Anyone have this happen to them?

[Bruin Steve]

Even tho I am a Roman Catholic I would of said NONE!

 

I am guessing that saying "NONE!" would NOT have helped...Overzealous religious proseletyzers don't really care what particular religion you are...and they seem to find it a special challenge to go after atheists, agnostics, Jews and others they deem to be "nonbelievers"...The tablemates in this case obviously lack the proper etiquette or manners to be decent tablemates...

 

I have encountered these sorts over the years...coming door-to-door to my house, loitering around shopping malls, even in the workplace...

 

...luckily, for whatever reason, I have seldom encountered them on a cruise...I also do not discuss religion on a cruise...or try not to...

 

We were on a cruise last summer that visited Israel...so, despite the general rule of not discussing religion, it inevitably comes up in discussion of which tours one has taken or is taking when visiting an area so rich in religious sites...At dinner one night (Oceania, so, thank God--or whoever--the dining room was open seating), the subject came up regarding what we were doing for our Haifa stop...We had planned a marvelous private tour that included a visit to Megiddo. For those who don't know...and several at our table didn't...so I explained it, Megiddo is an archaeological site that was the basis of John Michener's epic novel "The Source"...Something like 29 different layers...different civilazations...were uncovered in the dig, one on top of the other...It was located at the crossroads of the major highways of the ancient days and, therefore, the site of many battles over the centuries, with each conqueror rebuilding a town or fortress atop the ruins of the prior one...because of this history, I explained, it is this location that, in many cultures and mythologies, is deemed the site of the "final battle"...the word "Har" in Hebrew means mountain...and the Hill at Megiddo--"Har Megiddo" has been corrupted in our translations to "Armageddon"...

 

...at which point a woman at my table broke into a screaming, angry rant about "That is NOT mythology! It is the ABSOLUTE TRUTH because it is the word of God written in the Bible". She spent the rest of the dinner spewing out fundamentalist Christian rhetoric peppered with bits of ugly Anti-Semitism and talk of needing to be saved and our eventual end in eternal damnation... ...I think even her husband was embarassed and kept quiet...We were guessing he's felt her wrath before...

 

We just avoided her the rest of the cruise...and she became sort of a running joke among those of us who shared that table of 8 that night...

 

Personally, I believe that whatever religion one is, if it works for them, if it helps make them a better person or fulfils their psychological needs, well, good for them....BUT DON'T try to push your beliefs on others...not on a cruise ship, not anywhere...

 

It is RUDE to assume that your religious beliefs are somehow superior to anyone else's...religious beliefs are a personal thing...

[sasset]

Even tho I am a Roman Catholic I would of said NONE! There are 2 things I keep out of conversations with people on vacation one is religion the other is politics this is not the time.

When traveling with our friends I always request a table for 4 only, as we all see one another once a year we have a lot to catch up on & do not want to be rude to other passengers. Normally when traveling just with DH I request table for 2. We learned the hard way when we were seated with a family of 4 that spoke impeccable english after we introduced ourselves continuned to speak spanish amongst themselves for the entire 7 days. Oh by the way they were missionaries & made us feel very uncomfortable. At the time I did not know any better about requesting a table change, I've come along way since then.

 

As Bruin Steve said, "None" most likely would not have ended it...probably more of a challenge as you may have neen perceived as "Godless". Faced with that situation I would have changed tables at the mere question.

[dmk]

When we tried to join our table, we were refused. One of the women told the maitre D that we were not part of their group. We are fun people and don't mind joining any group.

However, we said forget it and took a table for two.

It was an unpleasant experience.

[Lois R]

When we tried to join our table, we were refused. One of the women told the maitre D that we were not part of their group. We are fun people and don't mind joining any group.

 

However, we said forget it and took a table for two.

 

It was an unpleasant experience.

 

dmk, you probably know I sail solo...if we ever cruise together I would

love to have ya'll as my tablemates:D:):D...we can discuss our favorite

thread together:)

[Lois R]

Quote by Bruin Steve:

"Personally, I believe that whatever religion one is, if it works for them, if it helps make them a better person or fulfils their psychological needs, well, good for them....BUT DON'T try to push your beliefs on others...not on a cruise ship, not anywhere..."

 

 

Hi Steve,:) Thanks for the eliquent post. You are spot on about this

subject.

[dmk]

dmk, you probably know I sail solo...if we ever cruise together I would

love to have ya'll as my tablemates:D:):D...we can discuss our favorite

thread together:)

 

Hi Lois:)

Eventhough we've never met, I know we'd enjoy ourselves on the same cruise. It's about one's outlook on life and I think we are of like mind:)

What is your next cruise?

