Toddlers and the MDR - AHHHHHHH

[poppetts]

Excurse me but the OP has mentioned serveral times that they have a large table and it would have been difficut to move tables, and why should she? The parents need to make there children behave and stop the screaming, crying and running around. Why should the op have to move? The family should have been asked to leave if they could not calm their child down.

 

I have really not seen any misbehaving children on our cruises, but if I did,I would by annoyed and I would also be complaining.

 

I have to wonder why this was originaly on the RCCL boards and moved to the family boards.

 

Great parents are appreciated.

 

Did the OP complain when it was happening or speak with the parents?

[kimmimom]

and I agree 100%. They are now 18, 12, and 9.

[Onessa]

. . . I mean, seriously, how often have all of us seen parents at a nice restaurant (heck, it can be any restaurant) after 8 PM with a small child and the poor thing is a wreck. It's way past that kid's tolerance level, but mom and dad wanted to go out and this is when they wanted to go, and kiddo needed to go with them. Why put your child in a situation when you just know they are going to fail? It's totally unfair to everyone, the child most of all.

 

. . . Some parents liked to place blame on the situation (the child is tired or they are hungry). IMHO that's the parents fault. If you know your child is tired or hungry then don't take them to a sit down restaurant where they need to wait for their food. . . .

 

So I made the mad dash to the grocery store last Saturday afternoon - I generally avoid Sat afternoons at Woodmans since I know it is going to be a zoo; but hey, it was a choice between a 2:00pm Saturday shopping trip or going hungry until Wednesday night! A woman, her husband and three kids somehow end up whatever aisle I take the two littlest ones (one 6-8M, the other around 2YO) are both screaming at the top of their lungs in the cart, and the 4YO is literally kicking stuff off of the shelves.

 

I brought the situation to one of the manager's attention (hey if the kid is destroying merchandise, that increases MY cost of shopping) and I happen to be in the same aisle with them again (argh! again!!) when he catches up with them (just in time for him to witness the 4YO clear off about 12 cereal boxes) and the mom says (god as my witness) "well it's their nap time OF COURSE they are going to be cranky!"

 

Well duh! Bless his heart the store manager says perhaps you should go home and let them nap and I can hold your cart for you until afterward. He was very diplomatic, but firm that they really needed to leave.

 

As we've all pointed out in previous points, parents need to know what their kids are capabable of handling and what they are not. Bringing kids into a sitaution that they are not capable of handling or just not capable of handling at this particular time is inexcusable. If there is a "melt down" coming or happening, it is the parent's responsibility to deal with that situation in a manner that minimizes inconvenience to other people.

[KEPE]

I agree, parents are to blame. You don't let a child act that way regardless of where they are. As I believe it was busman said, I wouldn't let my child behave that way in McDonalds.

 

On our cruise my DD will be 4 and I hope that people sitting next to us in the MDR and specialty restaurants (yes, we will be attending them, flame away) will not roll their eyes when they see us and "assume" they are in for a horrible night. We live in NYC and my DD often eats out and in very nice restaurants, she remains seated, eats her dinner and we enjoy our family conversation. We've been out on many occasions and had people tell us how well beahved she is. If she whines or gets antsy it's simple, I leave with her while DH gets our food to go and pays the check. If she is in a mood, tired or cranky before we head out, we know it won't be a good idea to go and make other arrangements. She is mine and I don't want to be disrupted while I eat my dinner I surely don't expect anyone else to deal with that.

 

All comes down to the parents and what they expect of and let their children get away with. I just hope people don't judge and just assume just from seeing a child. Just as rude as the parents who let their kids cause chaos!

[cruisingcanadian]

Personally i think the OP should have moved tables or dining room. Time to look at river cruises or the QM2, much less chance of kids there , or better still stay at home!![/quote]

How incredibly rude! And I thought Australians are such nice people- aparently not all of them:rolleyes:.

[cruisingcanadian]

MrsK,

I am the OP. Sorry to burst yoru bubble, but the thread started out on the RCCL board site. CC moved it here - not me.

 

The over riding theme is that parents need to PARENT. They need to know when their children are misbehaving and DO something about it. These parents just let their kid cry, wiggle, run inthe aisles, etc and just went blindly about their dinner. I probably could have put up with it, but when it happened on formal night as well, that was it!

 

We need to be less obcessed with ourselves and think just the teeniest bit about those around us - and the impact we might be having upon them....that's all.

 

CaroleSS, I just finished reading all the posts here,and I have to tell you that you handled all responses in such a polite and patient way that I admire you for that. I actually got pretty upset with some rude and intentionally "misunderstanding" comments,twisting your words and simply attacking you.

What is so difficult to understand about common sense,curteous manners and respect for other people?

BTW-I absolutely agree with you!

[CaroleSS]

Wow, thank you….I’m flattered! :o

 

I guess I just don’t understand why some people find it necessary to be so venomous. I thought we were in this ‘together’, to share thoughts and ideas to make our cruising experiences better. I’m not usually one to complain, but this one child had such an impact upon ALL the tables around us that I felt compelled to simply ask parents to be thoughtful. Along the way I guess I insulted parents, Windjammer folk and inferred that kids should be banned from the planet! If I have offended any of you, I humbly apologize.

