Why we don't go on "all gay cruises" anymore

[slackey26]

My partner and I are going on our first gay cruise (RSVP Hawaiin) in a couple of weeks. We've been on several straight cruises and had lots of fun and never had any problems. The problem with gay cruises for me are the price and "the floating bath house" conotation.

 

I'm sure we'll enjoy this one as well. Hell it's in Hawaii. Plus, doubt we'll be on the boat all that much. Still pretty nervous about it.

[Boytjie]

Really?! I didn't go to quite that extreme with the costume but lets just say there was glitter everywhere thanks to a good buddy of mine in the Jean Ann Ryan company! :)

 

Was this a gay cruise or a straight cruise?? The picture I'm referring to happened on a straight non-group cruise. ;)

 

It was an RSVP cruise, so all gay charter. The HM is straight but is a big tease ;) I heard he ended in the pool later that night. RSVP cruises give the staff a chance to let their hair down too since from certain levels up they are encouraged to join the parties. Even the wait staff serving drinks and bussing at the parties get into the fun - they'll have cameras at hand and ask whether they could have their pictures taken with the crazy passengers (they stores they must tell back hoem...). The gay crew members also get to experience being in the majority for a while, and some that were closeted have been known to fall out of it while we are onboard.

Edited October 15, 2010 by Boytjie

[COMBOY]

Well....I guess to each is own. I leave in two day on the Atlantis charter to Mexico. I did this cruise last year and have been on several other all-gay charters plus many main stream cruises and one gay group cruise to Alaska so I think I have a pretty good understanding about the concept. You know...it all about choice. I've never felt this "float bath house" concept. Sure...there's deck 13 late at night or the steam room. If this isn't your thing just stay away. All I know is I simply had the time of my life on these cruises. I've met so many nice guys and had a ship romance or two. Two year ago I went on a mainstream cruise with my older brother, his wife and his daughter (my niece) and I told myself NEVER AGAIN. It was the most boring cruise I've ever been on. Ton of kids, older folks, etc. Personally, I enjoy being around men. No, different if I want to go out to a bar...I will go to a gay bar because that's where I feel comfortable. I'm around straight people all week long so when I'm on vacation or on weekends I prefer to be around other gay people. Is that so wrong? Yes, gay cruise are much more expensive. It's simply the law of supply and demand along with the cost, liability and risk of the travel company to charter these ships plus they need to make a reasonable profit. I don't find the cost outrageous - pricey...yes. Worth it - definitely. Would all gay people enjoy the charters - maybe not. Again, it's all about choice.

[Boytjie]

My partner and I are going on our first gay cruise (RSVP Hawaiin) in a couple of weeks. We've been on several straight cruises and had lots of fun and never had any problems. The problem with gay cruises for me are the price and "the floating bath house" conotation.

 

I'm sure we'll enjoy this one as well. Hell it's in Hawaii. Plus, doubt we'll be on the boat all that much. Still pretty nervous about it.

 

Have you checked out the Roll Call thread here for that cruise? You'll get to meet some of us before getting on the ship and you'll see there is nothing to be scared about. It has been a fairly active thread and has lots of information. We will have a Cruise Critic Meet-and-Greet after boarding so come and join us. :)

 

Gay charters can be as bathhousy as you want it to be, or as sedate as you want it to be. I have been on a few since 1997 and have never seen cabin doors open like at a bathhouse. Someone has brought their mothers or sisters or girl friends along so it is not that bad. People are not lying naked by the pool all day and having sex everywhere. ;)

Edited October 15, 2010 by Boytjie

[eroller]

I have been on a few since 1997 and have never seen cabin doors open like at a bathhouse. Someone has brought their mothers or sisters or girl friends along so it is not that bad. People are not lying naked by the pool all day and having sex everywhere. ;)

 

 

 

Too bad you never experienced RSVP in 1996 on the JUBILEE! LOL

 

It's also the infamous cruise where Sandra Bernhard was booed off the stage and a glass thrown at the stage as well. She deserved it, as her act wasn't funny, sarcastic, or witty ... but hateful and offensive. RSVP sent out an apology letter on that one. I doubt she has ever been invited back.