[Lois R]

Hi Lois:)

 

Eventhough we've never met, I know we'd enjoy ourselves on the same cruise. It's about one's outlook on life and I think we are of like mind:)

 

What is your next cruise?

 

Hi dmk,:) I don't know:eek: sometime before the end of the year but

I don't have anything booked yet:eek:

[BroncosFan2010]

Some folks, probably just like to keep to themselves. That is the way we are, consequently, we generally have breakfast and lunch in our cabin. If we eat in the Lido we go on off times when it is not crowded. We really like the peace in quiet which is not possible in the Lido during busier times. We do get a table for 2 in the MDR as well. We find making small talk with folks we don't know tiring. We do socialize with folks for short times but not during meals.

 

I know how you feel! DH is not very social, and it take a lot out of him to make small talk. We prefer to dine alone. I am very social, but am a psychologist, so it is part of my job to be social. I often get odd reactions when I tell people what I do for a living. Some want to share their life story/problems, but that is NOT what I want to do on my vacation. Others completely shy away from me, probably for fear that I will psycho-analyze them all dinner.... LOL So, a table for two and dining alone is perfect for us.

[FTLcruisers]

On our last cruise, we changed from early to late seating. We wound up being assigned to a table of 8 -- however, the other 6 people were traveling together.. No one spoke to us at first and we thought it was going to be a disaster. But, after a few minutes, I asked the man next to me whether it was a family traveling together - he explained that actually there were 4 tables of people traveling together. From there, he explained who was who at the table and eventually everyone was in conversation. It was only a 3 night cruise but the last night we got hugs and handshakes from all! I am glad I did not just sit there but instead initiated a conversation.

[FinelyCruising]

We were on the Solstice 5/16. Went to dinner the 1st night. We were at a table for 10. When we got to the table 2 couples were already seated and talking, we did not want to interupt their conversation, they were discussing where each couple was from etc. After 10-15 Minutes neither couple even acknowledged we had sat down right next to them so we asked for a new table and got a table for 2. This was our 29th cruise and never had anyone totally ingnore us when first sitting down at a table.

Keith

 

No. We do not enjoy tables of ten and we would not select them unless under special circumstances. You were two of the four that were there. Maybe you could have waited for the others to be seated, but I don't fault you for getting a table for just the two of you.

 

Like others who do enjoy the mixing, after so many cruises I'd think you'd have had the panache to fit in no matter what when selecting a large table for dining.;)

[FinelyCruising]

I know how you feel! DH is not very social, and it take a lot out of him to make small talk. We prefer to dine alone. I am very social, but am a psychologist, so it is part of my job to be social. I often get odd reactions when I tell people what I do for a living. Some want to share their life story/problems, but that is NOT what I want to do on my vacation. Others completely shy away from me, probably for fear that I will psycho-analyze them all dinner.... LOL So, a table for two and dining alone is perfect for us.

 

Maybe you 'sell' your profession differently, like being a heath-care advocate who recommends benefits of certain treatment programs to those who contact you for outside advise. :)

[Cruisenewbie85]

That's unfortunate, yet some people are just that way. I spent time in Minnesota and found them to be extremely bizzare and strange. I remember there were countless times where I would smile at someone, introduce myself and extend my hand for a shake....they would smile back, shake my hand, say "nice to meet you", but would never say their name! I would literally have to say, "and your name is?" Just very bizzare. They had something there called "Minnesota Nice", which was laughable.:confused:

[FinelyCruising]

oh boy....

[BroncosFan2010]

Maybe you 'sell' your profession differently, like being a heath-care advocate who recommends benefits of certain treatment programs to those who contact you for outside advise. :)

 

It doesn't matter if I "sell" my profession. When asked what I do, I tell people I am a therapist/psychologist, and I almost always get one of the two responses. I try not to go into detail (not that I can anyway, with confidentiality), but I love what I do and will answer what questions I can. However, it is certainly not enjoyable to sit at a table with people who expect/want a therapy session every night (believe me, it happens)!! I am on vacation for a reason!

[Bruin Steve]

It doesn't matter if I "sell" my profession. When asked what I do, I tell people I am a therapist/psychologist, and I almost always get one of the two responses. I try not to go into detail (not that I can anyway, with confidentiality), but I love what I do and will answer what questions I can. However, it is certainly not enjoyable to sit at a table with people who expect/want a therapy session every night (believe me, it happens)!! I am on vacation for a reason!

