Funny Cruise Ship Stories

[dan40]

There are few better shows than standing on your dockside balcony, promenade, or lido decks and watching the reboarding at Cozumel. From about an hour before sailing time on, the C&C patrons [victims?] will be lined up. Having been a star of this show, I'm not sure if its better to watch or participate. The watchers have more clear memories of the reboarding for sure.:D

 

Dan:D

[dexter727]

My wife and I were on the Dawn Princess last October and we liked to have a few cups of coffee each morning outside the Horizon Court where it is one deck above and overlooks the pool. Very relaxing at 6:00am. I looked down and there was an older gentleman swimming laps in the pool. He was at least 70+ but kind of a Jack LaLane type. Anyway, he gets out of the pool and gets in one of the poolside rinse showers. Next thing we know, we pulls out a bar of soap and starts lathering up. My wife and I look at eachother, confirm that we're seeing the same thing and then realize that not only is he soaping up, he's also naked! Unbelievable... But that's not all. After he was done showering, he gets out of the shower and walks toward us, the length of the pool (right below us) and goes to get a towel which was resting on a chair right below us. We were totally in shock by this point and just cracking up, not believing our eyes. We kind of lost sight of him at this point but there was a fast moving crew member going in that direction so I'm guessing that someone said something to somebody. It was hilarious and won't be forgotten. :eek:

[hommebronze]

We often take our stuffed dog, Scruffy, on cruises to find out what our cabin steward will do (i.e. animal towels get boring).

Well, on one cruise our cabin steward did not speak much english. Seemingly, it was reported that we had a dog on board.

 

So, on formal night as we are getting into gown and tuxedo we get a knock on our cabin door. I, dressed in tuxedo, opened the door and saw a big man dressed in his officer's uniform, with our cabin steward skulking behind him.

He said to me. Excuse me, it has been reported you have a dog in your cabin. I looked back at my wife and told her,"...scruffy has been reported." The officer went on to say, that he would have to quarantine the dog....I pointed my hand at scruffy who was sitting on our port window and said, "Sir, that is our dog!"

 

The look in his eyes and the apparent need to disappear at that moment was priceless!!

 

If anyone would like to see Scruffy, go here>>

 

http://community.webshots.com/photo/263200454/263215212fZyeif

 

Scruffy loves to cruise....:>))

[suntan]

Three passengers (of which I was one) wearing the exact same bathing suit on our Celebrity cruise this past February. Now, I confess that one of the people is a friend of mine (I didn't know she bought the same bathing suit as I). The third person we did not know at all. Needless to say we turned quite a few heads that day.:D

[WFF]

My brother in law and family were on their first cruise disembarking in Ft Lauderdale. A day or 2 before the end of the cruise they got the ships notice of disembarkation which included their fight number and color coded baggage tags. They had arranged for the cruise lines transportation to the airport.

When they left the ship they got on the bus and assumed their luggage was sent to the airlines.

When they arrived home in NY, they discovered that they had no luggage.

They had left their luggage on the pier!

 

PS They had to pay shipping costs to get their luggage returned.

[Nirrakel]

It was my first cruise last month, and I really enjoyed getting dressed up for the formal night, I bought a new cocktail dress, I don't usually get dressed up much at home and I was very excited about how sophisticated I looked and demanded my partner get a shot of me with the Alaskan scenery in the background. Opened the outside door, took a couple of steps out onto the deck and my skirt blew straight up over my head - very classy! ;)

[Iamthesea]

Now that is funny, however I can see how it could happen to a first timer.:D

[cruiseorbust]

This happened on a cruise ship in Alaska....

 

We went in late May and the ship's passengers were mostly 60's to 80's, maybe older. Anyways, I was walking up to one of the top decks when I noticed an elderly gentleman with a rolling walker trying to catch an elevator. (There were a set of three in a row) Apparently, he had been there awhile when I arrived. He was headed for the last elevator when the doors closed.

 

I asked him if he needed any help. He told me that he had been trying to get back to his room to meet with his wife. Everytime he pushed the button, the elevator at the opposite end would open; by the time he moved along (apparently very slowly), the doors would close and he would miss it.

 

I helped him catch an elevator. He told me he was sure his wife would be worried; he had wasted at least 10 minutes trying to get to open doors before they closed (elevator doors).

 

I couldn't help but laugh to myself at the visual picture. All I can say is "God Bless" the elderly; we will all be there too soon!

[Grumm]

Always remember that senility costs nothing!

[zonicruiser]

Love the Stories!!! Please keep them coming.

 

 

After 5 cruises I have nothing to share.:(

[Host CJSKIDS]

Last cruise I went on - the last night I hit the casino.. my parents went to bed in one cabin, and my daughter went to bed in the other.. it was just me out and about.

 

At 2:00am I realzied I better get back and drag my luggage out into the hall for the porters... so I went back to the room, put on my night gown, pulled my luggage out and *bang* the slammed shut......and locked... I was out in the hall with my nightgown on... no robe :eek: So I banged on my door, but my daughter wouldn't wake up... so I banged on my parents door, got no answer, they were sound asleep.

