DINING DISASTERS onboard ship...

[CGTNORMANDIE]

Everyone who cruises eventually experiences a dining disaster.  Here is your opportunity to recount some funny and some not so funny stories.

[rkacruiser]

During my first cruise, 1970 aboard Rotterdam V, when Silver Service was still being used, a humorous incident to observe, but not too funny for the woman that experienced it, occurred.  

 

Formal night, ladies with long gowns and a nicely attired lady at the table next to mine wearing a gown that had a large open back:  one of her Stewards lost control of the tray containing a meat with gravy/au jus.  The tray tipped and a quantity of the gravy/au jus went down her back.  Shock with a verbal outburst was her reaction--obviously.  There was a mad dash to her by the Maitre d' and the Table Captains!

[CGTNORMANDIE]

5 hours ago, rkacruiser said:

During my first cruise, 1970 aboard Rotterdam V, when Silver Service was still being used, a humorous incident to observe, but not too funny for the woman that experienced it, occurred.  

 

Formal night, ladies with long gowns and a nicely attired lady at the table next to mine wearing a gown that had a large open back:  one of her Stewards lost control of the tray containing a meat with gravy/au jus.  The tray tipped and a quantity of the gravy/au jus went down her back.  Shock with a verbal outburst was her reaction--obviously.  There was a mad dash to her by the Maitre d' and the Table Captains!

LOL...it happens.  I was on the Celebrity Horizon in 1998.  I ordered a nice bottle of Red at dinner.  The wine stewardess started to open it while laying it on its side.  Out came the cork and out came the wine...all over my cream white dinner jacket...LOL.  The poor stewardess was mortified.  I was laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair.  She made up for it though.  She came to our cabin and took the jacket out to be cleaned.  She was still blushing red with embarrassment when she returned the clean jacket.  I told her these things happen...not to worry.  

[MBP&O2/O]

Our Officers dining rooms had direct access to a serving galley. Obviously all sorts of catering bits and bats were stored in there.

Occasionally someone would have an accident and drop a plate which was heard in the dining room.

One Master I sailed with, upon hearing the tinkle of shattering crockery would pick up his bread plate and throw it over his shoulder loudly shouting ‘encore!’.

Not good in rough weather when the ships motion could be somewhat unpredictable and unsecured items had a life of their own 😀

[CGTNORMANDIE]

On 1/12/2021 at 7:56 AM, MBP&O2/O said:

Our Officers dining rooms had direct access to a serving galley. Obviously all sorts of catering bits and bats were stored in there.

Occasionally someone would have an accident and drop a plate which was heard in the dining room.

One Master I sailed with, upon hearing the tinkle of shattering crockery would pick up his bread plate and throw it over his shoulder loudly shouting ‘encore!’.

Not good in rough weather when the ships motion could be somewhat unpredictable and unsecured items had a life of their own 😀

Dining in rough weather...another fun topic for Dining Disasters At Sea.  When we were young we would rarely miss a meal at our assigned table.  DW was immune to sea sickness and I would take Bonine and be able to make it.  There were several times that we would see others at table getting greener as the meal progressed.  There was one time we were sitting with a young academic from GB.  We sat down to a meal that was rocking and rolling.  We were surprised when the lad ordered pea soup.  In fact we started to chuckle with each other.  It wasn’t long before he had to hurriedly leave the table.  I’m not sure how far he got before the projectile hurling began.  We didn’t see him back at table for the rest of the crossing.  That was a rough Westward crossing on the SS France.  I remember rough seas and a swimming pool with six foot waves...great fun.

[MBP&O2/O]

The most ‘interesting’ meal I had was lunch on Boxing Day 19xx .... suffice to say it was a long time ago 🥴

We were in the South Pacific and carrying aviation fuel around various islands.

