

I slept in, rolled out of bed around 10, met Ryma for a healthy breakfast. 😮

While sitting at the pub, I was putting one duck at a time out on the jewelry counter.  They were disappearing before I could hobble back to the table.

This woman took a few pictures first, looking around to make sure she wasn’t going to be arrested, before she left with a duck.

6 hours ago, John&LaLa said:

 

Unfortunately, internet on Harmony was abysmal last week. 

 

Carry on

Oh, yes, I know.  I saw you were without internet for like two days.  Fingers crossed.

4 hours ago, Merion_Mom said:

 

For a minute there, I thought that not only did they NOT pick up your two cases of water, they brought another two!  🤪

Exactly how I planned it!  Mom, did you see I ate the dreaded broccoli?  You can stand in for my Mom. 

🤪 One of the things left behind at home was my Q-tips, I didn't think of them while I was ordering from Walgreens.  Just as well, Mom always told me to not put anything in my ear smaller than my shoulder.  Another pearl of wisdom from my Mom : Never miss an opportunity to go to the bathroom.  

2 hours ago, FionaMG said:

You're a very funny, upbeat lady @maureencruiser. Somehow you manage to make a string of disasters sound like material for a stand-up comedy act. Good for you! 

 

 

Oh, I'm sure it's hilarious to you, sitting at home on the couch,  🤪  It's my freaking life, going down the toilet.  Oh well, they say all comedy is tragedy. 

11 hours ago, not-enough-cruising said:

Agreed. 

I always use AMEX for all my cruise purchases. is a red herring in my book. 

Are you aware of the current Amex promotion with royal?

11 hours ago, Cigar King said:

You know what I'm ashamed of?

That hat?

5 hours ago, Cigar King said:

That's what I get for not reading the entire thread before posting a reply.  

 

And, there's the real shame.

43 minutes ago, Yorkvillain said:

I think there is photographic proof in a previous live thread of you pulling a dongle too hard. 

Funny, you didn't complain then.  There's really never a bad time to share those pictures. 🤪 Villain, when do you cruise next?  I can't get Dale or Andrew to go, I guess I'll have to settle for you.  

My memory is really bad, so, forgive me if I'm repeating myself.  I had requested a room at the hotel near the elevator, I didn't want to take a handicapped room away from someone in a wheelchair.  They gave me one 19 doors away. 🤬

I just got Dale tucked in for the night.  

Meanwhile, I was  scootering around as if I was born to do so.  By that I mean sending small children scattering and causing adults to cower in fear. I made my way to the pub and Sorrento’s for pizza and a drink.  Yes, I know that’s salty.  I’m not a monk.  I had the Boston Iced Tea Party.  It was on the card and I really didn’t want to bother with scanning a QR code right now.

I met up with Ryma and we moved to the Schooner Bar, another venue with easy access from my cabin.  

I had a Lavender Daiquiri.

Ryma likes specialty dining and I’m doing the MDR.  She wants to eat in the MDR on Thanksgiving, though, even though she celebrated hers in October.

I’m in MTD, Deck 3, with a 7:15 reservation each night.  I requested the first table when you walk in the door and I got it.  It’s perfect.  I see everybody coming and going.  

The pumpkin bread, my favorite.

Moooo!  Prime Rib with the dreaded 2 pieces of broccoli from the Why no vegetables thread.  Also, that thread let me know it was alright to request a baked potato.  I did eat the broccoli, Mom would be proud. 

Some kind of hazelnut shenanigans, I couldn’t even finish my meal.  The only thing I ate all of, was the broccoli!

Back in my room for an early night.  I was asleep by 10pm, I put a tea light on the water so I could see it. 

I woke up at 4am, worrying about my computer and thinking I could buy a new one in St Thomas, if they’re open on Thanksgiving.  There’s a Kmart and an Office Max.  I just need a lightweight laptop for cruising.  They seemed to have ones for around $200, that should fit the bill.  I literally cannot stop spending money on his cruise.  I woke up again at 8am and Googled Acer Chromebook won’t start and was able to do a hard reset and it worked!  

That gets me through Sunday, I’ll do Monday and Tuesday tomorrow, so I can catch up, the beauty of sea days.  Internet is terribly slow, keeps cutting out, of course, but, I’ll do the best I can.  Things are definitely looking up! 

