at the risk of being pathetic !

[cruzin w chris]

hi everyone, i am so up in the air about booking and cruising solo. now that i am divorced i feel the need to take a much needed vacation. i have a strong passion for cruising but i just dont want to be viewed as pathetic by anyone because i am solo. i know people say " who cares what others think " but with this being my first solo vacation i will be looking at others and if i get those kind of looks it may scar me:D. i would much rather not go it alone but i have not had a chance to put myself back into the dating pool yet. my marriage ended as a result of a cruise ( thats a story in itself ) but i still very much want to cruise. i guess i just need to bite the bullet and just book and go, live and learn. maybe it will be fantastic, i dont know. i am the shy type at first but i loosen up nicely pretty quick when it comes to meeting others. i need encouraging words to push me over the edge though because i am very nervous about doing this. chris p.s i am 46 yrs old if that makes any difference.

[patseacruiser]

Chris - do you have a friend that would share the room with you and meal time? I am perfectly happy by myself or with others and living in NYC many years ago alone you learn to adapt to go out to live and go out to eat alone. But you will have tablemates and the cruise lines are generally pretty good about matching cruisers to sit together. If you decide they are not for you once you meet them then eat in the buffet. I have never looked at anyone who was solo as pathetic. In fact, how do you even know most people are solo unless you wear a shirt that says I'm traveling alone. I go with my husband or friends and we are very rarely even together except at dinner time. I really wouldn't worry about getting strange looks from people. I have seen so much stranger than a man or woman alone. Go out and throw yourself back into life and have a wonderful cruise and make friends and meet people.

[BonnieVA]

Hmmm ... I'm no psychologist but it's not so simple in this case to say "just go". If your marriage ended because of a cruise you should seriously consider whether going on another might bring back stressful feelings again. That said, I understand your desire to cruise since I also love it so much. I guess you won't know unless you try it.

 

As for people looking at you funny or passing judgment, I really don't think that they do that. As a solo cruiser I've had MANY people tell me how brave they think I am or how impressed they are that I could do something like that alone. I've never gotten anything but respect for other passengers as well as crew. I've seen many other women cruising alone & I've seen men, too. The men were probably in their 50s & 60s. I was 42 & 43 when I cruised alone recently.

 

For me, cruising is so peaceful & enjoyable. It gives you lots of time for introspection. It's a GREAT way to vacation solo. You can be very sociable or you don't have to. You can drink (or not) & not worry about getting home safely, lol. I guess you should give it a shot!

[HowardK]

I tried the Jewel by myself and wasn't entirely fond of the experience but am going to try to Epic and I am much more optimistic about it since it accommodates solo travellers.

 

I think that is important as I found from going on past cruises with family that meeting people as soon as possible sets the tone for a positive experience.

[cruzin w chris]

Chris - do you have a friend that would share the room with you and meal time? I am perfectly happy by myself or with others and living in NYC many years ago alone you learn to adapt to go out to live and go out to eat alone. But you will have tablemates and the cruise lines are generally pretty good about matching cruisers to sit together. If you decide they are not for you once you meet them then eat in the buffet. I have never looked at anyone who was solo as pathetic. In fact, how do you even know most people are solo unless you wear a shirt that says I'm traveling alone. I go with my husband or friends and we are very rarely even together except at dinner time. I really wouldn't worry about getting strange looks from people. I have seen so much stranger than a man or woman alone. Go out and throw yourself back into life and have a wonderful cruise and make friends and meet people.

hi pat, i have asked several friends and family but really no interest. yeah pathetic is a little strong, maybe would feel more out of place i guess. thanks for your input :)

[cruzin w chris]

Hmmm ... I'm no psychologist but it's not so simple in this case to say "just go". If your marriage ended because of a cruise you should seriously consider whether going on another might bring back stressful feelings again. That said, I understand your desire to cruise since I also love it so much. I guess you won't know unless you try it.

 

As for people looking at you funny or passing judgment, I really don't think that they do that. As a solo cruiser I've had MANY people tell me how brave they think I am or how impressed they are that I could do something like that alone. I've never gotten anything but respect for other passengers as well as crew. I've seen many other women cruising alone & I've seen men, too. The men were probably in their 50s & 60s. I was 42 & 43 when I cruised alone recently.