In this case we were sailing almost due west. Traveling due west at 15 knots we would travel 360 nautical miles in one day which ensures the sun rises much later every day - unless we altered the clocks. Noon was getting later and, as Second Officer ( and in charge of the day to day navigation) I approached the captain and told him that we needed to 'flog the clocks' one hour on Christmas Eve night (i.e. 02:00 on Christmas Day). This wasn't a great problem but in this case we were also crossing the International Date Line - and we needed to advance a day as well.
My suggestion to combine the two on Christmas morning and thus  cancel Christmas Day was vetoed (some people have no sense of humour).

The side effects of this delay were that sunrise was after breakfast, noon was at a ridiculous time of almost 2:00pm, and the Chief Engineer was furious at that (goodness knows why?) but Christmas Day went ahead as norma - with an almost midnight sunset, but we were forced to cancel Boxing Day in its entirety ..... ergo no Boxing Day lunch per se. 😁. 

[CGTNORMANDIE]

The Birthday That Never Was...

DW and I were on the Celebrity Horizon cruising to Venezuela.  My wife’s birthday was coming up so I made it a point to make a plan with our waiter the night before.  Winston was a good waiter so I had no problem asking him for the usual birthday treatment with a cake and a rendition of Happy Birthday sung by some of the waiters.  Wellllll...we got through dinner and nothing was said or done.  I was rather surprised but I did not let on as my wife had no idea that I had planned anything.  As we left the table I commented privately to Winston saying, “I guess they ran out of birthday cake?”  The look on Winston’s face was priceless!  I was laughing all the way back to our room where I presented my wife with a beautiful piece of jewelry that I had picked up in Aruba.  No harm done.  Winston could not have been nicer at our next meal.

[rkacruiser]

A very minor dining disaster--better defined as a disappointment--and, in retrospect, a preview of the cruise ahead in some respects.

 

Lunch in the Tables of the World Restaurant sailing from Southampton on Queen Elizabeth 2:  I ordered Entrecote which was on the menu.  I was served beef liver.  When I told the waiter:  this is not what I ordered.  I was informed beef liver is what Entrecote was.  I like liver.  No issue there, but, truly, it was a preview of what was surely not the Cunard service that my friend and I expected on that crossing.  

[CGTNORMANDIE]

1 hour ago, rkacruiser said:

A very minor dining disaster--better defined as a disappointment--and, in retrospect, a preview of the cruise ahead in some respects.

 

Lunch in the Tables of the World Restaurant sailing from Southampton on Queen Elizabeth 2:  I ordered Entrecote which was on the menu.  I was served beef liver.  When I told the waiter:  this is not what I ordered.  I was informed beef liver is what Entrecote was.  I like liver.  No issue there, but, truly, it was a preview of what was surely not the Cunard service that my friend and I expected on that crossing.  

Lol...in 1975 we found out about the Cunard fall from grace with a succession of inept waiters.  We had two waiters that were so bad that dinner became comical.  Much of the time they were wearing more food than they were serving...LOL.

[rkacruiser]

22 hours ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

Lol...in 1975 we found out about the Cunard fall from grace with a succession of inept waiters.  We had two waiters that were so bad that dinner became comical.  Much of the time they were wearing more food than they were serving...LOL.

 

My crossing was in 1980.  So, the "fall from grace" had been taking place for awhile.  Labor issues aboard the ship is what I blamed my disappointing experience.  Was such taking place for some years before 1980?  

[CGTNORMANDIE]

59 minutes ago, rkacruiser said:

 

My crossing was in 1980.  So, the "fall from grace" had been taking place for awhile.  Labor issues aboard the ship is what I blamed my disappointing experience.  Was such taking place for some years before 1980?  

Yes...in 1975 we had waiters that were less than adequate.  Thank heavens we had a lively table and one of the diners from GB became a good close friend.  We are good friends to this day.  The service and food quality in the restaurant in 1975 was nowhere near what it had been in 1965.  Subsequent voyages proved to be even more disappointing.  Cunard went through some rough times during those years.  In 1978  I did have a nice talk with one of the dining room managers.  He told me about the labor problems they were having at that time.  I am hoping that we will be able to sail on QM2 in the not too distant future.  

[rkacruiser]

22 hours ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

I am hoping that we will be able to sail on QM2 in the not too distant future.  