 

On the more positive, one of the performers was the late, great Nell Carter. She was fantastic and will be missed.

 

One thing I loved about RSVP was the great entertainment (believe me watching Sandra Bernhard get booed off the stage was serious entertainment!). Also, on what other cruise do you see full-on glamorous drag on formal night in the dining room!! LOL Oh don't tell me, that doesn't happen anymore either?

 

Ernie

[COMBOY]

eroller...that's funny you should write about Sandra Bernhard. Several years ago I went on a Mexico RSVP and RuPaul was the guest entertainer. We had the second showing; however, we heard from the first seating that he was just awful. I guess many people walk out of his show. Well, I went and he wasn't all that bad. Not great; not good either. Well, I guess later in the cruise someone was talking to someone in the elevator about how awful Rupaul's performance was not realizing "he" was in the elevator without drag. Rupaul raced out of the elevator and has never ever done another gay cruise since...LOL

[CruisinMaterial]

It was an RSVP cruise, so all gay charter. The HM is straight but is a big tease ;) I heard he ended in the pool later that night. RSVP cruises give the staff a chance to let their hair down too since from certain levels up they are encouraged to join the parties. Even the wait staff serving drinks and bussing at the parties get into the fun - they'll have cameras at hand and ask whether they could have their pictures taken with the crazy passengers (they stores they must tell back hoem...). The gay crew members also get to experience being in the majority for a while, and some that were closeted have been known to fall out of it while we are onboard.

 

I figured it had to be a charter cruise but I knew Atlantis doesn't do underwear parties but I thought it might have been RSVP. Either way, my experience while a tad bit more sedate in the wardrobe department was just as fun. Captain Konstantinos Fafalios looked somewhat mortified when I first approached him for the picture but figured out who gave me the glitter (as that individual had also had some residual on him from the show) and smiled for a nice picture. I did see some crew that I knew on the Solstice that had left NCL at the White Party. It was nice to see them up there and I do know the crew does come out and party with us but usually away from the main dancefloor and up at the bar on the sun deck. The most senior person I saw attending that party was the ship's doctor. Got to have a pleasant conversation with her and got some statistics about the ship's first 13 cruises and norovirus outbreaks for a paper and presentation I was doing at school. :)

 

Loving this trip down memory lane! :D

[Boytjie]

Too bad you never experienced RSVP in 1996 on the JUBILEE! LOL

 

As Sister Helen Holy would say: "Well...."

 

These days there is a clothing optional deck on the warm weather cruises and at night it is known as D Deck. ;)

 

 

It's also the infamous cruise where Sandra Bernhard was booed off the stage and a glass thrown at the stage as well. She deserved it, as her act wasn't funny, sarcastic, or witty ... but hateful and offensive. RSVP sent out an apology letter on that one. I doubt she has ever been invited back.

 

Oh, I have heard about that incident!

 

 

Also, on what other cruise do you see full-on glamorous drag on formal night in the dining room!! LOL Oh don't tell me, that doesn't happen anymore either?

 

Oh, that still happens. :)

[MDDCFlyer]

My partner and I been on gay and straight cruises. There are really two different species, and one can say even different genus.

As other noted the gay cruise is completely different experience. You can make it whatever you like it to be - either be on the parties, or in the other entertainment on the ship. It always nice to come back to old friends like Rick and Carla (Atlantis) which we enjoy very much (and even stay in touch off the boat). The atmosphere is completely different on the ship. And did I mentioned: NO CHILDREN on board. I'd pay premium for that everyday. Yes some of the cruises have an overt sexual overtone; but no one is forcing anyone to participate. It is not for everyone - that is for sure - but nothing is.

I enjoyed the straight cruise as well, but for a different reasons. The destination, the relaxation, the fact that the ship goes to bed at 10PM can have its virtues at times. Of course, the prices are more reasonable, which is a consideration. My next upcoming straight 14 days cruise, which I paid double for as I'm going alone, for a Concierge class cabin, is almost as expensive as the 7 days upcoming Atlantis cruise in the lowest internal cabin. Yes, I enjoy Atlantis, but cannot afford to go as much as I can.