 

For me, cruising is so peaceful & enjoyable. It gives you lots of time for introspection. It's a GREAT way to vacation solo. You can be very sociable or you don't have to. You can drink (or not) & not worry about getting home safely, lol. I guess you should give it a shot!

hi bonnie, yeah i am taking a chance that those feelings dont come back but i do still love cruising and i should take that chance. it will be a full year when i do go since the cruise from @%#&. so i should be good by then. thanks

[cruzin w chris]

I tried the Jewel by myself and wasn't entirely fond of the experience but am going to try to Epic and I am much more optimistic about it since it accommodates solo travellers.

 

I think that is important as I found from going on past cruises with family that meeting people as soon as possible sets the tone for a positive experience.

hey howard, yeah the epic is the one i had my sights on. chris

[Faith77]

At 60 I've been in this situation a few times in my life--going off on a tour or cruise after a relationship ends. Also, in recent years, I've travelled solo on tours and cruises over holidays so I get out of dodge during family time over the holidays.

 

My suggestion for a first cruise solo would be to do something port intensive and plan on doing shore excursions with the cruise line. I really like NY-NE/Canada and Alaska as examples of port busy cruises. I think, as someone new to travelling solo, you're going to need to experiment to see what works for you. Also, as you build on new experiences, I think you'll grow as a solo traveller and want to try new things.

 

I've changed as a solo cruiser over the last few years. I'm now more open to the larger ships, open seating/dining, and just going with the flow on a new itinerary (for me). I think its important for you to take this first step. Maybe do a short cruise (say 5 nights) if you're really concerned about being alone longer. Faith

[jjfromsd]

hi pat, i have asked several friends and family but really no interest. yeah pathetic is a little strong, maybe would feel more out of place i guess. thanks for your input :)

I have asked family to go as well, but we couldn't make our schedules work. I decided to go solo, because if I had to wait for someone, it would be way past forever before I'll ever get a chance to cruise. I do admit that I felt awkward on my first day, but those feelings went away after a few hours.

[LizG12]

i have a strong passion for cruising but i just dont want to be viewed as pathetic by anyone because i am solo.

 

if it helps...when I've cruised before, if I noticed someone alone, I would've figured that whoever they're traveling with is someplace else on the ship. Of course, if that someone is sitting alone at a table during the lunch buffet, I may be GLAD to see them, because it may be a place for me to sit down too :)

 

FWIW, I'm cruising alone for the first time later this summer too.

[patseacruiser]

Was on a cruise for 5 days in May with a friend. I never saw her at lunchtime because she was roaming around or I walked right past her in the solarium and didn't see her. I like to eat in MDR at lunch anyway so I just go there and they always seat me in groups with other people anyway. Lunchtime is just seating as many people at a table as fits so no big deal and got to meet new people every lunch time. Never felt strange.

[snowbird1]

I cruise all alone all the time and actually enjoy it. You can meet great people right here on CC on the boards for your particular cruise. I know many others (men and women) who travel single or solo. My ex wife introduced me to cruising but I didn't think twice about continuing my love for cruises without her in fact I have done even nicer ones on my own. Like you I do find it difficult to find friends to go, seems there is always a reason they can't or won't go. In fact, I have almost given up asking BUT I always meet great people onboard. For me it comes down to this, I can be on a cruise having a great time seeing places and making new friends or I can be sitting home doing the usual thing which might be sitting in the house not doing much. For me the only real draw back to cruising single or solo is the that dreaded Single Supplement.

 

Best of luck to you.

[TriciaEMTB]

i just dont want to be viewed as pathetic by anyone because i am solo.

 

I haven't been on a cruise yet. I am going on my first ever cruise, and it will be solo, in november. But I have done many other things by myself. I go to the movies , go to theme parks, etc..

 

I think you will find more people jealous that you aren't afraid to have fun by yourself. Many people miss out on things they want to do because they can't find someone to go along, and they're envious that you can throw that to the wind and have a good time without needing to tag along with someone else.

 

I'm personally really excited about going by myself. I've had people offer to come with me, but I honestly don't want them too... I'm looking forward to being able to enjoy my first cruise however I want without having to take other people's wants and needs into consideration. I can sleep when I'm tired, eat when I'm hungry, and go on whatever excursion tickles my fancy :-)

[natshala]

I'm headed on my third solo. My DH can't travel but he's always supportive since he knows how important travel is to me. I retired early so most of my friends either don't have the time available or the $. And, to be honest, there are a few with whom I'd rather not travel with or share a room.