 

As I’ve mentioned before, I never intended my post to end up on the family board. It was just my thoughts as they related to our most recent experience and a gentle reminder for us ALL to be aware of the others around us. Whether they be drunks, hecklers, line cutters, seat savers, alcohol smugglers or crying babies, we all have to share the same space and we all need to be considerate of others.

 

I certainly understand that children come with ‘the package’. We certainly took our kids on many an adventure and wouldn’t have traded it for anything in the world. BUT as many of you have pointed out, we were aware of their impact upon others and acted accordingly. I breast fed my kids and on many occasions spent time in the bathroom feeding my kids while everyone else enjoyed dining or whatever. At first I was angry because I too wanted to spend time with friends, but eventually learned that I was being selfish in expecting everyone else to accommodate my wants/wishes. (Just remember that this was 30 years ago and times and public sentiment have changed over the years). I decided that there would be plenty of time for socializing and that special time I spent with my boys was all too fleeting and I should treasure those moments. It was a 'moment of clarity' to say the least!

 

I look forward to my time with my grandkids on cruises – but I promise they will be behaved!

 

Again, if I have offended anyone, I sincerely apologize.

[poppetts]

Personally i think the OP should have moved tables or dining room. Time to look at river cruises or the QM2, much less chance of kids there , or better still stay at home!![/quote]

How incredibly rude! And I thought Australians are such nice people- aparently not all of them:rolleyes:.

 

I didnt mean to be rude in any way and will definatley take back the

"stay at home" quote, but i was really dumbfounded as to why the problem wasnt sorted out, with the staff and or the parents at the time it was happening, we have all been in places when there are out of control kids and i am sure a quick word in the parents and staff members ears could have soved this drama. Personally if a kid or kids were pissing me off that much i would have been into the head waiters ear quicker than a rat up a drain pipe, then if no result, the parents.

[cruisingcanadian]

 

I didnt mean to be rude in any way and will definatley take back the

"stay at home" quote, but i was really dumbfounded as to why the problem wasnt sorted out, with the staff and or the parents at the time it was happening, we have all been in places when there are out of control kids and i am sure a quick word in the parents and staff members ears could have soved this drama. Personally if a kid or kids were pissing me off that much i would have been into the head waiters ear quicker than a rat up a drain pipe, then if no result, the parents.

 

Now you made me laugh:D.OK,glad you are taking back the "bad" quote,and I can start again to look forward to my first cruise to Australia and meeting all the nice,friendly,considerate people there;).

[NewSalt]

Meggie,

 

There are many folks on these boards who whouldn't DREAM of leaving their little one home. They must spend every waking hour together. I am like you. I believe DH and I need time together, ALONE, to keep the marriage healthy. Then we also spend time as a family. The balance works best for us. Good for you that you've decided to do this. You won't regret it! ;)

 

Thanks so much for the advice on how to keep a marriage healthy. When DD was little, there was barely enough money for one vacation a year, so we chose to make those family vacations. Now that she is married and has a LO of her own, we enjoy vacationing with her little family too.

 

In spite of this, our "unhealthy" marriage is staggering along toward its forty-fifth year. But I did point out to DH how misguided we are when he came by for a kiss before heading outside to work in the garden. He's not worried.

[yj2cute]

Thanks so much for the advice on how to keep a marriage healthy. When DD was little, there was barely enough money for one vacation a year, so we chose to make those family vacations. Now that she is married and has a LO of her own, we enjoy vacationing with her little family too.

 

In spite of this, our "unhealthy" marriage is staggering along toward its forty-fifth year. But I did point out to DH how misguided we are when he came by for a kiss before heading outside to work in the garden. He's not worried.

 

Excuse me, i don't understand why you felt the need to be sarcastic but if you reread my post you will see that I said "I believe we need time alone for OUR marriage". Congratulations on your many years of wedded bliss. You do what works for you and I'll do what works for me, ok?

 

Sent from my DROID2 using Tapatalk 2

[donaldsc]

Cant say that I disagree but at the same time you too had the oppurtunity to visit other venues for your dining. As you said, they paid for their cruise as well.

 

Why should the OP have to move one it was someone else's screaming brats that were creating a commotion?

 

DON

[Onessa]

Excuse me, i don't understand why you felt the need to be sarcastic but if you reread my post you will see that I said "I believe we need time alone for OUR marriage". Congratulations on your many years of wedded bliss. You do what works for you and I'll do what works for me, ok?

 

Sent from my DROID2 using Tapatalk 2

 

Yj2cute -- I found Newsalt's sarcasim right in line with your smugness. Why DREAM needed to all caps and the comments about some people needing to spend every waking moment together did come off, to me at least, as smacking of self satisfaction. You choose to take vacations without you kids, salt chose not to or perhaps could not. To each their own.