 

I thought my dining experience aboard QM2 in the Britannia Restaurant was satisfactory for the most part.  The dinner menu had more limited choices than what I have experienced on HAL (but, my cruise was in the 2nd year that the ship had entered service, so changes may have happened).  Breakfast menus were the best.  Lunch was also very good, as I recall.  

 

Service:  The Wine Steward was the best.  She was guest friendly and knew her wines.  My table stewards did a very good job.  The negative--and it was a major one that I have posted about on CC--was an Assistant Maitre d' who oversaw my table that had a much higher opinion of himself in his job than was warranted.  Officious is what I have called him.  "Jerk" is what one of my table mates called him.  

[CGTNORMANDIE]

43 minutes ago, rkacruiser said:

 

I thought my dining experience aboard QM2 in the Britannia Restaurant was satisfactory for the most part.  The dinner menu had more limited choices than what I have experienced on HAL (but, my cruise was in the 2nd year that the ship had entered service, so changes may have happened).  Breakfast menus were the best.  Lunch was also very good, as I recall.  

 

Service:  The Wine Steward was the best.  She was guest friendly and knew her wines.  My table stewards did a very good job.  The negative--and it was a major one that I have posted about on CC--was an Assistant Maitre d' who oversaw my table that had a much higher opinion of himself in his job than was warranted.  Officious is what I have called him.  "Jerk" is what one of my table mates called him.  

Thanks RK.  I was just being hopeful for the future.  The truth is, if I ever get to cruise again, I will have my Return-To-Cruising Party on MSC in the YC.  I can do two weeks in the YC for the price of one week on QM2.  All of that with the guarantee of superior food, drink and service.  
 

I did have one slight dining disaster on MSC Divina.  I was at dinner and couldn’t decide on what to eat so I ordered a steak...done medium.  When the steak came it was a well done piece of shoe leather.  I couldn’t believe they would serve something that bad in the YC.  I was going to ask to see the Maitre D’ but then decided I wasn’t that hungry anyway.  Everything else was so perfect I thought that it would be unfair to load that burden on to the people who were trying to make everything nice.  It was the cook who was at fault and I didn’t want to start an argument where the cook takes it out on the waiters.  For once in my life I kept my mouth shut...LOL.  That was the only flaw in an entire week of dining beyond expectations in the YC.  
 

 

Edited January 19, 2021 by CGTNORMANDIE

[rkacruiser]

20 hours ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

I was just being hopeful for the future.  The truth is, if I ever get to cruise again, I will have my Return-To-Cruising Party on MSC in the YC.  I can do two weeks in the YC for the price of one week on QM2.  All of that with the guarantee of superior food, drink and service.  

 

As much as I enjoy HAL, if and when I cruise again, MSC in YC is on my radar.  If not MSC, then it's time to try Seabourn.

 

20 hours ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

 Everything else was so perfect 

 

Regarding dining/service perfection, it's interesting to read this post this afternoon.  Reading my journal for my world cruise for this date, I ordered Prime Rib, Yorkshire Pudding, etc., Medium Rare.  My beef arrived closer to Medium, which was OK.  But, there were two huge slices of beef.  I could not finish both.  I guess because "I had been cleaning my plate" previously, my Steward became very concerned about "is there something wrong?"  I recall I had some difficulty in convincing him that I was simply "FULL".  And, could not eat the rest of the Prime Rib.  On that cruise, my table mates left something to be desired at times, but our two Stewards, the Wine Steward, and the Table Captain provided excellent service.  

 

My journal entry for today did show that I still had "room" in the tummy for dessert, however.  

[CGTNORMANDIE]

1 hour ago, rkacruiser said:

 

As much as I enjoy HAL, if and when I cruise again, MSC in YC is on my radar.  If not MSC, then it's time to try Seabourn.