 

So, although I admit there are times I feel a bit lonely when solo, mostly I feel content. :)I'm headed to the Norwegian Fjords next month and am planning a lot of tours and excursions where I know I'll meet folks and have a great time. In my former job, I traveled all over the world mostly alone. So I guess I got used to myself. I've vacationed in Paris solo many times and loved it. There is a great freedom and absolutely nothing to fear.

[madcat444]

Hi Chris.....will probably just reiterate what others have said but going solo on a cruise is great.

You can do what YOU want to do, when YOU want to do it without having to take anyone elses wishes or thoughts into consideration (think that makes me a bit selfish, which I will hold my hands up to :p )

I've been on a couple and am booked up for NCL Pearl in October, again solo. Being single and having travelled alone for a few years it doesn't phase me and yes, I'm sure people do occasionally take pity on me for "not being able to drum up a husband/boyfriend/friend etc to bring with me!" Also had the "oh, you're so brave" comments but those are partly due to I like to travel to the US/Caribbean and I live in Scotland so they perhaps see that as a mammoth accomplishment *LOL*

I'm already looking forward to my October cruise and also keeping an eye out for one after that be it end of this year or beginning of next.

Let us know what you book and have fun. :)

[travelnap]

hi everyone, i am so up in the air about booking and cruising solo. now that i am divorced i feel the need to take a much needed vacation. i have a strong passion for cruising but i just dont want to be viewed as pathetic by anyone because i am solo. i know people say " who cares what others think " but with this being my first solo vacation i will be looking at others and if i get those kind of looks it may scar me:D. i would much rather not go it alone but i have not had a chance to put myself back into the dating pool yet. my marriage ended as a result of a cruise ( thats a story in itself ) but i still very much want to cruise. i guess i just need to bite the bullet and just book and go, live and learn. maybe it will be fantastic, i dont know. i am the shy type at first but i loosen up nicely pretty quick when it comes to meeting others. i need encouraging words to push me over the edge though because i am very nervous about doing this. chris p.s i am 46 yrs old if that makes any difference.

Cruzin w Chris,

I have been doing solo cruises for some time and have loved every one of them. If you enjoy cruising I think you will enjoy continuing the cruising on a solo basis. I have done over a dozen of them solo and it is nice to be able to do what you want, when you want. As far as feeling out of place or anything like that, I would join the roll call for your cruise and you instantly have a bunch of people that you will meet and know around the ship. You may be surprised that there are a few more solos aboard than people think. I have traveled with some body else, and solo, and I prefer the solo as I get to spoil myself and don't have to worry about what we are going to do tomorrow. I only have to worry about what I am going to do tomorrow. I was in my late 30's when I did my first solo cruise and I am now on the back half of the 50's and although I don't "party" as much as I used to, I still enjoy the trip. Hope you have a great cruise if you decide to go.

[crzndeb]

I used to cruise with my daughters (single parent by choice), but they are grown and gone now. I have accomplished a lot in my life and if somebody thought I was pathetic for solo cruising, then I would think they were a little pitiful if they always had to have someone attached to them...LOL!

 

I am going on my 3rd solo (TA) in Oct. I LOVE cruising solo. I bring my Ipad, loaded with books, games, music, movies, and I can have my quiet time without having to entertain anybody else. I have a tendency to like MY time.

 

I can easily strike up a convo woth someone, but can easily escape when I can't get a word in edgewise. I'm not looking for a relationship, or a new friend. But, I have met some wonderful people, whom I consider friends now, that I have met from cruising.

 

Get on the Roll Call when you decide which cruise you want. You will find that after you meet people you have chatted with, that you will click with a few and will probably plan

cruises in the future. There will also be some that you may want to avoid, even after just chatting with them.

 

If you love cruising, then go on a cruise. The past is the past, and it's all about YOUR future. Don't hide away and cheat yourself out of a wonderful life.

[crusinpsychRN]

I don't think most people would think "pathetic". Usually it's "daring". I'm all over the ship as busy as I want to be and must put out an air of confidence. No one has ever said anything pathetic like.

[cruzin w chris]

hi again, thats what i love about cc you people are great. i think once i am booked i will get right on the roll call and start talking to people. right now i am thinking of the epic because of the studio rooms they have. i will just have to find a good one. like i said i am a bit shy but not like hide behind a wall shy just at first but i do quickly warm up . so yeah i am going to do it. i just need to get out there very early on in the cruise as opposed to day 4 or 5.

[BonnieVA]

like i said i am a bit shy but not like hide behind a wall shy just at first but i do quickly warm up . so yeah i am going to do it. i just need to get out there very early on in the cruise as opposed to day 4 or 5.