 

So - there is time and place for everything. You should try it at least once and make up your own mind.

[TX_Atlantis_Cruiser]

As you can tell by my member name, my partner and I only do Atlantis cruises as we consider them to be good value and have had the best vacations on these cruises. While we used to love Key West, the last few years we visited, the gay bars and restaurants were almost 50/50 gay and straight patrons for the most part. What we loved about the place was the gay vibe and eclectic atmosphere with leather guys, drag queens, and dancing boys and everything in between. That's why we've recently gravitated to the Atlantis cruises. They are all gay or gay-friendly including most of the crew (that's how they get more money) and most important of all to us NO KIDS! We have met folks from all walks of life and all ages and in the end, the makeup of the passengers mirrors other cruises except for the kids and the fact that it's all male. Yes, there really are midwestern housewives--they just have beards! As comboy said, I'm around straight people all the time and with an Atlantis cruise, I get to be in a world where being gay is the norm and straight people are uncomfortable. And as far as the continuing "bathhouse" drama--yes there is a place at the front of the ship where the lights are turned off at night and crewmembers stay away and if you're not into anonymous public sex, DON'T GO THERE! We're on the MR cruise with comboy in two days and the couple that is joining us from Houston has never been on a cruise and are both a bit older (one is 63) and they are acting like little kids going to Disneyland--probably not the same anticipation they would have for a straight cruise . . .

[Lifeboat Party]

My very first cruise was an Atlantis charter to the Caribbean. To say it was fun was an understatement: it was a mind blowing good time! To top it off my friend and I won the treasure hunt contest. The prize? A free Atlantis cruise in the Mediterranean the following summer (the gods were definitely smiling). After that it was a few more years before I took another cruise and due to cost I now stick to regular, mixed cruises. I don't enjoy being surrounded by noisy kids but I do like saving money. For those of you who have never sampled a gay cruise, try it, you might like it.

[eroller]

 

 

 

 

Oh, that still happens. :)

 

 

Good to hear! I'm sure an RSVP or Atlantis cruise will be in my future at some point. I wonder how different it will feel 15 years later, 15 year older (UGH!), and no longer single? Somehow I don't think I'll be doing as much frolicking the next time around. ;)

 

Ernie

[eroller]

And did I mentioned: NO CHILDREN on board. I'd pay premium for that everyday.

 

 

I agree this is reason alone that RSVP and Atlantis would be VERY appealing to me!

 

I'm pretty careful to select my cruises when school is in session, and off season to avoid kids, but I've noticed there are more and more kids it seems year round. Some cruise lines more than others. I've never had many kids on Cunard for example.

 

Speaking of kids, I never hear about R-Family Cruises. I really enjoyed the documentary filmed a few years ago when Rosie was on the first cruise I think. I just happened to see it the other day. I'm assuming the atmosphere is very different than the RSVP and Atlantis cruises. None the less it was wonderful to watch the documentary and see all the gay and lesbian families in such an inclusive atmosphere. Rosie and her partner and kids seemed so happy, but I understand they are no longer together. Too bad.

 

Ernie

[eroller]

eroller...that's funny you should write about Sandra Bernhard. Several years ago I went on a Mexico RSVP and RuPaul was the guest entertainer. We had the second showing; however, we heard from the first seating that he was just awful. I guess many people walk out of his show. Well, I went and he wasn't all that bad. Not great; not good either. Well, I guess later in the cruise someone was talking to someone in the elevator about how awful Rupaul's performance was not realizing "he" was in the elevator without drag. Rupaul raced out of the elevator and has never ever done another gay cruise since...LOL

 

 

Funny story! Interesting, I thought RuPaul would be a fantastic performer. Of course I thought Sandra would be as well and boy was I wrong about that! I guess you never can tell?

 

Ernie

[Gunther1]

Another point to consider:

 

I am a strong beleiver in the attitude that GLBT people need to be seen everywhere. We've been on both gay and mixed cruises. Both have advantages and disadvantages. Cost is a BIG factor in what we choose to take.