 

 

Regarding dining/service perfection, it's interesting to read this post this afternoon.  Reading my journal for my world cruise for this date, I ordered Prime Rib, Yorkshire Pudding, etc., Medium Rare.  My beef arrived closer to Medium, which was OK.  But, there were two huge slices of beef.  I could not finish both.  I guess because "I had been cleaning my plate" previously, my Steward became very concerned about "is there something wrong?"  I recall I had some difficulty in convincing him that I was simply "FULL".  And, could not eat the rest of the Prime Rib.  On that cruise, my table mates left something to be desired at times, but our two Stewards, the Wine Steward, and the Table Captain provided excellent service.  

 

My journal entry for today did show that I still had "room" in the tummy for dessert, however.  

 

YC:  I will be sure to send you an invitation when the opportunity presents itself.  If I ever get the chance to cruise again I will make it the biggest celebration ever mounted...and I have put together some great ones!

 

Nothing worse than being seated with disagreeable or boring dining companions.  We were on a voyage to South America and were seated with three other pax.  At the first dinner one of the pax had a cold and proceeded to cough all over us.  Needless to say we all came down with the cold and a ruined voyage resulted.  Let’s just call it...another dining disaster.  I will never put up with a disagreeable table mate again.  
 

On another cruise we had a table of six.  There was a couple from NY seated with our party.  They found another two couples they knew and decided to join them.  The husband came over to our table to apologize.  I thanked him profusely and told him to enjoy the cruise.  I thought that was a very nice gesture on his part.  Not every table parting is disagreeable.  

Edited January 19, 2021 by CGTNORMANDIE

[rkacruiser]

1 hour ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

Nothing worse than being seated with disagreeable

 

I am fairly certain that I have told my story of my world cruise table mates.  Maybe not on this particular Forum; do you remember?  Ought I do so again if not?

[CGTNORMANDIE]

3 minutes ago, rkacruiser said:

 

I am fairly certain that I have told my story of my world cruise table mates.  Maybe not on this particular Forum; do you remember?  Ought I do so again if not?

By all means...if you can’t vent here where else???  I have bored many people with my ship stories.  But here we have a forum with others who are equally “ship-daft”.  So no matter how many times you tell your story there will be new people who are visiting here.  They will read your story for the first time.

[rkacruiser]

On 1/19/2021 at 8:15 PM, CGTNORMANDIE said:

By all means...if you can’t vent here where else???  I have bored many people with my ship stories

 

Boring?  I think not!  

 

OK, I will re-tell my tale.  Not this evening, however.  The hour is growing late.  

 

Not negative, but I may be able to recall some other MDR table stories that some might prove interesting to some for future posts.  

[CGTNORMANDIE]

1 hour ago, rkacruiser said:

 

Boring?  I think not!  

 

OK, I will re-tell my tale.  Not this evening, however.  The hour is growing late.  

 

Not negative, but I may be able to recall some other MDR table stories that some might prove interesting to some for future posts.  

Shipboard tales are welcome here.

[rkacruiser]

Another MDR table story, but not negative and not a "dining disaster".

 

First night on Rotterdam sailing from Boston on a VOV cruise, I was seated at my requested round table for 6 on the upper deck with a lady.  4 seats remained vacant.  Location was perfect.  Service was perfect.  The woman was good company.  A very good dinner, which was for me wonderful after a day where I almost missed the cruise.  

 

As our dinner ended, the MDR Manager asked us if we would agree to be changed to a larger round table in the alcove to the right of the dining room entrance.  There were 2 vacant seats; others assigned to our table had changed their minds; the table could be used by another party of 6 guests.  Neither of us were "wild" about his proposal, but seeing where the table was, I agreed as did the lady.

 

When I left the dining room, I made a brief visit to that table, introducing myself and saying that I would be joining them the next evening.  They had not a clue as to what I was talking about.  

 

As it turned out, the table was a very diverse table with well traveled folks.  Our Stewards were excellent, the location was OK, except when I had to sit in a seat facing a bulkhead (we agreed to rotate seats); it was a dining experience that added to my memories of an excellent cruise on Rotterdam VI. 

 

 

[Lowiepete]

Hello Folks,

 

Having spent a bit of time as a 1st class waiter on board a few of the "old school" ships and hotels ashore, I think I'd been pretty lucky that there weren't too many disasters on my stations. In those days as a passenger your table was your table and your seat there fixed for the duration. That could be up to 103 days on a Great World Cruise!

