Long-Ass Dining Review of Scarlet Lady (12/27/23)

[Alsmez]

My DH and I just returned from our virgin voyage on Virgin Voyages’ Scarlet Lady, the 6-night NYE cruise to Costa Maya, Roatan and Bimini. We have cruised Celebrity exclusively for the past 13 years since we got married, but have been curious about Virgin ever since the line debuted, especially given the no-kids policy and all of the buzz about VV’s food. My bestie from college and his husband sailed VV shortly after the post-COVID reopening and LOVED it, so we decided to take the plunge and sail with them this year to celebrate DH’s 50^th birthday (the rest of us are late 40s). I’ll share my general review in another thread, but as a certified foodie I wanted to devote this one exclusively to VV’s vaunted cuisine!

 

Our friends had already eaten in all of VV’s restaurants at least once, so between their opinions and the menus we reviewed online, we had a pretty good idea of what we were in for before booking. DH and I had no interest in Test Kitchen (having experienced high-end molecular gastronomy in NYC and elsewhere many times, we knew we would not be impressed), but one of our friends wanted to go, so we agreed knowing that we could always go get pizza later. We opted out of Gunbae after learning that we’d be sharing a table with strangers (DH HATES forced socialization) and that we wouldn’t be cooking our own food. Again, we live in NYC and have been to real-deal Korean BBQ joints many times, so no need. We ended up dining in all venues except Gunbae once for dinner, with Pink Agave getting a repeat, plus one brunch at Razzle Dazzle and two at the Wake. I’ve broken down my dining review by venue below and included pics when available to help tell the tale.

 

Before I dive in, a bit about me: I am an avid cook, occasional food writer, natural yeast baker, sausage maker, and chocolate/sugar art dabbler. We live in NYC, so we are privileged to be surrounded by some of the world’s finest restaurants and every cuisine and ingredient imaginable. I realize that taste is subjective, but ingredient quality and skill of preparation generally are not, so I will try to include both opinions and objective observations here. I know I have high standards, but if Virgin is going to position itself as an industry disruptor due (in part) to its revolutionary dining program, I feel they should be up to the task of meeting (or exceeding) them. And now, the review!

 

Pink Agave – Dinners 1 and 6

Pink Agave was our friends’ favorite on their previous cruise so we were happy to kick off our vacation with a guaranteed crowd pleaser. Our server advised us that with a party of four, we should let him bring us all of the small and medium plates to share for a first course, and then order large plates separately as mains, so that’s what we did. Most of these dishes were winners except for the chayote, which was simultaneously bland and spicy (admittedly, I find chayote to be watery and boring under the best of circumstances). Favorites were the aguachile, strips of fresh raw tuna in a bright lime and avocado dressing, and the papas con chorizo, although I thought the potatoes would have been better served as a side dish to the mains. Honestly, the way the menu is structured with small, medium and large categories is a little confusing, and I’m sure that’s why our server suggested ordering as we did. The chayote, esquites and papas con chorizo really function more like side dishes, whereas the guac, tuna and shrimp felt more like appetizers, and the chicken enchiladas (which were only okay – the chicken was underseasoned and the whole dish could have used a bit more sauce) seemed like they belonged with the mains.

 

Anyway, we moved onto duck, pork and steak for the mains. The steak was the CLEAR winner despite the beef itself being somewhat flavorless and poor quality (this would become a theme for beef in every venue) – the tangy escabeche sauce, salty cheese and rich ancho salsa balanced each other well and covered up the beef’s imperfections. The duck breast was nicely cooked (though the skin wasn’t crispy), but the shredded dark meat was dry and the mole and yam puree were very one-note (both smoky and sweet-ish, no contrast whatsoever). The shredded pork was also very dry and the accompanying tortillas were kind of rubbery (dipping into the tasty sour orange jus helped, but not enough).

 

Finished up with one of each dessert to share. The tamal de chocolate was a bold swing and a miss, IMO – I admired the creativity, and it was actually executed well in that it was not too sweet, had a good balance between masa and filling, and the masa was light and tender, but chocolate and cornmeal together is just a no for me. I liked it more than anyone else in my party, though! The milhojas filling was enjoyable, tart and creamy, but the pastry was a bit tough (probably had been sitting in contact with the cream for too long). Bread pudding was dry. Chocolate tacos were tasty enough but nothing special – the “shell” was a bit too hard/crunchy and the filling was just sweet and one-note.