 

Having said that, I feel that it is important to have "us" be on regular cruises and to show PDA. We've NEVER had any problem with people staring at us while holding hands on the promonade deck or walking down a hall, having our pictures taken on prom night (as I call formal night), sitting at a table for two in our suits in the MDR, etc.

 

I belong to a fairly well-known gay chorus and as our director always reminds us when we do a out-of-town run (Seattle is pretty progressive),just our appearance in a small town does wonders in ways we might never see....we are changing attitudes by showing the rest of the world that we are pretty darn normal.

[sfgoguy]

Too bad you never experienced RSVP in 1996 on the JUBILEE! LOL

 

It's also the infamous cruise where Sandra Bernhard was booed off the stage and a glass thrown at the stage as well. She deserved it, as her act wasn't funny, sarcastic, or witty ... but hateful and offensive. RSVP sent out an apology letter on that one. I doubt she has ever been invited back.

 

On the more positive, one of the performers was the late, great Nell Carter. She was fantastic and will be missed.

 

One thing I loved about RSVP was the great entertainment (believe me watching Sandra Bernhard get booed off the stage was serious entertainment!). Also, on what other cruise do you see full-on glamorous drag on formal night in the dining room!! LOL Oh don't tell me, that doesn't happen anymore either?

 

Ernie

 

Ernie, you brought back memories of my last RSVP cruise - I saw the drink thrown on Ms. Bernhard (rightfully so, I thought) and still remember her disembarking the next day surrounded by "protective guards." :eek: To this day, I never watch her performances (and she was at the Castro Theatre just last weekend.)

 

I've been partial to Atlantis cruises lately, but am seriously considering RSVP's summer '11 Med cruise in July.

 

For those still questioning the value of an all-gay cruise (Atlantis, RSVP, AquaFest, etc.), go ahead and try one. If not, you'll always wonder about the "path not taken."

 

As for moi, I'm still trying to get around to a Pied Piper experience to see how I'd like the gay group vs. the all gay experience. Despite the cost differential, I doubt I'd take a regular cruise unless I was with a group of friends numbering enough to make our own party.

 

Whatever, happy cruising, guys.

[Boytjie]

Another point to consider:

 

I am a strong beleiver in the attitude that GLBT people need to be seen everywhere. We've been on both gay and mixed cruises. Both have advantages and disadvantages. Cost is a BIG factor in what we choose to take.

 

Having said that, I feel that it is important to have "us" be on regular cruises and to show PDA. We've NEVER had any problem with people staring at us while holding hands on the promonade deck or walking down a hall, having our pictures taken on prom night (as I call formal night), sitting at a table for two in our suits in the MDR, etc.

 

I belong to a fairly well-known gay chorus and as our director always reminds us when we do a out-of-town run (Seattle is pretty progressive),just our appearance in a small town does wonders in ways we might never see....we are changing attitudes by showing the rest of the world that we are pretty darn normal.

 

 

True. But even on a gay cruise we have an impact everywhere we go.

 

In February we were in Cuaracao and three of took a cab to go scuba diving. The driver was quick to 'warn' us that there was 'a gay cruise coming in today!'. We said yes, that would be us. :D I assume he expected the gays to be wearing dresses and not doing butch stuff like scuba diving. ;)

 

The year before in St. John a lady selling sarongs in a market under the trees told us 'they did not warn us that you were comong' and kept pleading with us to come back next year because 'you guys know how to shop!'

 

And those on other ships in port see us too - often commenting that they'd rather be on our ship as we seem like a fun bunch. And then there is the usual comment on excursions: 'what did you do with the women?!' and we yell back - 'there aren't any!'. Well, on RSVP cruises there are actually always a number of women on board and they are received well and enjoy themsleves.

Edited October 15, 2010 by Boytjie

[gayspirit]

I enjoyed some of the early RSVP cruises that I went on in the 80s and 90s (feeling dated as I say that)....provides some great stories like the time the ship ran out of liquor on the 2nd day of cruising--quite a scene.....all-gay are less appealing for now, but that might be a factor of age in late 50s...However, comfort and safety are the most important thing for my husband and I. We went on a Princess cruise to Alaska where the emcee couldn't deal with us as an non-traditional family in the game venue; it was publicly a little embarrassing (we were there with my parents). Then we went on a Carnival cruise (HUGE mistake) which was overtly and completely homophobic and we had nasty remarks made towards us by travellers, ignored by staff, and people who would not sit with us at the dinner table.

