Michelle’s Journey to Paradise – 2/28/13

[Vigorosity]

NOT MY HUSBAND, we are both happily divorced, LOL. He does smoke the wood tips, I am not sure about Royale, is that a brand?

 

Anyway loving your review, who needs to be productive at work, that is so over rated

 

Oops! Must have read that wrong. Please forgive me! I know what a mistake that is, lol! :D

 

Royale is just a flavor. Like apple or wine or whatnot. It's very rich, without being overpowering. It can be a little tricky to find, but is at some gas stations.

 

[Vigorosity]

The Third Day:

 

 

After playing rescue mission on the runaway hat and checking out the rocky side of the beach, we went over to the left side. This is not the best beach for swimming. However, we did see a few snorkelers about a 100 meters away! Unless you’re brave, I’d bring water shoes to go out any further than the drop off in the water.

 

 

I splashed, played, and went out as far as I dared, while a patient Jason sat on the beach for a minute. We didn’t bring any towels, which I recommend! Figuring we had a lot more to see, we quickly explored the bar on the other side of the road, before heading off (there’s two separate ones). This almost makes me want to like beer…

 

We found a friendly beach dog...

 

…and an unfriendly beach dog!

 

Figuring a growling puppy was as good a sign as any to get the move on, we piled in our wonderful Jeep and headed on our way. Little did the Jeep know, it was the first round of a lot of sand on its floorboards…

[samsgal040503]

I'm loving your review! We are from Knoxville too and are going on our first cruise next month, the Ecstasy... so excited! :)

[Vigorosity]

The Third Day:

 

Up next on our trip was Playa Bonita! Again it was too early for anyone else to be around (we had practically the entire road to ourselves!) This is probably nice open-air restaurant when it’s really busy, but it was still in the process of opening (it had to be around 10am Mexico time.) We awkwardly explored a little of the restaurant…

 

However, right down its little rocky beach is a little structure which lent itself to my absolute favorite picture of this entire trip…

 

 

For some reason, I thought that was the coolest thing in the world. It was like a beach tree house! (One of my many obsessions…along with cheese!) There were also a lot of brainrocks.

 

 

Time to get a move on! We stopped at a place called Diablo’s. They were the pushiest to get you to buy anything- a drink, a blanket, a mask, jewelry, whatever! BUT there is a beautiful beach across the street.

 

The water and sand were gorgeous! There was also a volleyball set-up. Even though no swimming was allowed, that didn’t stop me from getting in the water a little! This beach is also where Jason thought it would be really fun/cool/exciting to do a backflip! He may have messed up on the landing a little, but he messed up something else even more….he lost our keys to the Jeep!

[Fighterone]

The First Night:

 

 

After exploring the ship a little, we decided that it was now or never. The waterslide was empty. The day was as hot as it was going to get….and the waterslide was as cold as it was going to get! It was also very, very slow. It doesn’t look too big, but it seems to take forever before it spits you out into a tub of freezing salt water. We dried off and decided to roast in the sun for a bit….and reward ourselves with our first drinks!

 

 

This is a Mango Twist. Jason got a Mocha Chocolate Getaway (which was far too alcoholic for him to really enjoy.) Shortly after, it was time to go to the beloved Mustard Drill. We were stationed in the aft lounge, so we got to sit in those round, mustard-colored couches. These are our feelings towards this whole ordeal…

 

 

….can you tell who the first time cruiser is? Lol!

 

We decided to treat ourselves to another drink, seeing as we had to sit through that terrible vacation-ruining safety briefing. We went back to the room, ordered a corkscrew through room service, grabbed wine and went to watch the sail-away. Jason got himself the Cruiser drink (don’t let that fool you, it’s pretty much a Sex on the Beach). Goodbye, Tampa!

 

 

Tired from the drive, Jason decided a nap was in order. Since I generally have too much energy, I went up to watch the sunset and the crossing under the bridge. It was just a little windy up on the top deck, though.

 

 

The bridge really does look like it’s going to hit.