 

On our second visit, we skipped the chayote and enchiladas, but our waitress talked us into trying the relleno vegano, which was another fail IMO. I am not a fan of mashed potatoes in general, but these were dry, oddly vinegary and particularly unappealing, despite a good dose of spice. Speaking of which, anything that claimed to be spicy on this ship WAS ACTUALLY spicy, which made this chile head a very happy camper – no need to add Tabasco! Anyway, we feasted on aguachile, guacamole, shrimp and esquites, then the whole table went for the steak for our mains with sides of papas con chorizo. Notably, we all ordered it cooked differently (ranging from rare to medium well) and each of us got exactly what we ordered – unusual and impressive for a cruise ship! For dessert we ordered one milhojas for the table and called it a night – the desserts weren't really impressive enough to warrant a repeat.

[Alsmez]

Test Kitchen – Dinner 2

We gambled and lost on our timing for this one – I was hoping that by booking early on in the cruise, we’d get Menu A (Mushroom, Egg, Scallops, Venison/Beef, Blue Cheese, Chocolate), but we ended up with Menu B (Corn, Salmon, Beets, Shrimp/Lamb, Asparagus, Strawberry). Meh. It was not lost on me that Menu A represents basically the only opportunity to get scallops or venison on the entire cruise, and I was already starting to get annoyed by VV’s not-so-subtle menu machinations that limit the use of expensive proteins. Anyway, I’m not the biggest fan of corn or beets, so I asked whether substitutions were available. The waiter offered up two vegan options to replace these two (vegetarian) courses, tofu and tomato. Yawn. But fine, whatever.

 

Overall, this meal was exactly what I anticipated – mediocre food masquerading as edgy haute cuisine. The corn course was just a way to serve bread and butter without calling it bread and butter – a buttery corn mousse molded to look like corn on the cob, served with a corn baguette. Inoffensive (actually, the bread was one of the better breads we had on the ship), but in no way interesting. The smoked tofu and pickles with “buttermilk” sauce I received instead was just a vegan version of the salmon course I received later, so that was kind of a dumb replacement. Oddly enough, I preferred the vegan version of the “buttermilk” sauce (it was richer and had much better mouthfeel, maybe a cashew base?), and it worked better with tofu than with salmon. However, the pickles were just weird, and the smoke under the bell trick has been passé since probably 1997.

 

They served me a tomato salad when everyone else got the salmon, and it was also pretty good once I removed the sugar wafer on top of it – probably the highlight of my meal even though it was just a nicely-dressed tomato salad. The salmon (which I got when everyone else got the beets) was lackluster due to the aforementioned buttermilk sauce, which lacked the viscosity required to cling to the meat and was oddly sweet. Also, pickles and smoke. *****. The salmon itself was fine, although not for those who don’t enjoy raw fish (they torched it on one side and left the other side raw). The beets were very thin, partially dehydrated slices wrapped around a creamy cashew-based filling, a lovely presentation that even I as a beet hater could tolerate and DH absolutely loved.

 

For the meat course, we were informed we could choose one or have both, so we decided to have both. The shrimp, which was simply described to us as “shrimp pasta,” was actually shrimp/fish ground up and extruded into the shape of pappardelle, garnished with a couple of shrimp and lightly roasted tomatoes, then doused in shrimp stock. So, effectively surimi with tomatoes. A VERY one-note dish given the layers of shrimp flavor with only underseasoned, partially raw tomatoes to cut through the sweet fishiness. I adore shrimp (and surimi), but this was just not good – the textures were all wrong and there was nothing to marry the seafood and tomato flavors. DH can only handle so much shellfish and passed his plate over to me after just one bite. I let him have most of my lamb in return – he got lucky, because it was the best dish of the night. Nothing creative, just a very nicely cooked (medium rare as ordered) double loin chop, served with some roasted vegetables and eggplant puree (deconstructed ratatouille).

 

On to the asparagus sorbet, which was actually an enjoyable and refreshing palate cleanser outside of the weird Jello cubes in the underlying cream, but should have been served earlier (maybe between shrimp and lamb, or between beet and meat course if only doing one meat). Strawberry dessert was just a bowlful of randomness – raw berries, a spongy marshmallow, a too-thick gelee, dollops of cream and wasabi-flavored nut granola. I’m all for experimentation, but nothing about this course worked. Overall, a very unsatisfying meal.

