Dinning with others

[NMLady]

Having MTD and asking to share works great for us because we enjoy having dinner with others and can get along with anyone for one evening. The occasional "bad" tablemates make funny stories for later. :D

LuLu

 

That is our philosophy too. When we first started cruising there was only assigned dining. We were always seated with others and luckily never had a bad experience. We prefer anytime dining and always ask for a shared table. We have met some fascinating people that way. And the very few times that we had unsatisfactory table mates we knew it was a onetime experience with them.

[Rowan555]

Then a cruise might not be your best option. Consider Alaska (not a cruise, but a land trip), Iceland, or lots of other places where it's easy to get away from people.

 

I think that's a silly thing to say. We have taken 27 cruises, and we have different "agendas" on our cruise based on who we're with, the itinerary, and what's going on in life. Sometimes we enjoy meeting lots of new people, participating in activities, etc, and sometimes we want to just have alone time to relax and unwind. That doesn't mean we ignore people in the elevator or are rude to anyone - but we might prefer to dine alone, spend our time reading and napping on Serenity, etc, rather than making a dozen new friends and chatting up everyone in line with us for lunch. There are different ways to cruise - and someone who wants some quiet, relaxing alone time *can attain that on a cruise - it's not necessary to ship them off to Alaska or Iceland. @@

[ontheweb]

That is our philosophy too. When we first started cruising there was only assigned dining. We were always seated with others and luckily never had a bad experience. We prefer anytime dining and always ask for a shared table. We have met some fascinating people that way. And the very few times that we had unsatisfactory table mates we knew it was a onetime experience with them.

 

I agree with you, and have to question the posts that maintain that those who choose anytime dining do it because they do not want to be with people.

 

Although the time flexibility is the main selling point for me for anytime dining, the chance to meet different people each night is something I find to be a positive attribute of anytime dining. And, of course, it does also allow DW and I to dine with just each other on a night that we feel like doing that, possibly because we want dinner not to last as long.

[Loving My Life]

For all of my cruises with dh, we've had great table mates who have become life long friends. However, I cruised with my sister last May. Although we traveled together, we are both married and have children. Carnival seated us at a 4 top with 2 significantly older single men who were trolling for women, and they settled on us! It was so blatant, obnoxious, and outrageous that we decided to stay for the comedic value. We still talk and laugh about it all the time. It was hilarious and tolerable for the 3 nights we ate in the MD, but I would definitely ask for a new table assignment in the future. Despite this experience, I will continue to request table mates.

Edited September 8, 2014 by Loving My Life

[charmy98]

Sounds some what similar to an experience we had - and the last time! We were seated with an Asian couple that spoke broken English. The woman asked "how you get here?" I asked her what did she mean "how we get here?" She said "how you pay for trip?" Being the smart a$$ I said "we're janitors and we collect aluminum cans throughout the year to pay for this trip." She sat there with her jaw dropped and I thought DH was going to split his pants from laughing so hard. I got up and went to the maitre'd and asked to be moved, that this was not going to work out. He sat us at a table with 3 other couples. It was bearable, but after that we always asked for a table for 2.

 

A nicer reply would have been, we flew in from such and such a place or we drove from Florida and we booked our trip through the internet or Travel agent.

At least she was making an effort to be nice and strike up a conversation even if it was broken English. Sorry I didn't find your post very humorous at all. I just don't see the need to be outright rude to people just because they come from a different country than you. You could have just been polite during that meal and then request different seating for the future.

[sloopsailor]

A nicer reply would have been, we flew in from such and such a place or we drove from Florida and we booked our trip through the internet or Travel agent.

At least she was making an effort to be nice and strike up a conversation even if it was broken English. Sorry I didn't find your post very humorous at all. I just don't see the need to be outright rude to people just because they come from a different country than you. You could have just been polite during that meal and then request different seating for the future.