 

I heard some thumping down the hall and saw an older man pulling his luggage out - I approached him (so embarrassed) and asked If I could use his phone as I was locked out.. He let me into his cabin - it was a tiny inside cabin and his wife was asleep - I was standing next to her, dialling the front desk - no answer... I noticed her teeth were in a cup of water next to the phone :D - still no answer, so I called my room, no answer... so I called my parents room.. FINALLY like after 30 rings - my Dad answered...

 

I thanked the man for helping me, just as his wife was waking up to find me in the room and asking him what was going on LOL

 

So I head back to our cabin and there is my Dad out in the hall in his underwear - you know - I lived 39 years without seeing him like that - and I hope I live another 39 years before I have to see that again!

 

This is priceless, thanks for the laugh!

[Corinne Marie]

This is one of those stories where you would have to be there to see this:

An elderly couple (friends of our family) were on a cruise in Asia about 10 years ago. The husband had the early signs of Alzheimers. He got up in the middle of the night to use the restroom and ended up in the hallway and the door locked behind him. He was in his birthday suite which is how he slept at night. He was rather large and I imagine not a pretty sight to see this way. His wife soon discovered that he was not in the room and she took off in search of him and the door slammed behind her and she forgot the key card. She was in a skimpy nightie, she was also rather heavy. She finally found her husband roaming the halls and they had to knock on someone's door and ask them to not open their door but to call down to the purser's desk and get someone to come up and help them. This happened to be an asian gentleman. I can only imagine his face when he saw this couple. What a horrific scene this would have been. Everytime we think of this story we just laugh until we are almost in tears. They were also on a really classy cruiseline at this time.

CMG

[Corinne Marie]

This is one of those stories where you would have to be there to see this:

An elderly couple (friends of our family) were on a cruise in Asia about 10 years ago. The husband had the early signs of Alzheimers. He got up in the middle of the night to use the restroom and ended up in the hallway and the door locked behind him. He was in his birthday suite which is how he slept at night. He was rather large and I imagine not a pretty sight to see this way. His wife soon discovered that he was not in the room and she took off in search of him and the door slammed behind her and she forgot the key card. She was in a skimpy nightie, she was also rather heavy. She finally found her husband roaming the halls and they had to knock on someone's door and ask them to not open their door but to call down to the purser's desk and get someone to come up and help them. This happened to be an asian gentleman. I can only imagine his face when he saw this couple. What a horrific scene this would have been. Everytime we think of this story we just laugh until we are almost in tears. They were also on a really classy cruiseline at this time.

CMG

[CroozBlooz]

A number of years ago (probably 15 or so) before we were married, a buddy and I went on a cruise. One of the excursions we took was a booze cruise in St. Thomas called the Kon Tiki. All the rum punch you can drink. (Parenthetically, even though I don't consider myself very limber, I won a limbo contest).

 

Anyway, suffice to say both my buddy and I were no worse for the wear. When we got back to the ship, he could barely walk. As we walked down the hallway to our cabin, he simply passed out while walking. For some reason, I found this extremely funny and ran back to the cabin to get a camera to take his picture. When I returned to the scene, the ship's doctor was there trying to figure out if he was alive or dead. I snapped his picture while the doc was looking him over.

 

We took him back to the cabin, where he slept it off for the entire next day.

 

I told him the story, but he never believed me. However, later in the cruise all sorts of people pointed at him and whispered. Apparently the "news" had gotten around the ship.

 

The last night of the cruise we were in the nightclub and several of the officers were there, including the doctor. He came up to my friend and asked him if he recognized him (my friend did not) and said he was glad to see that he was doing better.

 

When I developed the roll of film, no picture of passed out buddy on the roll.

 

I guess you had to be there, but the whole thing was pretty funny.

[coiran]

On one of our cruises on the Sun Princess - I was out starting to do my daily mile on the promenade deck - a little old lady walked out, with a cane, and asked me "how many times around for a mile" - I answered "three" - then she asked me "how long does it take" - I answered "I do it at a med/fast pace in about 16 minutes" - she said "when my husband and I walked a mile - it only took 10 minutes" - I answered "that may be right but on a ship we walk nautical miles" - she just said "Oh" and walked along at about a mile a day. Sweet old lady - I got the impression that when her husband and her walked he would stop at 10 minutes and tell her they just did a mile.

 

Ron

[MrsBoo]

Yeah, he probably also told her that _____________ was 10 inches too;)

[RSGS315]

This happened on the Golden Princess a few years ago.

My husband had gone to the movies one afternoon, and I started to get ready for dinner. After my shower I put on a light robe and decided to sit on the balcony to let my hair dry. I didn't hear the cabin steward knocking on the door, but I noticed a shadow in the cabin, so I opened the balcony door a bit to see who it was, saw the cabin steward, who was hanging up some shirts my husband had sent to the laundry, and returned to my chair on the balcony. Well, an hour or so went by, it started to get too cool and my hair was dry, so I decided to go back in the cabin and finish dressing and put on some make-up. I couldn't believe it, but the balcony door was locked. It seems that the steward noticed it open ajar, not seeing me, locked it and left. I had seen many people on the balconies below earlier on, but by now everyone was either at first sitting or dressing for dinner. Here I was on the veranda with no way to get in. I had no idea what time it was, when the movie would be over, so my husband could rescue me. I finally heard some commotion in the next cabin, and someone opening the balcony door. I called over and asked them to please page our steward, so he could open the door for me. The poor guy felt so badly and couldn't stop apologizing. He didn't think that he had locked the door just closed it. But since you can only lock the door from the inside it had to be him. I laughed about it and assured him that it was no big deal, and that this was just between the two of us, and of course our neighbor.