 

For drinks, I went with the cocktail pairing and the rest of the table did the wine pairing. Cocktails were mostly okay, although weak. One that leaned heavily on fennel and red vermouth was undrinkable. Wine was probably the better choice – the first red was the best wine I tasted on the ship – but the waiter was unable to clearly tell me the grape, producer or anything else about the wine other than that it was “similar to pinot noir.” Oy. Wine is clearly not a priority on this ship – they are all about pushing that Moët. I could have asked for the wine list to identify it, but by then I had learned that it was unlikely to be available elsewhere, and we were certainly NOT coming back to Test Kitchen, so why bother?

Edited January 8 by Alsmez
Typo

[Alsmez]

The Wake – Brunch 1, Dinner 3, Disembarkation Breakfast

Since our whole group loves a bottomless mimosa, sea days were for brunching! DH wasn’t super interested in the Razzle Dazzle brunch menu so we decided to try the Wake first, on our first sea day. We arrived at 12:15pm and discovered that they add two steak dishes to the regular brunch menu starting at noon, a hanger steak and I believe a NY strip. Even so, the brunch menu is pretty limited, especially if you want something that leans more traditionally “breakfast.” No pastries offered, either, which surprised me. Anyway, we all ordered the clam chowder to start, along with the two salads and the poached shrimp for the table. Clam chowder is light on actual clams, but still delicious, with a flavorful, creamy but not-too-thick soup enveloping a few chopped clams, some crispy fried shrimp bits and diced potatoes. The wedge salad was a solid preparation of this classic, but the fennel salad was TERRIBLE – mostly spinach and a few paper-thin shreds of fennel in a watery, flavorless dressing. Pecorino was practically invisible and could not be detected in the flavor (in general, cheese was not featured on this ship and was usually only present in very small quantities even when listed on the menu as a major component of a dish). Shrimp were fine – tender and nicely poached – but mired in a too-sweet cocktail sauce.

 

We moved onto mains – steak and eggs from the regular menu for two of us, the special hanger steak and the pork belly benedict. Mediocre to poor all around. The regular steaks were awful – tough, low quality meat with that briny chemical flavor you find at cheap AYCE steak buffets like Golden Corral. The hanger steak was better, but only marginally so. At least the accompanying fries were good! The pork belly benny was awful, with greasy, tough bits of overcooked, breaded and deep-fried pork belly under a bland bone marrow hollandaise, riding atop one of the worst English muffins I have ever encountered (it had no nooks and crannies – how is that even possible?). Just bad.

 

We ordered dessert hoping for redemption, but none came – the crepe cake was tough (although the strawberry rhubarb compote was very nice, perfect balance of tart and sweet – would have been great with a good runny Camembert!) and the apple tatin was offensively sweet and overspiced with clove.

 

 It wasn’t terribly busy, but service was somewhat slow throughout, with a noticeable lag when it came to drink refills. Fortunately only two of us had opted for bottomless due to a bit of overindulgence the previous evening, so no great loss. The meal did not inspire great confidence in our upcoming dinner, however!

 

We returned a day later for dinner following a better brunch at Razzle Dazzle (more about that later). Dinner was hopping but the service was very good, so no idea what was going on at lunch (other than a reluctance to keep the champagne flowing). We avoided things we had tried at lunch, and ended up with the hamachi crudo, bone marrow and shrimp and grits (from the mains menu) for starters. We also enjoyed the Parker House rolls, which were less rich/buttery than a traditional PH roll but still one of the better breads we had on the ship. The hamachi was fresh and tasty enough but less interesting than I hoped given the description – I love rhubarb but I’m pretty sure the three little cubes of vegetation atop my fish were only rhubarb-colored. Bone marrow was prepared competently but served with greasy Texas toast and an oil-based salsa verde, making the whole dish almost inedibly rich. BALANCE, people! Why is this so hard to understand? I enjoyed the shrimp and grits, although the tomato sauce was a bit thick and overwhelmed the other flavors (what bacon and capers?). The grits were tender and fluffy as opposed to creamy, as I prefer for this dish.

 

For mains, two lambs, a hanger steak and a salt-baked dorade, or two winners and two losers. Lamb on this ship was consistently good quality and always seasoned well and cooked correctly – can’t ask for more than that! I asked for a side of the tarragon salsa verde instead of the recommended mint jelly and it was the perfect accompaniment, despite having little to no tarragon flavor (plenty of fresh parsley, however). Loved the head of roasted garlic that came with it, too. DH got the hanger steak and found it barely passable, like all beef on the ship, though the garlic and salsa verde helped there as well. The fish, on the other hand, was awful. Dry as a bone, overcooked beyond salvation. My friend who ordered it was too nice to say anything, but ate very little of it and filled up on sides instead. The waitress insisted on bringing all of them, and all were really quite enjoyable. The creamed spinach was whole leaf rather than puree, giving it a nice toothsome texture.