 

 

I grabbed some strawberry neapolitan (this is heavenly!) from the dessert station, realized someone drank all of the wine from my glass, and figured I should head back to the room to jump on the bed once more and wake up Jason for dinner.

Now, I know what you look like! Sorry doesn't ring a bell. I will ask the DH if he recognizes you. Loving your review!

[Vigorosity]

Now, I know what you look like! Sorry doesn't ring a bell. I will ask the DH if he recognizes you. Loving your review!

 

I think I have a picture of you, lol!

I posted it over on the roll call board. :)

[deedle7544]

hee hee, no worries, I am loving your review :)

 

I donlt think he likes the flavored ones, then again I never buy them for him, so who knows.

 

Thanks for distracting me at work today

 

And don't leave us hanging with lost keys!

[Vigorosity]

The Third Day:

 

Keeping all my calm, I realized that maybe I could start a life in Mexico selling art or trinkets to cruise ship passengers and live in a little colorful house and learn to love habaneros and become a really, really good snorkeler. Regardless, we both rushed over to the beach to begin the search for the missing keys. Of course, they were right around the backflip area. That could have been a lot worse!

 

I banned all flips, cartwheels, and tumbles henceforth and we were on our way again! I heard a noise right about this time as well….our stomachs! As luck would have it, Coconuts was just up the way. We pulled into the little parking lot around 11am Mexico time and the man sitting by his little shop asked us when we had to be back at the boat. When we told him 5pm Mexico time, he glanced at his watch with a concerned look and said “You guys should have enough time.” Wait….what? 6 hours?! We went ahead and walked up the stairs, passing signs like this…

 

..and this…

 

…and eventually made our way to the bar with signs like this.

 

There happened to be only two other people there beside the staff - just two old dudes drinking beer quietly at the bar. We decided to explore the little area (and animals!) for a bit. First was a pretty white parrot who I think was called Chimichanga.

 

And the second pretty parrot. This one’s name was Tequila, I believe.

 

And Coconuts had achieved the impossible. They translated a sign into every language known to man!

[Vigorosity]

The Third Day:

 

After getting my fill of parrots, puppies, and a large, fat cat, it was time to get another fill! They gave us a menu which was written on a piece of wood, front and back. We ordered a Sex at Coconuts and a Screwdriver for drinks. To eat, we got chicken nachos and shrimp fajitas. The food is pricey, beware! About one second after placing our order with the waiter, I’m watching the bartender make two drinks in large glasses. They are incredibly large glasses in which he fills over halfway full with just alcohol! I turn to Jason and joke “Man, whoever ordered those are planning to get lit today.”

 

…wouldn’t you know, those were our drinks! They were amazing, too. I think they were about 85 pesos apiece (roughly $6.50) They gave us some nachos and salsa to munch on while we waited for our food, and it was Spicy with a capital ‘S’.

 

While we were busy entertaining ourselves reading the numerous funny signs around the place, a wonderful smell wafted our way. Our food was incredibly prompt and we moved it over to a table for a little extra room.

 

 

Oh my god, it was good. I don’t even like guacamole but this stuff is fresh and wonderful. Order this if you ever find yourself at Coconuts! Finishing my drink, I decided to order a Melon Ball. It was as delicious as the last drink…and as strong! Needless to say, I was feeling all right. After we got our bill ($54 USD), we sat and enjoyed the scenery for a minute and an employee gave me a grasshopper!

 

 

…made out of leaves, of course!

 

We just didn’t want to leave without looking around more. It’s that breathtaking and beautiful and every other adjective you can use to describe it.

 

Can someone take me back, please?

 

Overall, Coconuts has their game down pat. Great views, prompt service, cute animals, a nice atmosphere that was playing American music, funny signs, a guy making (cost-free) grasshoppers to impress the ladies, good food and strong drinks make it worth the kinda pricey $54. We had to completely drag and force ourselves from these views and we saw the alligator on the way out! I forget his name.

 

Goodbye, Coconuts! I promise to come back!