 

I agree. They were extremely rude. It supports what another poster said earlier - that the other people at their table might not have wanted to be around THEM! In their case, dining by themselves probably benefits the rest of the passengers more than it does them. ;)

Edited September 9, 2014 by sloopsailor

[Harry and Lucille]

My wife and I have migrated to a 2 top table with anytime dining. Some folks sitting around us may like to chat, some not. That's ok. One night, a table behind us had four couples cruising together. They were from Greece. The wives were embarrassed, however the guys were a real hoot and out to party. Had the whole area of the dining room laughing and singing along. You just never know how things will go. Every cruise is an experience and we just go with the roll and flow of the ship. Our glasses are always one half full (if the wine is good, that helps). Harry :cool:

[Rob the Cruiser]

I agree. They were extremely rude. It supports what another poster said earlier - that the other people at their table might not have wanted to be around THEM! In their case, dining by themselves probably benefits the rest of the passengers more than it does them. ;)

 

Quite the opposite. Broken English or not, asking someone how they paid for something is being rude. Perhaps the question in perfect English was meant to be "How did someone like you afford to be on this cruise?" How should someone respond to such an intrusive question?

[cbr663]

I think that's a silly thing to say. We have taken 27 cruises, and we have different "agendas" on our cruise based on who we're with, the itinerary, and what's going on in life. Sometimes we enjoy meeting lots of new people, participating in activities, etc, and sometimes we want to just have alone time to relax and unwind. That doesn't mean we ignore people in the elevator or are rude to anyone - but we might prefer to dine alone, spend our time reading and napping on Serenity, etc, rather than making a dozen new friends and chatting up everyone in line with us for lunch. There are different ways to cruise - and someone who wants some quiet, relaxing alone time *can attain that on a cruise - it's not necessary to ship them off to Alaska or Iceland. @@

 

I agree. My DW and I do not travel on cruise ships to meet new people and seek out new friends. We cruise to spend time together, relax, explore new locations, and to have fun. This does not mean that we are rude to anyone or that we ignore other passengers. It is just our preference, and it is okay if we have a different preference than others. Our preferences do not lessen our cruise experience nor does it make it "wrong" - it is just a different preference. Suggesting that we change our attitude, to stop fighting it, and to make the best of it is not only showing a lack of respect, but is very patronizing.

[sloopsailor]

Quite the opposite. Broken English or not, asking someone how they paid for something is being rude. Perhaps the question in perfect English was meant to be "How did someone like you afford to be on this cruise?" How should someone respond to such an intrusive question?

 

With patience, considering the language issues. Not everyone does as you have done and immediately jumps to the conclusion that they are being "intrusive". If the original poster can be believed, the other couple was having difficulty making themselves understood and could have been searching for the correct wording to ask a simple "why did you chose this cruise?", which is how I understood the first two questions. The third question could have been yet another attempt to ask that same question. And furthermore, I have difficulty believing that poster's version of the conversation because considering how insensitive and mean they were to the other couple, it is quite suspect.

 

It is always best to err on the side of patience and compassion in such a situation and not instantly assume the worst.

Edited September 10, 2014 by sloopsailor

[swedish weave]

Quite the opposite. Broken English or not, asking someone how they paid for something is being rude. Perhaps the question in perfect English was meant to be "How did someone like you afford to be on this cruise?" How should someone respond to such an intrusive question?

 

I would have told them it was none of their business.

 

Asking such a question in ANY LANGUAGE IS RUDE AND DESERVES A RUDE REPLY IN

 

RESPONSE !!!

 

The humorous reply they were given was polite and to the point. The "Monday morning quarterbacks" on this thread are just looking for ways to start disputes.

Edited September 10, 2014 by swedish weave

[swsfrail]

I would have told them it was none of their business.

 

Asking such a question in ANY LANGUAGE IS RUDE AND DESERVES A RUDE REPLY IN

 

RESPONSE !!!

 

The humorous reply they were given was polite and to the point. The "Monday morning quarterbacks" on this thread are just looking for ways to start disputes.

 

And yet another kneejerk response! I guess some of you have very little tolerance for anyone who may be different from you! There was NOTHING polite about that smart-aleck response to people with a language difficulty. Even if they spoke perfect English, the response was impolite. How ironic that a perception of rudeness was answered with even more rudeness. How absolutely childish.