 

We finished up with the lemon cheesecake, an absolutely adorable presentation that unfortunately did not taste as good as it looked (and was served room temperature, which is just wrong for a cheesecake – it would have been much better chilled), and the Wake, the restaurant’s signature chocolate dessert. It was among the better desserts we had but not spectacular, just a simple (but richly chocolaty and beautifully smooth) mousse in a dry shortbread crust, embellished with some caramel cream and a few candied hazelnuts.

 

Conclusion – dinner at the Wake is better than brunch, but not really that interesting in and of itself. Totally skippable if you are so inclined. We had a second brunch planned here for another sea day but canceled. Our final meal here was disembarkation day breakfast, which was about the same as our brunch, minus mimosas and plus (terrible) coffee. All of us would have been happier with the Galley, but wanted to avoid crowds.

[Alsmez]

Extra Virgin – Dinner 4

Having eaten plenty of mediocre Italian at cruise ships’ obligatory, wannabe-upscale Italian restaurants, I didn’t have particularly high expectations for Extra Virgin. My first impressions of the restaurant did nothing to sway me – somehow, formica-topped tables, caned seat backs and a 70s terra cotta and sage color palette don’t scream “authentic Italian cuisine.” The restaurant looks like a roadside HoJo, ffs. However, the food itself proved better than I hoped, and ended up being one of my favorite dinners on the ship. We started with a small service issue – none of us wanted the charcuterie platter and tried instead to order appetizers to start. The server informed us that we couldn’t do that, but didn’t adequately explain whether we just needed to wait a moment to order or were required to accept the charcuterie to pass into the next stage of the ordering process. Weird and confusing. She eventually just took our drink orders and left, then returned and allowed us to order appetizers (no charcuterie required). Anyway, we continued our tradition of ordering most of the appetizers to share, with the tender, succulent meatballs being the clear winner. Chicken liver pate was ultra smooth but a bit light on liver flavor, and didn’t need the drizzle of balsamic vinegar that floated on top. Calamari were average, a little rubbery and greasy. As the lone artichoke fan at the table, I had the crispy artichoke mostly to myself and I was not mad about it – it was excellent, a simple prep but perfectly cooked and seasoned. Everyone else loved the ribollita (which I will admit was delicious and comforting if a bit lacking in beans). Carpaccio was prepared competently, but like all beef on the ship, the meat itself was relatively flavorless. They also brought us a basket of too-dense, bland focaccia (yet another bread fail), which got eaten nonetheless.

 

Next up, pasta! We opted for spaghetti alle vongole, oxtail agnolotti, pappardelle al ragu and bucatini alla carbonara. The bucatini was an absolute travesty, with the pasta cooked practically to mush and drenched in a grainy sauce that tasted strongly of powdered egg. Horrendous. Fortunately, the other three dishes were much better prepared, with al dente pasta and proper saucing. My spaghetti was the clear winner, with just the right amount of a bright and clean-tasting sauce and tender clams. The agnolotti were delicious but very rich and heavy on the anise flavor, so we each ate just a bite or two (this dish works perfectly for sharing since you can easily snag the agnolotti individually with a fork). Ragu was too tomato-y and not meaty enough to be a proper Bolognese, but was delicious in and of itself.

 

We were a bit full for secondi at this point, but powered through to sample the chicken and braised pork cheeks. Both very nice. The pork was ultra tender and succulent and the Israeli couscous underneath was lovely, although a bit unnecessary as we’d already had our pasta courses. Brown sauce somewhat bland. Chicken was nicely cooked and accompanying piccata sauce silky and bright. Loved the gorgeous blue plate it was served on, too!

 

For dessert, affogatos all around and the chestnut castagnaccio, just because it sounded interesting. It was as beautiful as the Wake’s lemon cheesecake, but unfortunately just as disappointing to eat – gummy texture and lacking chestnut flavor, with an incongruent apple filling and stale meringues to garnish. The affogato cart is a silly affectation, but the ice cream (particularly the whiskey crema) was very good (smoother and much more flavorful than what we tried at Lick Me), so no complaints!

[Alsmez]

Razzle Dazzle – Brunch 2, Dinner 5

After our dismal brunch at the Wake, we switched our next brunch rezzie to Razzle Dazzle and hoped for the best. In sharp contrast to the Wake, RD offers many more breakfast-y options than lunch-y stuff, with an annoying emphasis on vegetarian dishes and fake meat. Also in contrast to the Wake, service was fantastic here, and the bottomless mimosas flowed freely! The hibiscus-tinged Yaaaaaaaas Queen was a great addition to the bottomless menu. We started with drinks and a nice selection of pastries (apple cruffin and jalapeno croissant, both decent if a little dry) and got down to the business of ordering.