 

However, there was one particular meal that I will never forget and I've described this in full on the 

>> February and March 1966 pages of the Caronia II Timeline <<

 

This isn't a shameless plug because the February page provides the introduction and background and the March page not only describes the incident but also the underlying attitudes of those long-lost days. Believe me, they're nothing like those of today!

 

It perhaps also shows that your own behaviour on board a ship is also under scrutiny whether you like it or not, though you don't have to be loud, or even fabulously wealthy to make your mark...

 

Regards,

Steve   

 

 

Edited January 23, 2021 by Lowiepete

[rkacruiser]

5 hours ago, Lowiepete said:

However, there was one particular meal that I will never forget and I've described this in full on the 

>> February and March 1966 pages of the Caronia II Timeline <<

 

What an interesting story!  

 

I have met some "entitled" ones on some of my cruises.  As a guest, such adds a bit of "spice" and "memory" for that particular voyage.

[CGTNORMANDIE]

Great story Steve...Mr. and Mrs. Handlebar...LOL.  You know the nouveau riche by the way they act.  Anyone with any class would have brushed it off.  

[Lowiepete]

Hello Folks,

 

While Caronia was in Belfast having her 1965 refit, I went to work on board the RMS Windsor Castle on the 6 week Cape Mail run. On the station next to me there was a deuce table with an elderly couple from Switzerland as its occupants. They travelled both ways with us and they never missed a single meal, breakfast, lunch or dinner, even during the extended stay in Cape Town on our way back.

 

While they spoke to their waiters in English, they spoke in French between themselves. One lunchtime I was watching the station while the waiters took a smoke-break and happened to overhear one of their conversations. I could barely believe my ears. After a few more of these furtive, but no longer accidental eavesdrops, I felt had to pass on what was being discussed.

 

Basically, no matter what the meal, there was always something "wrong" - oh the tea wasn't hot enough or the bacon was too salty. They were also pretty rude about one of their waiters who shall we say was "a bit camp". "Oooooh, right", he said as I related the goings-on, "I'm gonna fix them!" Heck, you're not going to dob me in are you? A quick shake of the head was assurance enough. 

 

So, the weeks blended, one into another, when I'm summoned to "Come and watch this..." It's the last meal of the voyage and the ship is not far from passing the Isle of Wight. I go and take up station, propping up the dumb-waiter as I often did, when, with a deep intake of breath this couple are treated to the full farewell speech: hope you enjoyed your trip; hope you enjoyed the food and the service etc. Once one of the pair had done his party-piece, his mate then took his place and delivered an equally impassioned entreaty, of course, wishing them a safe journey back to Switzerland.

 

Nothing untoward so far? What I've omitted from the story is that both speeches were delivered in phrase-perfect French! If only I could have taken a picture of their faces... What these guys had done was to persuade one of the Head Waiters in the other restaurant to coach them. You might have wondered about the warning placed in my previous post; just mind that nearly 60 years on this story is again being related.

 

Regards,

Steve

[Lowiepete]

2 hours ago, CGTNORMANDIE said:

Great story Steve...Mr. and Mrs. Handlebar...LOL.  You know the nouveau riche by the way they act.  Anyone with any class would have brushed it off.  

There is an adjunct to this story. Mr. and Mrs. H had travelled the World on a previous Caronia Cruise. Not long into my gathering of ephemera from the ship I happened upon a PaxList from this earlier cruise. Back in those days, women pax outnumbered the men by factors, they maybe still do. It seems that back then one or two were pretty determined in their "manhunts". Were these women always called "Cougars"?

 

Said PaxList had brief annotations beside almost every male passenger and not too few couples either. This previous lady owner did not mince her words! Beside one notable entry came the description of "Queer and Rich"; there were other quite disparaging remarks with few compliments, quite unbecoming really. Beside the names of our heroes above, she'd appended: "Loud"...

 

Should I disagree?  😉  

 

Regards,

Steve