 

Hmmmmm...I am an attorney...you can imagine the two responses I get...

My wife is a psychologist...

 

But it reminds me of an old joke:

 

A Doctor and a Lawyer meet at a cocktail party...

 

The Doctor says: "Hey, I'm sure you face this same problem. People see me at these social occasions and hear I'm a doctor and they always start telling me this thing hurts or that and they start asking me for my opinion...for free medical advice...I'm really getting sick of it...You're an attorney, you probably get a lot of the same...What do you do?"

 

The Attorney replies: "Well...It's quite simple...when I get back to my office on Monday, I merely send them a bill for legal services...and I usually never get bothered by them again..."

 

The Doctor thinks, "Hmmmm...Great idea ...Thanks"...

 

Monday, the Doctor goes back to his office...and there's a bill waiting for him from the lawyer...

[Atwell]

Our learning after many cruises is not to hesitate to change tables if you are not enjoying your table-mates. We always request to be seated at a large table as we enjoy meeting new people and sitting at a smaller table can become dull after a while if you are on a longer cruise. Occasionally, we run into strange situations and are glad to learn in this thread that we are not the only ones who experience these awkward situations.

We were on the Millennium several years ago and were seated at an oval table for 10. The first evening when we arrived at the table there was one other couple, young honeymooners. We started a pleasant conversation with them, and meanwhile, another couple arrived and sat at the other end of the table as far away as possible. Despite our best efforts they would not introduce themselves or engage in conversation except with each other. Halfway through dinner, a single woman joined the table, also at the far end. She would not engage in conversation, either, with us or the other couple seated next to her. Therefore, our situation was for a table of 10 we had 3 empty seats, three people who would not talk to the others, and two couples who were having a nice conversation. However, my spouse asked me later what could we possibly talk about with the newlyweds after the first one or two nights? I agreed, so we changed tables the next evening and enjoyed the rest of our cruise. We tried to find the young honeymooners to let them know we were changing but they must have come to the same conclusion as they were never seen again at that table.

Lesson - you never know what you might get in table-mates and there is nothing that requires you to be miserable for the entire cruise - so don't hesitate to change. One of the Ass't Maitre D's is available for table changes for at least the first three days just outside the dining room.

[FinelyCruising]

[quote name='BroncosFan2010']It doesn't matter if I "sell" my profession. When asked what I do, I tell people I am a therapist/psychologist, and I almost always get one of the two responses. I try not to go into detail (not that I can anyway, with confidentiality), but I love what I do and will answer what questions I can. However, it is certainly not enjoyable to sit at a table with people who expect/want a therapy session every night (believe me, it happens)!! I am on vacation for a reason![/QUOTE]

I don't doubt it happens. I picked that up from your first post. If it were me and I wanted to have peace and quiet and I knew the disclosure was going to be provocative based on historical information, I'd have softened the details to be less inviting to those who want to become your new friend now that you are a captive audience. ;)

[celle]

[quote name='dmk'][FONT=Arial Black][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]When we tried to join our table, we were refused. One of the women told the maitre D that we were not part of their group. We are fun people and don't mind joining any group.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial Black][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000080]However, we said forget it and took a table for two.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial Black][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000080]It was an unpleasant experience.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/quote]

We were at a table for 6, had another couple join us for the first night.

The second night, the other couple did not turn up, but a party of four was shown to our table. They looked at us and one woman said "We don't want to sit with you! We requested a table for four." I felt like crawling back under my stone! :mad:

For the rest of the (14-day) cruise, we sometimes had our original companions, and other nights we sat alone. We enjoyed the nights we had company and felt uncomfortable on the other nights.

[BroncosFan2010]

[quote name='Bruin Steve']Hmmmmm...I am an attorney...you can imagine the two responses I get...
My wife is a psychologist...

But it reminds me of an old joke:

A Doctor and a Lawyer meet at a cocktail party...

The Doctor says: "Hey, I'm sure you face this same problem. People see me at these social occasions and hear I'm a doctor and they always start telling me this thing hurts or that and they start asking me for my opinion...for free medical advice...I'm really getting sick of it...You're an attorney, you probably get a lot of the same...What do you do?"

The Attorney replies: "Well...It's quite simple...when I get back to my office on Monday, I merely send them a bill for legal services...and I usually never get bothered by them again..."

The Doctor thinks, "Hmmmm...Great idea ...Thanks"...

Monday, the Doctor goes back to his office...and there's a bill waiting for him from the lawyer...[/quote]

LOL, that was great.