 

That’s where things got a little harry. DH is a devoted protein eater early in the day and wants nothing to do with tofu cream, kimchi hash, acai bowls, juice smoothies, veganaise or any type of Impossible non-meat. And quite honestly, the rest of us really didn’t either. Why does VV hate pork sausage so much? Even in the Galley they push the chicken stuff HARD. But I digress. We opted to split some avocado toast and mushroom tartare (more out of curiosity than anything else), then the boys went for the chicken sandwich and I for the frittata. Sides of bacon for the table. Despite looking like dog food, the mushroom tartare was actually OUTSTANDING – one of my favorite dishes of the cruise. Tangy, earthy, herby, yum. Would have been amazing on a roast beef and swiss sandwich. Avocado toast was underseasoned and served on yet another crappy piece of bread. The chicken sandwich had potential but was poorly executed – the chicken itself was good, but the pieces were small and fell out of the bulky bun if you tried to eat it like an actual sandwich. Beet aioli had little beet flavor and added nothing but its neon pink color. Finally, the bun was too thick, doughy and flavorless. Like so many things on VV, style over substance – Instagrammable but literally and figuratively tasteless. My frittata was edible, but a big letdown after that wonderful mushroom tartare (there was like one mushroom in it). Bacon was good but VERY sweet - they really should indicate on the menu that the “smoked” bacon is also candied.

 

None of the boys ate the buns on their sandwiches, so of course they felt they needed dessert to compensate. One Razzle Cake to split, please. I’m not that into milk chocolate so I wasn’t super impressed with this, but they all loved it – and it was admittedly pretty good for a milk chocolate dessert. It improved as it came up to room temp, too – the ganache was almost solid when cold but became a bit more fudge-like and started releasing its malty, caramelly undertones as it warmed.

 

Our RD dinner was the night after our brunch and DH was ready to cancel and eat pizza. I convinced him to give it one more shot by promising pork belly. 😊 He ended up being VERY glad I insisted, because he had his favorite meal of the entire cruise (lesson learned, always listen to your foodie wife). It was New Year’s Eve, so they were offering a couple of specials in addition to the regular dinner menu – a crab cake appetizer and a roasted pork loin. The regular menu had quite a few interesting dishes, though, so we shared a couple of crab cakes, tuna tartare, mushroom carpaccio, pork belly and chicken wings. The only standouts were the tuna and pork belly, IMO – the crab cakes were mushy, the wings limp with chewy, underdone skin, and the mushroom carpaccio was actually mostly a watercress salad with just a few papery slivers of mushroom underneath. Like most of the raw tuna preparations we enjoyed on the ship, RD’s was fresh and delicious, highlighted by crunchy radishes and a creamy basil sauce. The pork belly was also fabulous, tender and crisped to perfection. The unique crunch of kohlrabi was the ideal counterpoint and the creamy dressing married all of the flavors gorgeously. It was so good, we had to order a second serving!  

 

Mains were also a mixed bag, but they knocked it out of the park with my DH’s chosen dish, the lamb shank. WOW. Super tender and flavorful meat on top of an OUTRAGEOUSLY cheesy, silky taleggio and potato puree. Do not miss this dish. I chose the leek mafaldine, which arrived beautifully al dente. Very interesting combination of flavors and textures with the sweet, velvety leeks playing off the ruffly pasta, crunchy hazelnuts and sharp cheese. It was also VERY rich – a few bites was enough to satisfy. Our friends went with the pork loin special (overcooked, dry and boring) and the “secret” burger, which I had been looking forward to trying. What a letdown. It was AWFUL – it arrived DRENCHED in a melted mess of the most horrifically cheap-tasting, pungent blue cheese I have ever encountered. It obliterated any flavor the meat may have had, but not the texture, which was dry and grainy. The bun could have been the greatest thing since sliced bread or complete garbage, no idea, because all you could taste was that hideous cheese. And I LOVE stinky blue cheese. Stilton, St. Agur, gorgonzola picante, you name it, I love it. This was not that. This was wrong. Fortunately we had ordered the (delicious, crispy and tender!) hot cauliflower to share, so my friend filled up on that and helped me with my pasta, and left the burger to rot.