[indygirl76]

Fabulous review, I love it!! I wish I had discovered the joy of cruising when I was in college with awesome guy friends. :) Can't wait to read the rest.

[Diamondback]

The First Night:

 

This was also the first of very, very many attempts of Carnival employees inquiring about Jason’s ethnicity. (And of course, the start of my teasing that he should be working on a cruise ship, too)

 

I've read a few trip reports on CC and you my dear have the best so far! Great photos - love what you photograph as well as how you frame the shot. Lots of humor - from joking to sarcasm to reality-is-stranger-than-fiction. And, you are a talented writer. My pet peeve on these boards is the bad grammar, punctuation and spelling ad nauseam - none of which you have!!!

 

And, since you raised the point, and I have been the victim of the same, I'll take my own guess. Is Jason Filipino?

[Vigorosity]

I'm loving your review! We are from Knoxville too and are going on our first cruise next month, the Ecstasy... so excited! :)

 

Oh gosh! You must be adoring this cold weather, then. :rolleyes: Hope you have as much fun as I did!

 

Fabulous review, I love it!! I wish I had discovered the joy of cruising when I was in college with awesome guy friends. :) Can't wait to read the rest.

 

Yeah, I adore it! But I think I like anything that gets me out of the house, lol. Thanks!:)

 

I've read a few trip reports on CC and you my dear have the best so far! Great photos - love what you photograph as well as how you frame the shot. Lots of humor - from joking to sarcasm to reality-is-stranger-than-fiction. And, you are a talented writer. My pet peeve on these boards is the bad grammar, punctuation and spelling ad nauseam - none of which you have!!!

 

And, since you raised the point, and I have been the victim of the same, I'll take my own guess. Is Jason Filipino?

 

Thank you so much, you're too flattering! :o I keep thinking when I'm writing this about how my grammar is too informal, lol!

 

....and nope. Jason isn't Filipino! Even more fun is guessing his age. :p

[deedle7544]

I am going with Jason being 25 and Hispanic.

 

Need more of your rview or I am going to have to get some work done.

[Vigorosity]

I am going with Jason being 25 and Hispanic.

 

Need more of your rview or I am going to have to get some work done.

 

Nope and nope! I don't have enough time with class till 5, work till 11, then ladies night with two of my best friends! Sorry. :(

[deedle7544]

Have fun at ladies' night. Guess I'll get some work done today...no, I think I'll work on some cruise planning instead.

[Vigorosity]

Have fun at ladies' night. Guess I'll get some work done today...no, I think I'll work on some cruise planning instead.

 

That sounds more fun! Where are you going next? :)

[JaniceB]

Loving your review. You found many interesting things to take pictures of and your pictures of yourself are great. I have always wanted a picture with my hair blowing away on the ship. Great job, looking forward to more.

[Mrs.C05]

I love, love, love your review!!! Your review is awesome! This puts me in total cruise mode, 1 week early. Can't wait for next weekend!!!

[deedle7544]

The not-my-husband and I are going on the 6 day western caribbean Freedom September 29. I'm also going Sep 7 on Fascination with my kids and ex husband.

 

Guess which one I am looking forward to more?

[Blue C]

Great review. You are totally cracking me up.

[Vigorosity]

Loving your review. You found many interesting things to take pictures of and your pictures of yourself are great. I have always wanted a picture with my hair blowing away on the ship. Great job, looking forward to more.

 

Thank you! And "hair blowing in the wind" sounds way more romantic than it actually was, lol! :p

 

I love, love, love your review!!! Your review is awesome! This puts me in total cruise mode, 1 week early. Can't wait for next weekend!!!

 

That's an awesome feeling, maybe even parallel to actually being on the cruise! It's almost like you are already on vacation.

 

The not-my-husband and I are going on the 6 day western caribbean Freedom September 29. I'm also going Sep 7 on Fascination with my kids and ex husband.

 

Guess which one I am looking forward to more?