I forgot to mention, Ryma is across the hall.  I’m in 6677, she’s in 6678.  Next week I’m in 6672, she’s in 6676.  I upgrade to a balcony next week.  I asked the steward today if my next room has the bed by the balcony and he said it did.  That will help with scootering. It’s hard enough getting the scooter in and out on my own.  I can’t imagine having to lift the scooter over the bed.   My steward did tell me I could call them and they’d take my scooter overnight to charge it and return it in the morning.  He said to call them 15 minutes before I needed it.  I’m going to assume that means give them an hour.  I kept checking with Royal to see if any handicapped rooms were available.  There were none.  Meanwhile, a woman on our roll call booked a guarantee balcony and was assigned a handicapped room.  She called them and they said it was fine.  She put in for a Royal Up and was assigned another handicapped room.  C’mon, Royal, you can do better than this.  

I had an inside cabin near the Boardwalk.  I figured that way I could get food, drinks, and entertainment even if I had trouble with the scooter.

A peek inside the room.

I had originally ordered 2 water packages, once I knew I was getting 5 drink vouchers per day.  I later cancelled and ordered the Refreshment package.  The water arrived anyway.  I sleep on the left side of the bed.  You can see they placed the water in prime middle of the night, toe stubbing territory.

I can see myself getting up, stubbing my right foot then falling into the scooter and stubbing my left foot.

My luggage arrived quickly.  I put all four bottles of wine in one small bag, expecting it to be sent to the naughty room, but, it wasn’t.   

I've told my steward twice about the water, it's still here.  Ryma thinks they're not going to pick it up.  We both hate the cans, these are glass bottles.  I'm thinking if they don't pick it up by the end of the week, I just might shuttle it across the hall to my other cabin.  

Trust me when I tell you, I  was up early for the hotel breakfast and had to wait for Walgreens to open and fill my order.  I had plugged in the laptop overnight and had a few hours to kill before my Cortrans shuttle so I figured I’d start my review.  The  laptop  was still black.  More tears, I texted Ryma and told her I was thinking of just cancelling the whole thing.  She talked me down off the ledge and finally I was off to the port.

That giant, purple suitcase is the one they couldn’t find, sitting 10 feet in front of their desk with 2 black suitcases.  It is pretty discrete.  Notice the turkey peeking out of my carry on.  My friend lent me her turkey hat after I made three promises.  I would wear it for embarkation, I would wear it on Thanksgiving and I would try to get a picture wearing it with the Captain.

Promises made, promises kept.

 I called the front desk, just to make sure it wasn’t already delivered.  I was especially concerned because they were supposed to notify me once they found it.  If they had it, but just couldn’t deliver it yet, that’s one thing.  Not having it was another.  I started having visions of some random person watching it spinning on the carousel and just taking it.  I decided to see what I had in my carry on.  

Hmmmm, it’s not looking good for a two week cruise with just six bags of candy, 96 Cruising Ducks, 84 Cruising Ducks bracelets and one Hello Kitty.  I enjoy doing the Ducks and wasn’t planning on doing the 26 Acts of Kindness again, but, when I started packing, I found 26 small gift bags.  I figured since I had my big suitcase, I would do the Acts one last time.   I had to scramble for something to put in them.  I had a dozen decks of playing cards laying around.  I bought some candy, just missing the after Halloween sales , and a few Christmas/Winter decorations.I couldn’t print the cards explaining the Acts, so, I figured I’d use the ducks to let people know they could take the bags.  

9:30, I’m practically in tears and I decide to take the hotel shuttle back to the airport, hoping I didn’t cross paths with the guy delivering it, missing him.

I told the shuttle driver, I wanted to go to B40, which is where the baggage office was.  He said I should go to the lost and found, which was somewhere else.  I still had visions of my luggage on the carousel and that’s where I wanted to go.  Mind you, I’m walking with a cane, I left my walker at home because I couldn’t imagine wrestling all that up the gangway on my scooter.  

I went to the baggage office and there is my suitcase, just sitting there with two other suitcases.  I was livid and Boston came out.  I ranted and raved as I was getting my suitcase, tossing out a few choice words on the way out.  I called the hotel to come pick me up, it had been about a minute since he dropped me off.  

They told me to meet him at A4.  A whole other terminal, with a cane and a 45 pound suitcase with two broken wheels, courtesy of AA.  Again, tears welled up in my eyes.  I got outside and took a taxi, $16 I really didn’t need to be spending right now.  I got back to the hotel and  opened the suitcase to discover I had left my hanging toiletry bag at home.  In tears, I ordered curbside from Walgreens and planned to Uber in the morning.  Again, money spent that I don’t have. I tried to order food from Grubhub or UberEats, but couldn't get the apps to work.  I called the front desk, asking which restaurants just deliver on their own.   They said Bronx Pizza and Outback.  I called Bronx Pizza, they were closed, Outback said they don’t deliver.   More tears.  I just went to bed, determined to put this behind me and enjoy the cruise.  I was starving.