To bring 6 month old or not??

[MDL1771]

After not taking a vacation at all last year, my DH and I booked a seven day with Princess for the end of April. My sister and her best friend will be joining us.

We have ample people to babysit our son while we are gone, but I am already having second thoughts about leaving him. I think we should take him with us (we will be 6 months at the time) but my DH is worried about the traveling to strange places with such a young child.

Even though I want to take him, I am concerned about all the stuff that babies require and whether any of us would really have that much fun with a 6 month old.

Help!!

[crusinmama06]

It sounds as if you need a vacation without the baby. ;) Usually, we tell people around here that YES it's possible to cruise with a baby. Many of us do it. But in this case, you have family at home to watch him. You have friends joining you on a cruise. Many don't have that kind of support system at home. :)

 

A cruise with the baby is a different kind of cruise.

[cb at sea]

Since he won't remember a thing about the trip, and it will affect your cruise enjoyment, I'd take someone up on the offer of babysitting!

While a family vacation is great, you're severely restricted on what you can and can't do with a small baby---and the additional packing they require.....

Go and have a wonderful "adult" trip--there's PLENTY of time to take your son with you as he ages!

[Karysa]

We cherish our time with our kids but also our alone time. Let him bond with other members of his family and enjoy some couple time because that is precious and important as well.

Karysa

[6rugrats]

Another vote to leave your child at home.

[SimplyAddicted]

I am for bringing him. (But maybe I'll change my mind after I cruise for the 1st time with my 11 mo. old daughter March 1st :p) I think I am in the minority, but I cannot even imagine being away from my daughter for one night and certainly not hundreds of miles away. I also have family that would be more than willing to watch her, but I would never enjoy myself knowing she wasn't right with me. (I have a hard enough time leaving my dogs - I cry when we drop them off and I call to check on them about three times a day!)

[rebeccalouise]

After not taking a vacation at all last year, my DH and I booked a seven day with Princess for the end of April. My sister and her best friend will be joining us.

We have ample people to babysit our son while we are gone, but I am already having second thoughts about leaving him. I think we should take him with us (we will be 6 months at the time) but my DH is worried about the traveling to strange places with such a young child.

Even though I want to take him, I am concerned about all the stuff that babies require and whether any of us would really have that much fun with a 6 month old.

Help!!

 

Leave the baby at home. Your sister and friend won't say anthing (maybe) but this changes the dynamic of the cruise. This wasm't planned as a family cruise- it was planned as an adult cruise and I don't think it would be polite to change it now. Your husband doesn't want the baby along from what you have said. So, stick with your original plan. The baby will be fine without you. I left my then 9 month old son at home rather than dragging him to Italy with me and he was fine.

[venusjems]

i am on the opposite side! Take him with you! i have a 5 month old that i will be taking with me in september right when he makes a year. Granted it wont be the same like when it was just us adults, but i couldnt bear to leave him home!! Of course we are taking the grandmom with us, so that she can help out and give us that alone time.

 

Then again my baby is very good (knock on wood) only cries when hungry.. goes to all his brothers football and basketball games and never makes a peep, goes to dinner, movies, shopping and never fusses..

 

And of course we are going into it, thinking it is a "family vacation", so if i cant go to the dining room and get lobster on formal night cause pumpkin wants to sleep, i cant get upset..

[rebeccalouise]

I think it is one thing if all the parties knew in advance that there would be a baby along. Changing plans after the fact is just plain rude.

 

Putting the needs of one person over the group isn't fair. I have two kids and we either do family oriended trips or adult oriented trips where my kids aren't welcome. Am I angry with the rest of the family- no. None of them have little kids and it isn't fair to the rest of the group- if they are trying to have an adult oriented vacation.

 

You agreed to go and it would be rude to throw a wrench into it just because of your separation anxiety. You'll both live and maybe hubby needs some alone time.

[boulders]

Leave the baby at home. Your relationship with your dh is more important than being mom 24/7/365.

[Conrycol]

Take him with you!

[beachchick]

None of us can truly answer this for you because it's such an individual decision. Sad to say that there have been threads over the years where "extreme" sides basically fight and call the other side "wrong" or "bad parents" or "selfish" or what have you. I think both sides are absolutely wrong for criticizing the choices of others: "You must bring your children everywhere you go at all times or you are a horrible parent" versus "You must leave your children at home sometimes or you are a horrible spouse/partner, etc." There is no right answer; just what's right for you.

 

I can understand not wanting to be away from your wonderful baby. I can also understand your husband and you wanting/needing time to remind yourselves that you are a couple as well as parents. Sometimes that can get lost, and it's very healthy for children to grow up knowing that their parents love them like crazy and would do almost anything for them, but that they also value and love each other.

 

In your current situation, you have the added issue of others traveling with you. In all honesty, I would not want to be "surprised" with a baby being added to the cruise at the last minute--not even my own brand new granddaughter. If you had originally planned to bring your son, then everyone would know what to expect and could make a choice of joining you or waiting for a different time. This is a real toughie because you may not be happy without him and others may not be happy if you change plans now.

 

Unfortunately, it is too late to cancel completely without paying a penalty. I would have suggested that you consider canceling because you and your husband have opposite opinions and preferences. It would be a shame if neither of you enjoyed the cruise. Can you work through your feelings about leaving your son at home? Think of how much your son will get out of bonding time with others who love him. Think of how much they will enjoy spending extended time with him. And try to think of the fact that your hubby has expressed a desire to have couples time. Sometimes new dads feel very left out when all new mom thinks about, talks about, and does 24/7 centers around the baby. It's natural and normal to be enraptured by your little one, but I urge you to consider your hubby's feelings and the expectations of the others traveling with you.

 

If you truly cannot bear to spend that much time away from your son, then you and your hubby need to have an in-depth discussion and consider whether it might be worth it to pay the penalties and cancel now (before the penalties get higher), rather than have a cruise where one or the other (or both) of you is unhappy.

 

I hope you are able to work things out, no matter what you decide, so that you and your husband are both satisfied.

 

beachchick

[Julienatul]

There is no right or wrong answer here. We have always taken our DD on cruises with us starting at 7 months. It is a great family vacation. That said, it is not as relaxing as pre-baby. You still have ALL the repsonsibility you have at home, feedings, diaper changes, calming a fussy baby and keeping them entertained. It does limit what you can do onboard. Your baby may want to nap just when you are ready for dinner or a show or a game being held at the same time. You mjst be ready to adapt your schedule to accomodate your baby. They also are not allowed in the casino. If you and the people you are traveling with are flexible with plans and open to changes in your schedule, you will have a good time. If you are expecting to do all the things you did pre-baby then it would be best to leave your baby with family. Alone time is good too. However, we did meet a couple on board who had a child they left at home the same age as ours and the wife would cry everyday. She did not enjoy herself being away and said she would never do it again. It ended up being a horrible cruise for them. You have to weigh what you want most out of your vacation, relaxing adult time without responsibilities or fun family time with responsibilities. Good luck, either way Im sure it will be a great cruise.