 

Ya know, I used to consider myself shy, too ... until I went on my 1st solo! Now I realize I am not shy at all. There's something about cruising that brings out the best in so many people. I think it's because everyone's having a great, relaxing vacation. I found myself easily engaging in conversations with strangers. What's also nice about solo cruising is that you run into the same people over & over again ... on the ship & often in port ... so it's like running into old friends, lol.

[madcat444]

like i said i am a bit shy but not like hide behind a wall shy just at first but i do quickly warm up . so yeah i am going to do it. i just need to get out there very early on in the cruise as opposed to day 4 or 5.

 

 

Hi Chris,

 

I think your attitude towards this is great....I'm a little bit shy at first too but find people see that as an endearing quality and prefer it to brashness and full-on "in your face" approach. I know I certainly prefer the former when meeting new people. :D

 

Fiona

[COMBOY]

hi everyone, i am so up in the air about booking and cruising solo. now that i am divorced i feel the need to take a much needed vacation. i have a strong passion for cruising but i just dont want to be viewed as pathetic by anyone because i am solo. i know people say " who cares what others think " but with this being my first solo vacation i will be looking at others and if i get those kind of looks it may scar me:D. i would much rather not go it alone but i have not had a chance to put myself back into the dating pool yet. my marriage ended as a result of a cruise ( thats a story in itself ) but i still very much want to cruise. i guess i just need to bite the bullet and just book and go, live and learn. maybe it will be fantastic, i dont know. i am the shy type at first but i loosen up nicely pretty quick when it comes to meeting others. i need encouraging words to push me over the edge though because i am very nervous about doing this. chris p.s i am 46 yrs old if that makes any difference.

 

I know that cruising solo has it's advantages and disadvantages (the comments & looks, etc), but let me give you some good advise. Just be prepare to deal with those rude comments. As a solo male cruiser I've been asked by many folks (at home or on the ship) as to "Why am I going alone, etc.?" as if I was out of my mind. I simply tell people I love to travel and cruise and I have no one to go with. I say it directly & straight forward in a nice way. Say it with a positive attitude. That shuts them up fast. Their comments are understandable, but very rude on the other hand. They say it as if there's something wrong with you. However, why I'm traveling alone is none of anyone's business. Period. Anyway... practice and be prepared. However, most people are very nice and understandable. Some folks simply don't understand this isn't Noah's Arc...going two by two..LOL. All I can say is go and be prepare to have a great time. Why be nervous....You've not having brain surgery, but a wonderful cruise vacation. What's the alternative...staying home and watching Love Boat reruns? :)

[LBinGA]

Chris, get on out there and do it!! If a "look" is the worst thing that happens to you, then you'll be just fine! :D

 

Three things:

1. I've not purposefully booked a cruise solo, however, when I went with my ex-husband he was sea sick the entire cruise so I virtually spent it alone. When in port, I went on excursions. I met fun people and had a great time and though I'm not shy in the least when you're with a group of people there is always someone willing to strike up a conversation. Or not. The thing is it's YOUR choice.

 

2. Before your cruise, take some ballroom dance lessons! Women LOVE a man who can dance, even if it's just a few steps. When on the cruise, if you ask a few ladies to dance, you will have your hands full of company! Actually, this advise goes for off the ship too. My SO & I are ballroom dancers. The women dancing always outnumber the men. Any new man coming in for lessons is a HOT commodity. Trust me on this, my friend! :D Do youself a favor and take a few dance lessons! You will not be sorry for it!

 

3. Have FUN. Whatever you do, have fun at it. Attitude is everything! If you are having fun on the ship, people will NOT see "solo dude cruising alone", what they will see is "dude with great attitude having super fun time" (by this I do NOT mean falling-down-drunk-time) and the next thought after that most certainly will be "how can I get in on that?"

 

Enjoy! and I do hope you book soon! It'll be something to look forward to!

[cantwait2cruize]

OMG....I'm sorry but what happened on your cruise that it ended your marrage.:eek: I can't imagine:confused:.

[Calico Jack Sparrow]

Chris:

My dad taught me to dance to my own drummer. If he felt like going to a museum or the library or even the movies, and no one felt like joining him he'd go alone.

 

With that in mind, I once got free passes to Great Adventure Amusement park. It was a one day only pass and I didn't know very many people. I ended up going by myself and had the best time. Did what i wanted; when I wanted; went on the roller coaster twice.

 

Do it. Could be the adventure of a lifetime. Saavy?!:D