Ginnie

[Jaxsonbrownie]

On our cruise last year on The Grand, I had a few too many margarhitas in Cozumel. That evening when I got into bed, I forgot to remove the chocolates of my pillow before retiring for the night. You should have seen my husbands face the next morning when I got out of bed! The sheets and I were covered in chocolate (and it didn't look like choc. if you know what I mean!) We never laughed so hard! Needless to say, the room steward left the chocolates on the night stand the next night!:D Jaxson

[dan40]

On an NCL cruise, we returned from C&Cs' in Cozumel. We were in typical return from C&C shape, drunk as loons. There was a piano bar above the bridge. The lady was playing old songs and awarding prizes to whoever could "Name That Song". T-shirts, coffee mugs, hats, etc. Neither Barb nor I are in any way connected to music or very sharp about old songs. But in our "highly relaxed" state, we would yell out a title on the first note played. And we were right every time. Won every prize, much to the pleasure? of all the others in the lounge.

Barb took my pic while we were there. If you'd look up sloppy drunk in the dictionary, that picture should be there. What an endearing couple we must have been.

 

Dan

[spongerob]

We were on a back to back cruise that had a rather large CC group joining the second leg. The first week we were on board, I arranged to have Skywalkers opened up for us one afternoon, with snacks and bartenders, so we could have a mid-cruise get-together.

 

On the appointed day, I went up to check on the preparations a few minutes before the rest of the group was slated to arrive. The waiters and bartender were setting things up, and to my surprise, quite a large group had gathered on one side of the lounge. I promptly sauntered up to the group and asked if they were here for the cocktail party.

 

I was met with stunned silence and a few stares.

 

They were the Friends of Bill W group.

 

As I slunk away, apologizing profusely, the waiter was putting up a sign directing us to the other side of Skywalkers.

[beckers]

We were on a back to back cruise that had a rather large CC group joining the second leg. The first week we were on board, I arranged to have Skywalkers opened up for us one afternoon, with snacks and bartenders, so we could have a mid-cruise get-together.

 

On the appointed day, I went up to check on the preparations a few minutes before the rest of the group was slated to arrive. The waiters and bartender were setting things up, and to my surprise, quite a large group had gathered on one side of the lounge. I promptly sauntered up to the group and asked if they were here for the cocktail party.

 

I was met with stunned silence and a few stares.

 

They were the Friends of Bill W group.

 

As I slunk away, apologizing profusely, the waiter was putting up a sign directing us to the other side of Skywalkers.

 

That sounds like something I would do.:eek:

 

Becky

[cruise puppy]

Great thread! Love the funny stories. :p

[surrocruiser]

I went on a cruise with my 2 daughters, my parents, my sister and her friend, my brother and his 2 friends. We are all in 4 different cabins as far apart as we could be. My girls loved kids crew and went every evening. THe rest of us did our own thing until dinner. Dropped my girls at 6 and went up to the observation deck to take pictures of the sunset and the storm of to our west. The storm started picking up and the wind kept blowing me against the railing so I decided it was time to go in. Apparently, I was up there longer than I thought b/c when I tried to go back down the gates were locked. There was nobody any where around. The pool below was closed and I had no idea when the next person would happen by. I waited for about 40 minutes (yelling and screaming in case someone could hear) when finally a couple passengers came up to the deck. They found one of the employees to come let me out. I went down to my family who were already eating dinner and looked so windblown not one of them knew what to think. To this day I'm still not sure where they though I was.

[criuisingurl079]

On VOS in may this year, my boyfriend and I were on one of the glass elevators form the promenade to our stateroom floor. It was just a gentleman and the two of us until it hit the next stop... a bunch of people hopped in and we took off. The man that was standing in the back left a very loud fart go, and we all had to keep quiet as if nothing happened until the next stop when he got off! Of course he acted like nothing happened, until he did it one more time shifting through the crowd leaving the elevator. We all broke into great laughter when the doors shut!

He had made quite a name for himself for the rest of the week with the people he shared that elevator with.:)

[mommykim]

Way back in 1993 hubby and I were on the Crown Princess through the Panama Canal. I was so excited to do doing the cabal that I did not sleep at all the night before so I was tired when I finally went to my room to take a nap. Well, I am in there for about 2 minutes when I notice that the side of the lock looks like it's about 6 inches from our window so I grab the video and start it rolling. We have this wonderful commentary on it about how nice all the workers are and see how they're waving, yadda yadda. Needless to say when I finished filiming and closed the drapes over the window I realized I had undressed for a nap and was wearing nothing but underwear :D