 

Question:

We are looking into a 14 to 24 day Mediterranean cruise in 2011....any suggestions for cruise lines that are gay-friendly but not exclusively gay?

How have folks experience Holland America or NCL? Both have departures that are appealing for us.

[Darrell6t]

There is no comparison between all-gay cruises and ordinary cruises. They are just so different. My partner and I do both. The all-gay ones are just so much fun, almost too much. And we don't dance all night or drink too much or have sex in the sauna. The passengers are just all so nice and attitude is seldom in view. The entertainment, including the hilarious versions of BINGO and the Newlywed game, is so wonderful. So much better than any ordinary cruise I have ever been on.

 

The regular cruises we take are to see some more interesting ports, or to take a break, or explore a new ship. And they are fun, and we meet some nice people. We don't pretend to be anything but a couple and have rarely run into any problems. The crew has never been a problem on any cruise. And we often meet some other gay people. But the whole atmosphere is so much less exciting than the all-gay cruises. If you have never taken one, you just don't know what you are missing.

[Darrell6t]

GaySpirit, We have had nothing but good experience on Holland America. The crew is always helpful and friendly. And they always seem to have a Friend of Dorothy or GLBT meeting. We have over 100 days on HAL, with the majority being on ordinary cruises, but some from the wonderful RSVP cruises. We leave for our first Aquafest group cruise in a few days. We are looking forward to seeing how that works out. About 250 people on a 2200 passenger ship.

Edited October 15, 2010 by Darrell6t

[mistereks]

I'm surprised no one has mentioned this yet, so I will.

 

One of the reasons I prefer conventional cruises is because it gives the straight folks a chance to meet more gay couples. If we shut ourselves off in an Atlantis/RSVP ghetto, they don't get to see how many of us there are -- and how much like them we actually are.

[BEAV]

Although my partner and I have never been on an all-gay cruise and are quite content on 'regular' sailings, we have two very dear friends who have been together for over 15 years who met on board a RSVP cruise to Alaska traveling as singles. Next year they are planning their 2nd RSVP cruise, this time together as a couple, to the Med, and we couldn't be happier for them. :)

[eroller]

Question:

We are looking into a 14 to 24 day Mediterranean cruise in 2011....any suggestions for cruise lines that are gay-friendly but not exclusively gay?

How have folks experience Holland America or NCL? Both have departures that are appealing for us.

 

 

I've sailed on some 80+ cruises on all the major lines and some not so major. Honestly they have all been pretty gay friendly. I do agree that Carnival is probably the least gay friendly, but I don't think it's any fault of the line but more so the passengers that frequent Carnival. Even so, I've never had any issues on any of the lines I have sailed, including Carnival.

 

For me personally, Cunard, Celebrity, and Princess are probably the most gay friendly. Not just because of the policies of the lines, but because in my experience they have carried the most gay passengers. Their LGBT gatherings have always had the most participants in my experience. Princess even has a staff member (usually gay) attend the first party to get things going, and complimentary champagne is served.

 

I think no matter what line you decide on you will have a good time. Med cruises are generally very port intensive with minimal sea days, so you might encounter less LGBT participation compared to some other itineraries. Just a thought.

 

Ernie

[Boytjie]

I'm surprised no one has mentioned this yet, so I will.

 

One of the reasons I prefer conventional cruises is because it gives the straight folks a chance to meet more gay couples. If we shut ourselves off in an Atlantis/RSVP ghetto, they don't get to see how many of us there are -- and how much like them we actually are.

 

I see your point but I am amongst straight folks most of the times and sometimes it is nice to get away from it all and not be the after-school special and having a fun vacation, which should be all about me and not them. :)

[gayspirit]

Has anyone gone on Road Scholar (used to be Elderhostel) cruises?