 

We sugared up for the evening’s festivities with the apple cake, brown sugar pears and dark s’mores for dessert. No real hits here. The pear “funnel cake” was actually a couple of undercooked sheets of phyllo dough, crumpled on top of bland pears and yogurt. Meh. Apple cake was a cute but forgettable napoleon, but at least the cinnamon ice cream was good. Also, if you’re keeping track, this was the 6^th or 7^th dessert we had involving apples. Could it be because apples are, pound for pound, the cheapest fruit you can buy? Hm. The s’more was forgettable too. Or I was drunk. Or both. It was NYE, give me a break, okay?

Edited January 8 by Alsmez
Typo

[Alsmez]

Other Venues: The Galley, Dock House, Pizza Place, Grounds Club, Beach Club, Social Club

 

The Galley: This was a point of contention between DH and me as we were planning this trip – he LOVES a buffet, especially at breakfast, and was not particularly interested in the limited options offered by the Galley. We eat relatively low-carb at home and he likes to stick to protein in the morning, especially if he plans to lift weights afterwards. Outside of breakfast standards (eggs, sausage, bacon), the Galley offers very little in the way of low-carb food at any meal. I’m a more adventurous eater and was thrilled to have the opportunity to eat ramen or tacos for breakfast, but even for me, the non-rotating menu did seem a bit limiting – and became even more so when I tried the food. The spicy ramen was delicious (neither the broth nor noodles were up to restaurant standards, but it was several steps up from even high-quality packaged ramen and the soy-marinated jammy egg and chashu pork were both on point), but nearly everything else I tried over the week was mediocre or worse. The maki rolls in the sushi bento boxes were awful – mushy, too-sweet rice with skimpy, flavorless fillings. The innards of the pastrami panino were okay, but the “rye” bread was terrible, bland and dry. Lunch tacos al pastor were a joke – three tiny chunks of pork and some raw onions in a rubbery, cold tortilla, no salsa or anything else to bring the dish together. (See top two pics below - the rest are from the Beach Club.) Diner and Dash did a good job with eggs to order, but toast/potatoes/etc. were pretty lackluster. Also, the half-table service, half-walk up order system really does not serve anyone well, and it’s incredibly annoying when one half of your party gets their food 20 minutes before the other half. I think the Galley concept has promise, but VV needs to find a way to increase selection, improve quality and eliminate service issues or this could easily alienate guests over time.

 

Dock House: Loved this venue overall – it quickly became our favorite public outdoor area on the ship. Snacks were delicious and a welcome change from the Galley. I particularly loved the octopus and sunchoke combination, even though the octopus was always a little overcooked. Nice way to get a dose of protein with a cocktail! Having given the Galley, the Wake and RD a fair shot at lunch on this cruise, I would probably eat lunch here more frequently in the future.

 

Pizza Place: Not bad for cruise pizza. We ordered for takeaway a couple of times and the pies came out quickly, hot and fresh. Crust a bit bland, but I don’t expect them to do a 3-day ferment for flavor development on a cruise ship. They could have been a little more generous with toppings, though.

 

Grounds Club: We had Deep Blue Extras perks on this cruise, which included a $10 credit here daily. If we hadn’t, I wouldn’t have paid for it. The Intelligentsia coffee beans they use are awful – I think it’s a light roast, and all of the espresso drinks were horribly acidic (and maybe over-extracted). The included drip coffee isn’t great either, but at least you’re not paying extra for it. I will say service was very good at both locations.

 

Beach Club at Bimini: We had a nice, if not very beachy, meal here. The menu is just kind of odd for the beach, where people are typically looking for finger foods, not a sit down meal. We liked the jerk chicken (tender and nicely spiced), ceviche, coconut corn and beans and rice. Pork was terribly dry; crispy cassava had promise but were cold and needed a sauce for dipping. Rum cake was lovely and moist. But really, we wanted nachos.

 

Social Club: This place was consistently mobbed, to the point where we didn’t want to be there long enough to order a hot dog or wings. We did grab popcorn occasionally (little light on butter but otherwise fine) and a couple of the sweet treats. The mocha fudge was horrid, almost as chewy as a caramel and stale-tasting. Cake pop and rice Krispie treat were better but too sweet and again, tasted as though they’d been sitting a while. Given the popularity of this area, I think they should rethink the layout and maybe expand the seating/TV viewing area – they could easily rework the Loose Cannon space (probably the most underutilized bar on the ship during our cruise) to make the Social Club bigger and improve traffic flow.