 

You complain about "Monday morning quarterbacking". I in turn complain about intolerant, quick to judge, easy to offend types who have little interest in getting along with people who are different, who they don't like, or who they don't agree with. And there are some on these boards who are very predictable in that area.

Edited September 10, 2014 by swsfrail

[Rob the Cruiser]

And yet another kneejerk response! I guess some of you have very little tolerance for anyone who may be different from you! There was NOTHING polite about that smart-aleck response to people with a language difficulty. Even if they spoke perfect English, the response was impolite. How ironic that a perception of rudeness was answered with even more rudeness. How absolutely childish.

 

You complain about "Monday morning quarterbacking". I in turn complain about intolerant, quick to judge, easy to offend types who have little interest in getting along with people who are different, who they don't like, or who they don't agree with. And there are some on these boards who are very predictable in that area.

 

You may want to read your response. You call responding to rudeness with more rudeness as childish then you resort to name-calling? Now who is being rude?

[Dayenu]

If somebody would ask me how I paid for my cruise, I would happily explain that for 5 years we collected coins in large coca-cola bottles, and when 7 of them were filled, we took them to the cruise port to pay. Don't use bigger bottles as they don't accept anything over 50 pounds, just like on a flight.

 

:D

Edited September 10, 2014 by Dayenu

[fortinweb]

You may want to read your response. You call responding to rudeness with more rudeness as childish then you resort to name-calling? Now who is being rude?

 

I'm on sloopsailor's and swsfrail's sides on this. Defending rudeness is just as bad as the act of being rude in the first place.

 

And, swsfrail did not call anyone childish. She said that the ACT of returning rudeness with more rudeness is childish. If you believe that the comment was about a specific person, then it is you who is "name-calling" by making that connection.

 

It is disappointing that there are two of you who are defending those rude comments towards two confused people who were having a difficult time finding the correct words to communicate as an act of friendliness. I hope to god I never end up next to either of you. Neither of you are the kind of people I care to associate with. :rolleyes:

[swedish weave]

I hope to god I never end up next to you. Neither of you are the kind of people I care to associate with. :rolleyes:

 

The feeling is mutual. Not to worry --- I don't cruise on Celebrity !!!

Edited September 11, 2014 by swedish weave

[tip]

I agree. My DW and I do not travel on cruise ships to meet new people and seek out new friends. We cruise to spend time together, relax, explore new locations, and to have fun. This does not mean that we are rude to anyone or that we ignore other passengers. It is just our preference, and it is okay if we have a different preference than others. Our preferences do not lessen our cruise experience nor does it make it "wrong" - it is just a different preference. Suggesting that we change our attitude, to stop fighting it, and to make the best of it is not only showing a lack of respect, but is very patronizing.

 

Very well-said! I most certainly agree with the above.

[fortinweb]

The feeling is mutual. Not to worry --- I don't cruise on Celebrity !!!

 

I also cruise on Princess, Royal Caribbean and Disney. Hope you find this information helpful! :D

Edited September 11, 2014 by fortinweb

[charmy98]

Based on some of the comments on this thread, I must say that some of you need to consider that the other people at your table might not have wanted to be around you!

 

I have been traveling on ships since the days when you had no choice but to dine with strangers. In those days, there were no tables for two - most tables were long, banquet type tables. But, the people at these tables were only strangers for the first few minutes. Then, with the right attitude of everyone around the table - including mine - no one remained a stranger for long.

 

As with everything else in life, it is what YOU make of it. If you fight it or have a bad attitude about something, you will NEVER enjoy it. Because YOU won't let yourself!

 

I never shied away from meeting people. My long, wonderful life has been much enriched by the strangers who have come into it, some for a short time, and some for a lifetime. Each has brought a new perspective, a new thought, a new appreciation about something I never considered before. And I am forever grateful for their willingness to share their life experiences, because knowing them has made my life fuller.

 

It is all what you make of it.

 

I truly hope I get to be on the same cruise as yourself one day. I would love to meet you. You sound like a beautiful lady with lots of stories to tell.

