.......idle jottings

[COCOYOTE]

Yes, Hum is now shopping at the Big and Tall girl's boutique in Las Vegas

and having her (um, his) outfits shipped by poor Jim. Didn't I hint at this

in my previous post?

 

Can't wait for the crossing to see Hum turned out in her (damn it, his) new pant-suit for the Repeat Guests cocktail party. Rumor has it that a big LGBT

travel agency has secured the few remaining cabins in support of his "coming

out" declaration. The "choker chains" were a dead giveaway!

 

Am trying to imagine what a "first time" reader to this column must be thinking ... HA! But nearly a quarter million hits can't be wrong! :)

THIS is going to be a very interesting crossing. Tongues and quills are being sharpened to perfection. Shots across the bow for now but broadsides expected - the treasure of 15 days together. Can you imagine the stories to come (and the different points of view for the same story).

[Jim Avery]

Am trying to imagine what a "first time" reader to this column must be thinking ... HA! But nearly a quarter million hits can't be wrong! :)

 

Commander, they have either moved in with us here in Idle Jotting Land or are in therapy......:eek::D:D

[ho-hum]

Dear Friend, I would not impose upon you if you are under the weather but we all know even a Hum in less than finest form is better than most. Here's hoping for a speedy recovery.

 

Thank you for your warm regards although the the "hound" is a bit miffed as she believes there are differences between Alsatians and GSDs and would be pleased to acquaint you with a few of them should you visit on one of your future world tours.

 

Respect for the men and women of our military and police forces comes with very personal family connections from grandfather, to father, to each and every uncle, to brother and today our nephew was commissioned as a 2nd lieutenant in the US Army. We are honored, proud and thankful for their unselfish service to our country and communities.

 

Rest up and recover, dear Hum. We look forward to your observations when the muse strikes.

 

Well maybe if a certain someone was kind to Hum and ceased from admonishing Hum for lapses in style and content in his posts then maybe the muse would return.

 

A visit ! Certainly. Would love that (needs a bit of planning).

 

Yes the greatest respect for all those selfless men and women who protect us (whatever religion and creed). Great words COCOYOTE. Our freedom of speech and liberty to enjoy travelling and the "high life" would not be possible without them.

Every year in our country, we honour "the fallen" in various historic and current conflicts for the armed forces.

Why dont we have a day devoted to honouring those serving and who have served?

 

COCOYOTE dear chum, Hum came across this wonderful article about your namesake and kept it back in case you may be interested:

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/AeonMagazineEssays/~3/PMmGWsQuMgI/wildlife-management-is-really-a-misnomer-it-s-about-managing-people

[ho-hum]

Oh, my! What have I done now???

 

Don't act the all innocent Charlie !

 

By the way old chum, "The Boss" has an autobiography out but Hum guesses you knew that.

[ho-hum]

yes, hum is now shopping at the big and tall girl's boutique in las vegas

and having her (um, his) outfits shipped by poor jim. Didn't i hint at this

in my previous post?

 

Can't wait for the crossing to see hum turned out in her (damn it, his) new pant-suit for the repeat guests cocktail party. Rumor has it that a big lgbt

travel agency has secured the few remaining cabins in support of his "coming

out" declaration. The "choker chains" were a dead giveaway!

 

Am trying to imagine what a "first time" reader to this column must be thinking ... Ha! But nearly a quarter million hits can't be wrong! :)

 

blabber mouth !!!!!!

[ho-hum]

Aw, shucks......

 

.....so you're on our team right ?

What despicable Hum will do for a bottle of champagne !!

Oh Hum hates himself sometimes.

 

No kiddin', you know darling we mean every word.

HH x

[ho-hum]

The itinerary you describe sounds wonderful. (code translation: none). I will be happy to take delivery of your dresses and forward them to you. (code translation: What is Hum thinking? Doesn't he know dresses in that size look horrible? Try pantsuits instead.:eek:). Charlie, we need a management meeting at the TOY Bar. :D

 

Well, Jim, it just so happens that as of now we are somehow scheduled to be on board for a total of 30 days in 2017 (please don't tell Mrs. CTBjr) so it shouldn't be difficult to coordinate that meeting :) !

 

Well excuse Hum gentlemen !

Are you not forgetting someone ?

Or do you have an issue with cross dressing, LGBT people ?