Edited January 8 by Alsmez
Typo

[Alsmez]

Post-Cruise Thoughts

While I enjoyed many of the dishes we sampled and the variety of venues, I came away from our week on Scarlet Lady with the distinct impression that Virgin’s reputation for having the best cuisine of any mass market line is built on a lot of smoke and mirrors. I can only compare it to Celebrity, which we most recently sailed in May (Eclipse), and I will say without a doubt that VV’s restaurants are MILES ahead of Celebrity’s MDR (see my food review of Eclipse’s dining venues for proof!). However, if you compare VV to X’s specialties, Blu and Luminae, the race becomes much tighter. “But VV’s venues are all included!”, you might argue. Well, yes – but for the price of a VV cruise, you can probably afford to upgrade to specialty dining every night of a similar Celebrity sailing, with money leftover.

 

Also, because all of VV’s venues are included, they have to be very careful about offering high-end proteins and other expensive ingredients, and this DEFINITELY shows in their menus. Lobster, scallops, halibut, venison, quail, duck, foie gras, any decent cut of beef, etc. – you’re lucky to find them in one dish on one menu, or they’re only available for an upcharge as part of a “Treat Yourself” dish. Same goes for things like fragile berries in desserts, high-end cheeses (which were completely absent from the ship as far as I could tell), nuts, decent sushi, etc. The number of apple desserts alone shows you just how little REAL variety (and how much reliance on inexpensive ingredients) there is when you drill down. The Galley also demonstrates this clearly – virtually every dish is based on carbohydrates, and the selection is very limited despite the seemingly large number of venues. I mean, if you want a meat sandwich for lunch, you basically have a choice of corned beef, turkey, or shrimp. Every single day, no matter how long your sailing. Really? This is the best cuisine at sea?

 

If they are sailing full and engaging plenty of repeat customers, then maybe VV has no need to strive for improvement. After all, not every cruiser cares this much about food or considers analyzing every dish and menu a fun vacation pastime. 😊 However, their prices have gone way up, and I have a feeling that customers are going to start demanding more for their money – see the furor that Celebrity faced when they made ill-considered cuts to their dining program. The weaknesses in VV’s dining program will become more and more apparent as the shine wears off and cruisers start looking more closely under the hood. We would happily sail VV again for the right price and itinerary, but a long cruise with a lot of sea days? Probably not, and the food would be a major factor in that decision. That’s my two cents - thanks for reading!

[-The-True-North-]

Good read. Thank you.

[cantgetin]

Great review, thanks.  I'm not a foodie, but largely agree with your ultimate analysis even though I didn't understand many of the details.  Best steak on board used to be the "Secret Steak" at Razzle....and they took it off the menu.

[Alsmez]

6 minutes ago, cantgetin said:

 Best steak on board used to be the "Secret Steak" at Razzle....and they took it off the menu.

I heard about this - undoubtedly a cost cutting measure. Too bad the replacement burger was so appalling. I really wanted it to be fabulous but UGH!

[CineGraphic]

Nice review.

I for one love a soft creamy cheesecake over something chilled solid.

[Alsmez]

4 minutes ago, CineGraphic said:

Nice review.

I for one love a soft creamy cheesecake over something chilled solid.

Thanks! I love a cheesecake that is both creamy AND chilled, LOL. If properly baked, you should be able to have both.

[basenji56]

I concur. I was a bit disappointed in the food given the rave reviews.  Definitely not better than Oceania. Steaks were bad. Sides generally better than entrees. 

[jon81uk]

8 hours ago, Alsmez said:

I heard about this - undoubtedly a cost cutting measure. Too bad the replacement burger was so appalling. I really wanted it to be fabulous but UGH!

They reinvented the dinner menu at Razzle Dazzle, it moved away from the Instagram-friendly and mainly veggie/vegan stuff and have gone with a more upscale New American menu. I don’t think it was specifically cost cutting and more to do with reinventing to try and make it more popular as a dinner restaurant, I think there was a celebrity chef involved with the new after dark menu.

The brunch menu didn’t change significantly and as you say there is a lack in meat and too much focus on bright colours for photos, whereas the new dinner menu seems to focus a bit more on flavour.

 

A great review post overall and I agree the Galley needs work as it gets repetitive quickly.

[cantgetin]

Sorry, the new dinner menu eliminated the best dish on that menu--the Secret Steak--as well as two very good chicken dishes.  The current fried chicken was nasty when I tried it--dry and over cooked.  I've read a lot of positives for the new dinner menu, but with the elimination of three of our favorites, we really didn't care for it.  I agree that the sweet endings are better.  Unfortunately, the new menu took RD from our "go to" dinner place to "oh, is that tonight?"  It is getting increasingly hard to get excited about dinner, but maybe that reflects too many nights on board.