[charmy98]

With patience, considering the language issues. Not everyone does as you have done and immediately jumps to the conclusion that they are being "intrusive". If the original poster can be believed, the other couple was having difficulty making themselves understood and could have been searching for the correct wording to ask a simple "why did you chose this cruise?", which is how I understood the first two questions. The third question could have been yet another attempt to ask that same question. And furthermore, I have difficulty believing that poster's version of the conversation because considering how insensitive and mean they were to the other couple, it is quite suspect.

 

It is always best to err on the side of patience and compassion in such a situation and not instantly assume the worst.

I so agree with you sloopsailor and if Rob the Cruiser had of read the original post he would have seen that the Asian couple did not ask "How did someone like you afford to be on this cruise". Anyway I will stand by what I said, the response from the original poster was rude and not funny it just showed their ignorance for another human being. Enough said on the subject. The horse has bolted as they say. To late to close the gate now.

As for sloopsailor, I hope we get to be on the same cruise one day, you sound like my kind of person :)

[Bookish Angel]

My Korean in-laws asked how much my husband (Korean) and I paid for our house. Likewise, some Chinese folks will ask those type of questions as well. I don't like those questions asked of me but I know longer consider them rude, just culturally different. If I am uncomfortable with a question, I say politely something like "I am uncomfortable with that question" or "my culture (Dutch, among others) does not discuss such private matters."

[carolmacey]

Please help me... My husband and I cruise often but have either traveled with family or requested a table for two. The one time we did not have a table for two we were on the Allure of the Seas with Royal, and IT WAS A NIGHTMARE to say the least!!!! On paper we would have been matched with the people they sat us with. It was a couple about our age and from the same city. They fought the whole dinner, talk about each others parents awful, and generally was not nice. Then made my husband and I feel uncomfortable about our food choices. We did not go back to the MDR we choose to eat at the speciality rest. for the rest of the cruise. Has anyone else experience anything like this? And if so what did you do? We sail on the Breeze next month...

 

We usually ask for a table of 4 or less. If we sit with someone difficult, we are only stuck with them one night. The next night we can ask for a table for 2. We like the anytime choice for time, obviously, but also gives us the choice to ask someone nice we meet to join us. Gives us the control and is less awkward than asking to switch tables with assigned seating.

[wwcruisers]

Whenever you're seated randomly with strangers, it's a roll of the dice -- sometime sevens, but occasionally it comes up snake-eyes. ;)

 

In our twelve years of cruising, we had exceptional luck with our seating assignments. We usually do second seating, and prefer smaller tables (six-tops). Some of our best cruising buddies are two couples that we were randomly seated with on Jewel of the Seas. That was almost ten years ago, and we still good friends, who occasionally manage to cruise together -- no small feat, since we're scattered all over the North American Continent! :cool:

 

We've only had one table where we immediately knew that we weren't 'clicking' with our table-mates. We politely excused ourselves before dessert, and went in search of the maitre'd -- who reassigned us to a very nice two-top, for the rest of the cruise.

[carolmacey]

On the Conquest several years ago our family of four was seated with another family of four, also from the New Orleans area. There was room for a third party at the large table, but a few seats were unoccupied. We had a nice time chatting with the other couple and talking about local issues, etc. That evening, a card was slipped under our door indicating our table assignment had been changed, and the next evening we found ourselves at a booth for four. We wondered what we'd done to offend the other family and assumed they'd requested the change. For the rest of the cruise, whenever we'd pass them on the ship they'd kind of glare at us then look away. It was exceedingly awkward. Finally, on the last day of the cruise, I approached them and said I hoped we hadn't offended them. Well, it turned out there was simply a large part of 12 guests who needed the bigger table, hence both of our families being moved - and both of us thought the whole week that the other had complained and asked to be moved.

 

The Matre'D should have spoken to all of you and explained. He could have offered to re-seat you together. BAD Matre'D, slap his hand!!!

[Rowan555]

The Matre'D should have spoken to all of you and explained. He could have offered to re-seat you together. BAD Matre'D, slap his hand!!!

 

That would have made me much happier! I hated thinking we'd offended someone.