Well really !

That ruddy Commander Courageous has a lot to answer to too !

Sorry Charlie, Hum cant keep calling you the name of Hum's heammaroid cream any longer (CTBJR1309).

Sorry for breaking your cover.

 

Again, it's at time like these, Hum thinks to himself about the possible new person thinking of a voyage on SD and so they come to this forum eventually and see and say to themselves "well this looks lije a popular forum, think I'll just take a looksie and then they read this !!!! "

If it were not for people like us, the ruddy ship would be FULL every ruddy week !

Hahaha

 

So ruddy funny !

By the way SD, and Hum knows you read this, send the ransom to Hum's Swiss bank account and Hum will stop.

 

The book's out next month ! But you can pre-order (just paying attention: well would you really expect any less ? No, of course not.

Edited August 8, 2016 by ho-hum

[ctbjr1309]

By the way old chum, "The Boss" has an autobiography out but Hum guesses you knew that.

 

Not yet. Next month....

 

But I'm pleased that you're paying attention.

[TrapperZimmy]

Every year in our country, we honour "the fallen" in various historic and current conflicts for the armed forces.

Why dont we have a day devoted to honouring those serving and who have served?

 

Here in the colonies, Ho, we have two holidays dedicated to the military. Memorial Day honors the fallen, except that it has become to be recognized as the beginning of summer and is more often a time of picnics and other assorted diversions. Veterans' Day (formerly Armistice Day) is celebrated on November 11, and in some parts it is even recognized on the eleventh hour. In recent years it has also recognized those who are currently in uniform. Fortunately, it is too cold in most parts of the US for picnics, so the holiday hasn't taken on a different character, although many businesses no longer give the day off because it is only two or three weeks before the four-day Thanksgiving weekend. Zimmy and I always fly the flag that day and buy poppies from one of the veterans' organizations.

 

What we should have is another holiday giving honor to our service men and women who have EARNED the Purple Heart, our oldest military medal for those wounded in combat. None of them had ever gone into battle wanting to win this medal.

[The A Train]

OK trivia buffs, here's two for U.

 

1) How many faces does Big Ben have? and,

 

2) What was the most popular paid tourist attraction in the U.K. in 2015?

[Jim Avery]

OK trivia buffs, here's two for U.

 

1) How many faces does Big Ben have? and,

 

2) What was the most popular paid tourist attraction in the U.K. in 2015?

 

I'll bite.

1) Big Ben has no face. The clock tower has 4 faces.:eek:

 

2) It is usually the British Museum........Or the Ho-Hum estate. Neck and neck each year.:D:D

[Jim Avery]

Ooops! You said "paid" attraction. Last time I went the Museum had no charge. Not sure if that is still true. I give up. Must be the great Hum Estate. Or the London Eye.....:D

[abenaki]

I blame myself...it all started with those damn green loafers....

[COCOYOTE]

Never blame yourself for being fashion forward, Abenaki.

[ho-hum]

I'm off again for a few days...it's starting to feel like a "Ho Hum" existence, off gallivanting on another adventure after a few days back at the homestead.

 

Down to Anglesey for a bit of yachting on the Menai Straits...fine folk, good beer and lashings of succulent easy drinking vino "isn't it all easy drinking?" I hear Mr Hum enquire. Well, it can get a little tricky when one tries to stand up after a convivial dinner and navigate out the door without coming into contact with any stray furniture/people or avoid breaking any ornaments with that flailing hand when gravity wins and a well fed and watered body starts to crash to the ground...but one must try to put their best foot forward...just look out for where the dog is before hand.

 

Well this reply will be here for you when you return old chum.

Yachting ehh ?

Chums, beer, "shootin the breeze", jokes, "puttin' the world to rights" ...... throw in eatin', a few nice things to look at (ahem........), nappy-poo's and there you have it !

 

You offer a most salutary lesson to the "bon viveur": dangers are all around whether arising from the bed, chaise langue and the dinner table and rarely while inclined or seated whilst reposing !

Hum has seen a litany of be-draggled, sweaty, skinny runts, pushing bicycles back onto the boat with strains, cuts, exhausted and all the while Hum’s exercise amounted to climbing the stairs (no lift for Hum; despite there not being one but that besides the point) to the TOYB and shifting his grande derriere off the bed and between stool, seat, Balinese bed, dining table, bar stool and back to bed.