[yj2cute]

Yj2cute -- I found Newsalt's sarcasim right in line with your smugness. Why DREAM needed to all caps and the comments about some people needing to spend every waking moment together did come off, to me at least, as smacking of self satisfaction. You choose to take vacations without you kids, salt chose not to or perhaps could not. To each their own.

 

Actually, I chose to do both. I was just pointing out that I am not one of those parents who can't leave my children's side. I in no way commented on the health on anyone else's marriage. Just stated what works for my own.

[scarlett81]

Perhaps its spending too much time on this website that is deteriorating everyone's marriage, and taking attention away from our "brats" when we could be parenting them!

LOL

People, this is a cruise, not Dr. Phil! :rolleyes:

[Onessa]

Actually, I chose to do both. I was just pointing out that I am not one of those parents who can't leave my children's side. I in no way commented on the health on anyone else's marriage. Just stated what works for my own.

 

I don't really care about how you choose to cruise (with family, without family, or any combination thereof).

 

I was responding to your response of "Excuse me, i don't understand why you felt the need to be sarcastic".

 

You chose to put dream in all caps, you chose to over-exaggerate that those folks who would not "dream" of leaving their little ones home while they cruised "must spend every waking hour together".

 

I was simply trying to help you understand that your choice of emphasis and exaggeration may have caused readers such as Newsalt to feel that your post was smug and judgmental. And perhaps that is why Newsalt chose to be sarcastic.

 

It is obvious that my attempt to help you understand, flew right over your head and you chose to zero in on only my last sentence and then twist it. Maybe I am just over-sensitive because I'm living in Wisconsin where every other ad on TV right now is a political ad twisting facts and making judgments about one side or the other in one of the recall races (and I've literally been robo-called three times while trying to type this!)

 

You said you could not understand, I tried to help you understand. My bad!

[yj2cute]

Thank you so much, Onessa, for helping me to understand someone else's response.

 

In any event, as I said before, everyone can do whatever they want, as long as they control their children, which is what I did when I took them ANYWHERE.

 

So, since this thread has run its course, I'm moving on. Happy sails!

[GOLDENBONNY]

Cant say that I disagree but at the same time you too had the oppurtunity to visit other venues for your dining. As you said, they paid for their cruise as well.

 

:confused::confused::mad: what? i guesss someone who make noise and truble should leave

[bus man]

Maybe I am just over-sensitive because I'm living in Wisconsin where every other ad on TV right now is a political ad twisting facts and making judgments about one side or the other in one of the recall races (and I've literally been robo-called three times while trying to type this!)

 

I don't want to turn this into a discussion of your opinions on the recall race (I have other sites I visit for that purpose), but whichever way you went, I'll bet you're glad it's over! :D

[nationsgirl89]

These damn posts infuriate me. Not because i feel like the original post is not ... logical, but because of the stereotyping it fuels. I have a 9 month old and we eat out all the time. I prepare ahead of the time and have an arsenal of tools at my disposal. Snacks, loads of toys, ready to go bottles, videos(last resort) and other life saving tactics. If my child even starts getting fussy i immediately remove her until things get better. These posts help fuel the stereotypes that make people intolerant of children. I realize that my style of parenting is different than some others, BUT PLEASE, do not assume that every child you see is going to be a terror and furthermore that every parent has the same disregard for other people. BE kind don't anticipate that every child will be awful.

 

Plus in my opinion posting about this topic doesn't seem like it would do much good and is just an opportunity to be rude. The reason i feel like this is because if the parents allows their kids to be that disruptive do you really think a post is gonna change the way they handle their kids? Just saying!

 

STOP STEREOTYPING PARENTS WITH CHILDREN BECAUSE OF THOSE WHO ARE INCONSIDERATE!

[nursemommy7578]

lol I was shopping with a friend and her 2 young ones. Neither of the kids wanted to be there and sure as heck let everyone know it. I kept insisting that we leave, but my friend told me that she needed to teach her kids that they dont get their own way! She said she'd rather have them screaming/causing a scene nomatter where they are, so she can get her stuff done (shopping laundry whatever).

needless to say I dont go shopping with her and her kids anymore:)

[bplazo]

Maybe families with small children should have there own MDR.

[sopranos]

Maybe families with small children should have there own MDR.

Are you serious?

[bplazo]

Are you serious?

 

Actually, no I am not serious because so far on all of our cruises I have not seen any misbeving children in the MDR. In fact, they were better behaved then the adults on our last cruise.

[bralli]

Actually, no I am not serious because so far on all of our cruises I have not seen any misbeving children in the MDR. In fact, they were better behaved then the adults on our last cruise.

 

Understanding you weren't serious, I actually love your idea of a "family" dining room. The only problem is that family cruising is obviously really seasonal. The last cruise I went on (I think it was a June cruise to Alaska), several of the staff in the kid's center which was absolutely packed during my cruise said there were hardly any kids on the ship in May. So it would be hard to really predictably dedicate a particular dining room to just families on a regular basis.