[Cruiseorr]

We had the same experience as the OP on our last cruise with the Star Princess. It was also our first time being ignored by other table mates after being seated in the MDR.
In our case, we were the last to be seated at a table for ten. After we sat down, we wished everyone a good evening, as we usually do. This was met with silence and averted eyes. The person immediately to my right actually turned his back to me. There were a couple of people across the table talking amongst themselves, in English, so we knew it was not a language thing. It was a rude people thing, which seems to be a growing trend in society these days.
We sat there for a couple of minutes and could see that things were not going to go well. We tried a second overture and again, we were rebuffed. For whatever reason, they did not want us there, which was fine with me! Life, and cruising, is too short for this nonsense.
We stood up, wished everyone a pleasant evening, and asked to be reseated.
We enjoyed very nice company the remainder of the cruise since, after this little "event", the Maitre'D always went out of his way to make sure that we were seated with "fun people" as he termed it.
I agree with Atwell and other posters, that you do occasionally encounter these awkward situations, and we've all had a few, and I also agree that asking for a table for two, or asking to be reseated, is better than enduring an evening with unpleasant people.
And, for those travelling with a large group, if your group wishes to have the table to themselves, which is completely understandable, a suggestion might be to make this sentiment known to the dining room staff so they won't bring people over to be seated where they are not wanted. It would avoid any unpleasantness, which nobody likes to encounter on their holiday.

[Can'tstopcruising]

[quote name='Bruin Steve']Hmmmmm...I am an attorney...you can imagine the two responses I get...
My wife is a psychologist...

But it reminds me of an old joke:

A Doctor and a Lawyer meet at a cocktail party...

The Doctor says: "Hey, I'm sure you face this same problem. People see me at these social occasions and hear I'm a doctor and they always start telling me this thing hurts or that and they start asking me for my opinion...for free medical advice...I'm really getting sick of it...You're an attorney, you probably get a lot of the same...What do you do?"

The Attorney replies: "Well...It's quite simple...when I get back to my office on Monday, I merely send them a bill for legal services...and I usually never get bothered by them again..."

The Doctor thinks, "Hmmmm...Great idea ...Thanks"...

Monday, the Doctor goes back to his office...and there's a bill waiting for him from the lawyer...[/quote]

You gotta luv it!

[Can'tstopcruising]

Reading these stories, I can't believe how rude some pax are. To totally ignore a tablemate, or to say that you can't sit there is very childish IMO.

We have had tables for 2, large tables, open seating, closed seating (!) and we have always made the best of the evening. If the tablemates were really not "our cup of tea", it just gave us something to talk and laugh about afterwards.

On our next cruise, we plan to be a group and do open seating. But, I am sure the others will agree with me that we will take whatever size table is available. And knowing my group, whoever joins us will probably get lots of attention.

Most often, tablemates at random have little in common. But even the differences can make interesting conversation.

[ironin]

On our recent 13-day cruise, most people assumed we were an inter-racial :eek: gay :eek: couple :eek:, one of whom speaks English as a second language :eek:. (We aren't. A couple, that is ;), although we've been friends for 25 years). In theory, we arrived at a dinner table loaded with enough baggage to fill a C5A, particularly as we were doing Select dining, usually at a 4-top, and thus sitting with a different couple every night. In reality, we did not expect any problems and had absolutely none. We thoroughly enjoyed meeting everyone we dined with, all of whom went out of their way to exchange pleasantries and experiences over the course of the cruise.

[skt4cruise]

[quote name='sandancer']We were once sat at a table of 8 and the only people there were a couple with their 15 year old daughter. Not only did they not want to make conversation but the mother suggested that it would be a good idea if we asked to move to another table. We did not need asking twice. It was a 14 night cruise and the thought of spending every evening in a frosty atmosphere just did not appeal. We moved and had great tablemates who we are still in touch and the very best waiter in all of our cruises. Since then we have chosen Select or Anytime dining whenever possible.[/quote]

wow horrid experience and this (must have been same 3some) happened to us on Carnival, we asked to be moved and had a great cruise, whereas the first table remained by themselves looking miserable.

[happy cruzer]

Yep, it happens. We sat down in a situation just like OP described. The two other couples were enjoying meeting each other and no intention of meeting us. So I knew we would change tables if this continued however after about 15 minutes I was finally able to break in with an observation, ice broken, we had a great table. So it can turn around. I but it down to people who have no interest in social skills or manners at all they think it is all artificial.