Being un-active is quite active actually !

 

Well MACT, you really are a fount of knowledge.

That book "1000.........." does actually exist.

The author also wrote "Merde": a best seller.

Yes, it's all about our garlic breath, Gallic, miserable, always striking neighbours across La Manche.

Thanks for the tip.

 

Hope you will have or had had a "spiffing" time.

 

Oh during Hum's research on the book you recommended, Hum came across this one:

"An Utterly Impartial History of Britain: (or 2000 Years Of Upper Class Idiots In Charge)"

How dare they refer to us as idiots !

Didn't the impudent author ever ask himself why it's been 2000 years ?

No religious persecution needed.

No dictatorial control.

Superior minds, superior minds.

Equality is a delusion.

Each man and woman must offer their best in whatever they can offer both as personal expression and in the assistance of others whether it is mother or President of the US and all in between.

The world needs you (at your best).

The world created you.

Exceptin' Jim of course.

Fruit of the immaculate conception !

And not as some consider, from the cellars of a Transylvanian castle in the 1930's.

The patches on the side of his neck are not to cover removed bolt holes but they are for sea sickness.

Oh you thought he was a sailor and wouldn't suffer from sea sickness.

Ok, ok !

They are bolt holes.

Sorry "Jim" Averystein.

 

Just kiddin'. It's all jealousy. Think "Rhett Butler". A man's man whom the ladies adore. Great old Southern charm, courteous and quietly spoken. Utter charmer.

Darn !

There goes those few days at Rancho Jimbo !

He wont want anything to do with Hum now.

 

And who would be Scarlett ?

Come on, Blondie of course.

Yep she's a "handful" at times.

Oh lawdy, lawdy !

[ho-hum]

I'm off again for a few days...it's starting to feel like a "Ho Hum" existence, off gallivanting on another adventure after a few days back at the homestead.

 

Down to Anglesey for a bit of yachting on the Menai Straits...fine folk, good beer and lashings of succulent easy drinking vino "isn't it all easy drinking?" I hear Mr Hum enquire. Well, it can get a little tricky when one tries to stand up after a convivial dinner and navigate out the door without coming into contact with any stray furniture/people or avoid breaking any ornaments with that flailing hand when gravity wins and a well fed and watered body starts to crash to the ground...but one must try to put their best foot forward...just look out for where the dog is before hand.

 

Well this reply will be here for you when you return old chum.

Yachting ehh ?

Chums, beer, "shootin the breeze", jokes, "puttin' the world to rights" ...... throw in eatin', a few nice things to look at (ahem........), nappy-poo's and there you have it !

 

You offer a most salutary lesson to the "bon viveur": dangers are all around whether arising from the bed, chaise langue and the dinner table and rarely while inclined or seated whilst reposing !

Hum has seen a litany of be-draggled, sweaty, skinny runts, pushing bicycles back onto the boat with strains, cuts, exhausted and all the while Hum’s exercise amounted to climbing the stairs (no lift for Hum; despite there not being one but that besides the point) to the TOYB and shifting his grande derriere off the bed and between stool, seat, Balinese bed, dining table, bar stool and back to bed.

Being un-active is quite active actually !

 

Well MACT, you really are a fount of knowledge.

That book "1000.........." does actually exist.

The author also wrote "Merde": a best seller.

Yes, it's all about our garlic breath, Gallic, miserable, always striking neighbours across La Manche.

Thanks for the tip.

 

Hope you will have or had had a "spiffing" time.

 

Oh during Hum's research on the book you recommended, Hum came across this one:

"An Utterly Impartial History of Britain: (or 2000 Years Of Upper Class Idiots In Charge)"

How dare they refer to us as idiots !

Didn't the impudent author ever ask himself why it's been 2000 years ?

No religious persecution needed.

No ruthless, suppressing dictatorial control.

Superior minds and respect for their "betters".

Quite unlike the French and Russians, who had them either all decapitated or shot.

Barbarians: there's no point "soft soaping" the facts.

[Jim Avery]

 

 

Exceptin' Jim of course.

Fruit of the immaculate conception !

And not as some consider, from the cellars of a Transylvanian castle in the 1930's.

The patches on the side of his neck are not to cover removed bolt holes but they are for sea sickness.