THe Wake is "Is it going to be good this cruise?
Gunbae is "One and done" for each sailing

We don't care for Test Kitchen.  A menu is good, B is a no go for us

Extra Virgin and Pink Agave are both good.  Each of us prefers one over the other, but a different one.

 

Our dinner plan most nights is that we have made advance reservations, but we check The Galley dinner special and cancel the restaurant if The Galley is more appealing.  The atmosphere is not great, but the food quality of that special is generally excellent.

Food at Ship Show was MUCH improved on our last sailing.

[Alsmez]

8 minutes ago, cantgetin said:

Sorry, the new dinner menu eliminated the best dish on that menu--the Secret Steak--as well as two very good chicken dishes. 

I have heard very good things about the butter chicken that was eliminated - supposedly it often shows up at the Galley as a special. I thought the absence of Indian food on the ship in general was a bummer - it's one of the things I love most about the buffet on Celebrity. Not only do saucy curries lend themselves to buffet-style service, but the chefs from the region turn out some incredible and authentic food! 

 

11 minutes ago, cantgetin said:

Our dinner plan most nights is that we have made advance reservations, but we check The Galley dinner special and cancel the restaurant if The Galley is more appealing.  The atmosphere is not great, but the food quality of that special is generally excellent.

Good call - we didn't check out the Galley for dinner on this cruise since it was our first one and we wanted to try all the restaurants, but we would definitely adopt this approach for future sailings.

[calicakes]

After reading your review( and having sailed exclusively on X and Oceania), I'm not as excited as I was.  I'm a "foodie" as well, I have a culinary education, I'm a master baker and desserts are important.  I never eat cakes on X because they're horrible.( at the buffet).

 

I also eat 90 percent organic at home, and I eat seasonally.  No berries in December.  

 

Hopefully, things improve before September.  We'll be on Valiant Lady.

[jon81uk]

37 minutes ago, calicakes said:

After reading your review( and having sailed exclusively on X and Oceania), I'm not as excited as I was.  I'm a "foodie" as well, I have a culinary education, I'm a master baker and desserts are important.  I never eat cakes on X because they're horrible.( at the buffet).

 

I also eat 90 percent organic at home, and I eat seasonally.  No berries in December.  

 

Hopefully, things improve before September.  We'll be on Valiant Lady.

On VV some of the best cakes are on the buffet, the Sweet Side counter in the Galley has some pretty good patisserie type desserts, a few are a bit heavy on gelatine and too set but many are good. One of the simplest but great is a ginger and chocolate cornflake cake topped with raspberries and blueberries.

[Tyler414]

Great review!!

I have to agree on the Beef, just not good at all.  I chalked it up on my VV cruise, to it being a Mediterranean cruise, I guess that's not the case.   Good to know.  Thanks again.

[Alsmez]

1 hour ago, calicakes said:

I never eat cakes on X because they're horrible.( at the buffet).

 

Same - we've found maybe two exceptions to that rule over the years. VV's desserts weren't any better than X, maybe not even as good (though to be fair, we didn't try any desserts from the Sweet Side counter in the Galley that jon81uk cited). Lots of them tasted more or less the same despite looking different, too, especially the chocolate desserts. 

 

18 minutes ago, jon81uk said:

On VV some of the best cakes are on the buffet, the Sweet Side counter in the Galley has some pretty good patisserie type desserts, a few are a bit heavy on gelatine and too set but many are good. One of the simplest but great is a ginger and chocolate cornflake cake topped with raspberries and blueberries.

 

Too-set desserts are an issue on X too, drives me nuts. I know they want beauty and stability, but come on! If they're inedible, at a certain point they just become decorative waste.

[cantgetin]

4 hours ago, Alsmez said:

 

Too-set desserts are an issue on X too, drives me nuts. I know they want beauty and stability, but come on! If they're inedible, at a certain point they just become decorative waste.

REminds me of my daughter's graduation luncheon, prepared by a well known chef in our town who also had a son graduating.  Daughter looked at the cake and announced to the table that it was going to be terrible.  Someone asked how she knew, and she repeated our cruise mantra that the better it looked, the worse it would taste.  The entire table agreed that the only edible part of that cake was the fresh strawberry garnish on each piece. 

[Moochi]

Great review! Currently on a VV ship on our  night. Haven’t tried all venues yet but agree with your options. The food is just not as great as X’s Luminae, let alone their higher end specialty restaurants. I will still book VV for the overall experience so far, but won’t be excited about the food