 

Those both sound pretty fun, though. Your kids have some pretty awesome parents. My divorced parents wouldn't be in the same room for my sister and I, let alone take a cruise together!

 

Great review. You are totally cracking me up.

 

Thank you! :D

[Vigorosity]

The Third Day:

 

Oh gosh, where did I leave off? Oh yeah…saying farewell to my new favorite place on Earth! We actually wandered over to the beach that was owned by the rentals to the left of Coconuts. I –finally- got to swim-swim. No just moseying around and dipping a couple toes in here! The water was about as warm as my blood after that spicy salsa. It felt phenomenal. Funny enough, I’m actually allergic to sand mites from ocean beaches (and paying the price now!) but it was worth every single second.

 

I had enough sense to drag myself out of the water eventually so we could get on our merry way and experience even more. (That damn opportunist coming out again!) We climbed up into our Jeep, lit up a Black and Mild, realized that we were the luckiest people in the world at that one moment, and immediately stopped dead in our tracks. A sign read “Free Margaritas.”

 

….they really know how to get a girl. It was the tequila factory/ranch/plant/whatever. I had briefly read about it and thought I would have no interest at all. We walked up to the little building and an overly excited man told us it would be $10 each including a “free” margarita. A bit leery, we did it anyway. They ushered us into a completely empty open-air restaurant and let us enjoy our drinks….

 

Well, this tour ended up being more than worth it. The man, whose name I won’t remember for the life of me, should be a comedian. He told us about the differences in good tequila (for yourself), decent tequila (for your friends), and mescal with a worm (for your mother-in-law.) He also gave us samples of each tequila, which ended up being probably seven or eight of them. He also overused the word “hoochie coochie.” Jason purchased a 350ml bottle that tasted similar and better than Baileys Irish Crème for $17 and we were on our happy way.

 

Apparently I was having too good of a time because there aren’t any other pictures of Cozumel! We drove through downtown, which was fascinating in itself to see the names of restaurants in Spanish and see punk-kids skateboarding along the street. After a bit of confusion on where to return the Jeep, we figured it out and wandered through the port area. I bought a couple bottles of liquor, a keychain, and a Nacho-Libre-esque mask for my best friend then headed down the pier. We were excited to see the Carnival Victory and Celebrity Constellation pulled right up next to our house!

 

Immediately upon returning to the cabin, I did what most anyone would do…

 

…take creepy pictures in my friend’s mask...

 

….then order room service chocolate cake. Looking back on it, I guess my biggest regret of this whole cruise is that I didn’t actually answer the door wearing that weird wrestling mask.

[Fighterone]

The Third Day:

 

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...

 

I have a couple of those humongous glasses and love them! I am looking for you on FB. Have you checked me out there yet? I will be deleting my photo album link in a few days and would like to befriend you.

Loving the read here and the great pictures. Could Jason from India, Pakistan or Sri Lanka? You have piquéed my curiosity with the mention of the crew's asking the question.

DH hung his big Coz purchase yesterday; the {{non Talavera}} 22" sun. I will post a picture on my FB wall later and maybe a small attachment here!

[Vigorosity]

I have a couple of those humongous glasses and love them! I am looking for you on FB. Have you checked me out there yet? I will be deleting my photo album link in a few days and would like to befriend you.

 

Loving the read here and the great pictures. Could Jason from India, Pakistan or Sri Lanka? You have piquéed my curiosity with the mention of the crew's asking the question.

 

DH hung his big Coz purchase yesterday; the {{non Talavera}} 22" sun. I will post a picture on my FB wall later and maybe a small attachment here!

 

Yeah, I'll make sure to do that!

 

He's not from any of those places, either! Lol.

 

And that's a really great souvenir...all I got was a silly sun keychain. :p:p

[deedle7544]

I'm going with Egypt now, one of the hottest guys I ever met was Egyptian, and Jason reminds me of him, except Ahmad had dreds.

 

love that you added to the review after ladies night, and I am still cracking up over the B&M's. I have no idea why that strikes me as so funny.