Oh you thought he was a sailor and wouldn't suffer from sea sickness.

Ok, ok !

They are bolt holes.

Sorry "Jim" Averystein.

 

 

Just kiddin'. It's all jealousy. Think "Rhett Butler". A man's man whom the ladies adore. Great old Southern charm, courteous and quietly spoken. Utter charmer.

Darn !

There goes those few days at Rancho Jimbo !

He wont want anything to do with Hum now.

 

And who would be Scarlett ?

Come on, Blondie of course.

Yep she's a "handful" at times.

Oh lawdy, lawdy !

 

Frankenjim, if you please.

 

Blondie as Scarlett? Well that does explain a few things about you Hum. Scarlett wouldn't worry about you today.....She'll worry about that tomorrow.:D

Edited August 9, 2016 by Jim Avery

[ho-hum]

OK, so who peed in the pool ?

Have you seen the Olympic pool change colour to green ?

And they say the participants are drug free too !

Come on, pull the other one.

And it's not just one either.

Hum thinks they should all wear "incontinence pads"

Which is quite a funny thing, cos Hum can offer a special deal on 'em.

[Poppy1966]

Not me. Promise!

I passed my swimming life saving course in school a very very long time ago. Involved swimming to the bottom of a 4ft pool to retrieve a rubber brick and wearing my fathers pyjamas and knowing how to turn them into a buoyancy aid if in trouble. Didn't make it to Olympic level. However my swimming instructor was called 'Miss Watters'!! Hateful old bag. :)

[ho-hum]

Happy Sunday morning Hum,

 

Appreciate the reply, I was concerned you were deciding to forego travel and possibly looking for a position in the political arena. HA!

 

My comment about USA exit was not about emancipation..I love my Country. It was about the male non politician vs female "The Queen of Corruption". (He gave her a new name this week). My allegiance is with that Non Politician similar to your Brexit vote.

 

Enjoy your day, it is a lovely day here on the lake and after my morning cappuccino, will take the slalom ski out for a spin. xoxo

 

Dearest Contessa,

Hum adopted the word "emancipation" as an expression of the very same non-political approach you were supporting in your beloved country (and not as a desertion of your country).

Sorry about the awkward semantics and mis-understanding it caused.

But since Sunday, when you were sipping your capuccino before skiing, well events have moved on (or should that be descended beyond any possibility of reversal) meaning all the discussion is now frankly academic.

Can you hear the "fat lady singing" ?

Edited August 10, 2016 by ho-hum

[ho-hum]

Not me. Promise!

I passed my swimming life saving course in school a very very long time ago. Involved swimming to the bottom of a 4ft pool to retrieve a rubber brick and wearing my fathers pyjamas and knowing how to turn them into a buoyancy aid if in trouble. Didn't make it to Olympic level. However my swimming instructor was called 'Miss Watters'!! Hateful old bag. :)

 

Well thanks for that most entertaining contribuion Poppy (Hum thinks?)

Hahaha

 

Obviously you rewarded yourself with quite a few glasses of the Amontillado after weedkill spraying the drive.

Well you deserve it darling.

You did wear breathing protection ?

Maybe it's the fumes ?

 

"Hateful old bag"..hahahahaha

That's so funny !!!

Love it !

Edited August 10, 2016 by ho-hum

[abenaki]

That a Miss Watters would become a swimming instructess is absolutely delicious....

[Jim Avery]

That a Miss Watters would become a swimming instructess is absolutely delicious....

 

Almost as good as Mr. Face Man Happy Boy being the spokesperson for Wee Wee pads......:eek::D:D

[ho-hum]

Well that brought the perverts out Poppy !

No, not surprised at all really.

Yes, had suspicions for a long time.

One's a shoe feti****ist too you know.

How odd is that ?

Stars have appeared !

Edited August 11, 2016 by ho-hum

[ho-hum]

Some chums are saying that this particular forum has descended into foul language and "smutty" innuendo and has very little to do with SD.

Hum would object to this.

It BEGAN like that !

 

Hum does have his "Guest Comment Review" waiting to pist, if anyone is interested.

JES ?

Anyone ?

 

And if the Contessa is "passing by". Hum was not gloating.

Would never be like that ....well to you, anyways.

Edited August 11, 2016 by ho-hum